REPLIES: 62 comments
Whoo! First post, maybe. Truthfully i have nothing to say about Hulk or strawberry shortcake, but I got this in my mail today and some of you might be interested.
Do you remember all those great action cartoons of the '80's?
Titles such as "G.I. Joe", "Thundercats" and "Masters of the
Universe" instantly come to mind. There was one, however, that
arguably surpassed all others with its innovative concept of
machines changing shape to become gigantic warriors. Of course,
I'm referring to "Transformers".
There was an animated film created quite a few years ago that
featured the characters of the popular cartoon in a full-length
big-screen picture. It seems that Optimus Prime and the rest
of the "Transformer" crew will be hitting the box office once
again with a new live action/CGI production in the works.
Here is what producer Tom DeSanto had to say about the upcoming
project: "The plan with the movie is that it will combine live
action with CGI. I think it's going to be something the
audience has never seen before. In all the years of movie-
making, I don't think the image of a truck transforming into
a 20-foot tall robot has ever been captured on screen."
The film will also aim to pay homage to 1980s movies and create
a sense of wonder that Hollywood seems to have lost over the
years.
If they do it right and don't make it all cheesy, it might be pretty cool
Chestnuts roasted by Stacey @ 09/05/2003 12:10 AM EST
Wow.
Just .. wow.
Chestnuts roasted by Marc @ 09/05/2003 12:13 AM EST
ohhhhh fuuuuudge. only hulk didn't say "fudge."
That made my day. Thanks.
Chestnuts roasted by Matt (#2?) @ 09/05/2003 12:23 AM EST
Randomness, thy name be Matt Caracappa.
Chestnuts roasted by "Mean Offscreen Wizard. In a Gandolf the Grey way or a Radagast the Brown way?" @ 09/05/2003 12:29 AM EST
I need some of what your smoking. then again, ain't much on t.v. tonight anyway, so i could see how this would happen.
Chestnuts roasted by sweepthelegjohhny @ 09/05/2003 01:15 AM EST
That was so touching :'(
Chestnuts roasted by pikachulover @ 09/05/2003 01:40 AM EST
I feel Hulk's pain. Strawberry Shortcake is a slut. I'd wonder if she's going to be disappointed when she discovers the Silver Surfer has no genitals, but since they're both balls and technically can't have sex anyway I suppose it doesn't matter.
Chestnuts roasted by Hellpop! @ 09/05/2003 01:50 AM EST
Classic. They'll be reading that one in 9th grade english classes a few years down the road.
Chestnuts roasted by Capt. Cid @ 09/05/2003 02:38 AM EST
Coke pulls toy decorated with swastikas
http://www.ajc.com/business/content/business/coke/0403/30robot.html?urac=n&urvf=10627149069170.5423876955300921
Chestnuts roasted by Pepsi @ 09/05/2003 03:44 AM EST
well...that was different. But thats what makes this site so great!! You never know what will be next!
I dont understand why Hulks Ball is yellow? Shouldnt it be green. Hulk think so. I think that's why she left him...cause hes not green.
I ate some key lime sherbet today and it was green. Green is greeny green greenness of green!!! *Passes out*
Chestnuts roasted by heeloyd @ 09/05/2003 03:57 AM EST
"Well...remember the Silver Surfer?"
"HULK NOT HAPPY"
Thanks Matt. That was frickin' awesome.
Chestnuts roasted by Paul @ 09/05/2003 05:59 AM EST
Jeez. Matt, I think you've found your mojo again. Been a great week on X-E.
Chestnuts roasted by Electron @ 09/05/2003 09:46 AM EST
:::standing ovation::::
Chestnuts roasted by saint matthew @ 09/05/2003 10:47 AM EST
Speaking of "Oh, Fuuuuuuudge" - what is this mess I heard yesterday about Flick from A Christmas Story becoming a filthy movie star?!
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0777432/
Lord, how the mighty hath fallen.
Chestnuts roasted by Master H @ 09/05/2003 12:12 PM EST
'Flick', a movie star? Hm, well speaking of the fallen, it can't top the mystery of 'Judy Winslow' (the mysterious 3rd sister from family matters who was wiped from existence by a...temporal phenomena or something). Apparently now she's a porn star. hm....weirdness.
Chestnuts roasted by sharkie @ 09/05/2003 12:35 PM EST
I did the search on imdb, and it's true Judy Winslow is a porn star.
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0289340/
Chestnuts roasted by CalmingEffect @ 09/05/2003 01:55 PM EST
Ms. Shortcake seems to be taking the whole thing a lot better than Hulk. But indeed, Matt, a slobberknocker of a week.
Chestnuts roasted by Nachokhaki @ 09/05/2003 02:06 PM EST
Hey Matt, if you want more people to come to the blog, give the people what they want. Remember a certain picture oriented Master of the Universe contest and how we never got to see the rest of the story?
Chestnuts roasted by Rono @ 09/05/2003 03:58 PM EST
:*( Guilty as charged. I DO have them all saved in a very specific folder. I'll make a page with all of the entries, but it's gonna have to be quick and dirty as there's like 100+ entries.
Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 09/05/2003 04:01 PM EST
Wow, this little love story had it all, magic, love, balls...
This story had bigger balls than the lord of the ring!
Chestnuts roasted by Tin Bromide @ 09/05/2003 04:07 PM EST
What a whore. How typical of Shortcake.
Chestnuts roasted by Thomas @ 09/05/2003 05:32 PM EST
Strawberry Shortcake is not a 'slut'. She doesn't even have a cunt. I should know, I checked.
Chestnuts roasted by skiwlz @ 09/05/2003 05:35 PM EST
Thats fantastic!
Chestnuts roasted by Tessie @ 09/05/2003 05:54 PM EST
Don't pretend like you didn't look either.
Chestnuts roasted by skiwlz @ 09/05/2003 06:05 PM EST
Thanks Matt! I'm looking forward to it. And believe me, if there's 100, we're going to be very forgiving of stylisitic points of how you put them out. Thanks for listening to your fans! We love you! Er... we love you in a very platonic (or is it plutonic) way.
Thanks again, I'm really looking forward to it.
Long live X-E!
Chestnuts roasted by Rono @ 09/05/2003 06:57 PM EST
I could wake up to find Santa Claus ballroom dancing with Unicron on top of a pile of old Sonic the Hedgehog comics books and still think to myself, "Damn, that ball thing with Hulk and Shortcake was pretty messed up."
Chestnuts roasted by King Sprocket @ 09/05/2003 08:06 PM EST
That was beautiful.
Chestnuts roasted by Melanie @ 09/05/2003 08:24 PM EST
Hulk want see Photog...Hulk not smash! Photog not have action figure like Hulk. Hulk sad for Photog.
Chestnuts roasted by Bigshow71 @ 09/05/2003 08:45 PM EST
Judy Winslow!? My Family Matters is a bit fuzzy, but out of the kids I remember Eddie and Laura; there was a Little Richie too, I believe. Was this Rich hatched by Mom Harriet? Was Black Debutante Judy a small child or a big one? Did they ever give any reason on the show why she disappeared; like being sold to gypsies or running away like a puppy? Like Reagan I just don't recall...
Chestnuts roasted by Krappy Kat @ 09/05/2003 08:48 PM EST
I think the real reason SS wanted to separate was Hulks anger issues. ms. shortcake probably doesn't deal too well with that..I mean come on, she knows no anger.
anyway..matt, I have heard that they put Saved By The Bell out on some DVDs so that people could enjoy the show and its hilarious antics FOREVER (or until the DVD system is replaced). either way..something to write about!! *hint hint*
Chestnuts roasted by candice @ 09/05/2003 09:27 PM EST
Ok...here's where I reveal I know way too freakin much about Family Matters, one of the worst shows of all time.
The reason given for Judy Winslow (who was the youngest Winslow child) being written out of the show was that she was at boarding school. I think they mentioned that in one episode, and then never mentioned her again.
Another star we mau all recall who ended up in porn was Stephen Geoffreys, who played Evil Ed in Fright Night. Not content to do just porn, he now does GAY porn.
How embarassing must it be to have alongside your mainstream credits on IMDB such titles as Butt Blazer and Halfway House Hunks?
Chestnuts roasted by Hellpop! @ 09/05/2003 09:48 PM EST
mmmmkay then....
Chestnuts roasted by xen @ 09/05/2003 10:05 PM EST
Sure, they're just balls, but they could always go for a "roll" in the hay... ahahaha... ahahaha... no? Sorry.
Anyways, Hulk just wanted Shortcake because she's got her hottie friends with her.
That was, officially, the most messed up reply I have ever left in this blog.
Chestnuts roasted by freakachu @ 09/05/2003 10:24 PM EST
Who remember's Bebop and Rocksteady's dirty little theme song?! Someone should.. if you're curious, watch some of the episodes.. almost 100% of the time, when Shredder and his goons are up to no good (they always are) you'll hear a "Bum-bump-buh-bo-bo-bu-buh-bo." Look for it, sheer classicness.
Chestnuts roasted by Daily Diver @ 09/05/2003 10:25 PM EST
Ok, first of all, I'm glad you got your groove back, Matt. The Wendy's article today was hilarious. I may even try that potatoe sometime. (The chilli would be more tempting if it didn't look so scary in that picture...)
All I can say on the blog is....um, Matt, you are disturbed. But we all like you anyway. ; 0 )
Chestnuts roasted by starwenn @ 09/05/2003 10:32 PM EST
Wow. Every once in a great while something comes along that makes me wonder what the hell I just saw. This would be one of those things. Of course, every episode of Captain Planet I've seen in the past few years also got this reaction from me, so take it as you will. Wow.
Chestnuts roasted by Elliott @ 09/05/2003 11:46 PM EST
EEEE! Photog still living strong! Glad to see it didn't die during my ban. I NEVER would have expected the article to end like that. A+, you get a WUL for that, Matt. Matt= teh coolness. Also, I think I saw in in a Circuit City here in Maryland. I was too scared to talk to you. Matt, was that you, or do you have a twin?
Chestnuts roasted by Bansheex @ 09/05/2003 11:51 PM EST
Damn, that Strawberry Shortcake is a sweet piece of ass. Good work, Hulk.
Chestnuts roasted by Nate-o-mack @ 09/06/2003 12:20 AM EST
i sure didn't expect that ending either.
Shortcake left Hulk cuz she's a spoiled little dessert punk who is going to shamelessly move from one over-sized ball to the next.
plus, she couldn't handle his girth.
Chestnuts roasted by zann @ 09/06/2003 12:54 AM EST
Oh Man you are so funny!!! Can I like Have your children?!?!?!
I read this site almost daily, It cheers me up so much and you're cute to boot!
Chestnuts roasted by Allie @ 09/06/2003 03:18 AM EST
Grapemellon Juicyfruit?
Chestnuts roasted by Daily Diver @ 09/06/2003 04:11 AM EST
"plus, she couldn't handle his girth"
What girth? Silver Surfer's got no genitals! At least the Hulk's got the goods.
Awesome love story by the way. Could've been even better if Hulk and Surfer battled it out to the death, though.
Chestnuts roasted by JC @ 09/06/2003 06:18 AM EST
Off topic, but had to mention this. Just to let you know how absurdly far the 80s revival has gone, i just turned on the tv and saw "The Littles"! The freakin' Littles! For those who know not of what i speak: http://www.geocities.com/littles_cartoon/
i turned it off. i may have liked that cartoon as a kid, but i think it could drive me completley insane now. i think the 80s revival has officially gone too far.
Chestnuts roasted by marvel bunny @ 09/06/2003 08:34 AM EST
Wow, that sure was funny.
And JC, that plushie is freaking messed up. o_O
Chestnuts roasted by Zell @ 09/06/2003 09:01 AM EST
great week matt. thae articles were very funny
Chestnuts roasted by 'tin man @ 09/06/2003 10:08 AM EST
hehehehehe funny stuff..... i hate Ben Affleck
Chestnuts roasted by Butcher @ 09/06/2003 10:48 AM EST
Hey Krappy Kat,
Sweet little Judy Winslow is now a porn star, and a pretty bad one at that.
Chestnuts roasted by skiwlz @ 09/06/2003 11:33 AM EST
The 80's revival isn't complete until they bring back 'Jayce & the Wheeled Warriors'; I still got my BeastWalker & TrailBlazer in storage.
Oh, and Judy Winslow...I don't recall the boarding school thing; I always figured she was erased from the time stream after 'Crisis on Infinite Earths'.
Chestnuts roasted by sharkie @ 09/06/2003 11:52 AM EST
That's a weird picture of the Hulk up top. He looks one of those late 90's cartoons about movie monsters or something.
Chestnuts roasted by ineptitude @ 09/06/2003 12:07 PM EST
Anyone who needs proof the 80's are coming back needs only to brave a Hot Topic and look at some of the t-shirts they have for sale. Care Bears, Strawberry Shortcake, My Litte Pony, and Rainbow Brite next to all their goth stuff... and a bunch of new Ninteno tees to boot! I've got the one with the 8-bit Zelda arsenal that says in its classic cheesy font, "Don't make me go Zelda on you!"
Roll, roll, roll in zee hay... Hey, Matt! That reminds me! Since you're going to be going Hallowspooky soon, you should review Young Frankenstine. ^^
Chestnuts roasted by Freezair @ 09/06/2003 03:45 PM EST
And JC, that plushie is freaking messed up. o_O
Yeah, but I bet it's great for terrorising your little sister.
And speaking of the 80's revival, there are really two things I wish they'd just bring back the way they were. The first is The Real Ghostbusters, because that's got to be one of the finest cartoon series ever. The second is dumb horror films, because they just don't make them anymore like they used to.
Oh yeah, and arcades with coin-op classics too.
GIVE ME MY SPACE HARRIER AND OUT RUN AND GOLDEN AXE AND OF COURSE GALAGA YOU HEARTLESS BASTARDS GRAAAAARRGGH SMASH
Chestnuts roasted by JC @ 09/06/2003 07:27 PM EST
>I still think we should roll our separate ways
------
I was waiting for hulk to start singing "Someday love will find you..."
Chestnuts roasted by viru @ 09/06/2003 08:22 PM EST
You are aware, JC, that Out Run and Space Harrier, at least, are back in near arcade-perfect form (yes, except for lower resolution, I know) on the Gameboy Advance in the Sega Arcade Gallery.
And, even better, there's a full-fledged modern sequel to Out Run coming to arcades and, at least, the X-Box, Out Run 2 (official site), with several different Ferraris this time, including the sweet-looking F-50 besides the classic Testarossa. I am so lokking forward to that one.
What's the music video with the astronaut that spoofs Space Harrier at one point?
Chestnuts roasted by Steve Brandon @ 09/06/2003 08:23 PM EST
Hee hee. Someone actually appreciated my roll in the hay joke for about two seconds.
BURPLE!
Chestnuts roasted by freakachu @ 09/06/2003 10:12 PM EST
...goddammit, now he's gotten himself a livejournal to write sappy song parodies in.
...and it's all that little tart's fault.
Chestnuts roasted by Aeire @ 09/07/2003 05:14 AM EST
Bah. Enough about bloody balls! He-Man just hit it's 20th anniversary! I'm surprised you didn't do anything to commemorate the event.
101 ways to torture Man-At-Arms.
A look at the various He-Man in carnations.
A look at how the name Mantenna inspires perverted giggles. ANYTHING!
Chestnuts roasted by Aaron @ 09/07/2003 10:32 AM EST
You are aware, JC, that Out Run and Space Harrier, at least, are back in near arcade-perfect form (yes, except for lower resolution, I know) on the Gameboy Advance in the Sega Arcade Gallery.
I wasn't actually, but, you know, there's also such a thing as mame, not to mention Genesis/Megadrive emulators. I could play those games on my PC if I wanted, but nothing beats those flipping awesome sit-down cabinets you'd find in the arcade.
And, even better, there's a full-fledged modern sequel to Out Run coming to arcades and, at least, the X-Box, Out Run 2 (official site), with several different Ferraris this time, including the sweet-looking F-50 besides the classic Testarossa. I am so lokking forward to that one.
That IS pretty cool, but I don't own an X-box (won't be buying one either, but then my last console was a Master System II) and the arcade has become all but extinct here in retarded Holland...
*sniff*
Chestnuts roasted by JC @ 09/07/2003 04:11 PM EST
I could have sworn Shortcake was going to admit to being a lesbian. With her and her friends...... It just makes sense.
I like Balls.
Chestnuts roasted by Tessie @ 09/07/2003 08:21 PM EST
Or Hulk could have left her for the Surfer.
Chestnuts roasted by Justin @ 09/08/2003 12:06 AM EST
Maybe Shortcake is a dyke with the other two chicks pictured with her!!
Chestnuts roasted by Danny C. @ 09/08/2003 11:48 AM EST
The balls look a little damp. And what is that musky scent?
Chestnuts roasted by Zach Galligan @ 09/08/2003 01:23 PM EST
Hmm...so when they write their initials on a tree together, it's going to be SS loves SS? Or SS + SS? Someone will think Hitler's back or something
Chestnuts roasted by Kiften @ 09/08/2003 05:00 PM EST
