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Evil Clowns, Evil Lip Balm and more Spooky Die-O-Ramas!

Great Pumpkin was on tonight, and for the first time in about ten years, I missed it. Well, I caught enough to notice that ABC took some liberties and made Charlie Brown do some heavy lifting promo work during the commercial breaks -- wtf was that all about? Missed all the good parts, though. If you're in the same boat, take note: ABC is re-airing the special tomorrow night. (I'm sure that there's some ratings/network competition-related reason for this, but I prefer to think that ABC is doing it just for me.)

Thanks to PlantMonster for the hot tip! New (or somewhat newish) at Walgreen's, it's the General Mills Monster Cereals lip balm collection!

I located Boo Berry and Franken Berry, but Count Chocula remains elusive. The completist collector in me is disappointed, but on the other hand, I can't say that I'd be a huge fan of chocolate Chapstick.

There is no feasible way to improve on these. The colors, scents and flavors are totally dead on, to the point where you would guess "Franken Berry" even if you had no idea it was supposed to look/smell/taste like it.

By the way, when I say "taste," I mean it, and not in that bullshit "lick your lips" sort of way. Of all the awful childhood habits that I've never been able to break, treating Chapstick like candy stands proud at the forefront. I've long considered lip balm as a more malleable form of Twizzlers.

While we were out Halloween store-hopping this past weekend, I absolutely could not resist this mask. The "Light Up Clown Mask" was fairly overpriced at twenty bucks, but it stood out like an unholy grail in a mask collection that was mostly filled wih easily recognized movie-and-television characters. I had to have it.

What struck me most is how reminiscent the mask is of those last minute costumes that I used to get from local pharmacies and supermarkets. You know the kind. When I was still young enough to wear costumes but too old to really care what those costumes were, it was common to just pick up the most heinous mask still available at CVS on the night before Halloween. If I was feeling saucy, I'd grab a plastic scythe or something to go along with it.

By that point, costumes were no longer a point of passion for my friends and I. We'd still dress up and go trick-or-treating, but by then, it was just a thing to do...not THE thing to do. Besides, we were really too old to get away with action-packed head-to-toe costumes, anyway. The other kids would've frown upon it and egged us. With all of that in mind, our half-assed costumes always ended up being something like that evil clown mask -- effortless and apathetic enough for us to avoid looking lame, but still somehow great.

The mask has an unmistakable Killer Klowns From Outer Space vibe, and I'm not just saying that because it happens to be a mask based on an evil clown. It really does sort of look like the lead Killer Klown from the movie. Then again, his face didn't light up.

Yeah, so, the mask comes with a tiny push-button remote, which activates a series of white lights that scatter underneath the mask and make your head look like a Christmas tree. It's a common gimmick in pseudo-extravagant Halloween masks, but it works well enough -- or maybe it doesn't.

See, what you can't tell from the crazy animated photo above is that my clown mask arrived completely busted. It's actually taped together up there. In reality, as soon as I opened the package, the mask fell into pieces. Two whole pieces!

The light-up stuff actually exists on a second mask, which, in a perfect world, would remain glued to the outer clown shell, giving consumers the impression that they're buying one whole awesome mask instead of two shitty broken ones. Since this is a pretty old item, the ancient glue lost its once-celebrated adhesiveness, and I was left with what's shown above -- plus a outer clown shell.

Am I disappointed? Not really. The way I figure it, I probably saved some kid from having the worst Halloween ever. We so often forget how a child's sanity hinges on every immediate event, and I can think of no quicker way for a trick-or-treater to have a heart attack than a busted costume. Besides, any kid who would've picked this light-up evil clown mask over some tired Hollywood pop idol costume is someone I'd want to save.

Wow, I totally dropped the ball on getting everyone's entries published in a reasonable timeframe. Sorry about that! We still have a few days left, so by the time Halloweekend is over, all Die-O-Ramas will have had their day in the sun. Or stark raving darkness, as the case may be.

Worst of all, some of the entries I'm stumbling onto now clearly deserved to be among the winners, making me feel like even more of a horrible monster for putting them up so late. Oi. Sorry guys, your work was much more tremendous than my organizational skills. I'm still compiling the remaining entries, but for a taste, here are five reader-created Spooky Die-O-Ramas that you've yet to see!


(Click here to see a larger photo!)

"Shoebox of the Living Dead"
Created By: Kittymao

Full disclosure: This really should've been one of the winners. I knew that the second I saw it, but somehow, I misplaced the e-mail and screwed up. Well, better late than never: Kittymao, you've won yourself a DVD! It may arrive after Halloween, but horror movies are still okay in November.

I'll let her describe it: "In a nutshell, it is the Beginning Graveyard Scene from Night of the Living Dead -- the 1990 version, directed by Tom Savini. Johnny has just wrestled with the western Bolo Zombie -- AND LOST -- and our forlorn and scared Barbara is about to make a run for it."

Incredibly, Kittymao made all of the elements -- she sculpted and painted the figures, and even sketched out the background with precise faithfulness to the film that the diorama was based on. And check out the detail work! Way too much finesse and awesomeness here for me to handle. Awesome job!


(Click here to see a larger photo!)

"This Is A Bughunt"
Created By: Darth Poop

There's more to Darth Poop's Aliens-inspired opus than it seems! Don't let the first glance fool you, because there's a lot more to this than neatly organized action figures! Check out Darth's photo gallery, and you'll see what I mean. In fact, every time I go through that gallery, I realize just how much work really went into this. Darth, if you're reading, would you mind giving us a breakdown on how this was created?

As you browse through the gallery, keep a sharp eye and spot all of the crazy minute details, from the severed limbs to the Aliens lurking under the platforms! With all of the stuff happening in "This Is A Bughunt," it's easy to forget that everything's contained in one measly shoebox! I'm starting to think that I should just send everyone who entered a DVD and be done with it. :)


(Click here to see the full Die-O-Rama!)

"Graveyard Awakening"
Created By: Dymphnawolf and Aitora

Dymphnawolf and Aitora's intro: "It is a night time graveyard scene in which a grave digger takes a break from his grim occupation, unaware of the danger that lurks behind him in the form of a rotting corpse that is digging itself free of its resting place. If you look closely, you can see that the zombie is missing part of his head, leaving the contents exposed."

There's an odd and unsettling feel to this one -- it's as if the entrants used a time machine to pillage their diorama from some horror-obsessed kid from the 1930's. The antique feel definitely adds a creepy layer, and I'm especially fond of the toothpick cross in front of the open grave.


(Click here to see a larger photo!)

"Election Night"
Created By: Thorzul

You know, Thorzul, you may have gotten robbed. I think yours is going to be a fan favorite. In Thorzul's words: "I chose to think outside of the typical Halloween fright fest and depict what might possibly be the scariest thing I can think of."

Political and societal commentary aside, I'm enamored with how Thorzul so effortless turned a shoebox into a television set. It's no doubt the most uniquely concepted Die-O-Rama that I received, and I'm sure Thorzul wants to kill me for waiting so long to post it.


(Click here to see a larger photo!)

"Hallowbunga!"
Created By: Class3KillStorm

Class3KillStorm's diorama was one of several Ninja Turtles-themed entries. Here's his description: "Basically, the concept is that the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are having a Halloween costume party, and Raph and Leo aren't too happy about Michaelangelo's poor costume choice. Donatello was too busy making machines to attend; also, I don't own any Donatello action figures."

What Class3KillStorm didn't mention is that his Die-O-Rama glows in the dark! Course, the best stuff is hiding in the background -- look close and you'll spot a crayon-drawn Shredder and Bebop, putting aside their usual differences with the Turtles for the sake of a successful Halloween party.

Again, thanks to everyone who entered, and if you haven't seen your Die-O-Rama spotlighted yet, stay tuned -- it ain't Halloween yet!

Posted by Matt on 10/27/2009. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 154 comments

Darth Poop: I am in awe of your diorama. I thought me and my brother were the only people who knew what “sheet styrene” was. I am in my late 40′s, yet i try to get in a model kit whenever I can. And to let everyone know, what Darth did is what all model builders strive to do. Awesome. People, go to Darth’s Flickr gallery. Check out the stuff before. The pure green soldiers. The collection of stuff on the wall. The camo paint for the uniforms alone is huge! And the face details. That soldier up front with the black vest, the soldier in the back who has just seen the alien sneaking up. I mean, the look on his face isn’t terror, it’s like, “Hey guys, we’re gonna blast this MF’er”. (Despite the fact in real life he would probably get mauled). Darth, over the years, I’ve discussed with my brother how model building is a lost folk art in the U.S. If I ever become rich and famous, my “thing” would be to promote model building to give kids something real to work with, instead of vegging out with video games. Awesome job, truly!!!

RE: Charlie Brown- Since they all went digital in the Washington DC area, it seems the ABC affiliate said “Screw you” to everyone without cable, and they have turned down their power to the lowest legal threshold. We have not been able to pick up WJLA since last February. Screw you too, Channel 7!

Chestnuts roasted by Alexander @ 10/28/2009 5:21 AM


Robert: Leatherface predates the the other two (and virtually all others), and on a stretch, you could call him the very first “slasher.” His movie is probably more famous than he is, though. As for the “classic trio,” I’d swap Leatherface out for Michael Myers.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 10/28/2009 8:46 AM


My name in partially uppercase font! On X-E’s front page! I’ve never been so proud.

Also, apparently the folks a Pepsi got smart and Cranberry Splash is only out 2 months early. So it’s still temporary, but it’s temporary for longer. Granted, this is second hand information. But it’s still info. Hope you’re all having a good season!

Chestnuts roasted by PlantMonster @ 10/28/2009 9:13 AM


Great die-o-ramas guys!I do believe that is Splinter in “Hallobunga”.But,it does look like Splinter is wearing Bebops’s hat.Goob-I know the ones you’re talking about and I wouldn’t mind having the black and green one.Matt-If you decide that we are all worthy of being “winners”,I think you should give us random Halloween stuff rather than DVDs,because that wouldn’t be fair to the people who really won.But,hey,you’re el capitan,and thats your decision.Just a suggestion.

Chestnuts roasted by Jason @ 10/28/2009 9:17 AM


I missed Charlie Brown last night,even though I planned to watch it.I will watch it tonight being that it’s on at 8:00,and that’s when band practice is over. :)

Chestnuts roasted by Jason @ 10/28/2009 9:30 AM


starwenn: I lived without cable for at least five years until recently and didn’t even miss it. Then again, you’re talking to a girl who would rent chunks of Alfred Hitchcock Presents from Blockbuster.com. I think it’s safe to say I’ve always been slightly behind the times.

Jeff Mack: ME.

I can’t wait to hit up the Target post-Halloween sale. They have a black throw adorned with skulls that has my name on it.

Chestnuts roasted by Cheetara @ 10/28/2009 9:35 AM


I guess Leatherface doesn’t quite measure up to Jason and Freddy in “icon” status, but like someone else mentioned, the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre creeps me way more than any of the Friday the 13th and Nightmare on Elm Street movies combined.

There’s just something so gritty and deranged and f’ed up about the original flick that subsequent slashers could just never match.

Chestnuts roasted by tanta07 @ 10/28/2009 10:00 AM


i watched The Great Pumpkin Last Night.

I was thinking of writing a book called “snoopy comes Home” and Charlie Brown has to put Snoopy down at the end. Do you think whoever owns Peanuts these days would go for it?

Chestnuts roasted by braindead brian @ 10/28/2009 10:51 AM


I watched The Great Pumpkin, and even with the cuts i think it it totally worth it to try to catch it on TV. It really adds to my enjoyment to know that I am watching it just as I did when I was young. You can pop in a DVD anytime, but as a child the only time I was able to watch it was on TV.

braindead brian: I wouldn’t be as worried about the owners of the rights as i would the fans. While I don’t think the license holders would go for it anyway, fans would be asking for your blood. Who wants to live in a world where Snoopy can die?

Chestnuts roasted by drew do @ 10/28/2009 11:00 AM


That clown looks like a zombie Ronald McDonald. Ah, what an ad that would make. “Eat McDonald’s or McDonald’s will eat YOU.”

Chestnuts roasted by Phen @ 10/28/2009 11:42 AM


Matt, I thought your eyes had turned yellow until I saw that it was actually Jason under the mask. Spooktastic.

Chestnuts roasted by Faith @ 10/28/2009 11:56 AM


Politically motivated Halloween die-o-ramas? And in an off year at that? Lame.

Chestnuts roasted by Chris D. @ 10/28/2009 12:32 PM


It depends on what criteria we’re using in ranking the top 5 slasher villains? Are we going my movies only? How many people dress like them for Halloween? Icon status? I’m not sure Leatherface would even be in my top 5 based on any of the above.

Freddy and Jason are clearly the top 2.
I also agree Michael Myers would be a strong #3.
It’s passed that I think is where things get strange.
I would actually place Chucky at #4. Alot of people just like him.
I think Ghostface from the “Scream” movies would be #5. I see ALOT of that costume around.
I think Leatherface might actually have to duke it out with Pinhead for #6, actually, with Pinhead barely squeaking by. I guy with Pins in his head just look cooler to most people..

Chestnuts roasted by King JLA @ 10/28/2009 1:00 PM


King JLA-I agree with #1-#4.Ghostface might be in the top 10.Pinhead would definately be ahead of Ghostface just for the fact of being bad-ass.Leatherface might have to fight to get that #5 spot.Ghostface would mauled by almost any other horror icon.Consider this…Ghostface was basically a bunch of high school kids who bought a damn costume that was already in production before the script was even written.One last thing…Rose McGowan getting crushed in the garage door was the best kill in the series albeit one of the cheesiest.

Chestnuts roasted by Jason @ 10/28/2009 1:26 PM


The lip balm is awesome, as is the mask.

The die-o-ramas still kick ass. Kittymao and Darth Poop definitely deserve some sort of prize. And that is definitely Splinter with Shredder, dressed as a clown.

And I’m sorry, but I don’t care for Thorzul’s. Oooh, Republicans…scary! Your messiah got elected, your antichrist is out of office…move on, man. But then again, he thinks I’m a racist, so… /rant

Chestnuts roasted by Teddy Ray @ 10/28/2009 2:24 PM


I love the Graveyard Awakening Diorama! Feels like it’s from another era. Can’t wait to see the rest!

Who else has been listening to the Freddy album a lot lately? I first learned about it here last year and it’s really grown on me. I found a pretty silly and involved review of it this morning

http://juntajuleil.blogspot.com/2009/10/music-review-freddys-greatest-hits-1987.html

Chestnuts roasted by AllisonD @ 10/28/2009 2:33 PM


Has anyone else been able to find the IV bags of candy blood? I’ve been skunked everywhere I’ve looked.

Chestnuts roasted by tanta07 @ 10/28/2009 2:52 PM


Thanks for the shout out Matt. I was pretty devestated when I didn’t see it featured, and I appreciate your kindness.

If any of you are intrested, clicking on my name will link you to my blog- where I show the process of pulling the die-o-rama together…
and a short self-loathing post when I didn’t see mine appear.

Chestnuts roasted by kittymao @ 10/28/2009 3:26 PM


I saw The Great Pumpkin last night and I could definitely sense the Christmas retail push. All it was missing was this commercial:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bv5AhWUzpzY&feature=related

Oh, dag…That just started my Holiday mood too early. :|

Great job on the die-o-ramas!

Chestnuts roasted by Bill @ 10/28/2009 3:32 PM


kittymao – I had read all your stuff outlining the process of making the die-o-rama, and I too was shocked when yours didn’t win. It is awesome!

Chestnuts roasted by Muppet Baby @ 10/28/2009 3:40 PM


Oddly enough, I need some new lip balm. I hope my local drugstore has the monster cereal versions. Although since it is apparently flavored so nicely, I’ll probably go through it much more quickly than I would if I had some boring offering from Chapstick.

So, I am going to be a zombie pin-up for Halloween. Does anyone have any tips on applying a latex prosthetic to your face? I got one that makes it look like part of my face is torn off, exposing my skull.

Chestnuts roasted by DarkSideofBrightness @ 10/28/2009 3:50 PM


Kittymao – What I love best about your diorama is that it’s clearly recognizable as the scene from Night of the Living Dead, yet it’s given kind of a cartoony twist, to the point it almost looks cute. I say “almost” because despite the cartoon feel of the characters, the horror of the situation is still very much intact. You managed to do an incredible balancing act of showing a scary scene in an endearing light. You would have won in my contest! Barbara’s brother even has his driving gloves! Pure awesome!

Chestnuts roasted by tanta07 @ 10/28/2009 3:58 PM


Wow, more great die-o-ramas. Love the zombie scenes, and the Alien one is awesome. While not traditionally Halloween related in my book, the outcome is so packed with detail, I love it. The last one is ‘meh’. Rather than some holiday spirit we can all enjoy, it’s divisive and not terribly relavent at the moment. Shrug.

Chestnuts roasted by Dann @ 10/28/2009 4:43 PM


I missed the Great Pumpkin? Great. I’ve been preoccupied lately. The Master Control Program sabotaged my computer, so I had to put him back in his place. Those last few dioramas look good Matt. Maybe next year, I’ll enter one too.

Chestnuts roasted by Lonestar76 @ 10/28/2009 5:47 PM


So Nic Cage has a new movie coming out called ‘Season of the Witch.’ Unfortunately it’s not a sequel to ‘Halloween III; Season of the Witch.’H3 was definately a movie that deserved more credit then it got.

And remember kids to buy your Silver Shamrock mask soon, it’s almost time for Halloween.

Chestnuts roasted by Shawn @ 10/28/2009 5:57 PM


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