X-Entertainment.com X-Entertainment.com A Proud UGO Affiliate
X-Entertainment loves Christmas and will not stop talking about it, ever.

Jingle Hell.

I'm not sure if it's possible for me to have more to do between now and Christmas Eve, but I've decided to take it in stride.

I'm lying. I'm freaking. And I'm taking it out on everyone.

Right now, our main priority is whipping the apartment into shape for Christmas Day, since we'll be hosting dinner for the woman's family. I'm not really worried about the food aspect, because one way or another, that'll get done. What's concerning us is that our apartment is more of a place that should be studied than occupied, and trying to get it to the point where over a dozen folks can sit without setting off a chain reaction that will lead to some pointy statue falling off a shelf and killing someone is a serious challenge.

Whatever, we'll get there. I still prefer hosting Christmas dinner to going somewhere else, because it justifies all the money and effort we pumped into decorating the house with ceramic Santas and festive tablecloths. Plus, it's fun to drive the action. I like to play God. Perhaps I will spell "MERRY X-MAS" out on a large serving tray using nothing but prosciutto-wrapped breadsticks. And I'll spend Christmas telling everyone not to eat them because I worked so hard on it.

A few of you have asked for a status report on my Chia Christmas Tree, and...UGH. I don't know where I went wrong. I had such high hopes for this thing, but it just refused to sprout a full coat no matter what I did.

I have to take my share of the blame. I was so frantic about making my Chia grow correctly that I just wouldn't stop doing stuff to it. I kept adding water, kept changing its lighting, kept moving it to warmer/colder areas -- it was like a simple zit transformed into a volcanic lesion by my own hand. Had I just let the thing be, maybe it wouldn't look like the jpeg attachment of an e-mail to Chia Headquarters, demanding a refund.

But it isn't all bad. It certainly won't be used as a table centerpiece, but it's not like I need to hide the thing in fear of mass ridicule. Nobody has to know that it's already lived a full life -- I'll just pretend that it's still in its formative stage. Yeah, that's the ticket. Formative stage.

It's kinda symbolic of my Christmas season as a whole -- overworked and messy, but still somehow pretty and peaceful. Or maybe I just refuse to shit on a Chia Pet that comes with a light-up Christmas star. You don't burn bibles.

I'll leave you with a little reading material from X-E's Christmas past:

Santa's 900 Hotline!
A Very Brady Christmas!
A Family Circus Christmas!
The Pac-Man Christmas Special!
The Ninja Turtles Christmas Special!

Happy SNT. I have muuuuch to doooo.

Posted by Matt on 12/20/2008. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 249 comments

1 8 9 10

I would buy a Waiterbot or James Lipton shirt in the off-season. Probably not Mista Snowman, though. Mainly because wearing a CHRISTMAS MAGIC shirt in march feels weird.

Waiterbot is awesome year-round, though.

Chestnuts roasted by Cameron T. @ 12/23/2008 4:51 PM


I totally would sport a Mista Snowman shirt in March. Fuck it.

IT’S MISTA SNOWMAN!

Chestnuts roasted by kittymao @ 12/23/2008 4:55 PM


Matt: I would ABSOLUTELY be interested in Advent Character shirts! :D
kittymao:I would wear a Mista Snowman T-shirt the WHOLE YEAR ROUND WHENEVER IT SUITED ME!:D

Chestnuts roasted by ULTRAMAN @ 12/23/2008 5:16 PM


I would buy and wear anything you threw at me if it had an Advent Calendar character on it. Even Texas Mandarin or Man with Chicken! But definitely Waiterbot or that remarkablous James Lipton. In fact, I would wear a “Remarkablous” James Lipton shirt with fire coming from his arms every day of the year.

Chestnuts roasted by Shelby @ 12/23/2008 5:27 PM


Cameron T and Matt: That actually makes me feel a WHOLE lot better, thanks guys! I didn’t even think of extending the Christmas magic past the 25th, but why not? It’s not like there’s laws against listening to TSO and eating sugar cookies after the fact. I actually feel a lot more “in the spirit” thinking of it that way, because I think the pressure to enjoy Christmas NOW NOW NOW while it still lasts was just making me resent it.

To paraphrase Kuse from last year, I’m gonna bake some fucking cookies and then I’m gonna fucking eat them.

Chestnuts roasted by jazzy @ 12/23/2008 5:32 PM


I’m so still waiting on my OBEY-style Waiterbot head shirt! And I would rock a shirt representin’ Christmas Magic all year long. Even if they were on white backgrounds, yuck (looks over at all the white Obama shirts she’ll never wear again and wonders if she can pull off turning them into tote bags).

CONGRATS MYSTIE!!! I knew you could do it! :D

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 12/23/2008 6:48 PM


Front of shirt: clown close-up
Back of shirt: that wicked laugh of his

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 12/23/2008 7:21 PM


I would LOVE a Mista Snowman CHRISTMAS MAGIC shirt, at any time of the year.

Chestnuts roasted by KingTreehouse @ 12/23/2008 7:45 PM


mandy_reeves they don’t give you a grade, it’s just pass or fail. A lot of people at work were giving me a ration of shit about how it’s the hardest test they ever took and how horrible it is, but really if you’re good at coding and keep positive about it, it’s not that bad. Although 7 people in my company took it and only 3 (including myself) passed.

Chestnuts roasted by Mystie @ 12/23/2008 7:49 PM


#22 is up. :O

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 12/23/2008 7:54 PM


BIOLOGICAL FISSION!

Chestnuts roasted by jazzy @ 12/23/2008 8:07 PM


Holy crap. WOW.

Matt, you are absoulutely INSANE! 22 IS AWESOME!

Chestnuts roasted by PlantMonster @ 12/23/2008 8:14 PM


Woah, two mega advent entries in one day? Remarkablous!

Chestnuts roasted by glowsocks @ 12/23/2008 8:24 PM


James Lipton is Fucking Amazing.

Also, looks like Hare and Claire are now reduced to the evil bit players. Serves them right.

Chestnuts roasted by Cameron T. @ 12/23/2008 8:26 PM


Oh my god, that was awesome, will wait longer to discuss it!

Chestnuts roasted by Tresjolie9 @ 12/23/2008 8:32 PM


James Lipton is a GOD! Hurry up and read the entry folks so I we can all have our heads explode at the the sheer awesomeness of it all.

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Galvatron @ 12/23/2008 8:43 PM


That’s some Amazin’ Fruit right there, and we haven’t even gotten to Box 23! Remarkablous indeed.

Chestnuts roasted by Mars @ 12/23/2008 8:59 PM


James Lipton is the greatest person on the face of the planet.

RIP to Ted and not evil clown.

I had a good birthday. Got the Dark Knight DVD and a Superman novel. Also ate at Red Robin, the greatest burger place in the world.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 12/23/2008 9:00 PM


I always knew James Lipton would save us all…

Chestnuts roasted by Aaron @ 12/23/2008 9:20 PM


Yes, folks, please read the entry, so we could start discussing it spoiler free.

There is also taking over the Box 23 thread, and using that for spoiled discussion? Whatever everyone else wants. :-)

Chestnuts roasted by Tresjolie9 @ 12/23/2008 9:48 PM


Love 22!!!! I have never laughed so hard at the AC before. Go Lipton!

Chestnuts roasted by IHAQ @ 12/23/2008 10:22 PM


JLAJRC Happy Birthday.

So for some reason or another, I’m going out tonight and I’m already drunk, which is awesome, but not as awesome as Lipton saving us. You know, because eventually the conflict would have spilled over into our world. Only a matter of time my friends, only a matter of time.

I was really hoping Mista Snowman would save the day, but Fissioning Lipton is just as good…

Shit, I’m drunk and have to drink more….

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Galvatron @ 12/24/2008 12:10 AM


Happy birthday, JLAJRC!

#22 was, in a word, remarkablous.

Chestnuts roasted by Teddy Ray @ 12/25/2008 12:48 AM


Speaking of Chias, I spied this oddity at a Smith’s grocery store bargain bin in Sunset, Utah.

http://photos-c.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-snc1/v1937/87/110/203100142/n203100142_30258986_9564.jpg

Chestnuts roasted by Tom @ 12/31/2008 7:35 PM


1 8 9 10

Add A New Comment!