This is your all-purpose Thanksgiving thread. Discuss what you’re eating, where you’re going and who you’re seeing.
What are you thankful for? Is it turkeys? It should be. So many turkeys gave their lives for tomorrow’s dinner.
Let us honor their sacrifices with random turkey facts, stolen from the Internet at large.
It is not uncommon for turkeys to hide in trees at night. Despite popular misconceptions, many turkeys can fly. The ones we eat are specially bred to be too fat to do so.
If a turkey looks up during a rainstorm, it can drown.
Turkey eggs are generally tan, with intense speckles. They are predictably larger than chicken eggs, and they’re even shaped a bit differently. (Actually, if you picked up a pen and drew an egg right now, chances favor your creation more closely resembling turkey eggs than chicken eggs. Do a blind test and then check Google Images. Tell me I’m wrong.)
Turkeys can and have had heart attacks.
A “hen” is a female turkey. Males are called “gobblers” or “toms.” Chicks are “poults.” I don’t know what any other types of turkeys are called.
Benjamin Franklin wanted the turkey to be our national bird – not bald eagles. Since he didn’t get his wish, we may surmise that Ben Franklin was a reasonable fellow who would gladly listen to a good counterargument.
Turkeys prefer a diet of nuts and berries, but they’ll also eat everything from insects to frogs.
When you eat turkey, there is always the remote chance that you’re also eating some small part of a frog.
The thought disgusts me to the point where I am now and forever eating nothing but farina. I won’t even spike the shit with cinnamon.
My only regret will be a steady diet of the only foodstuff to share a name with the worst-ever host of Unsolved Mysteries.
With encouragement, captive turkeys will shed their grosser instincts and dance for Winter Oreo cookies.