Unfortunately, the well was pretty dry -- they hadn't "cleaned up" by any stretch; it was still filthy beyond compare with dusty stock boxes littering the floor to the point where some aisles were almost inaccessible. Pretty bad trip, actually -- one of my old high school friends popped in, and true to form, I took it as permission to duck into the store's stock room for five minutes until he left. By the time I came out and assured the woman that I hadn't been kidnapped or stabbed, the clerk noticed all the suspicious behavior and started treating us like we actually had the intentions of stealing any of the pitifully expired crap on his shelves. To give you an idea of what we're dealing with, this is the kind of place that still has teaser posters for Zima up in prominent spots, plus a Slush Puppy machine currently being used as a massive ashtray, which is odd, since nobody's supposed to be smoking in there. In any event, we didn't leave totally empty-handed...
REPLIES: 68 comments
1st post. Woo-hoo
Jello, reminds me of happy thoughts. Like BBQ's and Jello mixed with Vodka. Maybe that would sanitize it Matt, mix up some nice Old Sckool Jello shooters.
Chestnuts roasted by Yet Hunter @ 07/09/2003 06:41 PM EST
I feel kind of sick after seeing that. :p
Chestnuts roasted by kennef @ 07/09/2003 07:21 PM EST
I might have felt sick after reading this, but I'm still reeling from to Go-Bots sodomy clip.
Chestnuts roasted by Hellpop! @ 07/09/2003 07:28 PM EST
Holy moley four in one day? What an Italian Stallion.
Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 07/09/2003 07:38 PM EST
This is off topic, but is anybody else looking forward to that new Fox show, "Banzai?" Its actually the American version of a British show with the same name. I remember seeing it here on a channel in Canada, and I always laughed my fucking ass off! Seriously, I know it looks really stupid. And quite frankly, it is, but in that, "Take out your brain and just laugh yourself shitless" way of funny.
That said, Matt, REVIEW MAC AND ME!!!! And while you're at it, you may wanna consider a review of the Monopoly game show, too.
cruiz@scotsmanality.com
http://www.scotsmanality.com
Chestnuts roasted by A-wel Cruiz @ 07/09/2003 08:04 PM EST
I think that jell-o is about 10-8 years old and way less than 15. I remember begging my mom to make me some.
P.S. you should review an old bag of Sprinkled Chips Ahoy!
Chestnuts roasted by pikachulover @ 07/09/2003 08:32 PM EST
I knew that I would one day be able to find a use for remembering this:
Did that wiggle?
Did that wobble?
Did that cup of
Jell-o give a little Jiggle?
Anytime or anyplace
Now you can have that fruity taste
Now that Jell-o
Put the Jiggle
IN A CUP!
I hate myself for wasting brain cells that would go better to remembering important things. Like that Megatron is not a tank.
Chestnuts roasted by Bansheex @ 07/09/2003 09:08 PM EST
Oooh, I almost forgot
!!Who Would Win In A Fight?!!
Today's contendors are:
Photog Vs. Expred Jell-o
Get it on!
Chestnuts roasted by Bansheex @ 07/09/2003 09:11 PM EST
I -just- finished off a bowl of Jello, and I'm very, very glad it involved neither watermelon nor pineapple flavors.
Chestnuts roasted by octavian10_99 @ 07/09/2003 10:17 PM EST
Wow Matt you've been a busy boy with your blogging today...
Chestnuts roasted by Katie @ 07/09/2003 10:59 PM EST
Hey Bansheex, that's my job... Ah, whatever.
That "NEW" on the Jello box sort of makes the Jello an oxymoron, doesn't it. A paradox. You know, everytime you create a paradox, an alternate demension is distroyed.
Chestnuts roasted by Mr. Mr. Mr. @ 07/10/2003 12:31 AM EST
Maybe this paradox will destroy any universe that has produced "Mac and Me". I certainly hope so. Long live Toilet Duck obsessions.
Chestnuts roasted by Sean @ 07/10/2003 02:18 AM EST
iin soapbox
BANZAI MUST DIE!!!!
[repeat x100]
FUCKS will PAY for cancelling the almighty holiest of holy shows for this! I don't care if they say the Eon Ticket code, I STILL Hate them! And I'm rightly prejudiced, unlike SCREWS Coporation, who cancelled a show just because Groening still had negligable power in it!
And just how will Rupert BUTTOCK pay? One word:
"LAWSUIT"
If American Eagle can't even make shirts with themes mildly along these lines without going to LawyerHell, then... 20th... HOMOSEXUAL Fox Television is going to be legally SCREWED UP THE ASS like a Go-Bot we know so well. Damn them. I hate The Simpsons, 'cause the people who write the script now are just TOO DAMN UNORIGINAL to make any new material except "Isn't [character] such a [cliché]? and GAY TWISTS. DAMNIT, NOW THEY MADE ME PUT A LAPTOP INTO NUMLOCK TO TYPE SPECIAL CHARACTERS! DAMN THEM! DAMN THEM ALL TO HELL!
That's why EVERY FREAKIN' EPISODE NOW needs guest stars, which they can all get, people just love pretending to be funny and making "worship gestures" to them! They all say "Amen Saint Groening!" though the SPOON FED CRAP they're taking nowadays has been PURGED of all MG due to the DUMBASSES hatred for his non-100%-COMPLIANCE! THIS IS WHY HE ONLY WROTE 1 WHOLE EPISODE OF THE ENTIRE FREAKI' SERIES! LOOK HOW THEY'RE PUSHING ALL THIS CRAP MERCHANDISING! The Simpsons used to make FUN of this sort of thing, which I think the pot-smoking dumbass current writers of the show are under the impression that they are doing! There's a big, broad margin of "overmerchaindising" and "knocking the ridiculous crap". The Simpsons has well past crossed it.
That's why I hate them all.
iend soapbox
Chestnuts roasted by "MR. GAME & WATCH" @ 07/10/2003 03:12 AM EST
(flame in response to A-Wel Cruiz. Sorry, A-Wel, but that's just what I do as a Futurama fan whenever some one says something like that.
Chestnuts roasted by "MR. GAME & WATCH" @ 07/10/2003 03:15 AM EST
McDonald's Tests Self-Ordering Kiosks
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A31730-2003Jul9.html
Good thing I am awake to find there is now another ME. Pseudo-ME, you are my hero! Remember I try to keep Photog comments in the proper blog.
Chestnuts roasted by ME @ 07/10/2003 04:01 AM EST
Mr. G&W, you don't have to tell me. I'm a Futurama fan, too. I still haven't got over the show's cancelation. I also haven't gotten over the cancelation of Family Guy. That show had limitless potentional, and what do they do? Put it opposite Frasier! To quote the greatest movie ever made, Clerks: "Fuckin' dickheads!"
Oh yeah, REVIEW MAC AND ME!!!!
Chestnuts roasted by A-wel Cruiz @ 07/10/2003 10:17 AM EST
HOLY SODOMY BATMAN!I might get fired for it, but I have to show that go-bot's clip to everyone here at work. oh yea, jello's nasty enough when it's fresh, I couldn't believe anyone in their right mind would eat that shit...oh wait, I eat that...why does something so gross taste sooooo good?
At least I don't eat velveta...I've heard horror stories, from employee's.
*shudders*
Chestnuts roasted by brandon @ 07/10/2003 10:59 AM EST
Fuck Mac and Me!
Chestnuts roasted by Sonny Corleone @ 07/10/2003 01:36 PM EST
Review Mac and Me yourself. You're making Canadians look obsessive (instead of boring, I suppose).
Or maybe it's part of some plot to subliminally advertise McDonald's here? Of course, if anyone is tempted, just go read the McGriddles article again. That should quench the need for a McDick's Fix. Long live home cooking.
Chestnuts roasted by Sean @ 07/10/2003 01:56 PM EST
Well I don't care if Veleeta is made from the condensed drippings of GoBot ass rape mixed with freshly ground babies. I can't get enough of its delightful cheesieness.
Chestnuts roasted by Gozer @ 07/10/2003 02:12 PM EST
Honestly, A-wel, don't you think it's time to pack it in? Send an email for chrissakes and drop it already.
The Simpson do and always will rule. No Simpsons: no Family Guy, no South Park and no Futurama.
G&W, Futurama will still be on Cartoon Network. If you're going to get all worked up about Fox cancelling a good show for a HORRIFIC STUPID 'WONDER YEARS ON ACID' RIPOFF PIECE OF CRAP, than how about Andy Richter Controls the Universe versus Oliver Beene?
Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 07/10/2003 03:56 PM EST
Matt, you've got to tell me where on the Island this store is. If there's a place nearby selling 10 year old Hi-C and cookies, I've got to know about it. I think I emailed you about this once, but it probably got lost in the tons of other mail you probably get. Unless you responded, and it got lost in the tons of spam I get, which for some reason is all in Korean.
Chestnuts roasted by MG @ 07/10/2003 05:31 PM EST
MG - you're on the Island? Rare! :) The store is in Tottenville, by Tottenville's premiere spot, Burger King. E-mail me for more deetales.
Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 07/10/2003 06:05 PM EST
From my opinion from the one episode I saw (the one where they had that mean boss who had cancer and wanted to meet Croc Dundee. If this was an anomaly and the rest are pretty good- which could very well be true, you gota be good to be a Conan sidekick), ARCTU was marginal. Not modern Simpsons bad, but it only had 3 good jokes, all of which shown in commercials. The rest was a perfect C. Never seen Oliver Beene- been trying to avoid FOX Sunday night, just to be pained by a Futurama cancellation for a KOTH rerun I've already seen and an "all" "new" Simpsons (which causes me to run screaming from the room like President Skroob from the bear).
On FG: True. It had Seth Green and an evil baby (who shares my name and general disposition of plain broccoli). Haven't really seen too much, but what I have seen really was good.
Futurama RERUNS will be on CN. I don't need reruns, or I won't when they come out on DVD (which get REALLY high sales). I will save a little space on my ReplayTV for it every night in tribute, though (until it's taken off the air for new shows, a reasonable strategy, as long as they eventually return the show that got CN the BEST RATINGS IT'S EVER HAD and brought AS the attention it deserves. (Not like it was being Futurama'd or anything.) They 're actually being quite nice to Futurama, are obviously watching the DVDs, and are keeping it on longer than the rest).
Mac & Me was that show that gave MJF EOP, right? Or was it a movie, possibly not with Fox at all? If it's the former, I would kind of like to see young McFly's big TV debut. I'm kind of having a "Now that my brain is developed enough to understand words and stay awake through the whole thing, I might as well watch the movie to see if I like it" phase (catching up on movies I've always wanted to see- Pulp Fiction, Annie Hall, Totall Recall, etc.). Michael J. Fox is one I'm looking into (saw Teen Wolf & BTTF (BTTF about 3000 times 'cause I've always loved it and even more since I've been able to comprehend it).)
I'm not canning the Simpsons entirely (you're reading about a guy who has vitually memorized the first guide). I'm canning the RECENT stuff. It sucks like a black hole does the Titanic.
The Simpsons did, and no longer, rule.
p.s. Sonny Corleone- that sounds pretty wrong when you take it apart for multiple subjects- "Fuck Mac & Fuck Me."
I'm just mad 'cause my Dad has been in the hopsicke for the past 7+ days, had to have double surgery (colon infection removal and appendix removal), has been in intense pain, and will be houseridden for the next 7+ days, plus the hospital may have kicked him out a bit too early. Also, he's the only one in my family (aka my mom's not interested, I'm an only child) who is interested in T3 and now neither of us can see it. On the upside, he's home, he's pretty good, and I've had an entire week of *no* adult supervision!
And there's my life's story.
Chestnuts roasted by "MR. GAME & WATCH" @ 07/10/2003 11:59 PM EST
Whoops, that's Leo & Me.
Matt, review Leo & Me!
Chestnuts roasted by "MR. GAME & WATCH" @ 07/11/2003 01:51 AM EST
I think that watermelon jello could be from the early 90's. I think there was this watermelon craze back then.
Chestnuts roasted by Anita @ 07/11/2003 09:54 PM EST
Banzai will suck because American remakes of anything fantastic suck. Especially when made by Fox.
Fox must die. Die die die die.
Chestnuts roasted by Mel @ 07/11/2003 10:22 PM EST
Fox must die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die.
I TYPED THOSE ALL BY HAND! I MEAN IT! FOX TELEVISION MUST DIE!
Chestnuts roasted by "MR. GAME & WATCH" @ 07/12/2003 11:06 AM EST
I was originally going to stay out of this..."blog"... you call it because frankly I know very little about jell-o and have eaten it only when I went to a chinese restraunt as it was there only form of dessert.However the subject has changed as things always do to comments on the Simpsons, which may make Matt cry becuse he so wanted us to talk about Pre-Cambrian gelatin, and so I must add my pittance. Simpsons was once one of the greatest shows of all time particulary the third to sixth seasons and all the treehouse of horrors up until the crappy one with Xena.I feel it has gotten worse because we have become so enamored with it. Our reverence for the show allows it to make unfunny and often insulting episodes, and I for one believe it falls on the shoulders of the ivy league writers who have turned the show into their own personal social club.Back when Conan was writing for the show he was still able to maintain that blue collar vibe with only hints of social pandering but the current writers only seem amused in bringing Robert Pinsky, talking about fractals and reading gravity rainbow all within the same episode, granted the episode was about college yet the technique is done all to often. Hardly an episode goes by that the writers don't celebrate their alma matter by bashing Yale, Vasser, Brown or whatever else tickles their fancy.They seem even more pleased by throughing crap together and seeing what we'll take when they end it with every one surfing or Moe in midsentance, they know that most of us will watch because of our loyalty towards our memory of the past. I know they do the cop out ending as a tool that makes fun of the medium they are in but it used far to much. I remember when I first started seeing the cracks, it was the Poochie episode and what I remember most is Comic book guy saying that as a fan "they owe me" to which Bart says that if anything "you owe them",that made me extremely angry,I was in my early teens (I'm 19) but I knew that was a knock against fans complaints against the show. Well for the writer who put those words in one of my favorite tv character's mouth I say this " NO, YOU OWE ME.AS A LOYAL FAN SENSE IT'S DAYS IN THE TRACY ULLMAN SHOW I HAVE ENJOYED THE SIMPSONS ON MANY LEVELS BUT I WILL NOT TAKE A BRUSH OFF OF A LEGITIMATE COMPLAINT WITH A POOR EXCUSE AT WIT.YOU KNOW WHY YOU OWE ME?! BECAUSE I LOVE THIS SHOW AND HAVE SPENT A LARGE TIME PROVING IT, WHETHER IT BE BUYING BUTTERFINGERS,PLAYING HORRENDOUS SIMPSONS GAMES OR BUYING INSANELY OVER PRICED ACTION FIGURES, AND I'M NOT ALONE." The writer's main concerns seem to be putting their own ivy covered values into the show and I say that typing this up from the Harvard Science Center Basement. My point is this, Simpsons was once a show that in a small way belonged to all of us but that is no longer the case, the show is no longer ours and when Groening did try to give us something again not enough of us came to see. So in a large way it's partly our fault. Many people dismissed Futurama as a cash in attempt and I think this is perfectly illustrated by a show called Beat The Geeks, in it the host asks the "TV Expert" if Futurama compares to the Simpsons. The fat,mutton chopped "experts" response, "No" he says with a snobbish air as if anything can compare with Simpsons, and that my friends is the problem, we let ourselves go unheard and we have payed the price (this only goes for people who liked Futurama, the rest of you can catch the tail end of the episode where Homer smokes pot) we didn't support Futurama, or Family Guy (which was sheer genius) or to a lesser extent The Critic and so they go to that mysterious place called syndication with only my fond memories of a 100 foot Bender crushing Hanson,a jovial Zoidberg Jesus,Stewie asking Peter if he wants a soooooddaaaa, or a tearful rendition of the theme from the Hulk once again by Stewie,goodbye sweet dreams for men were not meant to observe such beauty.
Chestnuts roasted by Happnin' Mojo @ 07/12/2003 04:03 PM EST
Oh I've been watching the Simpsons since I was 4 years old and though it is mostly just stupid anymore, there are the rare good new episodes...damn writers! I LOVE FAMILY GUY! Peter is my hero! God they should bring that back, A GIRL CANT LIVE OFF RERUNS FOREVER!!!! Futurama kicks ass too! Doesnt anyone remember the Critic (shown around midnight on Sunday on Comedy Central)? THAT SHOW NEEDS TO COME BACK TOO!!!! I luv Jay hehe....
Chestnuts roasted by Katie @ 07/12/2003 08:30 PM EST
Happnin' Mojo hit it RIGHT ON THE HEAD. Perfect. Just want to say that, if you didn't know already, the Critic had a short stint with internet films for 10 short eps, stopped dead around 9/11. Look around AtomFilms, persistence will pay off.
http://www.atomfilms.com
Chestnuts roasted by "MR. GAME & WATCH" @ 07/12/2003 11:40 PM EST
Happnin' Mojo, you just got a standing ovation from this loser at his computer on a Saturday night. Your the exception that makes this Boston born guy not write off Harvard completely.
Chestnuts roasted by Michael @ 07/13/2003 01:54 AM EST
The Critic will always have a special place in my heart, especially his review of Willy Wonka where he turns into a giant blueberry and his Turneresque boss trying to make his network's trademark the Heil Hitler salute.
As for Family Guy,I was able to turn my pschology teacher into a fan of the show and for about half of the second semester all we really did was watch episodes that I taped at home, things came to a grinding halt however with 9/11 and my stupid mistake of showing the episode with Osama and the episode with the pedophile on Greg's (the son) route. Soon after
I made a club in high school that was basically us watching that as well as Duckman,Rocko's Modern Life, Invader Zim, and Christopher Guest movies.Needless to say,we had no female members or lives.I don't think any of us would be as happy as we blissfully are if it wasn't for Comedy Central and Adult Swim reminding us just how brilliant some shows are.
PS.I've recently heard rumors that Comedy Central is interested in bringing back Family Guy but you never know.
Chestnuts roasted by Happnin' Mojo @ 07/13/2003 01:06 PM EST
In defense of the Simpsons: I don't think the show is half as bad as you guys are making it out to be. Is it as good as it used to be? No. But has it jumped the shark? Hell, no! Admittedly, it's gotten more surreal, more self-aware and more cartoony, but that's okay. It's changed, but it's not the travesty you're making it out to be. It's still funny...is it still as funny? No. But it's still the best show on television. Saying the show survives because of people being enamored with it and revering so much is absurd. If the show was as bad as you say it is, people would realize it and stop watching, leaving it to die, and I don't think that's happening. Also, the comment was made, "Back when Conan was writing the show..." Ah, yes, the whopping FOUR episodes he wrote, one of which being a Treehouse of Horror episode, so he only wrote part of that...the best writers the show has are Al Jean, Mike Reiss and John Swartzwelder, and I think they're still there. I agree with Mojo that we don't owe the creators of the Simpsons anything. They owe the fans, because it's the fans that have stuck with the show, bought the merchandise, etc, etc etc. I also agree that Futurama was not a cash-in attempt, it was an underrated, brilliant show. Big ditto for the Family Guy, which only pales to the Simpsons in comparison. In closing, lay off the Simpsons...it may not be as good as it used to be, but it's still pretty fucking good.
Chestnuts roasted by Teddy Ray @ 07/13/2003 04:40 PM EST
Here's the moment I knew the Simpsons had lost it. Last season (I think) there was an episode where Homer broke his jaw, and was forced to stop drinking and talking. Unable to get drunk and say stupid stuff, he was no longer the crazy one, so Marge decides to pick up the slack and enter a demolition derby (already, this is a stupid plotline).
Homer runs to the rescue, but because he's lost the knack for acting crazy, he doesn't know what to do, so Bart offers him a beer. Homer squeezes it Popeye style and drinks it down, a sight gag which actually got a chuckle out of me.
Now here's where it goes wrong: for the next several minutes, Homer talks like Popeye, and Marge screams like Olive Oyl. Previously the show's writers ALWAYS knew when to let a gag drop, but this time they beat it to death, trying to elicit four or five laughs out of what was, at best, a one-note joke.
For the record, I thought Futurama never lived up to its potential, and Family Guy tries way too hard to cram as many gags as possible into every scene (the show falls into a predictable rhythm of setup and punchline, and most of the jokes can be seen coming a mile away...another failing of the Simpsons recently).
For animated comedy I stick with Aqua Teen Hunger Force nowadays, even though there are only like 8 episodes that they just play over and over again.
Chestnuts roasted by Hellpop! @ 07/13/2003 06:07 PM EST
In response to Teddy Ray I would just like to say that saying something is not as good as used to be but it's still cranking episodes out is a form of philosophy I'll never buy into.Yes,one can never expect a show to be as good as Simpsons once was forever,but that wasn't my point.My point was that the fans are seen as marginal and our criticism is discounted as the ranting of loser nerds,which it might be and that is where my anger lies. I still watch it but I notice that I have a far greater enjoyment in watching the older episodes then the newer ones and to me that is a bad sign, but hey what do I know.All that I'm sating is that the writers should give us more then your standard "Homer-sexual" story and phrases like "hemmoraghe-a-mundo" Ugh.
I must compliment Teddy Ray on his comments which he laid out with out degenerating into Fuck You's, You suck, Simpsons rules, etc. For that you have my respect.
And that Homer becomes tame story came on last night I believe.
P.S. I love Sealab,Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Space Ghost Coast to Coast and Harvey Birdman. I can't explain the sheer will it takes for me to not yell Biiiiirrrrddddmmmmmmaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnn!!!!! when walking into class, doing my Meatball impression in casual conversation or telling my Professor "Whoa check out that Journey belt! Is that from their '81 tour?!".
Chestnuts roasted by Happnin' Mojo @ 07/13/2003 07:05 PM EST
I caught that jump the shark bit, very funny. The Fonz would be proud...if he were nice...and real.
Chestnuts roasted by Happnin' Mojo @ 07/13/2003 07:07 PM EST
Mojo, for the record, I never used the "it's not as good, but they're still making it" philosophy. What I was driving at was the fact that no, it's not as good as it used to be, but it's still pretty damn good. Unlike, say, the original TMNT cartoon. When it started, it was pretty damn good. However, after time it degenerated into nothing but a series of stupid catchphrases and pizza jokes...not good at all, but they kept making it. That pisses me off, but I don't think it's the case with the Simpsons. You make some valid points, so don't think I completely disagree with you. Also, in regard to your slight criticism of "hemorrhage-a-mundo," that was a joke about the Fonz, not just some stupid phrase they threw in for no good reason. Of course, you probably already knew that, I just wanted to clarify. In closing, thanks for the respect. You give it to me, I'll give it back. And I like Adult Swim stuff, too, although I don't catch it nearly as much as I'd like. Biiiiiiirdmaaaaaan!
Chestnuts roasted by Teddy Ray @ 07/14/2003 10:28 AM EST
I guess it is okay. It's just that I had so much reverence for the show and I see it slipping, for a long time I couldn't even admit to myself that it wasn't as good anymore but I found out the hard way, the show has it's moments I suppose but it isn't something I look forward to as much as King of the Hill. Example; I watched all Fox last night (there is literally nothing else on because I use a 99 cent store antenna) and can say with all honesty that the first Simpsons was a dud. The second episode's first three minutes were a good start but it quickly sank, in the end I got more enjoyment out of the last 5 minutes of KotH."Youuu sickennnnnn meeeeee".
A-wel Cruiz, they seemed to have left Banzai intact, whether that is a good thing or not is for each person to decide for themself.If I remember correctly Banzai was on USA network for a short time.
Oliver Beene isn't horrendous and is somewhat redeemed with his gay little friend and David Cross as the narrator.I'd still rather keep Futurama though.
Andy Richter's show is funny to me, where else am I gonna see a faux Hitler selling sandwiches and a very muscular boxing kangaroo. If you want a good episode you should see the one that deals with racism because of Andy's Irish coworker.
I think a lot of us enjoy Family Guy for the same reason we enjoy this site, funny writing and obscure bits from the past. I completely forgot about Land of the Lost and the blonde chick from the Facts of Life.
So in closing the only way to save the Simpsons is to reanimate Nathan Bitner's corpse, hire him as new lead writer and make Photog Smither's boyfriend. Or not.
Chestnuts roasted by Happnin' Mojo @ 07/14/2003 01:04 PM EST
I have to agree with Hellpop and Happnin' Mojo, Adult Swim lineup is wonderful. I still have to fight to not yell "Birdman" when I accomplish anything. I am the only person at work and in my family that can do the perfect Meatwad impression. Family Guy, Futurama, and don't forget the ulitmate anime, Trigun! Sealab 2021 is hands-down the most slap-nuts funny TV show ever made! EVER!
Chestnuts roasted by Bansheex @ 07/14/2003 06:07 PM EST
Just to clarify (be cause I do so love to clarify), I don't Simpsons is BAD now, just less great (to a significant degree) than it used to be. I firmly believe that at it's peak, it was the funniest television show ever (yes, EVEN funnier than Small Wonder!!!), and it's hard to stay that good forever, so seeing the show slip after awhile is expected.
But no matter how far The Simpsons might ever slip, it's the only network primetime show to use the word "gloryhole", so it'll always have a place in my heart.
Chestnuts roasted by Hellpop! @ 07/14/2003 07:55 PM EST
I Wanna see BM:AAL, but it hasn't (to my knowledge) been on lately.
Er, jump the shark's become pretty common now, it was in Gump Roast, and there's even a documenting site of sharkers.
http://www.jumptheshark.com
Chestnuts roasted by "MR. GAME & WATCH" @ 07/14/2003 11:34 PM EST
My friend Romulo (that's his real name...you can stalk him) thinks he's the next Woody Allen because he dislikes Sealab but loves Dr.Katz and Home Movies.
Chestnuts roasted by Happnin' Movies @ 07/15/2003 01:38 AM EST
I just wanted to say that i work in a store like the one he buys all this shit at, and the other day i was stocking shelves........and saw the same jello.............
Chestnuts roasted by chandlerbing @ 07/15/2003 01:29 PM EST
That Jello is from circa 1992-1995. It was in my mum's food cabinet when I was in grammar school.
Chestnuts roasted by NEWFXP @ 07/18/2003 11:02 PM EST
Wait, wait. No more watermelon OR pineapple??? Those were the best ones for Jell-o shots!
Chestnuts roasted by carrera @ 07/24/2003 01:13 PM EST
Hmm, well, as I haven't seen "The Simpsons" in years, have never seen more than a clip of "Futurama," and didn't like "Family Guy," I can't really add to that conversation.
Matt's article about the Bubble Gum Hi-C is a favorite of mine. Not only do I remember when that juice was actually on the market (and something close to drinkable), but there are stores in South Jersey that carry merchandise almost as old as the "juice" and the Jell-O. The stuff you'll find in the family-owned dollar stores scares me. I've seen packages of cookie mix older than my 10-year-old brother.
BTW, while I've never seen the watermelon Jell-O, I think they still make a variation on the Pineapple.
Chestnuts roasted by starwenn @ 08/16/2003 09:17 PM EST
The "Jigglers" came about 89/90. I remember that shit. Anyways, I think it would be great to use that stuff to torture people with. I mean c'mon...What's worse, electricity, having the soles of your feet beat...Or having to eat really old jello??? Hehehe!!!! I gots an idea, but first...Can you get me some really old crap from that infernal store??? I promise I won't eat it...
Chestnuts roasted by Crow Warrior @ 11/05/2003 05:32 PM EST
The "Jigglers" came about 89/90. I remember that shit. Anyways, I think it would be great to use that stuff to torture people with. I mean c'mon...What's worse, electricity, having the soles of your feet beat...Or having to eat really old jello??? Hehehe!!!! I gots an idea, but first...Can you get me some really old crap from that infernal store??? I promise I won't eat it...
Chestnuts roasted by Crow Warrior @ 11/05/2003 05:32 PM EST
The "Jigglers" came about 89/90. I remember that shit. Anyways, I think it would be great to use that stuff to torture people with. I mean c'mon...What's worse, electricity, having the soles of your feet beat...Or having to eat really old jello??? Hehehe!!!! I gots an idea, but first...Can you get me some really old crap from that infernal store??? I promise I won't eat it...
Chestnuts roasted by Crow Warrior @ 11/05/2003 05:33 PM EST
The "Jigglers" came about 89/90. I remember that shit. Anyways, I think it would be great to use that stuff to torture people with. I mean c'mon...What's worse, electricity, having the soles of your feet beat...Or having to eat really old jello??? Hehehe!!!! I gots an idea, but first...Can you get me some really old crap from that infernal store??? I promise I won't eat it...
Chestnuts roasted by Crow Warrior @ 11/05/2003 05:33 PM EST
My bad. bad bad bad computer....It's a handitard. Sorry for the multiple crap there. Bad computer!!!! Spank me daddy!!! I've been bad!!!!
Chestnuts roasted by Crow Warrior @ 11/05/2003 05:35 PM EST
Matt, you are one crazy crazy crazy guy!!!
And just love your website!
I love the 80's!
Chestnuts roasted by JAS12894 @ 11/05/2003 08:23 PM EST
Matt, you are one crazy crazy crazy guy!!!
And just love your website!
I love the 80's!
Chestnuts roasted by JAS12894 @ 11/05/2003 08:24 PM EST
Both Banzi and Keen Eddie got canceled... the OC obviously won the summer slump.
If Keen Eddie were still on, chicks would be swooning over Julian Rhind-Tutt (Monty Pippin) by now!
Chestnuts roasted by Ange Faitore @ 11/06/2003 09:40 AM EST
Is there anything organic in Jello to go bad?
Chestnuts roasted by TOP1214 @ 11/06/2003 04:01 PM EST
I cleaned out my grandmother's cabinets about 3 weeks ago and found 8 boxes of 20 year old Jello and Jello pudding. Back when it was in brown and pink striped boxes.
Chestnuts roasted by Didi @ 11/06/2003 07:01 PM EST
Jello is made out of bones. Bones and skins of cows and pigs. If you don't believe me go to this website: http://www.snopes.com/food/ingredient/ingredient.htm
Jello scares me.
Chestnuts roasted by two_peep_army @ 11/07/2003 03:55 PM EST
Holy CRAP!!! I think I have some of that still stashed away in the back bottom of the cupboard in my mom's house in the dining room behind tons of other old foods! And we ATE IT. I think that's the same box of pineapple jell-o I made for my brother that I hawked a loogie in and fed to him. Maybe... I should warn mom? Nah... let her eat it without realizing. It'll be funny. :-D I never liked jello anyways. It's like solidified gizz.
Chestnuts roasted by Zeekitty @ 11/07/2003 09:25 PM EST
My cats breath smells like cat food.
Chestnuts roasted by glitch77 @ 11/08/2003 12:58 PM EST
I'm glad fox cancelled banzai. Only assholes like that racist piece of shit.
Chestnuts roasted by asone @ 11/10/2003 02:52 PM EST
paragraphs. please.
Chestnuts roasted by some guy @ 11/16/2003 03:09 PM EST
d00d ... I'll take it off your hands!!! ... hehe, just kidding, but seriously, that's pretty gross. You should send a health inspector over to that store.
Chestnuts roasted by mouthfullofplacebo @ 11/29/2003 10:16 PM EST
d00d ... I'll take it off your hands!!! ... hehe, just kidding, but seriously, that's pretty gross. You should send a health inspector over to that store.
Chestnuts roasted by mouthfullofplacebo @ 11/29/2003 10:16 PM EST
d00d ... I'll take it off your hands!!! ... hehe, just kidding, but seriously, that's pretty gross. You should send a health inspector over to that store.
Chestnuts roasted by mouthfullofplacebo @ 11/29/2003 10:16 PM EST
what the hell is all this talk about Go-bots clip? i want 2 see what it is
Chestnuts roasted by Vernoon57 @ 01/01/2004 07:44 PM EST
*wipes eyes and opens them* ok i got onto this site to read an article about fun dip which by the way rocks and always will. i will love to see the day where matt finds a 40 year old pack of fun dip. muahahahahahaha. anyway. so jello.....herm. i'm not sure if jello CAN go rotten or whatever. not that i'd eat it cause i hate jello in its every form, but honestly. I can understand the fettecini and the hi-c but though the jello is old and that store should have the national gaurd and people in radiation suits swarming all over it, i really dont think jello can go bad. next, about the simpsons: I used to watch that show all the time when i was a kid and i loved it but not enough to go out and madly buy stupid games and action figures....ok so my mom bought a talking bart doll once but that was it. i dont watch it all that much anymore unless there is nothing else on or if i stumble across it while surfing. i like it still but not as much as i once did. to the critic and futurama and the family guy (i lump them all into a few sentences because my wrists hurt) they were good. not like excellent but entertaining enough to cheer someone up or to offer a laugh during a bad day. i liked them. i wish they hadnt been cancelled but hey. life goes on.
Chestnuts roasted by depeche_mode @ 01/15/2004 09:47 PM EST
God Almighty!
Please tell me that you are reporting this ancient food for sale to your local health department!!
Chestnuts roasted by 21stCenturyFox @ 04/24/2004 01:00 PM EST
