X-Entertainment.com X-Entertainment UGO
X-Entertainment is still feeling pretty bad about those lobsters.

05/26/2009: 88.1873006730561

I suppose the growing rumors of my demise and the 72 MySQL errors littering the site mean that I should probably, uh, write something.

As for why I haven’t posted — that’s a loaded question. A short break turned into a long one would be the simple answer. A longer answer would involve descriptions of the changing landscape of the industry I work in, and the copious amount of extra effort it’s taken to remain vital within it. It’s a personal journey and a boring story, totally unsuited to becoming a major motion picture, but the point of it is that the past several months have been so loaded with responsibilities that, bluntly put, I maxed out and couldn’t handle another.

I would never dare to say that writing about junk food and Krang is an outright responsibility, chore, job or anything of the sort, but there just came a point where if I had a free moment, I wanted to spend it privately. Being a go-getter is not my nature; I am, at heart, a lazy slug. But if I had to pretend otherwise, it could only be for 8 (or 9, or 12) hours a day. Not 24. I’d make a terrible Behrooz.

Then again, I guess it’s not brain surgery to package crap up all pretty like.

immat the library, do u no why??

my books r dewback lol

Anyway, finally, things are settling down, and I’m getting the itch back. I have big grand plans, but I can’t tell you about them, because if I break another site-related promise, I’d likely turn up dead. But, let’s roll the dice and try this much:

This Saturday, I will write about something. And you will tell me what that something is. Your options are:

A) Matt spends $25 at a Dollar Tree or some other such store, and describes his purchases. I’ve done it before, but not for years, and the statute of limitations has gotta be working in my favor by now.

B) Matt gets a new pet and writes about it. Don’t get your hopes up, I’m not buying a dog just to have something to write about. But it will be something alive.

C) Matt tries to find his collection of Kool-Aid; if he succeeds, he reviews a new flavor.

D) Matt builds a robot using only the materials available in his kitchen junk drawer.

I really hope you don’t pick “D.”

Okay, for the twelve of you who still read X-E, please, choose my adventure!


Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

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Discussion Thread: 402 comments

1 2 3 ... 9

A. Various amounts of crap are always fun.

Ghosted by Michael @ 05/26/2009 10:21 PM EDT


A. sounds good to me, too. Dollar Stores are a treasure trove of wonderful crap.

Ghosted by Kevin @ 05/26/2009 10:24 PM EDT


B or C

Glad you’re back Matt.

Ghosted by SuperRecoome @ 05/26/2009 10:24 PM EDT


D! D! D! and, in reality, I really meant to choose…D!

Ghosted by Delkon @ 05/26/2009 10:25 PM EDT


Welcome back man!

Glad to see you writing again.

Ghosted by Chris @ 05/26/2009 10:25 PM EDT


Oh yea, and please do D.

Anyways, see you in a couple months!

Ghosted by Chris @ 05/26/2009 10:27 PM EDT


Your shopping trips are epic, so as much as I love Kool-Aid, I’m gonna have to go with A

Ghosted by Saint @ 05/26/2009 10:29 PM EDT


Option A has always been my favorite style of article. I vote for that.

And it’s amazing you posted, because just today I’d decided to stop checking and come back in a few months to see if you were around. You saved me a couple of clicks!

Ghosted by KeyguardActive @ 05/26/2009 10:30 PM EDT


Nice to see your cadence, Matt.

I got married a couple weeks ago and spent the honeymoon at Disney. It was like I was channeling X-E.

I vote A. It sounds the least time-consuming.

Back to Rhythm Heaven on the DS before turning in.

Ghosted by MysteryD8 @ 05/26/2009 10:36 PM EDT


Shit MATT!! Do the Dollar Tree and post it on the front page for the whole world to see! I always loved those grab-baggy articles!!

Def. still reading, still checking every day!

And now, back to Heather’s!

Nice Behrooz ref! Can’t believe how Tony turned out this year!

Ghosted by kidneyboy @ 05/26/2009 10:40 PM EDT


Welcome back oh creator of the marvel that is X-E!:D
Honestly, I’d LOVE IT, if you did D! But since that would be a little to much to ask of you since your SO maxed out, I’ll settle for A. MK? :)

Ghosted by ULTRAMAN @ 05/26/2009 10:42 PM EDT


Option C, I choose you!! :)

Ghosted by Mystie @ 05/26/2009 10:45 PM EDT


ooo i vote for b!

Ghosted by leota @ 05/26/2009 10:45 PM EDT


D would be the best thing ever, but A is an acceptable substitute. I love articles on ridiculous dollar store crap.

Ghosted by jazzy @ 05/26/2009 10:46 PM EDT


OH SHI- Its Matt, and He’s posting. Glad to see some new text, there Matt. As for your Adventure, I loved the last article about your trip to Toys R Us (If I remember correctly there was a Godzilla rip-off involved), so I can only concluded that the 25 dollars spent at a Dollar Tree or similar would be an article of epic proportions!

I CHOOSE YOU, “SELECTION A”!!
*Throws Pokeball*

I will be back on Saturday slapping the hell out of my F5 key in anticipation.

Ghosted by NintendoMan @ 05/26/2009 10:48 PM EDT


I’ll be satisfied with A or D. Or E. Yes, Option E, I can see you there…

Ghosted by PlantMonster @ 05/26/2009 10:58 PM EDT


Matt,

I’ve been coming here for years when I needed a dose of dopey eighties Americana – it’s nice to see you’re still around. I’m gonna suggest option A, but at a thrift store. Those places are da bomb. I recently bought a Man-o-War, Leonardo, and something that looked vaguely like a pissed off missing link between sharks and crabs for two bucks. And most of them had all their limbs!

Ghosted by daikiki @ 05/26/2009 11:00 PM EDT


I’ve gotta go with Dollar Tree. As much as I’d love to see you build a robot out of your random junk, I just can’t put you through that trouble. The Kool-Aid idea seems just doesn’t strike me as a “wow” post right now, so that’s out. I’d love to hear about a new pet, but as busy as you are I’d feel terrible if the poor thing (or things) wound up dead due to lack of attention. So I’m gonna have to go with option A. Although I DO have an addendum to make:

Instead of spending $25 at Dollar Tree, spend $25 buying random useless crap they sell at the gas station. I’m talking about novelty lighters, budget DVD’s, those cheap little toys that always seem cool until you get them in your car…you know what I mean. I think that would be an even more interesting article. :) Glad to hear you’re alive!

Ghosted by Stevezilla @ 05/26/2009 11:00 PM EDT


I’ll choose E…The Advent Calendar. This cliffhanger is worse than Who Shot JR!

Ghosted by kingchachi @ 05/26/2009 11:06 PM EDT


OMG! HE’S BACK!

Nice dewback joke. lulz

As for the vote, gotta go with D.

A is a close second, and that seems to be winning so far, so I’m down with that.

Ghosted by UncleGramps @ 05/26/2009 11:07 PM EDT


A! Can’t go wrong with the leader of the alphabet.

Ghosted by Hazard @ 05/26/2009 11:08 PM EDT


Options A AND D. Buy crap, and build a robot out of it!

Nice to see you writing again, Matt!

And LOL at the Dewback joke..I work in a Library so I am easily amused by librarian jokes.

Ghosted by Cameron T. @ 05/26/2009 11:08 PM EDT


D!D!D!D!

Spoon-bot would kick much ass!

And good to see you still breathe, Matt!

Ghosted by Tom @ 05/26/2009 11:12 PM EDT


D

the Dewback joke just made my day muuuch better.

Ghosted by xero @ 05/26/2009 11:13 PM EDT


Welcome back, Matt. Glad to see you motivated.

Ghosted by ArthurCluck @ 05/26/2009 11:17 PM EDT


You have to go with (A) Matt, I love the DOLLAR TREE!!!!

Ghosted by Spectre1979 @ 05/26/2009 11:21 PM EDT


Welcome back Matt! Glad to see that you are alive and not wearing concrete shoes at the bottom of the river. I was starting to think a random fan had hunted you down and made you swim with the fishes for not finishing some of your works on here. I am definately on board with option A. Would be interesting to see your perspective on random crap. A throwback entry of sorts.

Ghosted by tigerfan @ 05/26/2009 11:24 PM EDT


As much as I want the pet or Kool-Aid.
I will vote for Dollar Tree.
Most of the Dollar Tree stuff might just make it
to his kitchen junk drawer…….

Ghosted by TCoftheDEAD @ 05/26/2009 11:30 PM EDT


Option A.

Welcome back, sir.

Ghosted by filmtrauma @ 05/26/2009 11:31 PM EDT


How about other than a dollarstore what about a flea market or yardsale you can find tons of cool stuff at these places for cheap. Just an idea. Take care and glad to see you back.

Ghosted by joker6698 @ 05/26/2009 11:32 PM EDT


Wooooot! New thread! Welcome back, good sir!

Ghosted by boingophile @ 05/26/2009 11:32 PM EDT


C. Haven’t read a good, new Kool-Aid review in ages. Make it happen.

Ghosted by Cotter @ 05/26/2009 11:32 PM EDT


So who was the promoter from the previous thread? Inquiring minds…

Ghosted by ArthurCluck @ 05/26/2009 11:33 PM EDT


i felt angry, and a little ill, everyday i checked in to see nothing new.

the smile i wore seeing a new post was priceless. and the dewback joke, more so.

thanks, matt.

Ghosted by drunkula @ 05/26/2009 11:34 PM EDT


Damn that’s eerie. I hadn’t been to this place in nearly a year…I couldn’t sleep tonight…for kicks I went into my old fav folder & here I am…

I’m glad you’re still going at it Matt. I know this site holds a special place in alot of people’s hearts. For our lost generation that really feels ignored & forgotten there is one beacon of hope: we can still come here & see both freddy krueger & master shredder while getting that warm fuzzy feeling. where else in the same place can you view ’80s chirstmas catalogues, the staypuff marshmellowman & still enjoy billy peltzer references? NO WHERE beside’s xentertainment.

best to you & yours matt. keep it going! you make more people laugh & smile then you will ever know.

Ghosted by gravexrob @ 05/26/2009 11:36 PM EDT


Welcome back Matt.

Some good choices, but I have to go with choice A

I love those

Ghosted by Gralf @ 05/26/2009 11:36 PM EDT


A.! A.! A.!

I haven’t commented in forever, but I join the hoards of people glad you are still alive. And willing to poll people for your ultimate fate.

Ghosted by Orin @ 05/26/2009 11:36 PM EDT


Also, option A sounds like lots of fun.

Ghosted by boingophile @ 05/26/2009 11:38 PM EDT


A. But dont limit yourself to just one dollar store.

Ghosted by dave @ 05/26/2009 11:41 PM EDT


I was a-gonna pick ‘D’, but I’ll be nice and pick ‘C’.

Ghosted by zharicant @ 05/26/2009 11:41 PM EDT


YAY!! What a sweet thing to see before bed – new words from Matt. Thanks for not having a nervous breakdown – we were worried about ya.

OPTION A OPTION A OPTION A! I recently re-read the article where you paid 5 bucks to fill a bag at a flea market – you do wonders with a small budget and ONE bag, I can’t imagine how fun having unlimited bags will be!

Ghosted by Muppet Baby @ 05/26/2009 11:47 PM EDT


A! because i spend countless dollars myself there on useless crap all the time.

Ghosted by plcary @ 05/26/2009 11:56 PM EDT


I’d be happy with any of these, but I think I’ll have to go with A.

In other news, this is totally the best birthday ever!
Welcome back, Matt! I missed you!

Ghosted by Rainbowfeet @ 05/26/2009 11:56 PM EDT


Either A or B.

Ghosted by gingela5 @ 05/26/2009 11:58 PM EDT


A – dollar market sweep would be tits.
Don’t let work beat you down Matt, we undertand you gots to make a living too. Post when you feel like it man, we aren’t going anywhere…Peace!

Ghosted by Toxicshlock @ 05/27/2009 12:06 AM EDT


A! Dollar Store adventure please!

Ghosted by Patrick N. @ 05/27/2009 12:12 AM EDT


Holy shit, new post!

Ooh! I pick A!

Ghosted by Annette @ 05/27/2009 12:15 AM EDT


It seems A is winning. Can’t wait to see all the novelty goodies you’ll get. I just remembered when I went on a spendin spree at my Dollar Tree last Halloween. I bought A LOT of useless crap! lol. I love the stuff I bought though.

Ghosted by ULTRAMAN @ 05/27/2009 12:15 AM EDT


Nice to see you back, Mattt! And me, too, I guess…

I graduated from College earlier tonight! It’s off to the real world for me… :(

Also, I came home to find a huge, present-shaped box on my table. I wonder what’s inside. I’ll post back later to spill the details.

Ghosted by Invader Norbert @ 05/27/2009 12:20 AM EDT


Oh God, I was SO hyped for “D” till you said not to pick it, basically… but then I remembered the dog-faced cats! Go for “A”. It’ll be fun all around. :)

Ghosted by Ryane @ 05/27/2009 12:21 AM EDT


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