01/08/2004 Entry: "Bag O' Crap Reader Mail!"

Wow, there's been a huge response to the Bag O' Crap article. I wasn't really sure about doing this one at first, so I guess the lesson to be learned is...always trust the Bag O' Crap. The next article is a big one, and should be up no later than Friday morning. Meanwhile, a lot of people have either shared their memories or identified items from the BAG in the previous comments section. I think we've just about determined the origin of everything in the bag. Didn't think that was possible. Here's a bunch of e-mails I've gotten today that help shed more light on the 49 relics...

Chris: "Love your site.  Just wanted to tell you what that tiger thing you found in your “bag o crap” was.  I remember having one.  It’s actually meant to be put in a 2 liter bottle of water and it dives up and down as you flip the bottle around.  I don’t remember the exact instructions as to how to operate this thing, but that’s definitely what it’s for.  Completely useless.  Anyway, keep up the great work.  I go to your site every day, and I LOVE it."

Russell:"If memory serves….The little red diver guy is a toy that somehow rises and falls in water.  I could swear that you stuck him in a soda bottle… and possibly put soap on him?  And then when you squeezed the bottle he’d rise.. and when you released he’d fall. Perhaps a thorough search of your own on google will do better than mine and find the secret of this guy.  Anyway.. thought you’d like the info."

Chris: "I believe I can shed some light on to your Burger King Aladdin Thing. It is a fortune telling device.  You apply the stickers on all of the different sides of the, and spin the top.  Whatever side you land on is your fortune.  Here is the cool part, if you rub your finger over the little red part, it will "magically" reveal what is in your future. I had one of these, except mine was purple. "

Jem: "Oh, and the scientific name for the tiger doodad that goes up and down in a 2L soda bottle is a "Cartesian Diver". This is one of the experiments Boy Scouts must do to earn their Chemistry Merit Badge."

Tony: "I was born in 1982, and I remember getting a NEW Garfield Pencil Topper at some point, I think it was out of a cereal box. Mine was orange. Just writing in to say that you are correct, they MUST have had a second run of these things AFTER 1981 because I had one!!!"

Dan: "amazingly, i remember this particular toy, and the seconds of fun it provided.  you would hold the wider part of the launcher between your index finger and thumb; the tip of the launcher was then inserted into the notch in the disc; using the index finger of your other hand, pull back on the disc and woohoo! away your flying disc goes.  i cannot be sure, but from the color of the disc in the picture it appears that you are the lucky owner of a glow in the dark flying disc."

Jay: "Hey, love the site. Great article on the cereal premiums and candies. As for Sippers six pak, they still make em, only now, manufacturer is Albert's instead of R.L. Albert and Son. Here they are."

Michael: "The "Sea Diver Guy" in the Bag O' Crap IS an astronaut. While it's probably a generic figure associated with LOTS of cheap space toys, I had four of them included in a Kmart-purchased giant plastic multistage rocket back in about 1976 or so. The figures were red, white, and blue...and I got two white ones. My daughter has a large bag of my old army men and whatnot, so I'll have to root through and see if any survived."

Jessie: "I really hate to burst your bubble, but #35 isn't a tyrannosaurus,
although I do have to admit that it looks like one. It's a type of hadrosaur (commonly known as the duck-billed dinosaurs) called a Corythosaurus.  That means helmet lizard, and the thing on top of its head is a bony crest for... well, no one really knows.  But it's
there. Sadly, you didn't get a terrible meat-eater.  You got a placid herbivore who looks like a carnivore. Yes, I am the biggest geek ever."

Camden: "Actually the little dinosaur with a mohawk is a hadrosaur, a type of duck-billed dinosaur with a large flat bone ridge on the top of it's head."

Chestnuts roasted by Armagideon Time @ 01/08/2004 03:09 AM EST

For the rekkid, 1st post...woohoo. 2nd post...woopdee doo. Big whoopdee doo....:S

Chestnuts roasted by Armagideon Time @ 01/08/2004 03:10 AM EST

Matt... I LOVED the Bag O' Crap article, you should seriously consider doing more along these lines, maybe not forty-nine each time, I'm sure that wasn't easy, but all the work you put in really came through. Keep it up man.

Chestnuts roasted by The Dude @ 01/08/2004 08:16 AM EST

great article Matt. I'm glad to see the awesome response you got for it. I hope you continue to do things like that. Maybe not 49 next time around, but deffinately a cool article.

Chestnuts roasted by chad @ 01/08/2004 08:35 AM EST

Funny I have one of those "Astronaut" guys too, but I always thought he was part of a cleanup crew at a nuclear disaster, and the thing he was holding was a geiger counter. How wrong I've been. Now the guy with the metal detector that stands next to him is laughing.(he stands right next to the astronaut)

Chestnuts roasted by Trippy the 8th Dwarf @ 01/08/2004 10:21 AM EST

I was wondering about that T-Rex/hardosaur thing. I was pretty sure it wasn't a T-resx, but didn't have the ambition to actually look up what it was supposed to be.

I'm obsessed w/ finding out what that purple bird thing is, though.

Chestnuts roasted by trajeal @ 01/08/2004 10:34 AM EST

I already posted what those two things were, yesterday morning. I really don't think anyone ever reads all the posts. To quote myself though: As for the "Mohawk Dinosaur"... it just might be a poorly represented Corythosaurus, which had the mohawk on top of their heads and a similar body shape as the T-Rex. The "??????? Purple Figurine" is a Fringie space alien.

Chestnuts roasted by Tadashi @ 01/08/2004 11:47 AM EST

Oh my god! I'm famous!

Chestnuts roasted by Jessie @ 01/08/2004 01:07 PM EST

I read all the posts most of the time. Sometimes some posts (mine included) get too long and I lose concentration. The lovely wonders of adult ADD, I guess. I bet Gabby reads through them all. She's studious like that. She's also an evil king...not sure how she manages it all :)
Eh, I'm sick today so just ignore my ramblings.

Chestnuts roasted by Killer Duck @ 01/08/2004 01:40 PM EST

Whoa diving Tony the Tiger! *flashback* Many hours of bottle squeezing ensue.

Chestnuts roasted by sweven @ 01/08/2004 01:43 PM EST

Duck, that is what minions are for. You should get some, they are quite useful. And if they turn out to be incompetent, you just have your other minions obliterate them. The threat of destruction helps keep everyone in line at office parties.

Chestnuts roasted by Gabbylicious @ 01/08/2004 02:16 PM EST

Best source for quick minions: that little coin machine Marvin the Martian used in that one Bugs Bunny cartoon. Advantage: quick deployment with a spritz of water. Disadvantage: ain't too bright.

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 01/08/2004 02:30 PM EST

Minions, eh? I shall create then with Play Doh and they will do my bidding. I already have a ton of little Mega Blok knights...some dragaons too...
My dog won't be my minion. I am his favorite chew toy.
Nah I can't be a ruler. I can't even decide what to make for dinner.

Chestnuts roasted by Killer Duck @ 01/08/2004 04:40 PM EST

As Tadashi mentioned, the Corythosaurus looks a lot like a Tyrannosaurus. In fact, I had several of the tyrannosaurs as a kid in eraser format. It looks like someone just added a crest to the original mold and hoped no one would notice. But it's pretty obvious--the front limbs of all hadrosaurs are well-developed, and they don't have high-vaulted skulls and pointy teeth.

I think that the figure is really the dinosaur equivalent of a wolf in sheep's clothing. No plant-eater would ever expect a Corythosaurus to be dangerous.

Chestnuts roasted by Sean @ 01/08/2004 04:42 PM EST

Cat, the other white meat. =^..^=

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 01/08/2004 05:08 PM EST

where the hell is the Heinz ketchup bottle transformer?

Chestnuts roasted by zfcvbad @ 01/08/2004 05:41 PM EST

Dunno about ketchup but I have a Transformer (or Go Bot thing) that is a scorpion. It's one of the dumbest I have seen because it has tracks like a tank. Tanks are good. Scorpion tanks would be good. This thing is ungood. Except that it is mostly die-cast metal. Metal is also good.

Chestnuts roasted by Killer Duck @ 01/08/2004 06:00 PM EST

GoBot named Skorp. Decent, not great.

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 01/08/2004 06:02 PM EST

Yay...I got my car registration and tags in the mail today!

O_o...0_O...o_0

Chestnuts roasted by heeloyd @ 01/08/2004 07:36 PM EST

Whee, 20th post! If this was Star Wars, I would be a special edition! My god, that was a lame joke. I am so sorry.
Anyway, I too remember the Garfield smiling things. I had, like, fifty of them, so I know they were re-released in later years.
Loved the article!

Chestnuts roasted by Kodo @ 01/08/2004 09:02 PM EST

Hey! The site with the Six Packs had Amazin Fruit! Check it out:

http://www.eastcoastconfections.com/detail.php?itemID=502&cat1=6&cat2=11

Chestnuts roasted by A-Train @ 01/08/2004 09:33 PM EST

heeloyd will be driving, everyone stay off the sidewalks!
Go Bots suck. My brother had that big white walky thing that the good go bots lived in. It had this red clear window you'd put the go bots in front of to see if they were good or bad. Plus it had a flashing light in it's skull. My least favorite of all the go bosts (besides Leader 1) was Cy-Kill. His front wheel had to come off to make him a robot...dumb. On the TV show it would disappear like a miracle. Oh and another dumb one was Scooter. And the kid who rode him. Oh hell they ALL sucked, let's not kid ourselves. The only time I liked the go bots in any way was when I saw them raping Leader 1.

Chestnuts roasted by Killer Duck @ 01/08/2004 10:00 PM EST

The little astronaut/ deep sea diver guy apprently has many many realtives. They were part of those generic bags of plastic figurines you'd find in the grocery store ( or as the case with the small army I assembled in younger years, the navy commissary) There were space variations, fantasy variations, indians/cowboy versions.Always lead to intresting combinations at play time.

Chestnuts roasted by Chris g @ 01/08/2004 10:05 PM EST

OK did no one else ask this? I can't sleep without knowing...WHAT WAS THE 50TH PIECE OF CRAP??? The one not worth writing about????? I MUST KNOW, MATT!!!!!!!

Chestnuts roasted by medevac @ 01/08/2004 10:10 PM EST

AHA I found it on yesterday's blog

Chestnuts roasted by medevac @ 01/08/2004 10:16 PM EST

dont clear the sidewalks just yet...I still dont have my license XD

yes i am almost 20 with no drivers license...

Chestnuts roasted by heeloyd @ 01/08/2004 11:38 PM EST

OH shit i sware ive seen the purple chicken has been in a video game.... i rember that like wendys or some fast food place did a promotion with nintendo when N64 came out...?

Chestnuts roasted by Jared @ 01/08/2004 11:47 PM EST

In the name of all that is '80s, I summon...THE CHICKEN-THING!

http://home.iprimus.com.au/gking/Nuttinge.gif

You can find out more about this fellow here: http://home.iprimus.com.au/gking/Fringies.htm

Chestnuts roasted by JC @ 01/09/2004 12:50 AM EST

Heeloyd, my brother is going to be 28 this year and hasn't got his license so don't feel too bad.
Ya know, back when the mad cow shit was going on over in Great Britain and other places in Europe I made this giant mural on my wall with plastic army guys, astronauts, cowboys, indians, farm animals, everything that was cheap plastic and sold for $2 at WalMart. I painted the astronauts, farm animals and others white with black spots, threw in some glowy aliens, and made some mutants with hot glue and plastic body parts then painted them cow spotty. I had the cow spotties on one part and army guys on another all up on the wall in luxurious 3-D and titled it "Birth of Mad Cow Disease". I ripped most of it down last year because I was pissed at something or other. I wish it was still there. Curse my bad temper!

Chestnuts roasted by Killer Duck @ 01/09/2004 01:28 AM EST

I am not artistic and all my arty projects come out looking like crap. I tried painting once, that looked no good. But I am not talking about art, I am talking about plastic human figurines and about the bext time I had with them ever. We were at our friend's cabin and we were shooting them with the pellet gun. Or trying to shoot them, it was hard work before they were tiny and we had no skills. Eventually we threw them all in the fire pit and starting a fire, because we were about 12 years old and very smart. Those fumes were gross, but the result was a completely useless glob of green rubber. Oh, and our friend's kid sister peed the bed and had urine all over the back of her white pyjamas. It was gross.

Chestnuts roasted by Gabbylicious @ 01/09/2004 03:03 AM EST

Curse your temper! I want to see the mad cow mural! XD

I lose my temper at times as well and then smash/break/destroy/etc... whatever crosses my path. ^_^

Chestnuts roasted by heeloyd @ 01/09/2004 03:17 AM EST

Matt, MTV will be showing an episode of True Life about young people renting summer homes on the Jersey Shore at 12pm Eastern time today. I have not seen it, but going by your past articles I figured you might be interested.

Chestnuts roasted by Dr. Fad @ 01/09/2004 03:19 AM EST

Could be interesting. My family used to rent a house every summer in Long Beach Island. One year, the house became infested with what the exterminator referred to as "flying termites." We tried to make the best of it, but upon saturating the hole they were coming in from with bug spray, we were met by no less than half a million spray-groggy termites that were literally ankle high on the living room floor.

So we went home. Didn't even get to cash my points in at the one casino arcade on the island. No Wizard of Odds either, baby.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 01/09/2004 03:27 AM EST

I laugh at the little plastic indian guys. When "Disney's" Pocahontas came out, I would wallk through Wally-World's toy aisle and point at the merchandise and laugh like a gassed hyena. People would stare, of course, then a murmur, " hey, he's native american, he might know something we don't. " Plastic indians are cool. I used to melt them last.

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 01/09/2004 11:33 AM EST

Never melt plastic indians. Put them in the cupboard.
... they might just come to life.

Chestnuts roasted by Tadashi @ 01/09/2004 12:23 PM EST

Tadashi, I remember in 5th grade we had to read indian in the cupboard for class, and i hated that damn book. i think it was around the same time that movie came out. And the same time Chocodiles were in their prime. Coincidence???

Chestnuts roasted by A-Train @ 01/10/2004 01:01 AM EST

Indian In The Cupboard in 5th grade? You guys musta been retahhhded. Weze be reedin that in tha thurd graad! No seriously... horrible book.

Chestnuts roasted by Tadashi @ 01/10/2004 04:00 AM EST

That gum on there... It's probably not as old as you think. What you've got there is foreign gum. I remember getting some on vacation in the mid 80's or so on some 3rd world island. And pretty much everything on they sell on those islands looks like its from the 30's. Even brand new coke in glass bottles, and like regular soap comes in tins and stuff. Come to think of it you'd have a field day there. Would be a good vacation spot to ya, a real throw back! Anyway, enjoy your gum, it's a good 15 years fresh.

Chestnuts roasted by Blossom @ 01/10/2004 09:04 AM EST

Gum from the 80's is still old gum. I mean it's like 2004 now or something. It only serves to prove Matt's superhuman abilities-to be able to eat aged gum and NADs.

Chestnuts roasted by Killer Duck @ 01/10/2004 01:30 PM EST

I loved when Leader 1 got raped too. Anyone know where to find that video?

Chestnuts roasted by Spiffy McKracken @ 01/10/2004 02:12 PM EST

Leader 1 gets it in the end...here's a link to the page with the link to the download. I didn't download it today because I am using a damned dial up connection but hopefully it is still there for your viewing pleasure:
http://www.x-entertainment.com/updates/entries/archives/00000197.html

Chestnuts roasted by Killer Duck @ 01/14/2004 12:26 AM EST

"Bag O'Crap" was absolutely the best thing I've read on X-E. Really good. I don't know if it would be foolhardy to try and repeat its glories.

The future of literature!

HONESTLY.

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