I know a kid who recently started his very first webcomic. It lives on his hard drive and the continuing series has almost two whole issues. He wanted some feedback, and I gently urged him to move away from his computer's complimentary Paint program and onto Photoshop, or at least, anything that wasn't Paint.

Only the lucky or alien can make good-looking art with Paint, that disagreeable monster, and even people seriously proficient in Photoshop often fail at drawing one little caterpillar in Paint. I don't have statistics to back this up, but it must be true.

In pre-X-Entertainment times, I remember trying to make stuff with Paint. Like, stuff that I intended to show other people. It was a horrible, painful experience, and I think I'd like for you all to experience it.

Consequentially, I introduce you to X-E's Least Favorite TV Character Paint Contest. Your mission: Using your computer's Paint program and nothing but your computer's Paint program, create a work of art featuring your most despised television character.

One grand prize winner will receive this insanely life-altering crab-themed party hat, courtesy of me. There may also be runner-up prizes, but I can't commit to that until I see my next credit card bill. Also, I'm not entirely sure what my criteria will be when it's time to judge, so I cannot suggest a strategy. Mainly, I just enjoy the idea of influencing a small number of people to waste a night drawing Terry from True Blood.

You have until next Saturday, August 14th, at 1 PM EST sharp to send me your entry. JPEG format preferred, but I won't disqualify you over BMPs, because I am not a jerk.

Assuming I get less than 50 of them, all entries will be featured on the site next weekend. This way, even the most enormous losers can be famous.

I too will be entering, though I am not eligible for any prizes. Will spend the week determining which TV character makes me want to die the most, but in the meantime, I thought I'd brush up on my Paint skills, for the sake of the pun if nothing else.

"Vincent Schiavelli in Ghost"
(click here for source image)

"Betsy Palmer Holding Betsy Palmer"
(click here for source image)

"Mohawk in Mogwai Form"
(click here for source image)

"Red Lobster the Restaurant"
(click here for source image)

Have fun with your art, should you choose to make it. Those who choose not to make art have only themselves to blame for being soulless apes. Remember, all entries must be in by 1 PM EST next Saturday. People who send me crude pictures of unfavorable television characters late drive me crazy.