Just narrowly surviving Tooth Crisis 2010™, it's time to unveil the big winner of X-E's Least Favorite TV Character Paint Contest! This was a ridiculously tough decision, one that I could've spent weeks on, but through the power of instinct and audience feedback, this particular entry just felt right.
Congratulations, Alex! You've just won the best crab-shaped hat in the history of third-party Amazon sellers!

Uncle Joey was the most-submitted character, and everyone who elected Mr. Gladstone as their patron saint of bad TV really brought their A-game. It wasn't easy to pick one specific Uncle Joey over the rest, but "DURP DURP DURP" gave this one that little special extra push. Awesome work, Alex. May your future by filled with crustacean-topped photo ops.
Still, many of you were viable candidates, so I hope nobody is too disappointed. I wish I could buy everyone crab hats, but I am not that charmed. Remember, though -- everyone who entered is going to get something from me in the next week or two, so chins up, eyes on the mailbox, and thanks again for getting me out of actually having to write something interesting for several days this August!
Posted by Matt on 08/25/2010. E-mail me!










Chestnuts roasted by 







“Glad you enjoyed it. I’m really digging their stuff lately. Thanks for turning me on to a lot of that stuff. You’d die if you saw all the Cirith Ungol and Attacker that we have in vinyl here in the studio.” —DJ D
Haha, I probably would. For whatever it’s worth, per Tolkein himself, it should be a hard C at the beginning of Cirith Ungol, but you’re in good company — the band always mispronounced their own name with a hard C, too.
Anyway, if you like Cirith Ungol, another band in a similar vein that you might dig is Manilla Road. Mark “The Shark” Shelton was about as nasal of a singer as there ever was, but I think it gave ‘em loads of personality.