11/11/2004 Entry: "Bum ba bum bum..."

Chestnuts roasted by Armagideon Time @ 11/11/2004 09:02 PM EST

Gotta try that if I can find it. Also Holiday Spice Pepsi, despite the fact that it sucks.

Chestnuts roasted by Paul @ 11/11/2004 09:12 PM EST

The only flavor that a normal person could even consider drinking is Cranberry Sauce. I mean, who came up with Green Bean Casserole? And why is that person still off of Death Row?

Chestnuts roasted by mtvcdm @ 11/11/2004 09:14 PM EST

I read about this somewhere. If you drink this stuff without dying, Matt, or at least having severe contusions or loss of taste buds, I salute you.

Chestnuts roasted by starwenn @ 11/11/2004 09:21 PM EST

OMG! I saw those in the newspaper!

Chestnuts roasted by Shira @ 11/11/2004 09:26 PM EST

Whoo! I cn't wait to read the review. This stuff is everywhere, all of a sudden. Do you drink it cold or hot? Hmmm...

Chestnuts roasted by trajeal @ 11/11/2004 09:36 PM EST

Why does the Seed of Chucky commercial say "Brintey SPears does not appear in this movie" ? Are they just being weird? Whats goin on here?

Chestnuts roasted by phunqsauce @ 11/11/2004 09:45 PM EST

There's a bit where Chucky runs her off the road, but of course, it's not really her. I assume her people got in touch with his people and made some demands, though it seems odd to include it in the ads if they were gonna need to put that in there. My assumption? They're hoping for lots of excessively young ticket buyers sneaking in. It is rated R, right? Better be.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 11/11/2004 09:46 PM EST

There was a Britney song in the film, but Spears peeps made them take it out. So to get back they added that sequence into the trailers.

Chestnuts roasted by Paul @ 11/11/2004 09:54 PM EST

O...YOUR...GOD!!!

Thats what I just said when I saw that pic. It's Beautiful...it seems like the kind of thing that virgin women burn when they touch it or something...

Chestnuts roasted by Invader Norbert @ 11/11/2004 10:11 PM EST

matt, you always find ways to top yourself with new articles.
i dont know how you do it.
but now i have something to look forward to this weekend!

Chestnuts roasted by candice @ 11/11/2004 10:29 PM EST

I found out too late that all those flavors are vegan... the stuff is sold out completely now, and I want my ridiculously nasty vegan soda!

Chestnuts roasted by VeganMike @ 11/11/2004 10:33 PM EST

Hey Matt, where did you find this? I checked the two Targets near me with no luck. I also tried to buy it off of Jones' online store this morning, but the site was hosed. I'm officially jealous of you. I may have to resort to paying $60 to get a Holiday Pack off of eBay.

Chestnuts roasted by Scott @ 11/11/2004 11:30 PM EST

Bloody hell, *everyone* is gonna review that crap! And rightfully so. It's AMAZING.

Glad to see that the new job is treating you well, Matt!

Chestnuts roasted by Wes @ 11/12/2004 12:06 AM EST

This was made for X-E. I CANNOT wait.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 11/12/2004 12:17 AM EST

I just threw up a little in my mouth. Although Fruitcake soda could be good...

Chestnuts roasted by Gaidenn @ 11/12/2004 12:19 AM EST

I take it the Thanksgiving Review has been bumped. No matter, it'll be worth it to see you suffer Mashed Potato Soda Pop. Hee hee har har haaar...

Chestnuts roasted by Mars @ 11/12/2004 12:30 AM EST

more important than fearless photog? i think not!

Chestnuts roasted by Diarrhea Dave @ 11/12/2004 12:38 AM EST

mmm, nothing quenches your thirst like mashed potato soda.

Chestnuts roasted by Rachel Cakes @ 11/12/2004 01:00 AM EST

i read on their website the sodas have no carbs or calories. ewww, that means they have no sugar, and that probably means they have artificial sweetener in them. yuech...

Chestnuts roasted by annie_bea @ 11/12/2004 01:13 AM EST

Whoa.

Chestnuts roasted by Evin @ 11/12/2004 02:14 AM EST

I dont feel good

Chestnuts roasted by pulseczar @ 11/12/2004 03:10 AM EST

HELLS YEAH!!!!!!!! Jones Soda kicks ass!

Alright, Matt. Didn't know Jones made something like this. I might hafta go lookin 4 it.

I have an odd story about Jones. One time, a couple of my friends who happened to be roommates took two bottles of that blue bubble gum flavor and put them on their window sill, leaving them there for several months. Eventually, the soda lost its blue color and became clear. I'm wondering why that was. Anybody know?

Chestnuts roasted by Nate @ 11/12/2004 04:58 AM EST

"Let's put family photos on our bottles of turkey and green bean soda."

Chestnuts roasted by springsprite @ 11/12/2004 06:05 AM EST

nothing could taste as bad as TAB cola......not even green bean casserole soda.

Chestnuts roasted by phunqsauce @ 11/12/2004 06:16 AM EST

The horror...
The horror...

Chestnuts roasted by Croww @ 11/12/2004 06:46 AM EST

hey matt, i heard you should chase the mash potato stuff with some coke or maybe a hawaiian roll to get the buttery taste out of your mouth

Chestnuts roasted by big jerm @ 11/12/2004 07:41 AM EST

Hey Phunqsauce - TAB is fab-TAB-u-lous! And its not made with saccharine anymore so it won't kill ya. At least that's what "they" say.

Anywho, Matt, you must take pictures of your reactions to Jones Soda flavors. I'm betting that the green bean casserole one will be the worst. I suggest having some Mylanta or something on hand, too. Best of luck!!

Chestnuts roasted by Traynor @ 11/12/2004 08:37 AM EST

Yay! I can't wait to find out what these taste like without actually having to taste them myself!

Chestnuts roasted by B-Dawg @ 11/12/2004 09:56 AM EST

Long time reader, first time poster... *hee*

Whoa. Turkey pop... the scary thing is, like Jelly Belly jellybeans, Jones tends to be really accurate with their flavors.

Da da dummmm.

(On a side note, has anyone else here tried Buttered Toast flavored Jelly Bellys? They're actually pretty good. =P)

Chestnuts roasted by Indigo X @ 11/12/2004 10:07 AM EST

When I saw that at first, I was like "Oh no, he's shutting it down!" Then I saw the picture and was instantly relieved. I don't know why I always worry about that so much.

I am quite excited to see this. This is the first time in X-E history that I can remember that there was such fanfare for an article. And to say the most important ever...WOW!!! I have a feeling this is going to be the slowest Friday ever

Chestnuts roasted by Y2JB78 @ 11/12/2004 10:09 AM EST

Dear god Matt the stuff you put yr body through for this site. One can only hope Jones has a soda that's Tum's flavored.

Good Luck!!!

Chestnuts roasted by punkrockmom24_7 @ 11/12/2004 10:19 AM EST

What utensils does it include? a bag? a straw? a mask to hide your face in shame? (altho we know you have enough of those, anyone else want to see micheal drinking this stuff?)

Chestnuts roasted by soda fan @ 11/12/2004 10:21 AM EST

it does have a straw, and a toothpick.

Chestnuts roasted by soda fan @ 11/12/2004 10:25 AM EST

Makes living in the UK seem so mundane, they've only just discovered Regular Cola over here!

Keep up the good work Matt!

Chestnuts roasted by kerish_lo@hotmail.co.uk @ 11/12/2004 10:33 AM EST

One of my hidden talents is writing parodies of the Captain Planet theme.

o/Captain Maaaatt he's a hero! Gonna take Jones down to zero! Really odd tasting stuff! He's fighting on X-E's siiide/o

Chestnuts roasted by AngeFaitore @ 11/12/2004 10:49 AM EST

Although this is a man who eats very, very, very old candy, somethetimes I wonder if it's the new stuff that's gonna kill him. "He gave his life for Pop Culture."

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 11/12/2004 11:37 AM EST

Is 'green bean casserole' really a thanksgiving food? I've never had it for Thanksgiving, nor heard of anyone else having it... Could I be that sheltered? Besides, I didn't see a 'stuffing' flavored pop... Not like I'd ever drink the stuff though.

Chestnuts roasted by Hammer @ 11/12/2004 12:10 PM EST

I've never had green bean cassarole for Thanksgiving, but people in TVLand eat it all the time. Also, the people who sell those dried up onion things.

Now every soda/drink maker out there will be hopping on the bandwagon for new soda flavors. What's next, chili soda? Clam chowder soda? Sour cream and onion soda? Ugh, the possibilities are endless.

Chestnuts roasted by trajeal @ 11/12/2004 12:31 PM EST

Matt,

The stuff you do to keep us entertained is simply amazing. Once again, you're the f'ng MANG!!! (no not man, MANG!)

Chestnuts roasted by J-Dog @ 11/12/2004 01:31 PM EST

Matt - You're a star! X-E is linked in Test Pattern again this week on MSNBC, actually twice. Once for the new Pepsi Spice article and again for the Green Ogre Twinkies. Way to go!!

Chestnuts roasted by Traynor @ 11/12/2004 01:36 PM EST

Indigo X: yea, the buttered toast is good. of all the jellybelly's, i hate buttered popcorn. it tastes like feet.
and the bertie bots jellybelly's are really gross. i live right by a jelly belly factory, so i have access to all this crap all the time.

Chestnuts roasted by big jerm @ 11/12/2004 01:39 PM EST

Hammer: Yes, green bean casserole is a real Thanksgiving food. I'm from Minnesota and my family has it every year. It might just be a Midwestern thing, I'm not really sure. IMO, it's pretty good, providing you use the "french style" green beans and add lots of mushroom soup and onions. However, I shudder to think of what it might taste like in soda form. Guess we'll all find out soon enough...

Matt, you have outdone yourself yet again. Good luck in your crazy Jones Soda flavor endeavor, and can't wait to read about it.

Chestnuts roasted by sarahcastic @ 11/12/2004 01:44 PM EST

It must be an act of Bitner.

(Thanks Dave, you took the words right out of my mouth.)

Chestnuts roasted by Rainbowfeet @ 11/12/2004 01:54 PM EST

Normally Jones sodas kick ass.. Not quite sure about some of these flavours though! Can't wait to read the article Matt!

Chestnuts roasted by Moparman @ 11/12/2004 02:38 PM EST

I think drinking that Fruity Bubblegum Hi-C you found that was like 10 years old and caroded the can would be safer to drink than greenbean casserole soda. As you can tell I really have a hatred for green beans. Well, actually they were pretty good mixed with mashed potatoes or applesauce (YES APPLESAUCE, OK???!!!! I SWEAR IT WAS PRETTY GOOD!!!!!!)

Chestnuts roasted by phunqsauce @ 11/12/2004 02:53 PM EST

I almost fainted when I saw the picture. I've been wondering about those things for weeks.

Am I the only person that likes buttered popcorn Jelly Bellies? Everyone else I know hates them, even on this board : I guess that wouldn't be a bad thing, just means more for me.

Chestnuts roasted by Mara @ 11/12/2004 03:15 PM EST

hmm...my displeased smiley didn't work. Oh well.

Chestnuts roasted by Mara @ 11/12/2004 03:22 PM EST

No Mara, I *love* the buttered popcorn Jelly Bellies! They are my favorite along with cinnamon, licorish, grapefruit, and watermelon (purely for the two coloredness)

Chestnuts roasted by B-Dawg @ 11/12/2004 04:06 PM EST

I also like the buttered popcorn jelly beans so you're not alone.

Chestnuts roasted by J-Dog @ 11/12/2004 04:23 PM EST

No. No! Yes. I want see the special included utensils put to work. This even beats out that suspect pine Scottish ale I bought us one Christmas (surprisingly, it didn't taste like a car freshener).

I thought that Buttered Popcorn Jelly Bellies wre bad --- 'til curiosity got the better of me and I tried the Harry Potter Booger flavour. I think I spent the better part of a minute rinsing and spitting.

Chestnuts roasted by Molten @ 11/12/2004 06:21 PM EST

Not to dwell from the subject but I got a new computer at work and had to get my favorites list filled in manually. To find this site I used the phrase "giant ape juice" on yahoo. Just thought I'd let Matt know we are now the #1 hit for Giant ape juice. Took long enough.

Chestnuts roasted by Gozer @ 11/12/2004 06:41 PM EST

We need to work on Google for Giant Ape Juice. Can't wait to hear the results of Jones goodness if you're still alive to tell it.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt(#2?) @ 11/12/2004 07:16 PM EST

Haha awesome I can't wait for the article. Try not to puke.

Chestnuts roasted by Meatwad @ 11/12/2004 07:37 PM EST

i demand you send me new pants, because i just crapped mine

Chestnuts roasted by urquidez tastes like snozzberries @ 11/12/2004 09:33 PM EST

Giant Ape Juice? Really? Giant Ape Juice? I just googled Giant Ape Juice and unfortunately, we were #2 for the search of Giant Ape Juice. Yes, I said Giant Ape Juice. What's wrong with Giant Ape Juice?
Hee!

Chestnuts roasted by Giant Ape Juice @ 11/12/2004 09:46 PM EST

Does anyone else like the show Drawn Together??? I thought it would suck but I kinda liked it. It's a hell of a lot better than that fuckin' Kid Notorious show they tried to pair up with South Park.

Chestnuts roasted by phunqsauce @ 11/12/2004 10:36 PM EST

I caught Drawn Together for the first time last night, after the new South Park (which was...just wrong) and even though I was hoping to like it, I found it to be awful. Not just awful, but shitty and unfunny and not a very good parody of Real World or a single one of the cartoon genres they were trying to lampoon. Not even Ace Carolla could save it; I tuned out after 12 minutes. Kid Notorious was similarly terrible, but it had Niecy Nash AND Slash, so it wasn't quite as irredeemable.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 11/13/2004 12:29 AM EST

Drawn Together's pretty bad. It must be the easiest thing in the world to write scripts for, though. "Hey, this part needs to be funny--let's put in a penis again!"

Chestnuts roasted by Mars @ 11/13/2004 12:40 AM EST

Where's the Pumpkin Pie with Whipped Cream soda?!?! What's more Thanksgiving than that?

Chestnuts roasted by Shonuf1 @ 11/13/2004 01:37 AM EST

I came rushing home from work to read this article and it hasn't even posted yet! I looked forward to it all day! MATT, WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME!!

Chestnuts roasted by Gaidenn @ 11/13/2004 01:50 AM EST

Well, well, well, Matty-boy. Looks like you just how get all the vegans to come to your site. Or two of the vegans. Yea! Two!

Chestnuts roasted by Tougi @ 11/13/2004 02:23 AM EST

Come on.. nothing's more important than the green bamboo peanut, is it... Matt? Is it?!

Chestnuts roasted by Efbeie @ 11/13/2004 03:53 AM EST

If Im going to kill myself with holiday flavored sodas, Im going to take my chances with the pine flavored Pepsi. I commend you on your willingness to drink carbonated turkey, though I really hope you've thought this through. Wake me up when Jones markets Kwanzaa Cola.

Chestnuts roasted by pulseczar @ 11/13/2004 06:05 AM EST

Wow. That stuff looks vile. Matt is going to drink it!!!

Chestnuts roasted by AngeFaitore @ 11/13/2004 09:23 AM EST

Geez, I could have used these that Thanksgiving when my jaw was wired shut....

Chestnuts roasted by Jillybeann @ 11/13/2004 12:39 PM EST

holy dog shit....ive been pissed off ever since they stopped selling jones at the store in my town

Chestnuts roasted by sexynigelthepharoahwizard @ 11/13/2004 01:48 PM EST

God damn though what kind of evil genius would come up with a turkey flavoured pop?

Chestnuts roasted by sexynigelthepharoahwizard @ 11/13/2004 01:49 PM EST

and to think all of us canuckle heads get to miss such great holiday cheer. seeing as how we had t-giving back in october. i wonder if this is a bad thing??

Chestnuts roasted by Gene @ 11/13/2004 02:48 PM EST

Giant Ape Juice, only from the freshest Giant Apes. Direct from the Giant Ape vinyards in a secluded part of the Napa Valley, hand-picked and gently washed. The only cruelty-free Giant Ape bottling plant in the
Western Hemisphere. Try it straight up with a twist of pork rind.

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 11/13/2004 03:35 PM EST

Oh dear god. I so have to try that stuff this year!

Chestnuts roasted by Komichi @ 11/13/2004 04:12 PM EST

i cant wait to read this article! PLEASE take shots of your reaction. i think it would be hilaaaarious (brian from family guy style). Keep up the good work!!

Chestnuts roasted by VolklMonkey @ 11/13/2004 05:55 PM EST

Once upon a time there lived a Giant Ape Juice right across the street from the Giant Ape Juice factory. Then one foggy Christmas Eve, Giant Ape juice came to say all your Giant Ape Juice are belong to us at the Giant Ape Juice aka North Pole. Yea, though we walk through the valley of darkness.. we shall fear no Walmart for Giant Ape Juice art with us. Thy Giant Ape Juice as thy staff and Barnum and Bailey as shepards. Low and behold the Giant Ape Juice cometh like Ozzfest from hell.

The End.

PS: Giant Ape Juice

Chestnuts roasted by Matt(#2?) @ 11/13/2004 06:40 PM EST

People don't like real fruit cake, why would they want it in drink form???

Chestnuts roasted by SuperStar @ 11/13/2004 07:22 PM EST

So... who's seen Seed of Chucky? I haven't gotten out to see it yet, but I find it impossible to believe that no one who reads X-E has a review for us!

Chestnuts roasted by VeganMike @ 11/13/2004 10:31 PM EST

Pumpkin Pie w/ Whipped Cream soda sounds kinda good. Hmmm...

Chestnuts roasted by trajeal @ 11/13/2004 10:38 PM EST

Look on the bright side, Matt. Something will now replace Crystal Pepsi and Pepsi Blue as the worst tasting sodas of all time.

If you survive, review "Mac and Me."

Chestnuts roasted by A-wel Cruiz @ 11/13/2004 11:16 PM EST

I don't get it. My brain is telling me "no," but my heart is screaming out "yes!" It's like forbidden dance. I must try this holiday inspired Jones Soda.

Chestnuts roasted by Erin @ 11/13/2004 11:29 PM EST

alright, everyone hate me.......

i will splatter my existance within what is considered reality

Chestnuts roasted by phunqsauce @ 11/13/2004 11:56 PM EST

Oh LORD! I WANT THEM!

I hate living in Canada. We never get the good stuff!

Chestnuts roasted by Isca @ 11/14/2004 12:48 AM EST

I used to work at Panera Bread, and we sold this crap.Chochlate soda any one?Oh dear lord that was an abmoination to the taste buds.Probably those will be the best flavors ever LOL, enjoy!

Chestnuts roasted by Orchalcyon @ 11/14/2004 01:33 AM EST

Pepsi should pay you a lil bit because the blurb here on holiday spice seems to have inspired many cackers to run out and try it; myself being one of said cackers.

Chestnuts roasted by beauxreigard st dookchute @ 11/14/2004 05:27 AM EST

Can someone send me some of that good ole Holiday Spice Pepsi?

The commissaries suck over here in Germany. And don't get me started on the PX...we probably won't get GTA: San Andreas or Smackdown vs Raw until March or so...

Guess that means next Christmas I'll get GT4 and Metal Gear Solid 3.

Semper Fi,
Erik Majorwitz

Chestnuts roasted by EMajorwitz @ 11/14/2004 06:44 AM EST

Wow, I tip my hat to you man if you're going to drink that crap. Good luck.

Chestnuts roasted by Lauren @ 11/14/2004 07:41 AM EST

Matt-OK, the weekend's just about over, and I don't see any new article yet. R U pullin our leg!?!

Chestnuts roasted by Nate @ 11/14/2004 08:05 AM EST

Dont rush the man .... it takes a special kind of guy to drink those monsterous concoctions. He's obviously just building up the tension ... and courage.
I have faith in Matt.

Chestnuts roasted by Mark @ 11/14/2004 12:27 PM EST

He probably drank the green bean cassarole one is is now in the hospital, geting his stomach pumped. We wish you well, Matt! Don't choke on that charcoal tasting stuff they make you drink. You are a true man among webhounds.

Chestnuts roasted by trajeal @ 11/14/2004 01:45 PM EST

He's dead, Jim.

Chestnuts roasted by "MR. GAME & WATCH" @ 11/14/2004 02:05 PM EST

'Twas nice knowing him. Such a bold soul for trying to drink those foul liquids.

Chestnuts roasted by Hammer @ 11/14/2004 03:36 PM EST

Poor old Matt..... Letting his mouth write cheques that his ass can't cash!

I'm kidding really, I appreciate all the hours of free entertainment Matt has bestowed upon us.

Chestnuts roasted by Paul B. @ 11/14/2004 03:36 PM EST

OK, a few things:

- Everybody keeps referring to these as "sodas" - they are actually juices, there isn't any carbonation. Jones makes juices and sodas.

- Crystal Pepsi was awesome. Am I the only one that really liked it?

- I really hope Matt didn't die drinking this stuff. That would be like if ODB died or something. Oh wait. Nevermind.

Chestnuts roasted by Aaron @ 11/14/2004 04:50 PM EST

The Chia Plot! The Final Instalment! That's the most important, and we still ain't seen it yet. So my Evil Pony is out to get ya. Click on me name!

Chestnuts roasted by eminentfreakthewellinformed @ 11/16/2004 06:30 AM EST

Erik, I tried the Pepsi Spice, and it's... interesting.

I wonder how well bottles of this would survive a trip to Germany?

Chestnuts roasted by yzziefrog @ 11/16/2004 11:15 AM EST

Being British, i'm bummed i didn't hear about the great drinks earlier but looking to the future i'm hoping to hear how the advent calendar pans out, i mean last year's had me on the edge of my seat only to be robbed of a conclusion. Matt, you're a star but come on get your act together and you can share my sweet sweet vodka, it has bubbles in it!!!!

Chestnuts roasted by Addicted to photog @ 11/16/2004 09:50 PM EST

I loved Crystal Pepsi, too.

Chestnuts roasted by MasterGakke @ 11/20/2004 02:10 AM EST