X-Entertainment.com X-Entertainment UGO
You are all doomed. Why not surrender? We might let you live.

05/26/2009: 88.1873006730561

I suppose the growing rumors of my demise and the 72 MySQL errors littering the site mean that I should probably, uh, write something.

As for why I haven’t posted — that’s a loaded question. A short break turned into a long one would be the simple answer. A longer answer would involve descriptions of the changing landscape of the industry I work in, and the copious amount of extra effort it’s taken to remain vital within it. It’s a personal journey and a boring story, totally unsuited to becoming a major motion picture, but the point of it is that the past several months have been so loaded with responsibilities that, bluntly put, I maxed out and couldn’t handle another.

I would never dare to say that writing about junk food and Krang is an outright responsibility, chore, job or anything of the sort, but there just came a point where if I had a free moment, I wanted to spend it privately. Being a go-getter is not my nature; I am, at heart, a lazy slug. But if I had to pretend otherwise, it could only be for 8 (or 9, or 12) hours a day. Not 24. I’d make a terrible Behrooz.

Then again, I guess it’s not brain surgery to package crap up all pretty like.

immat the library, do u no why??

my books r dewback lol

Anyway, finally, things are settling down, and I’m getting the itch back. I have big grand plans, but I can’t tell you about them, because if I break another site-related promise, I’d likely turn up dead. But, let’s roll the dice and try this much:

This Saturday, I will write about something. And you will tell me what that something is. Your options are:

A) Matt spends $25 at a Dollar Tree or some other such store, and describes his purchases. I’ve done it before, but not for years, and the statute of limitations has gotta be working in my favor by now.

B) Matt gets a new pet and writes about it. Don’t get your hopes up, I’m not buying a dog just to have something to write about. But it will be something alive.

C) Matt tries to find his collection of Kool-Aid; if he succeeds, he reviews a new flavor.

D) Matt builds a robot using only the materials available in his kitchen junk drawer.

I really hope you don’t pick “D.”

Okay, for the twelve of you who still read X-E, please, choose my adventure!


Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

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Discussion Thread: 402 comments

A! A for awesome! A for aubergine! A for asparagus, which I like to eat! A for.. pick A, dammit!

WOoooooo!!

I bought Halloween stamps last weekend. :D

Ghosted by LemonWitch @ 05/27/2009 12:21 AM EDT


new post!
a happy glow filled the land, leaving the people clamoring for A.

Ghosted by stina @ 05/27/2009 12:29 AM EDT


Yeah. A. Bring back the old days of X-E. Crazy junk from dollar stores.

Ghosted by James @ 05/27/2009 12:31 AM EDT


I had to look up dewback because I haven’t seen any Star Wars movies since I was really young, and that led to reading about Tatooine and then I ended up spending like an hour reading about binary star systems on Wikipedia.

X-E: Inspiring new levels of nerdiness since 2001. Or 2000, maybe. I have a lot of useless trivia in my head but that isn’t part of it.

Ghosted by jazzy @ 05/27/2009 12:32 AM EDT


Damn it’s good to have you back Matt, and I must with all my heart vote D, but B is a close second.

Ghosted by The Dude @ 05/27/2009 12:34 AM EDT


Welcome back, dear leader. You have been missed.

I am definitely throwing my hat in the “buy a pet” pile. Of hats. Or something.

I just totally want to see you buy another dolphin fish. And maybe a Chia pet as a backup. Plants are alive! It counts!

Ghosted by Evin @ 05/27/2009 12:41 AM EDT


OH SHI- He lives!
A for now. D would be amazing. Hopefully, that’ll be a later date.

Ghosted by MIKE @ 05/27/2009 12:46 AM EDT


Invader Norbert- What does “present-shaped” mean? Presents come in all sizes and shapes. In packages and bags! With ribbons!

Ghosted by PlantMonster @ 05/27/2009 12:46 AM EDT


B! Do B!

Ghosted by JMR @ 05/27/2009 12:49 AM EDT


Wow. In preparation to get some articles together for our Summer Megaparty tribute, guess what I just did. Went and spent about $25 at my local Dollar Tree. Got a bunch of weird crap I now won’t be writing about. I should just save you some time and send it all to you, Matt.

Ghosted by Chris @ 05/27/2009 12:56 AM EDT


Holy Monchichi he lives. I vote for (o)Other: cell phone pics!!! :o ) Ah it is a good b-day present,along with the MST3K box set from my Ma(!), to have our Matty-Matt back. If only for a little while.
Oh and Happy Birthday to all the other crazy little Geminis in here!

Ghosted by citygirl @ 05/27/2009 12:57 AM EDT


A

THERE CAN BE ONLY A

Ghosted by MrTroy @ 05/27/2009 1:06 AM EDT


I’m so glad the rumors of your demise were greatly exaggerated, Matt. ;)

PLEASE PLEASE do option A! I love your dollar store entries.

Ghosted by Nicole @ 05/27/2009 1:11 AM EDT


MATT!!!!!!!! My choice…do either the 25 dollars thing or get a hamster!

I was just going to check here, to see how the Mega party tribute site was coming along, and I see this dinosaur and a pile of books…

oh btw I have an idea for your 25 dollar spree…..there is an awesome (so I heard) Japanese shopping market flea market food store called Mitsura Market place…it is kinda near the Delaware water gap bridge…I think it would be an epic article to see all the crazy engrish labeled stuff and the neat candies and snacks.

Ghosted by mandy_Reeves @ 05/27/2009 1:17 AM EDT


B. and may I suggest a mantis shrimp

Ghosted by T.J. @ 05/27/2009 1:23 AM EDT


D! Build a robot, but don’t give it free will. Lots of pictures please. If you don’t get to it this time around, do it sometime soon.

Ghosted by paulandrew @ 05/27/2009 1:24 AM EDT


Welcome back! I say you go with C, I’d love to see a new pet, a mascot for the month of June, just no damn bugs. Yucky.

Ghosted by WolfMan @ 05/27/2009 1:24 AM EDT


Oopsy, I meant B not C.

BBBBBBBBBBBBB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ghosted by WolfMan @ 05/27/2009 1:25 AM EDT


Reviewing dollar store items while drinking Kool Aid. I want you to be refreshed.

Ghosted by Hey I'm Jeff @ 05/27/2009 1:26 AM EDT


C. It’s pratically summer, and that means it’s Kool-Aid time.

Glad to see you’re still kicking, Matt. I check every day for updates and will always do so, even if you go a year between them. Because you rock that hard. Don’t let the naysayers get you down.

Ghosted by Nicole @ 05/27/2009 1:32 AM EDT


Oh and by the way, this is not the same Nicole who posted up the thread a bit. So our votes should count separately. Who knew Nicole was such a popular name? ;)

Ghosted by Nicole @ 05/27/2009 1:38 AM EDT


A or C! We missed you Matt! My blog is not a good substitute for yours.. or even a little bit of a substitute for anything..

Ghosted by Cat the Vampire Slayer @ 05/27/2009 1:42 AM EDT


C

Ghosted by Bob @ 05/27/2009 1:50 AM EDT


“Present-Shaped”: Box with wrapping on it.

It turns out that mine contained a new HP Laptop! I’m posting from it right now!

Also, I choose C. Forgot to do that last time.

Ghosted by Invader Norbert @ 05/27/2009 1:59 AM EDT


I would say build a kool aid powered robot outta what you can find during choice A and name it fido. But that wasen’t a option so I really dont care if you write about your morning shit, its just jawsome to have some good old x-entertainment entertainment again!!

Ghosted by cluster schmuck @ 05/27/2009 2:05 AM EDT


My vote goes to Kool-Aid. You gottsta put them Thirsties in they place!

Welcome back, Matt.

Ghosted by Thorzul @ 05/27/2009 2:06 AM EDT


Gotta vote for “A” here! The $100 Toys R Us Shopping Spree mini-series from last(?) year was great. I imagine a bag stuffed with $25 worth of Dollar Tree crap will be just as fun.

Ghosted by Jon @ 05/27/2009 2:10 AM EDT


Matt: Glad to have you back! I am voting for option A. It would be perfect on several levels. 1. It would feel just like the old days 2. If need be it could turn into multiple posts with minimum effort and 3. Nothing beats random dollar tree shit! LOL Welcome Back!

Ghosted by slick316 @ 05/27/2009 2:18 AM EDT


“C” would seem like a good article, but I think “A” would be more interesting. Buy $25 worth of Kool-aid and make it all in a tank or something!

Ghosted by FOAME @ 05/27/2009 2:51 AM EDT


dollar tree i guess. kool aid would be great if you can find your collection.

Ghosted by silverlovingcup @ 05/27/2009 2:52 AM EDT


I really hope choices A and D come together like Voltron… the Voltron of weird plastic toy farm animals and bottle openers.

Ghosted by vicodinvacation @ 05/27/2009 3:04 AM EDT


Oh man! A or B for sure. Whatever has more points at the end (over C or D). A has the most potential for a long and awesome article, but B has the most potential for novelty/regret. Either way, I’m pumped! :D

Ghosted by Eddie Lightning Frog @ 05/27/2009 3:06 AM EDT


I vote A. Especially if you find stuff that has bad translation grammar or incorrect packaging and merchandise. (I.E. Superman Figure in a Batman Package.) Both on one package is a win-win.

Matt, could we make it so that if anyone votes for the unrealistic D, it’s an automatic vote for A? I wanna see Dollar Store crap, and the comments you’re likely to come up with.

Good to see you take a break with your fans, away from the horrors of the working world. Love the site! :)

Ghosted by fuyoutakai @ 05/27/2009 3:06 AM EDT


“Buy $25 worth of Kool-aid and make it all in a tank or something!”

FOAME, I think I love you. Then Matt could throw a party.
A, “Guess How Many Flavors is in This Tank” Party.

Ghosted by fuyoutakai @ 05/27/2009 3:09 AM EDT


A all the way! Grab-baggy articles like that always bring out some of the best (read – weird as all hell!) crap that everyone on XE loves so much!!

Ghosted by divechaz @ 05/27/2009 3:23 AM EDT


Option A sounds like fun. You always find cool stuff to write about.

Ghosted by Hope @ 05/27/2009 3:27 AM EDT


Fuck yeah dude! Welcome back, Option A all day!

Ghosted by Bartleby @ 05/27/2009 3:30 AM EDT


AAAAAA! if only i could count the times i bought stupid crap from dollars stores….

Ghosted by angrygoose @ 05/27/2009 3:32 AM EDT


I’d vote C but I don’t know how easy it will be for you to find that Kool-Aid. So I’m picking A.

Glad to see you posting again Matt!

Ghosted by Anthony @ 05/27/2009 3:36 AM EDT


its all about C. After being gone awhile you wanna do what feels most comfortable and C is definitely it.

Ghosted by sirdaveysockrocker @ 05/27/2009 3:48 AM EDT


lol i have to say “building a Robot” strikes my fancy the most!

Ghosted by theslutsmovieINdallas @ 05/27/2009 4:26 AM EDT


There is no option A, only Zuul!

Ghosted by Wysefool @ 05/27/2009 5:14 AM EDT


Finally. Welcome back from the dead! Uh… looks like Option A is winning.. though if you go to a Dollar Tree, I just hope it’s better than the one around here. They haven’t had anything interesting I a while… I’m liking option D, though.

Ghosted by Duskull @ 05/27/2009 5:35 AM EDT


Kool-Aid all the way. KOOL-AID!

Ghosted by Mike P @ 05/27/2009 5:41 AM EDT


THE ROBOT! THE ROBOT!

Seriously, I think of them would be pretty awesome, so write what you must.(BUT DAMN YOU IF THAT ISN’T THE ******* KITCHEN JUNK ROBOT!)

Ghosted by IareAwesomecakes @ 05/27/2009 5:43 AM EDT


D ! D! D! Work for it, baby!

Ghosted by Nightwane @ 05/27/2009 5:59 AM EDT


Hey Matt, I choose C before A. I like both, but familiarity and something I already own gets me back in the swing of things a lot more quickly, you know?

P.S. I’m going to NY for part of my honeymoon. It’s been a while. Any must-sees?

Ghosted by M.Fireball @ 05/27/2009 6:03 AM EDT


A and D- Twenty-five bucks spent at a Dollar Tree place and use the purchases to build a robot….

A, B, and D! Build a robot pet! That eats Kool-Aid!

E.

Ghosted by SaveALemming @ 05/27/2009 6:08 AM EDT


a or b

Ghosted by Anonymous @ 05/27/2009 6:28 AM EDT


as the Fonz would say.

Aaaaaaaa!

Ghosted by Nigel Chaos @ 05/27/2009 6:56 AM EDT


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