12/14/2004 Entry: "X-Entertainment's 2004 Christmas Tree."

Well, we finally picked out our Christmas tree. Though my area is riddled with the usual bunch of lots full of twenty-buck trees run by less-than-jovial folks likely born in Hell, a few years ago we made a tradition of going to one of the smallest lots in the area – not because we liked the people, but because their trees deserved more eyes on them. Our apartment, seeming to shrink by the minute, can no longer handle the 40’ spruces we used to trim. Our new goal is simple: find a nice, semi-small tree and just decorate the holy fuck out of it. With years of thrift store finds and yard sale treasures pulling our amount of tree lights, ornaments and garland up to the point where I literally have to rent out space in my parents’ attic for the rest of the year to house it, our challenge was substantial: with a “slim” tree, how would we ever use all of our ornaments? Here is the story of my Christmas tree…

The lot was small, but even so, they were only filled to about 20% capacity on the tree front. Not a whole lot to pick from, and of the trees available, many were still trapped in those funny nets. Nobody’s gonna buy a tree they can’t see, and the biggest crime to Christmas is a tree unsold. Have you ever driven past a tree lot on Christmas Eve? You’re telling me you don’t feel bad for the poor pathetic trees that nobody wanted? If they could speak, you know what they’d say? Curse words. Lots of them.

Fortunately, they had the kind of trees we were after. There were four of five serviceable entries, each standing about six feet tall, but trim enough to pass off as “small.” The woman and I had a small disagreement over which to buy, but me, being right of course, soon won that battle. At just about the time the guys running the lot started getting pissed about all the mysterious pictures I was taking, I found our Christmas tree and had sex with it.

Beautiful, isn’t she? Oddly enough, small trees cost more than the big ones – this baby was 40 bucks plus tip. Oh well, Christmas only comes once a year, and money is no object when we’re dealing with our only God given excuse to lug a murdered tree in the living room and cover it with blinking lights and Ninja Turtle ornaments. Only Easter’s offering off dyeing eggs can compete in the “think about it and it becomes really strange” department. On the other hand, the whole point of Independence Day is to make everything explode, and three-year-olds dress up like monsters on Halloween. Next time you see a photo spread for Mexico’s Day of the Dead in National Geographic, don’t poke your buddy and laugh at the foreigners. You’re equally nutsy, filthy American.

After telling the mean guy working there that we’d decided on our tree, he went to take a shit in a nearby trailer and returned twenty minutes later ready to be of service. Next thing I knew, my poor beloved tree was being forced through some godforsaken chamber of horrors, exiting in a net with about 15,000 less needles. To the mean guy’s credit, he even drilled a few water holes into the stump. At least, I’m assuming that’s why he did it. Maybe it’s just another of his disgusting fetishes.

I bid him farewell and slipped a bonus fiver in his pocket before lugging to car and realizing that, no, not even small Christmas trees fit inside. Our adventures in getting the thing home involved many open windows, lots of string, more curse words, and one of my three Monkey’s Paw wishes. Throughout the course of this, I managed to split my hands open in at least seven different spots. I looked like I’d just delivered a baby or killed one off. Set to a score of Wham’s “Last Christmas,” it all felt much jollier than it sounds.

When we got the tree to the house, I realized that our already overly-crowded-with-Christmas-crap apartment might not actually have room for it. We managed, barely, and we owe our souls to a bad demon for it.

First up were the lights, then the garland, then about a fourth of our ornaments because we’ve collected enough of them in recent years to drown a pond. My favorites are, of course, the boxes of blown glass beauties from the 50s and 60s, in part because they look great, in part because they’re antiques that will sell well on eBay whenever I get sick of Christmas. They’re fragile, and we seem to break about a dozen of them or so each year, but yeah. Nice. Other favorites include a 1988 Ninja Turtles ornament (featuring all four heroes in Santa garb, caroling), a glass Baby Shamu ornament, and a bunch of clip-on Santa Claus doll/figures that look like Monchichis crossbred with holiday heroes. I’ll try to post up the ten best later this week.

Okay I’m tired of talking. Here’s my tree:

(click pictures to enlarge)

The pictures really don’t do it justice, but please take note of the super-sized Bumble doll wreaking havoc near the top of the tree. Oh, and check out our Christmas trees from 2002 and 2003. I can't believe I have them logged on here.

I love trees, especially Christmas ones.

Chestnuts roasted by Grey Weirdo @ 12/14/2004 11:17 AM EST

Grim Rapper is in the Box of Halloween not to be seen again untl next Oct, but you'll be happy to know that Standing Skull Man lives on with a Christmas hat.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 12/14/2004 11:17 AM EST

Huh. Standing Skull Man hits me as the type of guy who would be wearing a yamulke instead.

Chestnuts roasted by Gavok @ 12/14/2004 11:27 AM EST

Now you're making me wonder. Could Marcus the Carcass be used as a Christmas tree ornament?

Chestnuts roasted by jhnnywalkr @ 12/14/2004 11:42 AM EST

where do you find replacement bubble lights?

Chestnuts roasted by mmm bubbles @ 12/14/2004 12:08 PM EST

I heard your television crying out from amidst the Christmas cheer... "Help me... They've stuck wire ornament hangers into my cable jacks and tied my power cord up with a Devil's web of tinsel... I'm stuck here, just waiting to die..."

Chestnuts roasted by trajeal @ 12/14/2004 12:29 PM EST

Oh, dang. I am so jealous. My Christmas decorations consist of one wreath, one assembled gingerbread house, and one 24" tree sans ornaments. This is my first Christmas out of college and I am too broke to fly home or buy Christmas décor. So through the magic of the web, I can enjoy your Christmas tree! Yeah! Sure does make me jealous, though.

Chestnuts roasted by Randomness @ 12/14/2004 01:19 PM EST

Standing Skull Man with Santa hat sounds like one of my christmas decorations: cardboard Admiral Ackbar standup with Santa hat.

Chestnuts roasted by GadgetMouse @ 12/14/2004 01:20 PM EST

Reminds me of one of my favorite Xmas novelty song lyrics:
Throw it it the trunk/ tie down with cords of bun-gee.
You'll need the needles every year/ 'Cause you're a Christmas jun-ky!"
-Kill a Tree for Christ by Celtic Elvis.

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 12/14/2004 01:26 PM EST

the advent calender is starting to remind me of ,transformers, like beast wars or something like that.

WookIes!!!!! SW3 Wookies as in multiples.

Chestnuts roasted by evan @ 12/14/2004 01:28 PM EST

Matt,
What an awesome tree! It looks great! And bless you for including a Cookie Monster ornament on there! I'm glad to see people actually have THEIR trees up. We might not even get one up at this point. My house is currently under construction (new wallpaper/paint, floor, etc. ) so no tree yet...running out of time!!

Chestnuts roasted by Melissa Y. @ 12/14/2004 01:36 PM EST

I've been looking all over for the review of A Charlie Brown Christmas, does anyone know where it's at?

Chestnuts roasted by i was a lion @ 12/14/2004 01:54 PM EST

Hey, I got my tree yesterday too! Can't wait to trim and watch It's a Wonderful Life tonight!

Chestnuts roasted by Y2JB78 @ 12/14/2004 02:10 PM EST

Last night must have been National Slackers Decorate Your Tree day because I put the goodies on mine too. My four year old only broke half the ornaments, and he escaped with only one severe beating and three menacing threats to his life, so all was well. Merry Christmas!

Chestnuts roasted by Lovn Mooseful @ 12/14/2004 03:00 PM EST

Woo! I am picking up mine on the way home tonight. Our apartment's wall's are closing in too, so ours will be fairly wee in comparison to year's past...

Y2JB78, you are watching It's a Wonderful life tonight?! Sacrilege! That's meant to be watched on Christmas eve only!!

Chestnuts roasted by B-Dawg @ 12/14/2004 03:01 PM EST

I agree B-Dawg, but it sucks now. Used to be that they played "It's a Wonderful Life" 8 million times throughout December, and then someone bought it and now they only play it once and they done did that WEEKS ago! I say boo to corporate America.
Booooooooo!

Chestnuts roasted by jhnnywalkr @ 12/14/2004 03:08 PM EST

Once when I was four I found my families ornaments being stored in boxes in the closet in my room. One of which was an old transformers box. I took it down to see if that was a present. It wasn't and then I had the strange idea that the ornaments had presents inside them. I spent hours throwing each one against the wall breaking them. The sharp shards were all over my room. When my dad found me he said it was the only time he ever beat me and that after that he never needed to again. I think he was mostly mad because they were the old glass blown ones from when he was little + it was dangerous but I deserved what I got. Funny thing is It didn't even happy near Christmas.

Chestnuts roasted by Pat @ 12/14/2004 03:45 PM EST

I decorated my (fake) tree the week after Thanksgiving, for three reasons:

1. I figured, if I didn't get it done then, I wasn't going to get around to it until New Year's.

2. Because it IS fake, I can put it up and not worry about it being naked by the 25th.

3. Because I CAN.

Actually, I'd love to have a real tree. I'm not really worried about the needles. I have a thin carpet that won't retain water, much less pine boughs. I don't trust a large, living piece of flora around my ancient heater, especially since I had to put the tree periously close to it this year. (The place I USED to put the tree is now blocked by a couch that can't go anywhere else.)

My folks had real trees for years. I still fondly recall trips in mid-December for the whole family to pick the perfect specimen. These trips usually turned into Mom and Dad bickering over whether or not the needles would fall off today or next week while my sisters and I played hide-and-seek and tag amid the branches, and they almost always ended with dinner at Wendy's (complete with the now-defunct salad bar and Mexican and Italian "buffets".

Chestnuts roasted by starwenn @ 12/14/2004 05:12 PM EST

Yup, I'm watching it tonight. I don't have a specific time I watch it...most likely because every day during Christmas it would be on for 24 hours a day, sometimes on 4 stations at once.

Plus, Christmas Eve I have to watch my first of 12 consecutive viewings of the Christmas Story. I swear, I love they started doing that. That is by far the thing I look forward to most at Christmas (sorry Advent calendar!!).

Chestnuts roasted by Y2JB78 @ 12/14/2004 05:14 PM EST

I love real trees, but allegies prevent me from having one. Not to mention the Sap...

In my small apartment, I have a wreath on the door (lights up, too), a small table-top tree, surrounded by that Anastasia Burger King train from a few years ago, some assorted holiday themed-paraphanelia, etc. And that's enough for me, at least in my apartment. Can't wait till I have more space...Out will come the Lionel and LGB!

Chestnuts roasted by Cameron T. @ 12/14/2004 05:29 PM EST

You think an Ent would make a good Christmas tree?

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 12/14/2004 05:49 PM EST

It looks nice Matt, but the real bitch will be taking all the Christmas gear down, and getting the tree back out again.

And holy shit, I thought I was the only person on this spinnin' blue ball to have a plush Rodney Reindeer. It seems Target had a plush Christmas themed toy every year. But for whatever reason, they stopped.

Chestnuts roasted by Dude McGuy @ 12/14/2004 06:22 PM EST

Beau-ti-ful!
Isn't Christmas fun?

Chestnuts roasted by Cyanyde @ 12/14/2004 07:34 PM EST

The biggest thing I miss at my new apartment is a Christmass tree. Unfortuently my school dosent allow them so for the first time in my life I will be spending the bulk of the anticapatory x-mass season w/o one.

Chestnuts roasted by Zerohandel @ 12/14/2004 08:00 PM EST

Matt, is that a Playmobil Advent Calendar in the top right corner??? And I see a toy Gengar on one of the shelves too.

Man...I'm suprised how you're able to make that epic Advent Calendar with all that clutter...

Chestnuts roasted by Invader Norbert @ 12/14/2004 08:26 PM EST

Yeah your christmas trees are just how they are suppose to be very busy and insane with colored lights, and random bulbs and the like

Chestnuts roasted by LordSorrow @ 12/14/2004 09:10 PM EST

my favorite thing about christmas is all the sex.

this is my first post on matt's site.
matt, your site is awesome. do you really read these? if so, punch me in the face next time i see you.

merry xmas.

Chestnuts roasted by zack @ 12/14/2004 09:51 PM EST

I had a real tree once. They're overrated. The darn thing shed all over the place. We got a real great deal on a fake tree back when there was a Sears Surplus store, and it looks pretty enough in the living room.

Chestnuts roasted by ShadowWing the Technorganic Reindeer @ 12/14/2004 10:15 PM EST

Matt, your tree is so weird looking. I don't think they make Spruces in Oregon.

But I really wanted to comment because I drove 20 minutes to a tree farm and picked out my baby from thousands of still-living trees, smote it, and gave the farm owner a whopping $12 for the 6' Douglas Fir.

Living in Oregon rocks, if you're into... Christmas Trees.
Given your sexual reputation, I'd say you are.

PS Don't get me wrong, I really like your tree, I'm just not familiar with the type. Love the Bumble!

Chestnuts roasted by Kristina @ 12/14/2004 10:46 PM EST

Wanna hear a sad story? No? Well, too bad, cuz I'm tellin it anyway!

For years, my family and I had the tradition of driving to this tree farm during every Thanksgiving break, and cutting our own tree (when you cut your own tree, and take good care of it, it'll definitely last from thanksgiving until Christmas; my friends were always surprised at us getting a tree so early). As I got older, I came to be the official tree-cutter. Now some have wondered why we would go through such trouble (I just smacked one of my friends across the face for talking shit like this, and i still seriously hate him for this and all fo his other cynical asshole remarks!), but it was a favorite tradition of mine. We'd always pick out a fucking huge-assed tree that looked great. We'd have it netted by rough-looking but jovial dudes working at the tree farm, get a candy cane from the lady at the booth where you pay for the tree, put her in the back of the truck, and head on home. We'd get home and spray her (spared us any bug infestations) and hosed her down, then put her inside on a stand in the livingroom. The next evening would be a night of the family decorating the tree and having hot chocolate. It's a fond memory.

How is this a sad story? Well, first of all, when I went away to school in Canada, which celebrates a completely different kind of Thanksgiving on a completely different day, I couldn't be there to go perform the tradition, thus making my brother the official tree-cutter. And the final offense? My family no longer does this. Last year, they got a fake tree! A FUCKING FAKE TREE!!!! BLASPHEMERS!!!!!!!!!!

Christmas has not been the same since. I have other sad stories rearding the changes of Christmas traditions, but I won't depress you any further. Just let me tell you this, when I have a family of my own, there will be no fake trees anywhere in home.

Matt, kudos to you for actually getting a real tree.

Chestnuts roasted by Nate @ 12/14/2004 11:44 PM EST

No doubt about it; she's a beaut.

Chestnuts roasted by manimal789 @ 12/14/2004 11:52 PM EST

I think an Ent would make a fine Christmas tree, as long as it could keep it's mouth shut for awhile. A walking tree would be pretty cool ("Hey, get me a beer, huh?", but talking would just be too much. Esp if it was a complaining, bitchy Ent who criticized everything you did. "Don't hang that Rainbow Brite stocking so close to the Elmo drum ornament. They're from different decades! Stop playing that annoying Marilyn Monroe, sex-talk song. It's an innuendo! I have a headache. Bleh!"

Chestnuts roasted by trajeal @ 12/14/2004 11:56 PM EST

For the first time in 20 years I shall not be home until two whole...actually...partial...days before christmas. No tree decorating for me this year

Chestnuts roasted by FangsFirst @ 12/15/2004 12:38 AM EST

i have those glass ornaments too! they're my favorite, i think, but someone drops one at least every year.
this post made me really excited to go home in two days and decorate the hell out of our tree.
thanks for all the holiday spirit, matt!

Chestnuts roasted by candice @ 12/15/2004 01:23 AM EST

Hell, I'm too impatient-- I always put our tree up a couple hours after Thanksgiving dinner. We've got lots of Masters of the Universe stuff-turned ornaments crammed onto ours, along with plenty of legite ornaments. I totally sympathize with you having to cram a tree into a tiny space; I once had this tinyass apartment, and I refused to go without a tree. The only place I could possibly fit one was in fron of the sink in the kitchen, so everyone was always knocking the damn thing over. The tree was in shambles by the time Christmas arrived.

Chestnuts roasted by Drunken Fist @ 12/15/2004 02:06 AM EST

Wow..awesome tree. Reminds me of my grandma's..of course she would have a bigger tree and such, but it was packed with tons of ornaments like yours-we had a trashcan full of em.

..now I notice how odd that sounds.

Anyways, I'm amazed people have enough spirit these days for all that stuff. Kudos.

Chestnuts roasted by Hollow @ 12/15/2004 02:57 AM EST

How the hell do you keep your cats from destroying everything?

Our tree looks pitiful right now because there are only orniments on like the top 3 feet since the cats got to all the others....

Chestnuts roasted by Lauren @ 12/15/2004 04:02 AM EST

I think our tree has more crap per branch than yours. I would post a picture, but I don't know quite how. You do have more festive junk in your place than we have, I'm deeply moved

Chestnuts roasted by gaz @ 12/15/2004 06:02 AM EST

Your tree ate Santa and vomited him back up. Hmmm, diagnosis would be aided by a closer look at the ninja turtle ornament...

Chestnuts roasted by dindin @ 12/15/2004 07:10 AM EST

you guys, I'm kinda worried about Matt. Someone needs to go over and tidy up his place. Just looking at the pictures of the entertainment center is stressing me out.

Please Matt. Let me clean for you.

Chestnuts roasted by Whirred @ 12/15/2004 08:30 AM EST

Put my fake tree up here in Korea on Nov. 29th, to make it feel as Christmas-y as possible for as long as possible! I love Matt's tree though- makes me wish I could have a real one- but here, I was lucky enough to find some good ornaments. I seriously think that the Xmas TREE is my favorite part of the whole holiday season.

Chestnuts roasted by Muppet Baby @ 12/15/2004 09:20 AM EST

God Matt yr tree reminds me of mine when I was little. We had tons of those glass ornaments. My mom even had some that had our names on them. We also had these metal ones with our birthdays too. My tree is sad next to yrs. Filled with enough dollar store stuff to kill a mule.

Chestnuts roasted by Thenewt4u @ 12/15/2004 10:03 AM EST

Holy shiite that was an expensive tree. Back home (Skaneateles, NY) we live across the street from a Christmas tree farm.

You wouldn't believe how many people try to steal them at night. At least once a night. So we watch out for them at night, collect the money, and give it to the owners. We save them like $300 a year. I kid you not.

They return the favor by giving us a free tree every year.

Chestnuts roasted by Jeff Mack @ 12/15/2004 10:49 AM EST

omg. Your house is almost as bad as ours, lol. My mother goes crazy with the decorating, there's no room left untouched (including the bathroom, which is covering in window clings and has ornaments in the window of the shower).

$40 is a lot for a small tree. We paid $15 for our real tree this year. I wish we could've gone out and cut one down though

Chestnuts roasted by Mandi @ 12/15/2004 11:36 AM EST

Nate, did you take the tree home or the lady who gave you the candy cane? At home, we are in the middle of re-arranging the front room to make a proper space for the fake tree. Ma's like, "Move that there, no over here's better. Scoot that one over. What are we going to do with that?" The usual Mom directions. And I'm putting up new hooks for our lights, so this week it's dumpy Spider-Man time again. According to Nodwick.com, Ents that talk too much are seen as very odd amongst his peers.

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 12/15/2004 11:51 AM EST

Christmas tree salespeople who are miserable get A FIVER tip from Matt? I sell HO HO trees myself. I wear 4 damn christmas antlers on my head at the same time which are coloured silver-gold-silver-gold. And all i get is a comment "NICE RACK". I'm a guy and i never ever thought i'd hear that comment. Never mind the smart comments. Just gimme tips.

Chestnuts roasted by Freezingwarm @ 12/15/2004 01:30 PM EST

Ha! Guess who has the classic "Merry Christmas DUDES!" Christmas ornament. That's right - all mine!! It may not feature any Santa garb, but I think my Christmassy Raphael snow globe makes up for that.

Chestnuts roasted by Tougi @ 12/15/2004 02:51 PM EST

Matt has always written on here that is apartment is full of stuff, but I had no idea. I mean Jesus, look at that picture. The sheer amount of "things" is breathtaking.
But the tree, it's pretty nice as well.

Chestnuts roasted by Rosella @ 12/15/2004 02:54 PM EST

I like the ice man icon. The tree is pretty nice too.

Chestnuts roasted by The Merchant @ 12/15/2004 03:07 PM EST

You have a real tree, you lucky bastard. My apartment has room for a small tree, but do we have one? NOOOOOOOO. Instead, we had to DECORATE THE FICUS TREE!!!!!!

Chestnuts roasted by Sara @ 12/15/2004 04:53 PM EST

Holy crap thats alot christmas cheer. One of these days you need to do a whole pictorial tour of the X-entertainment home base

Chestnuts roasted by thejyav @ 12/15/2004 06:34 PM EST

Hey Matt!
That's one great dead tree!
It's almost like raising the dead right?
Happy Holidays!

Chestnuts roasted by Croww @ 12/15/2004 08:41 PM EST

I have the same bubble lights. Do yours bubble? Every once-in-a-while, one or two will bubble. My tree is covered in old 80s ornaments...McD's, smurfs, strawberry shortcake, & yes, a Bumble.(P.S. I've been reading for more than 3 years I think, but I rarely post. I had to respond to the tree. I love it!!)

Chestnuts roasted by smurfarootie @ 12/15/2004 10:41 PM EST

I have had the crappiest week so far, and haven't even had a chance to get on my computer. But when I finally did tonight and read this post, I was laughing so hard. My husband kept saying, "What is so funny?" Oh, that crazy Matt. My favorite part was when he said that he found the perfect tree. And then had sex with it.

Chestnuts roasted by Inquisitivewoman @ 12/16/2004 12:35 AM EST

Hmmm, TMNT ornaments... I see that I have two, I've had them for as long as I can remember. There white circles with a picture (one has the turtles ice skating, the other has three in a sleigh, leonardo is the reindeer). I still have the original boxes too, hmmm, mirage studios 1990, toys r' us: $4.99

Chestnuts roasted by Wolfeditor @ 12/16/2004 12:42 AM EST

Hi, Matt. I have a copy of an Alden's Christmas 1976 "book of values", might it be of any use to you, my good data supplier in this fun time of year? i dont know if i should email.

Chestnuts roasted by Obelisk @ 12/16/2004 02:39 AM EST

yeah.

Chestnuts roasted by zack @ 12/16/2004 04:17 AM EST

It's a Christmas Miracle!

Chestnuts roasted by Bansheex @ 12/16/2004 05:20 AM EST

Ents wouldn't stay around for x-mas. They would get mad due to all the trees being cut down and most likely tear down your house. Ents don't like anything hanging on them except for hobbits of course

Chestnuts roasted by Ur-lord @ 12/16/2004 07:57 AM EST

Hey, I was just remembering something. Linus and Lucy had a little brother named Rerun. They made another Charlie Brown type Christmas. "Happiness is having your own puppy" he exclaimed. And it's funny (laughing histarically) because he's Snoopy's size!

Chestnuts roasted by Chachi @ 12/16/2004 09:09 AM EST

Christmas is a great fun time. Your apartment looks like the North Pole.

LET'S PARTY!

my cousin Larry Appleton and his girlfriend Jennifer locked me up in the closet. If you think just because I had to "come out" of there to get here... Don't Be Ridiculous.

Chestnuts roasted by Balki_from_Perfect-Strangers @ 12/16/2004 09:14 AM EST

Now how long after Christmas are you gonna have all that shit up. I bet it will all be cleaned up by 06/06/05.

Chestnuts roasted by BobbySox @ 12/16/2004 04:23 PM EST

What, no rope? No tinsel? What's up with that?

My favorite holiday decorations are the plastic glow-in-the-dark icicles my Mom's had since long before I was born. They look great on the tree, even when the lights are off. You should try to get some on eBay, Matt.

Chestnuts roasted by Josh @ 12/17/2004 12:26 AM EST

My favorite ornament is a Bullseye from Toy Story 2 thing I got out of a Honey Nut Cheerios box.

Chestnuts roasted by MadManPondo @ 12/17/2004 03:51 PM EST

Hey Matt, I have been reading for about a year but havnt ever posted before. I love the fact that even though I cant get up the energy to go all out on Xmas, I can go to your site and bask in the glow of your Xmas spirit

Chestnuts roasted by Sam @ 12/19/2004 03:35 PM EST

Wow, Matt. That is truly a work of art. And now I know where all my missing ornaments go every year--they are magically transported via black hole directly your living room.

Chestnuts roasted by ChaosKittty @ 12/19/2004 05:53 PM EST

the tree is one of the few thing not ruined by getting older.

I love putting on the lights and the tinsle makes a good weapon if your crazy uncle tries to kill you.

Merry Christmas!

Chestnuts roasted by Adam @ 12/19/2004 10:16 PM EST

Hey, innat the Santa from the Santa And Metroplex Cook Jiffy Pop article from a year or two back?

Chestnuts roasted by O6 @ 12/20/2004 07:17 PM EST

My tree this year is the top 1/3 of a tree my roommate and I found by our dumpster. Went out with a hacksaw and harvested it ourselves.
Still had working lights on it too... but it more or less resembles a disfigured bush.

Yours, however, is a beauty! Well done.

Chestnuts roasted by Nick @ 12/20/2004 09:23 PM EST

It totally is, O6.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 12/21/2004 07:16 AM EST

At LAST! A man after my own spirit - there is no such thing as too many decorations!

I've spent the last week or two coaxing a more decorating-challenged fan of yours to get out there and DECORATE, and she pointed me here in revenge.

I just took out the cubicle decorating prize at work here in Australia, which doesn't even feature snow at this time of year, by a sort of brute force attack featuring with anything with lights and/or animation.

I hope you don't mind my sharing the results here:

http://f2.pg.briefcase.yahoo.com/bc/meriphistimo/lst?.dir=/MOATies&.view=l

The files are bunch of video clips of the various animated decorations, and the large one (Griswald Grotto) is a tour of our winning cubicle bay - its worth the time to load it, trust me.

I just can't wait to get all this stuff home again, but I've had to keep delaying taking it apart because people keep wanting to bring their kids in to see it.

Keep up the good work - you are an inspiration!

Chestnuts roasted by wysiwyg @ 12/21/2004 06:25 PM EST

Yeah then the cat gets it. That's why we have plastic balls this year. Plastic blue balls. God damn cat.

Chestnuts roasted by Cats Suck @ 12/21/2004 07:04 PM EST

Leave it to you, Matt, to locate the claymation Rudolph wrapping paper/gifts bags this year.

I saw it at Canadian Tire (yeah yeah, go ahead and laugh at the Canuck) and thought of you.

Chestnuts roasted by everglade @ 12/22/2004 08:20 AM EST

So, Cats Suck, you're admitting to having a case of blue balls?

(stolen shamelessly from sluggy.com - see 12/21 strip)

Chestnuts roasted by Mike Weasel @ 12/22/2004 03:12 PM EST

If that tree contains an indian spirit, you are in for trouble. It looks like a $5 prositute on $1,000,000 worth of meth.

Chestnuts roasted by Jack Froost @ 12/23/2004 11:32 AM EST

#80 that tree looks pukah on crack

Chestnuts roasted by john @ 12/28/2004 10:03 AM EST

Being the decorating-challenged individual wysiwyg mentioned, I thought I should say something. Yes, I did decorate more than usual this year. I still have a long way to go however.

Thank you Matt for the Advent calendar, and for sharing your tree with us.

Chestnuts roasted by Susan @ 12/30/2004 04:32 PM EST