07/09/2005 Entry: "It's a prehistoric bird! (House II)"

Saw House II: The Second Story (1987) last night. I'm a fan of the original film, but the sequel...my God, what an unexpected treasure this was. Rated PG-13 as opposed to the original's R and played mostly for laughs, I'm unbelievably amazed that a movie starring everything from mummies to zombie cowboys to caterpillar/dog mutants and beyond managed to be so rife with subtlety. It's not laugh-out-loud funny or anything -- it's way deeper. I think the writers and producers knew what they were going for -- something truly oddball -- but instead of banging it over your head in that "LOOK HOW WEIRD WE'RE BEING" way (see: Basket Case 2), they act as if this element of the film doesn't exist. I know I'm not explaining it correctly, but put it this way -- there's a scene where the lead hero wrestles a baby pterodactyl for a crystal skull, and they didn't use zany music. No zany music! I appreciate films like that, and I think you'll love House II. Currently being sold on the cheap on DVD in a two-pack with the original, I'm writing "recommended" on my cat's ass and making it moon you. I've read a bunch of reviews this afternoon, and most buffs seem to consider it one of the worst horror sequels ever. If you can't appreciate Royal Dano playing a resurrected cowboy from the old west trying to drive a corvette, you just suck, man.

Speaking of which, there's a scene where Dano Cowboy Ghost Mummy is flipping through channels on the television, because whenever someone from the past is brought to the present in any movie ever made, they MUST BE AMAZED BY TV. As he's scouring, keep an eye out for an old Toys 'R Us commercial, and better yet, the commercial for Big Stuf Oreo cookies. Hells yeah.

EDIT: Oops, it's Saturday. Time for another Bored Saturday Night Convo Thread. Chat away.

Chestnuts roasted by The Modern Day Pirates @ 07/09/2005 08:43 PM EST

Yea House II! I never saw House I but House II used to come on this weird VHF channel in Chicago all the time in the mid 90's. House II and Creepshow II were like all I ever remember seeing on the channel other than "Saturday Anime" that was a cool channel that channel 66. It only played old movies and tv shows that I'd wanna watch. Matt you should do an article about weird old channels that aren't on anymore in the New York area.

Chestnuts roasted by Pat @ 07/09/2005 08:48 PM EST

Man, I could use a Big Stuf to quell the late night munchies, but instead I'll just have to go to sleep hungry. Screw you Nabisco!

Chestnuts roasted by Mad Cow @ 07/09/2005 09:14 PM EST

We are preparing for the tropical storm and/or hurricane that should arrive by tomorrow afternoon. And by preparing I mean going to the thrift shops grand reopening event and buying lots of neat stuff and observing lots of strange people while eating delicious free hot dogs.

Dirt poor hicks try to act rich when they are shopping at the thrift store to impress the well- to-do alternative kids buying He-man bed sheets and ties made of fake pearls. It's a rare fact people don't know about the south. Fried Green Tomatos is a lie.

-I'm going to expand upon this and make it into an article. Come read my friends.

Chestnuts roasted by Kennef @ 07/09/2005 09:15 PM EST

I exposed Eastern OH and Western Pennsylvania to the glory that is My Fair Lady sung in Hungarian tonight. What did you all do?

Chestnuts roasted by Anne Packrat @ 07/09/2005 09:33 PM EST

The House review is one of my very favorites ever...I've reread it many many times. I was looking for info about Slater's (from Saved by the Bell) real name...of course Google lead me to old X-E and "Stupid Saved By The Bell Character Profiles". They're all almost exactly five years old...if you've never read any oldie old X-E check 'em out.
I bought a Hostess apple pie today, and half of the packages were no longer sporting Fruit Pie the Magician!!! Just some boring old apple! Anybody know if he's being phased out?
Anybody doing Harry Potter marathon reading sessions lately? I've been trying to reread all five before Friday night...just finished Prisoner so I'm not exactly on schedule but if I hurry and continue to resist too much computer time I think I can do it. I know I'm not the only Potter nut around here. How are y'all killing the time?

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 07/09/2005 10:31 PM EST

i am spending saturday night home with my cat. how sad? boyfriend is at a bachelor party at the meadowlands. i think i might try to catch i, robot on cable.

Chestnuts roasted by jessica_76 @ 07/09/2005 10:34 PM EST

Speaking of Hostess, anybody see those new Wonka Cakes? Them be Hostess Cupcakes with purple icing. Purple icing!

In other X-E-related-type news, Toys R Us now carries Star Wars M&M Mpire figurines.

Chestnuts roasted by Luap @ 07/09/2005 10:41 PM EST

Hey Matt - doesn't House II also feature Cliff from Cheers brandishing a samurai sword at one point?

Chestnuts roasted by Commander Awesome @ 07/09/2005 10:54 PM EST

Loved the original House, I mean come on - RICHARD MOLL!

Bored Saturday nighter. The nights looking up though. While watching an episode of Sopranos I flipped through and saw Over the Top was coming on later tonight. That movie is without a doubt the greatest movie about arm wrestling ever made!

Chestnuts roasted by SonofStimpy @ 07/09/2005 11:02 PM EST

House II is one my friends and I watched alot. I think it played heavily on Cinemax's early 90s quasi-horror rotation. I'm remembering it with Killer Klowns, Teen Witch, and My Best Friend Was a Vampire.

I'm spending my Saturday night studying for an exam, wondering what the next X-E kool-aid flavor will be, and waiting for a 1958 movie called "Teenage Monster" to start.

Does anyone else know of or watch Offbeat Cinema? It's a Saturday late-night show on ABC affiliates that features "classic" B movies that are discussed during commercial breaks by three beatniks... complete with bongos.

Chestnuts roasted by Carri @ 07/09/2005 11:03 PM EST

Commander: I totally thought you were mixing up your Cheers alums but IMDB bears you out.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 07/09/2005 11:07 PM EST

Saturday night. Hanging out with friends, watching Curb Your Enthusiasm. Afraid of the Charlie and the Chocolate Factory Hostess Cupcakes.

Chestnuts roasted by Jessica @ 07/09/2005 11:25 PM EST

just watched XXX 2, these movies really are good if you look at them as comedies. a lot of really bad action movies become good if you reclassfiy them as comdey. sometimes stupid comdey, but i'm ok with that.

Chestnuts roasted by RAS @ 07/09/2005 11:40 PM EST

If anyone gets Showtime In Demand, they're running Ghoulies.

Spent most of the day putting together various articles, then not wanting to write them, then dismantling and starting over. Think I'm on the right track, now.

Mad Cow: Seed of Chucky is worth watching. I didn't leave the theater loving it, and it's taken a while for me to even appreciate it, but I think they pulled off something pretty amazing with that one. It's amazing how far Chucky's come.

Pat: I'm all about those networks. Not sure if you've been reading long enough to catch this, but check out the tribute to WPIX's Shocktober. Pretty much every kid who grew up in the tristate area in the later `80s-earlier `90s should remember it.

Commander Awesome: Yes, Cliff is in House II. And he's friggin' amazing. It's worth seeing for a lot of reasons, but that's one of the big ones.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 07/09/2005 11:51 PM EST

I don't have Showtime and get so frustrated everytime I see that they're playing Ghoulies in my program guide. Why even show it to me if I can't watch it!!!
Has anybody watched that new HBO show Cathouse? It's definitely..."late night programming" but it's hilarious and also quite informative.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 07/10/2005 12:05 AM EST

Haven't seen that, but I'm growing fond of The Comeback. Kudrow is amazing in it. Honestly didn't think she'd be able to find a role that didn't feel like a continuation of the Friends character -- or at least, one that wasn't "just there," like her stint as random wife in the Analyze flicks.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 07/10/2005 12:07 AM EST

I'm enjoying Comeback too, especially Kudrow's performance. She's pitch perfect and always in character. I wish they'd decide whether she's a total bitch or an innocent victim type, though. (I've started watching Entourage this season too and am not incredibly impressed, though it's got buzz coming out of it's ears. Haven't heard/read anyone talk about Cathouse, but that could be because nobody wants to admit they're watching it.)

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 07/10/2005 12:28 AM EST

I know what you mean about her character, but I've decided to find the bitchy aspects as just part of her insanely self-conscious, put-up-a-front nature. As far as Entourage goes, it's an *entertaining* show, but for some reason, I just don't think it's very good. For one, it just doesn't feel very realistic to me, and a show like that probably should feel realistic -- or at least, follow suit with what actually goes down in the entertainment business, and draw from that, rather than either exaggerate the stereotypes or plainly make up goofy stuff just because it suits the characters. HBO shows are almost criminally engaging, even when they're at their worst. Six Feet Under gets into some serious, episode-spanning slumps almost every season, but I'm still drawn to it no matter what. Entourage feels more like a sitcom with aspirations beyond its means.

What's Cathouse about? I honestly don't think I've even heard of it!

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 07/10/2005 12:35 AM EST

Cathouse is about a legal brothel and the fun they have.

Chestnuts roasted by RAS @ 07/10/2005 12:45 AM EST

Matt: Cathouse is a reality show about the lives of hookers who work in a... wait for it... a cathouse! I haven't seen it, just ads. I don't have HBO. In fact, I've not seen ONE episode of The Sopranos ever

I want to see Deadwood at some point. I'm a sucker for a good Western, especially when it goes futher than the gunplay to the lives of the people involved (watch Unforgiven if you haven't yet, it's excellent).

I was interested in Carnivale too... too bad it got cancelled, I heard it was cool.

House II? I saw it a few years ago.

Matt, have you ever seen the ungodly House IV film? It's like a made for television movie, and it's pretty awful. You should watch it and write a review

And don't go looking for House III... there isn't one. There's a movie called Horror Show that was titled House III in the UK, so they called this film House IV to avoid confusion...?

Great job there, guys.

Chestnuts roasted by Night_Trekker @ 07/10/2005 12:55 AM EST

Haven't seen House IV/III yet. And Carnivale is/was amazingly good.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 07/10/2005 01:07 AM EST

Another Matt Chat? Good, then I can dare to ask it....

Right now I'm sitting on an article for my site that turned out to be the funniest one in months. I could run it there but since you've been so busy lately I could let you debut it as a guest article. What do you think of that?

Chestnuts roasted by Mars @ 07/10/2005 01:07 AM EST

Yes it's about the famous Moonlite Bunny Ranch brothel in Nevada...HBO doesn't even link it from their main webpage, but here's the synopsis. It's not for everybody, what with the filthiness of it all. I'm sad to learn there's only 7 eps...My favorite aspect of watching is trying to figure out the tabs these people are racking up.
Traj, have you read about the Carnivale scandal? There was a write-up in the LA Times a few weeks back...
Initially I thought it was a corny idea, but I'm completely sold on Rome and it won't even be airing for months. I'd still rather have new Sopranos or (ha ha) new Carnivale this fall though. I missed early seasons of both Deadwood and SFU so I'm dying to get my hands on DVDs.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 07/10/2005 01:07 AM EST

Mars: I appreciate the offer, but for better or worse, I've decided to do the site solo. It's been so long since X-E had other writers that it'd feel...well, wrong.

WHAT Carnivale scandal???!

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 07/10/2005 01:09 AM EST

It is a solo effort, but you have to admit that the blog comments add something to the site. Read comments as faithfully as i read the articles.

Chestnuts roasted by RAS @ 07/10/2005 01:15 AM EST

Oh definitely, RAS. I'm really happy with how the blog's turned out. Nice group of folks.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 07/10/2005 01:18 AM EST

I know it's not horror, but does anyone remember the kid's movie from the 80's "Purple People Eater" w/ Doogie Howser? Thinking of those songs from that time the other day reminded me of that movie. I had it on VHS and watched it non-stop. That would make a great review.

Chestnuts roasted by kb @ 07/10/2005 01:28 AM EST

Matt, you really should check out Dead Like Me sometime. It was truly one of the best shows on television till they gave it the axe. What's really sad is that Showtime got rid of DLM so they could have a spot for crap like Barbershop: The Series.

Chestnuts roasted by Punisher Bass @ 07/10/2005 01:37 AM EST

I had a long day at work today, so I'm just relaxing and enjoying my latest round of Revenge of the Sith figures.

At TRU, they're selling these two packs of figures for 9 bucks, so I was finally able to get my hands on an elusive AT-TE Gunner figure, although I had to buy a Bail Organa figure, which I hadn't otherwise planned to buy. Oh well. Yay!

Chestnuts roasted by marioshoku @ 07/10/2005 01:40 AM EST

Matt,

I love House 2! Also, some kid in study hall back in high school gave me some torn-up comic book he'd found in his locker.. turned out to be the official Marvel Comics movie adaption of House 2!

Chestnuts roasted by Review the World @ 07/10/2005 01:41 AM EST

I'm get the opposite feeling with you guys here. I LOVE Entourage but can't stand Comeback. Am I supposed to feel sorry for Lisa Kudrow's character because everyone around her is a jerk? I don't. I just don't find that show funny.

Carnivale was ok. I watched it more out of habit than actually caring about it.

Six Feet Under has been pretty good this season compared to the last two rather boring seasons. But I'm actually kind of glad this is it's last season since they seem to be doing the same things for awhile now. I get the feeling that at least one of the Fischer's is going to die this season (my guess, Billy goes berzerk again and kills either Claire, Nate, or Brenda in a rage). You got to end the show somehow.

Deadwood rocks even though I have no clue what is going on half the time.

Cathouse is an interesting show. I'll leave it at that.

As for what I did tonight, I watched Teen Titans, Justice Leaue Unlimited, a doc on the hitory of punk music on IFC, and a pretty good film called SLC Punk.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 07/10/2005 01:42 AM EST

Okay, I found the text of the LA Times article here.
Basically, some guy is claiming he wrote the ideas for Carnivale in his novel back in the 80's and is suing HBO over it: "The suit describes a character in the novel named Brother Ezra, an up-and-coming radio preacher with a large tattoo on his chest of dead foliage. He dreams of building a large temple in Beulah City to attract more congregants...Likewise, the suit noted, the novel includes a dwarf named Doc Catchem, a 'smooth-talking, articulate, fancy dresser'". There are more similarities too if you read the article.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 07/10/2005 01:49 AM EST

This was buried in the musc thread, but here's a repost to any of didn't see it:

I don't remember the first songs I was into, but I will tell you about the very first CD i ever bought (and still listen to):

Saturday Morning Cartoons' Greatest Hits

it was released sometime around 1995 and that's probably when I bought it. It has 19 different songs from classic saturday morning shows, but covered by 90's bands

they were:

1) The Tra La La Song (The Banan Splits theme) by Liz Phair with Material Issue
2) the Speed Racer theme by Sponge
3) Sugar Sugar (from The Archie Show) by Mary Lou Lord w/ Semisonic
4) the Scooby-Doo, Where Are You? theme by Matthew Sweet
5) the Josie & The Pussycats theme by Juilana Hatfield & Tanya Donelly
6) The Bugaloos theme by Collective Soul
7) the Underdog theme by The Butthole Surfers
8 ) the Gigantor theme by Helmet
9) the classic 60's Spiderman theme by The Ramones
10) Jonny Quest/Stop That Pigeon (the Dastardly & Muttley In Their Flying Machines theme) by Reverend Horton Heat
11) Open Up Your Heart and Let The Sun Shine In (from the Flintstones) by Frente!
12) Eep Opp Ork Ah-Ah (from The Jetsons) by Violent Femmes
13) Fat Albert theme by Dig
14) I'm Popeye The Sailor Man by face to face
15) Friends/Sigmund & The Seamonsters theme by Tripping Daisy
16) Goolie Get Together (from the Groovie Goolies) by Toadies
17) the Hong Kong Phooey theme by Sublime
18 ) the H.R. Pufnstuf theme by The Murmurs
19) Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy (from Ren & Stimpy) by Wax

to me, the best songs are tracks 1, 2, 6-10, 12 and 16. The worst ones are proably tracks 13 and 19. To those, I'd prefer to the originals (preferrably Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy)

I haven't been able to stop listenting to the album for the last year or so now.

Chestnuts roasted by Invader Norbert @ 07/10/2005 01:58 AM EST

Matt you've got to do a blog entry on Pringles Prints!

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 07/10/2005 02:23 AM EST

House II rules! It's definately the best in the series. The parts with the guy from cheers as the electician/adventurer are friggin' great.

Chestnuts roasted by D-Roc @ 07/10/2005 03:38 AM EST

Has anyone seen Rescue Me on F/X? It's an awesome show. Denis Leary is a total prick in it, but somehow he still comes across likable.

Chestnuts roasted by Joe in OH @ 07/10/2005 08:41 AM EST

Being in Korea the past year has left me behind in the TV world....I have not seen even one episode of Lost, Desperate Housewives, American Idol 4, Cathouse, Comeback, OR American Dad!! Nor have I watched the Simpsons or Family Guy for 9 MONTHS...9 Months, man, I don't know whether to laugh or cry. (think Stand By Me)

Chestnuts roasted by Muppet Baby @ 07/10/2005 11:28 AM EST

Muppet Baby: Unless you're REALLY hard up for a Family Guy fix, you're not missing much with American Dad.

It's Family Guy with less laughs and all the political jokes they couldn't shoehorn into that week's episode of FG.

You know, I haven't seen ANY of that good HBO original programming. I've never seen an episode of Six Feet Under or the Sopranos.

I guess at some point in the future, near or far, I'll have a LOT to look forward to on DVD

Chestnuts roasted by Night_Trekker @ 07/10/2005 12:44 PM EST

Night_Trekker= Well, that's a good way to look at it!! Actually, a while back I WAS so hard up for a Family Guy fix that I had my Mom mail me an old VHS tape from home because I knew it had 6 episodes of Family Guy taped on it...I had to have her mail it to Korea so I could get a quick fix. You gotta do what you gotta do.

Chestnuts roasted by Muppet Baby @ 07/10/2005 12:49 PM EST

American Dad, I think, found a little more footing in the later episodes. There were a few jokes worth watching the eps for, at least. I still kinda find the alien to be unnecessary -- they haven't really done much good with that character yet, and the few times they've tried haven't gone so well.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 07/10/2005 12:55 PM EST

Matt: Yeah, I'll watch it if it's on generally, I'll just finish watching and realize I could have seen an entire episode of Family Guy instead

The alien seems pretty useless most of the time, but he's gotten a few laughs out of me. The goldfish, on the other hand, IS useless. That character hasn't said one funny thing so far, and he's hardly used at all in the course of your typical episode.

I figure they'll make an episode devoted entirely to him at some point to offset the imbalance.

Chestnuts roasted by Night_Trekker @ 07/10/2005 01:13 PM EST

IHAQ

Indeed it is I who discusses Our Lady Peace ad nauseum. They're not super huge in the states. I mean they got kinda big with 'Somewhere Out There', but by the time the Live album and DVD came out, well they were back to being the best kept musical secret ever.

I've been a fan since Clumsy and try to convert my friends constantly. I've been successful everytime

Speaking of horror movies, The Devil's Rejects comes out on July 22nd, if I recall correctly. I know there are mixed feelings on House of a 1000 Corpses, but I adore it.

Captain Spaulding forever!!

Chestnuts roasted by Knegative @ 07/10/2005 02:03 PM EST

What does Captain Spaulding forever, mean?

Sorry, I just had 17 hours of sleep. Those are not ideal conditions for me.

Well for the love of Jane Russell's big fat horse's @$$ on toast, stop posting on that g** blog

hehe

Chestnuts roasted by Knegative @ 07/10/2005 02:11 PM EST

Hooray for Capt. Spaulding, the African explorer!
Hooray Hooray Hooray!

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 07/10/2005 02:46 PM EST

Thanks for expanding my pop culture knowledge. I've never seen any Marx Bros. films/etc.

But hey

Hooray for Capt. Spaulding, the foul-mouthed murderous clown
Hooray Hooray Hooray

Chestnuts roasted by Knegative @ 07/10/2005 03:27 PM EST

I agree with the previous American Dad comments. The pilot was pretty dissapointing but subsequent episodes got better. It's no Family Guy, but it's still funnier than most TV shows (the rest of Adult Swim excluded).

As far as movies go, I watched Hi-Line last night. It was a really simple story and low budget and it wasn't really my kind of movie, but I really liked it overall. Rachael Leigh Cook was awesome.

Chestnuts roasted by Gozer @ 07/10/2005 03:32 PM EST

You're starting to sound like me Gozer, and honestly, that can't be a good thing j/k

Chestnuts roasted by Knegative @ 07/10/2005 06:38 PM EST

Joe- Rescue Me is my favorite show EVER! It doesn't get the exposure that it deserves, mainly because it's buried on FX. It is the only show that I MUST watch every week. If anyone hasn't seen it, check it out on Tuesday night. You won't be disapointed

Chestnuts roasted by bitchpants @ 07/11/2005 09:40 AM EST

I used to have this movie on VHS (I think it's at my parent's house, rotting away with the rest of my hugh 80s and 90s VHS tapes), I watched it soooo much when I was a kid, God only knows why my parents let me watch it but they did. Anyway, I totally agree with Matt, this movie is fantastic. The scene where Dano sees himself for the first time and says "I'm just an old fart" used to make me howl, not as funny now but still chuckle worthy.

Chestnuts roasted by Greg @ 07/14/2005 07:45 PM EST

Yeah, I don't know much about Dano (evidently a cult icon on some level), but his job here makes me wish they did more with him in Ghoulies II.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 07/14/2005 10:30 PM EST