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I suppose the growing rumors of my demise and the 72 MySQL errors littering the site mean that I should probably, uh, write something.

As for why I haven't posted -- that's a loaded question. A short break turned into a long one would be the simple answer. A longer answer would involve descriptions of the changing landscape of the industry I work in, and the copious amount of extra effort it's taken to remain vital within it. It's a personal journey and a boring story, totally unsuited to becoming a major motion picture, but the point of it is that the past several months have been so loaded with responsibilities that, bluntly put, I maxed out and couldn't handle another.

I would never dare to say that writing about junk food and Krang is an outright responsibility, chore, job or anything of the sort, but there just came a point where if I had a free moment, I wanted to spend it privately. Being a go-getter is not my nature; I am, at heart, a lazy slug. But if I had to pretend otherwise, it could only be for 8 (or 9, or 12) hours a day. Not 24. I'd make a terrible Behrooz.

Then again, I guess it's not brain surgery to package crap up all pretty like.

immat the library, do u no why??

my books r dewback lol

Anyway, finally, things are settling down, and I'm getting the itch back. I have big grand plans, but I can't tell you about them, because if I break another site-related promise, I'd likely turn up dead. But, let's roll the dice and try this much:

This Saturday, I will write about something. And you will tell me what that something is. Your options are:

A) Matt spends $25 at a Dollar Tree or some other such store, and describes his purchases. I've done it before, but not for years, and the statute of limitations has gotta be working in my favor by now.

B) Matt gets a new pet and writes about it. Don't get your hopes up, I'm not buying a dog just to have something to write about. But it will be something alive.

C) Matt tries to find his collection of Kool-Aid; if he succeeds, he reviews a new flavor.

D) Matt builds a robot using only the materials available in his kitchen junk drawer.

I really hope you don't pick "D."

Okay, for the twelve of you who still read X-E, please, choose my adventure!

Posted by Matt on 05/26/2009. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 403 comments

You have to go with (A) Matt, I love the DOLLAR TREE!!!!

Chestnuts roasted by Spectre1979 @ 05/26/2009 11:21 PM


Welcome back Matt! Glad to see that you are alive and not wearing concrete shoes at the bottom of the river. I was starting to think a random fan had hunted you down and made you swim with the fishes for not finishing some of your works on here. I am definately on board with option A. Would be interesting to see your perspective on random crap. A throwback entry of sorts.

Chestnuts roasted by tigerfan @ 05/26/2009 11:24 PM


As much as I want the pet or Kool-Aid.
I will vote for Dollar Tree.
Most of the Dollar Tree stuff might just make it
to his kitchen junk drawer…….

Chestnuts roasted by TCoftheDEAD @ 05/26/2009 11:30 PM


Option A.

Welcome back, sir.

Chestnuts roasted by filmtrauma @ 05/26/2009 11:31 PM


How about other than a dollarstore what about a flea market or yardsale you can find tons of cool stuff at these places for cheap. Just an idea. Take care and glad to see you back.

Chestnuts roasted by joker6698 @ 05/26/2009 11:32 PM


Wooooot! New thread! Welcome back, good sir!

Chestnuts roasted by boingophile @ 05/26/2009 11:32 PM


C. Haven’t read a good, new Kool-Aid review in ages. Make it happen.

Chestnuts roasted by Cotter @ 05/26/2009 11:32 PM


So who was the promoter from the previous thread? Inquiring minds…

Chestnuts roasted by ArthurCluck @ 05/26/2009 11:33 PM


i felt angry, and a little ill, everyday i checked in to see nothing new.

the smile i wore seeing a new post was priceless. and the dewback joke, more so.

thanks, matt.

Chestnuts roasted by drunkula @ 05/26/2009 11:34 PM


Damn that’s eerie. I hadn’t been to this place in nearly a year…I couldn’t sleep tonight…for kicks I went into my old fav folder & here I am…

I’m glad you’re still going at it Matt. I know this site holds a special place in alot of people’s hearts. For our lost generation that really feels ignored & forgotten there is one beacon of hope: we can still come here & see both freddy krueger & master shredder while getting that warm fuzzy feeling. where else in the same place can you view ’80s chirstmas catalogues, the staypuff marshmellowman & still enjoy billy peltzer references? NO WHERE beside’s xentertainment.

best to you & yours matt. keep it going! you make more people laugh & smile then you will ever know.

Chestnuts roasted by gravexrob @ 05/26/2009 11:36 PM


Welcome back Matt.

Some good choices, but I have to go with choice A

I love those

Chestnuts roasted by Gralf @ 05/26/2009 11:36 PM


A.! A.! A.!

I haven’t commented in forever, but I join the hoards of people glad you are still alive. And willing to poll people for your ultimate fate.

Chestnuts roasted by Orin @ 05/26/2009 11:36 PM


Also, option A sounds like lots of fun.

Chestnuts roasted by boingophile @ 05/26/2009 11:38 PM


A. But dont limit yourself to just one dollar store.

Chestnuts roasted by dave @ 05/26/2009 11:41 PM


I was a-gonna pick ‘D’, but I’ll be nice and pick ‘C’.

Chestnuts roasted by zharicant @ 05/26/2009 11:41 PM


YAY!! What a sweet thing to see before bed – new words from Matt. Thanks for not having a nervous breakdown – we were worried about ya.

OPTION A OPTION A OPTION A! I recently re-read the article where you paid 5 bucks to fill a bag at a flea market – you do wonders with a small budget and ONE bag, I can’t imagine how fun having unlimited bags will be!

Chestnuts roasted by Muppet Baby @ 05/26/2009 11:47 PM


A! because i spend countless dollars myself there on useless crap all the time.

Chestnuts roasted by plcary @ 05/26/2009 11:56 PM


I’d be happy with any of these, but I think I’ll have to go with A.

In other news, this is totally the best birthday ever!
Welcome back, Matt! I missed you!

Chestnuts roasted by Rainbowfeet @ 05/26/2009 11:56 PM


Either A or B.

Chestnuts roasted by gingela5 @ 05/26/2009 11:58 PM


A – dollar market sweep would be tits.
Don’t let work beat you down Matt, we undertand you gots to make a living too. Post when you feel like it man, we aren’t going anywhere…Peace!

Chestnuts roasted by Toxicshlock @ 05/27/2009 12:06 AM


A! Dollar Store adventure please!

Chestnuts roasted by Patrick N. @ 05/27/2009 12:12 AM


Holy shit, new post!

Ooh! I pick A!

Chestnuts roasted by Annette @ 05/27/2009 12:15 AM


It seems A is winning. Can’t wait to see all the novelty goodies you’ll get. I just remembered when I went on a spendin spree at my Dollar Tree last Halloween. I bought A LOT of useless crap! lol. I love the stuff I bought though.

Chestnuts roasted by ULTRAMAN @ 05/27/2009 12:15 AM


Nice to see you back, Mattt! And me, too, I guess…

I graduated from College earlier tonight! It’s off to the real world for me… :(

Also, I came home to find a huge, present-shaped box on my table. I wonder what’s inside. I’ll post back later to spill the details.

Chestnuts roasted by Invader Norbert @ 05/27/2009 12:20 AM


Oh God, I was SO hyped for “D” till you said not to pick it, basically… but then I remembered the dog-faced cats! Go for “A”. It’ll be fun all around. :)

Chestnuts roasted by Ryane @ 05/27/2009 12:21 AM


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