01/17/2005 Entry: "The Gags & Pranks Extravaganza!"

Gotta admit, I didn't think I'd finish this on time. On the boardwalk of Atlantic City, and the same shop where I found that finagled Pokemon Pasta down below, I found....this. It's a beautiful buffet of old gags, pranks and novelties -- everything from fake puke to squirting pens...all the stuff we used to order from Johnson Smith and Brad's Fun Shop. I can't tell you how tickled I was to come across this stuff. Article features a look at a sixteen different, including such classics as the "bug in an ice cube," and of course, "snap snots." Yum. Enjoy.

Chestnuts roasted by Warx @ 01/17/2005 06:42 PM EST

Fixed, thanks.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 01/17/2005 06:45 PM EST

Nice article, where was the soap that turns stuff black? Thought that was pretty much a classic. And yeah i've eaten those joke sweets before just because there was nothing better to eat.

Chestnuts roasted by Gorm @ 01/17/2005 06:55 PM EST

I loved those toothpicks...we had em here for 20 cents a pack when I was a kid...but we could buy em at the corner store with the gummy candies...nothing like chewing fire-sticks (ok not fire or even fire-like) to make u feel cool as a kid

Chestnuts roasted by MetalRaven @ 01/17/2005 07:25 PM EST

Ugh. My sisters probably tried to get me to fall for at least half of this stuff. They loved to get a rise out of me. Sometimes I'd take the bait, sometimes I'd look at them funny and walk away, sometimes I'd go screaming to Mom that the girls were picking on me again. They sold many of these in the wonderful 99 cent store in Cape May that is now yet another T-shirt shop.

Chestnuts roasted by starwenn @ 01/17/2005 08:06 PM EST

There's a store in Sacramento called Evangeline's which sells this kind of crap, along with all sorts of bizarre stuff. I happen to have Fish-Tasting Candy and that super-spicy gum. I've also seen all those others, and will most likely get around to picking them up one of these days. Most of this stuff is made by a company called loftus, which makes all sorts of gag items, including those ruber chickens that you see. Yep, if you see one, chances are it was made by Loftus.

Chestnuts roasted by Nate @ 01/17/2005 08:11 PM EST

I lied. There are probably several other companies that make this kind of stuff. But at Evangeline's, it's typically from Loftus.

Chestnuts roasted by Nate @ 01/17/2005 08:15 PM EST

Great article! Sadly, there are people out there somewhere whom have fallen for one of these pranks. Taking a quote from the famous Garfield The Cat....they should be drug out into the street and shot.

Chestnuts roasted by Ryan @ 01/17/2005 08:22 PM EST

I had a squirting pen... squirted one foot at most. Friggin' think was more fragile than a glass ornament. Only cool thing was it came with disappearing ink. It was about the time that the "Gotcha!" craze was in full swing. I remember that disappearing ink for those water pistols was foul-smelling.

And one final thought: I remember getting a whoopie cushion once. Still had the same picture of the lady sitting on the cushion. Looked like it was from the thirties... literally. It was hard to make out the image. The plate they used to print the image on the cushion must have been ancient.

Chestnuts roasted by AlphaCentaurian @ 01/17/2005 08:23 PM EST

The article reminds me of all the times I tried to give someone a gum wrapper with alas no gum. I think I wrecked it by the redness of my face and a choking/trying not to laugh sound.

Chestnuts roasted by Allyson @ 01/17/2005 08:49 PM EST

I laughed quite a bit at this article. I love the last sentences of each one, those are great gems of afterthought. I couldn't let out a big belly laugh of appreciation, though, because of this whole "I'm at work at a credit union call center" thing...

Chestnuts roasted by kristina @ 01/17/2005 08:50 PM EST

Haha. My sister and I had the bug in an ice cube one when we were younger, we managed to freak my mother out with it several times before she finally threw it out on us.

Chestnuts roasted by Jeeto @ 01/17/2005 09:27 PM EST

I put some fake dog poop on my desk and some of my students (incredibly) still asked if it was real. How can I teach them history when they can't distinguish rubber from feces?????
No child left behind (except the restroom?)

Chestnuts roasted by manimal789 @ 01/17/2005 09:46 PM EST

To the joy of my enemies, I never got the hand to any kind of water squirting device. I seem to be doomed to use it facing the wrong way.

After becoming the laughstock already in 4th grade I decided not to use pranks that included water or any other liquid so I was exiled to the horrible and tastelessly boring world of rubber which is pretty lame no matter how good the cockroach is.

Chestnuts roasted by melonian @ 01/17/2005 10:54 PM EST

What the hell...keep the christmas lights up all year!!

Chestnuts roasted by A Dude @ 01/17/2005 11:58 PM EST

I remember reading all those on a list of pranks in the back of a magazine. They had x-ray specs that blatantly appealed to the perv in us. The picture for it actually showed a guy simultaneously looking through his hand and a girls dress. I also remember seeing an ad for a personnal hovercraft. I recall being immediatly fascinated with the idea of my own hovercraft that I could ride on water and land while being powered by a vacuum motor. I wonder if anybody actually bought one of those.

Chestnuts roasted by Ed @ 01/18/2005 01:21 AM EST

Hey, Ed- The actual Hoverboard used in Back to the Future II and III was auctioned off after the movies were finished, and it made the list of top 15 highest grossing movie auctioned products. I guess you missed your chance on it, but somebody out there DOES buy hovercrafts.

Great Article, Matt! I always wondered what half of those things really did, and now I know!

Chestnuts roasted by Muppet Baby @ 01/18/2005 01:39 AM EST

The fake beer says "choking hazard".

Chestnuts roasted by Max Jenius @ 01/18/2005 02:06 AM EST

I just found that my spicy gum is made by the Lotte Confectionary Company in Seoul, Korea. I'm wondering if they have any conection with that Lottemint Squirt Gum.

Chestnuts roasted by Nate @ 01/18/2005 02:21 AM EST

Hey, the wrapper on my hot gum says "Be Always Happy With Excellent Taste and Flavor." I guess I'll be always happy with excellent humor once I can actually get some dumbfuck to fall for this trick.

Chestnuts roasted by Nate @ 01/18/2005 02:25 AM EST

Man, this brings back the memories! But who sits up waiting to post at 2:00am EST? At least this is 9:26 CAT, central African time, so I can be at work and post like a normal human (as if).

Anyone else love reading those Casper comix pages with all the wonderful stuff to buy? Not that we could get it, due to the sanctions in sunny SA, but imagining it's always better than getting it and finding out it's crap. Those worms remind me of those "little zoo" pills you put in water and got tiny foam animals - giraffes, elephants, leopards, dogs and horses. Odd combination, but hey. They were little foam animals that grew out of pills! Whooooo! :%

Chestnuts roasted by eminentfreak rides horses badly @ 01/18/2005 02:30 AM EST

Is that a real bug? It looks like it, and I would guess that it is probably toxic and more dangerous than putting bleech ice cubs in your drink

Chestnuts roasted by gaz @ 01/18/2005 08:10 AM EST

Matt...

Awesome article. I love the holiday articles, but its always nice to come back to your roots..I have one question though:
Where are the rattlesnake eggs?? Those things are the classic suckiest gag in the world.

Chestnuts roasted by Goody @ 01/18/2005 09:02 AM EST

Ed and Muppet Baby,

I can't believe I am telling this story but who cares. In 3rd grade, me and a buddy were going to buy one of those hovercrafts, fly across the Atlantic (making approriate stops at islands of course) and go to Scotland to find (you ready?) the Loch Ness Monster.
This is why I am glad we are having a girl. Little boys are pretty stupid.
P.S. Mrs. Manimal is in early labor so I guess today is the day. (in Mr. Burns' voice) Excellent.

Chestnuts roasted by manimal789 @ 01/18/2005 09:52 AM EST

Goody -- no rattle eggs were present, but I included them in the logo for the article if you look close.

And for the person who mentioned it, I remember buying black soap there, but for some reason it wasn't on us when we got home.

Stolen soap.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 01/18/2005 11:10 AM EST

Great He-Man News!

http://www.tvshowsondvd.com/newsitem.cfm?NewsID=2749

Chestnuts roasted by Joe in OH @ 01/18/2005 11:16 AM EST

When I was really young, I bought my first boyfriend some gag stuff,for V day I believe. I remember him using the blood capsules on the teacher(pretending to puke out blood) but I dont think she fell for it. HA Im such a geek!... he gave me bazooka joe gum and a tape of The Offspring that he stole from his brother!

Chestnuts roasted by IHAQ @ 01/18/2005 11:38 AM EST

The real trick to the tricks is: patience. Look for an opening, and spring it on them. Many a pratical joke has been scuppered by rushing up and trying too hard to force a mark to go for the gimmick. My own favorite gags are/were cigarette loads and the snapping gum. The exploding loads found their way into my oldest sister's pack on several occasions, and once was sprung on a friend's brother who was always bumming smokes. I don't smoke, so no one would suspect I was the one providing the little exploders new homes in other folks coffin nails. The snapping gum was great, I actually managed to wind the spring a little tighter, put a couple of real sticks of gum in there, and got a football player to scream like a girl with it. He thought it was hilarious afterward, and borrowed it to pull on his buds. He returned it, too! Good times.

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 01/18/2005 11:42 AM EST

I think the metal doohdad in the "exploding matches" is supposed to take a plastic cap - the type you put in a toy gun.

Chestnuts roasted by Will Tingle @ 01/18/2005 12:31 PM EST

Not this version -- it's more like a shitty mousetrap.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 01/18/2005 12:33 PM EST

I actually bought some electric buzzer style fake gum from an amusement park. Even though all my buddies knew what would happen we would often endure the pain for a good laugh. I suppose some little boys never stop being stupid.

Chestnuts roasted by Ed @ 01/18/2005 01:09 PM EST

Did anyone notice that in the picture of the squirt gum, it says "Pratical Joke", and not "Practical Joke"?

Chestnuts roasted by g w @ 01/18/2005 01:46 PM EST

Jokes rule! Know what else rules? Wrestling! Hey Matt, did you know you get a shout in the new Death of WCW book from R.D Reynolds?! Are you going to do a book report on it and splice it with some of your patented humour? Please?!

Chestnuts roasted by Monkey Boy @ 01/18/2005 02:14 PM EST

"I hate worms. I love fake puke"
That should be the new slogan for this site.. or not.

Moving on. They used to sell the Cinamon Toothpicks as candy in the corner store by my school. Kids would run around all day with toothpicks projecting from their mouths like cigarettes. Maybe the store thought they had their own massive practical joke going on but we loved 'em, numb lips and all!

Ahh nostalgia.. you've done it again Matt!

Chestnuts roasted by Cyanyde @ 01/18/2005 02:18 PM EST

aside: I betcha "Gangstaz" buy the fake bullet holes to look um, you know.. Gangsta-ish!

Chestnuts roasted by Cyanyde @ 01/18/2005 02:22 PM EST

No, I didn't know that! God, RD is such an awesome guy. I'll have to send him an e-mail.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 01/18/2005 02:28 PM EST

Yeah, I'll scan the page if you want, but you should still buy the book!

Chestnuts roasted by Monkey Boy @ 01/18/2005 02:31 PM EST

I will, but if you could scan the page and e-mail it to me, it'd be most appreciated. Thanks!

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 01/18/2005 02:37 PM EST

Hopefully it should be in your inbox now!

Chestnuts roasted by Monkey Boy @ 01/18/2005 03:25 PM EST

I was walking around Boston the other day and discovered that our city is home to the longest-running joke store in the US! It's absolutely packed with stuff, and a sign on the door says "Yes! We have gorilla suits!"

Can it get any better than that?

Chestnuts roasted by VeganMike @ 01/18/2005 03:42 PM EST

Whoever created "fake puke" is a genius.. or not.

Chestnuts roasted by Review the World @ 01/18/2005 04:13 PM EST

Hilarious article... I always loved the bug in the ice. Also used to use cigarette loads esp during parties when those who were bumming were drunk...

BTW the "updates" page aka the blog page says "Christmas Season, 2004!" in the title bar. Just thought you'd like to know.

Pax

Chestnuts roasted by Soj @ 01/18/2005 04:29 PM EST

VeganMike: http://www.jacksjokes.com/

Joe in OH, we should try to get Entertainment Rights to have Matt do a commentary on one of the goofier He-Man episodes. enquiries@entertainmentrights.com

Chestnuts roasted by ME @ 01/18/2005 04:56 PM EST

Matt, your e-mail, matt@x-entertainment.com is bouncing my emails to you....is there somewhere else i can send you the scan of the page?

Chestnuts roasted by Monkey Boy @ 01/18/2005 05:15 PM EST

The worm drawing in the Instant Worms package looks like how I always imagined a tapeworm would look. Ew. Esp after reading The Worm Within: http://www.fray.com/drugs/worm/

Hey, maybe you could use the fishing line/roach to attach to the bottom of a real cookie. Just kind stuff the end of the line into the bottom of the cookie, and then hide it in a plate of like cookies. I bet you'd scare someone, since anything black shooting out of a pile of edibles is always scary and gross.

I'd hate to see what cocaine abused nose that fake snot would fit into. Ouch.

Good luck today, manimal. Don't faint. Make sure you stick around for the whole thing, in case she needs someone to scream at. Oh, and tell her, don't be a hero, take any pain killers offered. The experience is so much nicer shen you don't have all of that nasty pain to deal w/.

Hey, Erik, when is the next u/s again?

Chestnuts roasted by trajeal @ 01/18/2005 07:27 PM EST

I read reviews of the death of WCW, and thought about picking it up. Now that I know Matt gets a shout-out it is as good as sold. Outta curiosity is it a thank you shout-out, or is it actually in the context of the book?

Chestnuts roasted by Ed @ 01/18/2005 11:10 PM EST

Hmm...Cyanyde, where I'm from, we called those who used fake bullet holes on their cars something other than "Gangstaz". The generally accepted term was "white trash", but there are other ways of stating it.

Chestnuts roasted by Mara @ 01/19/2005 01:58 AM EST

Some of those windows seem to pop-under instead of pop-up. I hope that's a prank.

Chestnuts roasted by dfgdfggd @ 01/19/2005 08:58 AM EST

i cant even find myself in those AC stores. 5 dollars for a hot dog; guess the pranks are a better deal.

Chestnuts roasted by msa @ 01/19/2005 11:04 AM EST

The item number on the cookie roach makes me want to believe that there's atleast 17237 more of these things. I want one of those fake bullet holes. I'd put in on my forehead. That would show everybody! Show everybody!

Chestnuts roasted by iivuli @ 01/19/2005 11:51 AM EST

It's just a Thank You but it's cool that RD acknowledges Matt...I know I will if I ever write a book about my life...this site gets me through many a boring day at work!

Chestnuts roasted by Monkey Boy @ 01/19/2005 11:53 AM EST

Hi! I'm all new to this kind of pages on the net. I sertanly think it's an extraordinerily page! Man. I'm your new daily guest.

Chestnuts roasted by Kråke @ 01/19/2005 01:09 PM EST

Didn't Homer try to trick Dr. Hibbert with one of those fake insect ice cubes when Marge threw a dinner party? For once, Hibbert wasn't laughing . . . he warned that it would be safer for the jokee if the joker made his own bug in a cube.

This article and the format reminds me of one of the first articles I ever read on this site and still one of my all time faves. The amzing incredible bag o crap.

http://www.x-entertainment.com/articles/0856/

Chestnuts roasted by Pedro @ 01/19/2005 01:44 PM EST

ED & Muppet Baby: There's a show on the Discovery Channel called Mythbusters where they did the vaccuum cleaner hovercraft and actually got it to work with a little rejiggering. Pretty cool show.

Bugs in ice cubes? You're more likely to fool someone with those plastic lightup ice cubes.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 01/19/2005 04:56 PM EST

Man those things really brought me back! In addition to the snapping gum, my friends and I used to love the gum that turned a person's mouth blue. It was mint flavoured, so the unsuspecting chewer would keep in their mouth for awhile before realizing their entire mouth was blue. Ahh, the memories!

Chestnuts roasted by jolie @ 01/19/2005 04:58 PM EST

my favorite pranks growing up had to have been the things you put in cigarettes that exploded. I use to get my grandparents and dad all the time and got the greatest reactions! I remember those ads for the hovercrafts, in the back of Boy's Life magazine.. man there was some cool stuff in that. Anyone ever had the "smoke from fingertips" stuff? it was sticky and gooey and when you put it on your fingertips and rubbed them together strings of the gooey stuff, "smoke", wafted out.

Chestnuts roasted by Will @ 01/20/2005 12:25 AM EST

Oh man, the description of the fake beer was DEAD ON! Urine topped with fried cheese. Hilarious!

I remember buying one of the "spicy hot" gums once. The package said they were blistering hot, but when my friend's dad took one he thought it was pretty good and our prank was deflated.

A great alternative use for the classic whoopie cushion would be carrying it around like under your armpit and letting it rip when your around other people. That is, if you're the type of person who is amused by seeing other people react when they think you just laid one in their face.

Chestnuts roasted by Al @ 01/20/2005 12:37 AM EST

I work at a video store 2 doors away from a shitty dollar store, and my boss has had to tell the owner many times to get rid of those damn stink bombs. The little punk kids (little bastards!!!!!!) were throwing them down the outside video drop box like its a perfectly acceptable practice to do so. Well, imagine their suprise the one day when my co-worker, Chris, who is so timid, walked out of the store and threw it at them. Needless to say, this rag tag bunch forgot to DETONATE the friggin stink bomb. Dumb kids. They haven't done it since--maybe my boss finally got to the manager, or perhaps she threatened to have her employees throw them in his store. In that case, I would have lined up at the opportunity to do so.

Sigh.

Anyways, Matt, great article as always. Always fun to read about your exploits to AC. I was there several weeks ago, January 8th, and I won $146.50 on the Fox and the Hound slots at the Borgata. I thought that was great...till my bf Steve won over $300. Oh well.

Sigh (again).

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 01/20/2005 09:36 AM EST

BTW, Chris (co-worker mentioned above) isn't timid anymore.

That fake beer looks like it fermented too long. Yuck. Fake snot?! Someone with a cold could produce equally nasty stuff for free (not that that's fascinating and such). Bug ice cube is so outdated--it's been done.

We did gag bags in 4th grade, and I put the fishy candy in the gag bag. I heard the girl who got it had to spit it out in seconds. I didn't like her anyway. Yea!!!!!!!

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 01/20/2005 09:41 AM EST

Hmmm...no whoopie cushion. Im shocked...

Chestnuts roasted by Alex @ 01/20/2005 02:14 PM EST

Who's my little Cookie Roach?
Who's my little Cookie Roach?
You're my little Cookie Roach!
Yes, you are!

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 01/20/2005 05:52 PM EST

HIGH-larious!
Like everyone else, I was fascinated by stupid crap like this, back when I was a member of the target demographic. The most ambitious prank I ever attempted, however, was homemade: One April Fool's Day, I devised a fool-proof (no pun intended, ha-ha) plan to put one over on Mom & Dad--I would grease all of the doorknobs in the house, effectively trapping them inside! Of course, being 8 or so and not having access to any disposable income to speak of, I had to make do with what common household lubricating element could be found to do the job. Apparently, the best thing my 8-year-old brain could devise at the time was to use a stick of margarine from the fridge. Imagine my chagrin when, having thouroughly buttered the "nooks and crannies" of the Thomas' English Muffin that was my home, and subsequently taken refuge in the family room (at least 3 impassable portals away from my parents' bedroom), good ol' Mom & Dad came a' stompin' down the stairs, and into my newly-aquired private fortress with no discernable difficulty whatsoever--and they were none too happy to boot. Their Houdini-esque foiling of my plot, while actually more Copperfield-esque in retrospect, did much to solidify their status as omnipotent uber-beings in my eyes, as well as put me off of the ol' practical jokes from that day forward.

Anyway, sorry for the Neverending Post-y, (ah-o-ah, ah-o-ah, ah-o-uh), but I thought other readers might relate to the experience of well-conceived, poorly executed gags from their youth.

Oh, and Matt, not to split hairs, but aren't snowflakes already the snowflakes of the material world?

Chestnuts roasted by seegeepee @ 01/20/2005 08:47 PM EST

OK, one last thing...is it just me, or is the "Snap Snots" just a little bit...phallic? In a Dirk-Diggler-kinda-way? If you squint just right? Anyone? Hello? I guess it is just me. Damn!

Chestnuts roasted by seegeepee @ 01/20/2005 09:02 PM EST

I seem to remember the bug in the ice cube not being able to float in liquid; obviously a technology that needs improving. And yes, that is a really snuggly and warm site background of christmas lights.

Chestnuts roasted by Krappy Kat @ 01/21/2005 09:04 AM EST

Just thought some of you might be subconsciously curious...

While going through my stats, it was interesting to see which gags and pranks got the most clicks per day. Yesterday, for example, went in this order:

/articles/0923/fakebeer.html
/articles/0923/spidercreamer.html
/articles/0923/bloodymouth.html
/articles/0923/explodingmatches.html
/articles/0923/squirtgum.html
/articles/0923/instantworms.html
/articles/0923/bulletholes.html
/articles/0923/petpuke.html
/articles/0923/smellyfeet.html
/articles/0923/rubberchocolates.html
/articles/0923/hottoothpicks.html
/articles/0923/snapsnots.html
/articles/0923/garliccandy.html
/articles/0923/cookieroach.html
/articles/0923/squirtpen.html
/articles/0923/bugicecube.html

The numbers were mostly similar, with only a difference or a hundred or two between #1 and #16. I'm still shocked that bug-in-an-ice-cube, one of my personal faves, clocked in dead last.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 01/21/2005 11:54 AM EST

Now, when I see someone pull a booger out their nose, I'm gonna think of "You're a superstar." Thanks, seegeepee!

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 01/21/2005 03:25 PM EST

Hey all, it's been a long time since I've posted (and back then it was under a different name) but I just had to post this time and say the article was great. I used to love that crap, I had the fake vomit myself. Oh, and I actually fell for the snake eggs when I was younger, those things scared the shit outta me ^^;

Now that I'm older though the stuff just isn't as fun as it once was. It all looks too fake, especially the creamer ^_~

Did anybody else ever buy sea monkees because they saw them in the back of a comic book? Man, those things sounded so cool, but sadly they sucked =(

I didn't realize Matt has written this many articles since I've last been here. I need to quit Farking so much and come around here more often ^_^

Chestnuts roasted by *StAr* @ 01/23/2005 03:45 AM EST

You know something becomes more kitsch when there's a typo. The squirt gum has a typo on the product: 'pratical'. =)

Chestnuts roasted by marchant @ 01/23/2005 06:20 AM EST

Ah yes. The good ol' "pratical" jokes of youth. Made under the harshest conditions in the sweatshops of Taiwan, nothing appeased you more than slipping a bug-in-an-ice-cube into a drink, then rushing the person to the local poison center. And yes, my little sea monkies. I remeber them so vividly. I bought them to live in a plastic castle for two days, then I introduce trilobytes into the mix and watched them run for their lives. Too bad the trilobytes were cannibalistic, and I ended up with "Mongo", one the size of my hand.

We've all had fun, but remember, DON'T DRINK URIN TOPPED OFF WITH FRIED CHEESE AND DRIVE-
a message from Crashy the Tortoise

Chestnuts roasted by Mega McMahn @ 01/24/2005 09:17 PM EST

I remember having one of those oh so clever "squirting chocolates" when I was a kid...I also remember filling it with ink from the art supply cabinet.

On a related note I remember throwing the offending novelty in my best friends backpack when our 4th grade classes dim bulb got sent to the nurses office when he puked salsbury steak and ink all over his desk.

Ah the carefree joys of childhood.

Chestnuts roasted by dantewyrmfoe @ 01/25/2005 05:04 AM EST

My window still has a fake bullethole on it, 18 years after I stuck it up there when I was 5!

On a related note, my Grandfather was the king of these pranks and is the sole reason why I grew up to be the paranoid wreck I am today.

Chestnuts roasted by Lasher @ 01/27/2005 12:16 PM EST

My little brother has something like that squirt gum except on the inside of the package of gum thereb is a mouse trap thingy and when you pull the piece of gum out. IT HURTS LIKE HELL

Chestnuts roasted by Pigleg @ 01/30/2005 12:08 PM EST

One of my favourite pranks is the fake dog crap. You can put it on a table, but the best spot to put it is around the toilet.

Chestnuts roasted by Pigleg @ 02/01/2005 07:27 AM EST

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