The X-Entertainment Blog

12/18/2008: The Christmas Story INFLATABLE LEG LAMP!

Because Christmas is a time for frivolous, regrettable spending. Because the neighbors have really stepped up their outdoor decorating prowess this year. Because I have blood and not ice water running through my veins. For these reasons and more, I bought THIS:

Look close. Look very close. Now do your spit take. Yes, it’s an official INFLATABLE LEG LAMP LAWN ORNAMENT, based on the bastion of electric sex from A Christmas Story.

Is it cheap? No. Few major awards are. But it isn’t much more expensive than, say, an inflatable Tigger-in-a-Santa-cap lawn ornament. This is so, sooo much cooler than some random, shitty Tigger. Like, ten thousand times cooler.

A Christmas Story merchandise has exploded in recent years, to the point where the truly devoted even purchase bars of Lifebuoy soap simply to decorate with. More commonly, people go for the Leg Lamps, which come in sizes ranging from movie-scale down to nite-lites.

I actually own one of the mid-sized Leg Lamps, and for a time, I considered it the classiest item in my personal inventory. Well, no more. Now I have seventy-two inches of bumpy, balloony Leg Lamp magic, and if there’s a way to depreciate the property values of your surrounding neighbors quicker than this, I haven’t seen it.

The Inflatable Leg Lamp Lawn Ornament™ fluctuates in price, but it’s currently on Amazon for seventy bucks. That’s where I purchased it, despite the reviews from previous customers who weren’t happy with their six foot blow-up leg lamp — a statement that sounds nearly like an oxymoron.

These joyless complainers cited slow pumping time and brittle lawn stakes as the reasons for their low scores, but come on — every inflatable lawn ornament is a cheaply made pain in the ass. Drive around your neighborhood one night, and count the number of blow-up snowmen with their faces in the grass. Frequent disappointment is to be expected with inflatable lawn ornaments. It’s the price you pay for those scant few moments when they work just right and make you feel like a holiday celebrity.

After letting the included electric air pump work its magic for a while, my plastic muse was ready for photographing. Get ready for the most monumental feel-good moment of the 2008 Christmas season: The fully-blown, six foot tall Christmas Story Inflatable Leg Lamp Lawn Ornament!

And now you know why God invented drum rolls. I mean, holy shit! Even with my horribly unfocused photo, can you not see that this hideous monstrosity is the grandest gift one could ever hope to receive?

It’s just incredible. The actual leg portion is filled with white lights, which shake independently from the rest of the lamp for an added touch of movie realism. It’s also enormous. It dwarves our Christmas tree, and due to its surprisingly phallic shape, it makes me feel like 1/100th the man that I did before I opened the box.

Are there words to describe this inflatable treasure? Yes, but only Ninja Turtles and thirteen-year-old surfers can get away with saying them. I’ll settle on this: <3 <3 <3 <3

Christmas is an an opportunity for us to be goofy without reproach, and a time when we can chalk our quirky splurges up to a sense of holiday spirit. Do not waste this opportunity — a chance to use all disposable income not on some lame certificate of deposit, but on a 72″ inflatable woman leg. And if not that, then pick some other ridiculous thing. The moral-ridden climaxes of holiday movies and TV specials might say otherwise, but seriously, this is what Christmas is all about.

OH MY GOD, I HAVE A SIX FOOT INFLATABLE LEG LAMP.

RECENT CHRISTMASSY FEATURES:
The Mr. Snowman Sno-Cone Maker!
Christmas Crunch Cereal: The 2008 Edition.
Humble Bumble’s Bumble Chase!
Spumoni Ice Cream?
The Chia Pet Christmas Tree!

Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

Note for those just tuning in: The Advent Calendar has been updated for 12/16 and 12/17.

70$? That’s a major purchase. for all that you do, you should have been awarded with a prize that magnitude.

Wow…70 bucks. I was really entertained by this, so money well spent. Christmas wouldn’t be the same without X-E’s Christmas decorations.

Is it safe to assume that the neighbors have an inflatable Tigger-in-a-Santa-cap lawn ornament?

You totally have to take pictures of leg lamp on display outside. It would be a shame to keep it inside and hide all that awesomeness.

Matt, you just made me jealous. Maybe next year, when we put up lights, we’ll get one. I would be so happy to own one.

I don’t know if anyone mentioned this in one of the Chia Pet threads, but has anyone seen the Chia Pet that grows an edible plant for cats? Matt, don’t your cats deserve this for Christmas?…The inflatable leg is transcendent, but $70???

Amazing! I just watched A Christmas story for the first time tonight! I want a leg lamp lawn light and I don’t even have a lawn.

Dude! I TOTALLY called it on Kuse when the AC began! Now back to toil and drudgery.

Well Aaron, I’m here in my living room ith the original Willy Wonka movie on tv. I got two ornament shape leg
lamps. One in a crate, and the other inside it’s
plastic container. If you want to talk about frivolous
spending, I got an Indiana Jones hat and a Hess truck
when I went to Florida. I also have a figurine of
Ralphie in his bunny suit.

Cameron T., during school today (EVERY school district but us had to go to school. The weather was HORRIBLE! And then they let elementary kids not even show up! Only middle and high school! That’s why we ALL get tomorrow off. Longer story for whose interested.) our World History teacher just played Pinky and the Brain because only a few people showed up. Today was awesome (kind of. Anyone care to hear?)

LoneStar76, I LOVE the original (haven’t seen remake. Should I?) I actually saw it at an outdoor theater when they showed it for free. Wow. Everyone has A Christmas Story murchandise but me. Actually, I got a popcorn tin and some Christmas cards. But no leg lamp. I’m missing out

Clockwork-
From what I’ve ever seen,cats aren’t all that wild about that grass for cats. I mean,they kind of eat it,since they kind of eat regular grass,but I’ve never seen any cat really get too excited about it.

Matt should really get some koreans to animate the advent calender one year. It’s just too good.

Here in the bronx, front yards are against the law. So, no inflatable lawn ornaments for ME. My favorite Christmas decoration is the ’70s style ceramic tabletop tree with the little bulbs that plug into the holes, and the demonic elves and machete wielding santa my brother got for me last year.

That is, without a a doubt, THE MOST AWESOME inflatable lawn decoration, I have EVER seen!

I knew it!! I had a feeling Kuse wasn’t himself. I had a strange feeling Kuse wasn’t himself. I thought imposter at first but then went with possession. I should have gone with my first instinct!!

The AC is awesome and the only thing that would make it even better, and the economy, is if Mista Snowman saves the day.

Darth Galvatron: If Mista Snowman ends up saving the day for everyone it would be CHRISTMAS MAGIC!

My front lawn doesn’t even belong to me. It’s actually my landlady’s, and we’re set too far back from the street for even inflatable leg lamps to be noticeable. I keep my decorating indoors. Not that Matt’s find isn’t incredible, or that you shouldn’t buy at least one fun, weird thing for yourself per Christmas. I’m going to see if I can find mine in the Vermont Country Store catalog. My best friend gave me a $25 gift card for them yesterday.

And the Advent Calender is also amazing. I totally did NOT see that twist coming. A spy in their midst! When did the real Kuse fall into the bad guys’ clutches? Maybe back when the diary pages ended on December 5th?

(Goes back to December 5th’s entry to see if there was anything stranger than usual going on…)

Hey, a survey just poped into my head. What is your dream lawn ornament inflatable? Mine is Sonic the Hedgehog Christmas. Him with a Santa hat on, with a sack full of presents and Chao climbing all around him.

that is a pretty damn impressive yard decoration, sir.. - it seems both inappropriate and magical at the same time.. - a true amalgam that equals holiday hilarity..

anybody watch that brand new Muppets Christmas special last night? - i DVR’d it in HD.. going to watch it momentarily with the wife and cat..

I’ve always loved the inflatable decorations, but never buy them (even when they’re on sale after Christmas) because they are just too expensive. You guys are gasping at $70, but I’ve seen some of them for well over 100 bucks.

Aaron- If you’re a fan of Tim Burton’s work, which I am, then you should see it. Don’t take my word for it. The
effects were good. One of Johnny Depp’s weirdest
performances yet.

More frivolous spending, those LED novelties that they
sell at the theme parks, and a cactus that sings Feliz
Navidad.

Review the World, I caught it last night. It wasn’t the best. But it was… something.

Matt, you never fail to amaze me with your enthusiasm for your frivolous purchases.

But really, I hate inflatable lawn ornaments. They strike me as super-tacky, and they’re such an eye-sore when it’s in the middle of the day and they’re deflated on people’s lawns. Ewww.

We have a leg lamp night light and a leg ornament. But for lawn decor? CHRISTMAS MAGIC!!!

Knacks told the new Santa on day 9 that Mista was mostly made of coconut shavings.

AG28… maybe Mista Snowman got tired of everyone chritisizing him. It’s the perfect crime. Oh, what will he do next?

Yeah, sorry PlantMonster, had to delete that one. :) It made the page go bananas.

aaaaah i love this site so much. i’ve been reading since the old days with that whale stuff. i just realized that this site is just as much a part of christmas for me as any other tradition i have.

I think I’ll stick with my tabletop leg lamp. Hell, even if I wanted one of these, I don’t even have a lawn (hooray for being too poor to own a house!)

I have always been tempted to buy the large version of the leg lamp, but that thing is so darn expensive. Someday I’ll probably break down and buy one. More than likely I will probably end up buying one when I return from the bar one night. I tend to be impulsive when I three sheets to the wind, and it usually ends up costing me moola.

Shows how attentive I am. I never noticed it before now. Well, at least it matches my VCR since I lost the remote and couldn’t set it back. That might prove dangerous come spring though, since I am so used to it being an hour ahead and its the only clock in my living room.

Jack- I’m glad somebody else noticed it. We don’t have inflatable decorations here at my home, because we’ve
been having alot of decorations robbed from people’s
front lawns in my city. Do you thieves really want to
risk becoming a Bubba’s bitch in prison for an
inflatable snowman?

Gremlins 2 is coming up on AMC after Big if anyone
wants to see it. Though it’s not Christmas themed
like the first film. If anyone wants a good laugh,
go to YouTube and download Cheech and Chong’s
Santa Claus and his old lady. Waiterbot, are you
gonna make a vlog?

It’s from the 2005 Marvel Holiday Special. Story in brief: The Avengers are having their annual Christmas party at Dr. Strange’s place, unaware that an out-of-control robo-Santa is hunting them down. Out-of-control robo-Santa, kids.

LoneStar76, someone stole out lawn lights (not Christmas) a while ago. That’s why we aren’t putting up any lights. And no other house had theirs stolen. I mean, people throgh mustard at my uncle’s car, put a dead rat on our pourch, etc. But apparantly, the owner before us was a bitch. I just fucking love my neighborhood.

I’ve tried to fix the clock before, but whenever I do, the entire Internet breaks. Instead, we just live in the future until time rolls back again. It’s fun!

A few years ago somebody stole our plastic light-up Santa. About a week or so later when we had a new one, they attempted to hijack him as well. But his plan was THWARTED ’cause my mom chased the bastard into the wood and he ended up dropping him.

Aaron= Tough neighborhood. DrummerJay= I wish I had a Cherry Coke here. The closest I got in the past few weeks to a cherry flavored soda was Wild Cherry
Pepsi. Of course, the machine wouldn’t accept my
change.

I mentioned Gremlins 2 a while back. Does anyone find
it funny when Billy walks into the restroom with
Gizmo, and a voice says, “Mister, welcome to the
men’s room!”, I don’t know if I really want the can
talking to me while I’m doing my business.

I got my Christmas story decorations near me. One of which is a model of the crate with the leg lamp in
it. When it’s opened, recorded quotes from the movie
play whenever the crate is opened. Sadly, Nadafinga
is not one of them. Nadafinga!

I fucking KNEW that Kuse was a fake. I just did. Damn, I want to get thid advent calendar laid this year, I love it so much.

My dad would have worshiped one of those inflatable leg lamp lawn ornaments. A Christmas Story was his favorite movie ever.

I’m not so keen on the inflatable lawn ornaments (after seeing a half deflated Santa Claus slumped over his reindeer’s ass or a Winnie the Pooh one with Winnie and Tigger on a sled and Eyore pulling it, squished onto a balcony. The way it was squished made it look very R rated) but hell! Even I’d want one of the inflatable leg lamp lawn ornaments!

If you could not tell by my other posts I am a hardcore Christmas Story fan(I have already watched it aleast 20 times). So this blog is officaly my favorite so far is Christmas. And now I shall become Mista Snowman for a minute…Get ready for the caps lock!

OHMIGOD, THAT INFLATEABLE LEG LAMP IS THE COOLEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN! EVEN THOU I HAVE SEEN IT ADDVERTIZED IN CATALOGS BEFORE. I HAVE TO GET ONE OF MY OWN OR POSSIBLEY COME ALL THE WAY FROM MINNESOTA TO ADDMIRE YOURS!….CHRISTMAS MAGIC!

You did not, Norbert, be honest. I didn’t know either, and I have no shame admitting that.

There’s a winter storm warning all day and while normally I’d be all, “WOOOOOOOOO” like a 10 year old wanting a day off school, I’m pissed because it was supposed to start already and hasn’t. I feel like an ass calling off work when it’s not even flurrying yet, but I’m not going out at 5pm traffic after the snow and sleet has been accumulating for my entire workday. My car has bad traction.

This was supposed to be the start of Holiday Break, well, after school ended, but now I just get some extra hours for it.

Honestly Matt,
I feel like Im feeding an addiction when I visit your site.
I hope you return half the stuff you buy, if not for your own sanity, than for the woman’s.

I was just reading the Advent Calendar at the front desk here at work IN FRONT OF PEOPLE and I completely lost myself in it and did this dramatic inhale-y gasp-y thing when I got to the big reveal for the 17th (think horrible B-Movie acting, seriously people don’t have this reaction in real life).

Oh god, thank god I wasn’t in front of people when I read the big reveal on the 17th!

Hey everyone! I’ve been M.I.A. for a while, but I’ve been reading. I just wanted to wish everyone here a Merry Christmas!! And Matt, great work as always bro. You got me through the work week!!

Santa was supposed to be in the December 24th box, but he came out of the 23rd box. The link below shows the order of what item is in what days box. So who or what put that Santa in the wrong box.

**Do not click on the link below if you don’t want to know what the upcoming gifts are.**

*whines* I’m so stuffed up…I don’t wanna use my Neti pot…it makes me gag…it works but I don’t wanna gag…plus I haz a fever. Ah well…better to let it run its course now and feel better for Christmas and New Years

I have a never before used neti pot. My husband got it for me in desperation last year when my head was a snot locker. The problem is if you’re that clogged, the neti liquid doesn’t go into your nose.

I can’t bring myself to use it. I think the idea is that it’s supposed to wash the mucus out of your head, via running it down your face. I can’t get behind that. I’m gonna put flowers in my neti pot.

The warm glow of electric sex.
You know what i’d want for a lawn ornament? I think I’d want the Rankin Bass Misfit toys. The spotted elephant, and the Jack In the Box and the wacked-out canary.

On the current note…
I’d use a Neti pot if I needed to, just to see how it feels.

Having been through Bronchitus and Sinusitis about 5 Bajillion times (Living in Dust-infested Lubbock, Texas will do that), I can tell you the way to beat that shit: You get a Cortizone shot, and a Z-pack. Pretty damn simple.

You use this pot to pour salt water in one end of our nose and it comes out the other.

I’d still want that Gift-Giving Machine from the beginning of the Garfield Christmas Special.

HFS the 17th was awesome. I thought Kuse might not have been Kuse. The question is who is Kuse if Kuse is not Kuse and Kuse is now green?

Counting the minutes since they are closing my offices early. It’s damn mess out there and I can’t wait to see what the Chimps with brain damage that run the LIRR do to make the commute home far more painful than it really needs to be.

I just want to get home and start my Sushi/Xmas Tree decoration date night with my woman started already.

Crayfish, me to! An extra day for Winter Break. Gotta love it! Now to open the Snow Day Chewys…

Ah, Invader Norbert, are you on the Box 23 thread? You should check that out for insight into who faux Kuse might be!

Darth Galvatron, I just noticed that. Ralphie also warns us “You’ll shoot your eye out!”

That leg lamp is awesome. I don’t care much for inflatable lawn ornaments, except MAYBE the snowglobes, but that one friggin’ rocks.

Mystie, I also want some electric sex. It’s electric…boogieoogieoogieoogie.

Clockwork, I’ve seen the Chia Pet grass for cats, but I don’t think my cats would care about it.

Rev., I very much want to see your demonic elves and machete-wielding Santa.

Electric Sex would be great, but at this point I’ll take plain old analog sex….

I wonder who it is that’s helping Hare and Claire out. Whoever they are, they’ve YET to make an appearance!

OMG! At nintendo.com, you can send a personalized wishlist message from Mario! It’s so funny. He never talked that much in his games. I just sent one to my friend, and I just can’t WAIT for the call back. God I love Nintendo. So, anyway, after my fanboy gushing is done, whats up with you guys today?

I’m about 13 minutes from beginning my 2 week vacation!! I plan on doing NOTHING and it’s gonna be GLORIOUS!!!

Aaron: Well, I went and got myself a strawberry shake at McDs, and then my Super Mario coin bank I ordered FINALLY came in the mail today.

Which version Aaron? The regular version, the MST3K one, or the Cinematic Titanic one.

I have SCCTM in both the regular dollar DVD style I bought at a grocery store and the MST3K version in the two disc Essentials set I got from my oldest sister last Christmas. What’s your favorite line? One of my faves: “I’ve got landing legs!”

Aaron: When you do start bidding on Ebay, a little tip. CONTROL yourself! It’s EXTREMELY temptin to but every random cheap thing you see that appeals to you. lol. I say this from personal experience.

Oh snap!! The Advent Calendar is getting spicy! I didn’t see that one coming, what with Kuse and Elephant and Lion. I’m so excited to see where this is going!

ULTRAMAN, lol ok. It will be hard, because I will be all over the Mario/Sonic/Pokemon/Nintendo in general sections. I love Nintendo. I can’t say that enough. <3

Aaron: Maturity and Immaturity are both in the eye of the beholder. Your parents are OBVIOUSLY NOT gamers! Otherwise they’d understand the awesomeness that is Nintendo.

Invader Norbert With some of the women I’ve been with, it would be totally possible….wait….that didn’t make any sense…

BgBlyStyle I’ve 2 weeks off also. 16 days of doing nothing but 360, Sushi, refreshing the AC until my fingers are bleeding and the paint on the F5 key is worn out!!

Aaron I’m going to have to try that. They had a similar thing before the Shia Lebouf and His Asshole Antics with His Shapeshifting Friends (AKA The Transformers 2007 Movie) came out where you could send people messages over the phone in Primes voice with some pre-set phrases.

Oh wow. An inflatable leg lamp. That is amazing. And I love how the box says “Fragile”. It must be Italian.

In other news, I got 52″ of snow at my pace in the last two days and I can’t get the satellite to work for the TV so the sound of true silence is deafening. Is this how people go mad?

Well Bill I hope you know where your DVD of The Burbs is. And are you buying me dinner next weekend or what?

We got snow in my neck of the woods to. It’s dark outside… now I can’t play in it

Watching the Star Wars Christmas Special now. Bad acting and all.

Darth Galvatron, a love those personalized messaged things. They are so awesome. I’m still in amazemint at Mario saying more than “Woo-Hoo!” Thats going down in the history books, mark my words.

I’m done with my finals and I think I’m staying out of public for a while because people are getting insane with their last minute Christmas shopping. I suppose I’ll just bum around while waiting for next semester to arrive, I’m planning on playing some classic Sonic games for the next few weeks.

I’m jealous of everyone who’s gotten alot of snow. I would just LOVE a BIG snow storm right about now.

I just saw the trailer for My Bloody Valentine. When I saw the film’s killer, he looked familiar, and yes it
turns out that it’s a remake of a film I saw long ago.
It’s a remake of an Eighties film with the same name.

I just saw Jeff Dunham’s Christmas Special on Comedy Central. I’ve forgiven him for canceling his
performance in my hometown some months back. And
now they’re showing Denis Leary’s Christmas special.

Speaking of which, Matt how about making so that we can actually do Less Than 3’s. I’ll even settle for them not being pink (though that would be ultimate).

Speakin of DVD rampagin, I recently picked up 5 Godzilla flicks. 4 of em are one 2 DVD, cause they’re double features. Think i’ll pop em in tonight.

OMG,I think Ultraman’s going to be watching Mecha King Ghidorah! I’m a little jealous. There’s nothing better than a damn Godzilla DVD with some chips or something.

Please, my friends, let’s spread our Christmas cheer to this little girl. It’s what Mista Snowman would do.

Matt Had to shave it my man. Stupid job requirements. It’s cool though. I did buy a wolf-scape t shirt to blend in.

Yay, #18 is up, waiting for it to load, but I’m starting to feel like Mista Snowman in my positivity.

I love the name “Texas Mandarin,” (only Waiterbot could’ve come up with that one) and the timely “Christmas Story” reference.

Okay, not even through 18 and my jaw has dropped Hare/Claire? At first there was the mere suggestion but now…..

And now for a more critical note. Is this commercial local only, or does it play where you live, too?

OK, I admit I’m a little relieved that it isn’t just playing here, and in my nightmares.

Sorry to hear about the beard, Bill. I’m sure buying me a half-dozen California Rolls will totally make it better because apparently there’s a sushi bar in KoP.

Oh god, now I’m having all kinds of nightmares about the nice magic carpet guy, who so neatly puts the carpet down on those commercials.

Hmm, over on the Box 23 thread there is speculation about a “Rosemary’s Baby” type situation.

Yes, we get those Empire Carpet commercials in NY, and I once heard they have it in the South. Despite the fact that it seems like a quaint local thing, it is really a vast global conspiracy to take over the world.

When you call them, I wonder if it is two little lab mice or are they rats who come to install it? One who sounds like Orson Wells, the other, not the brightest bulb on the tree, and has a cockney.

The thought of plastic incestuous, beastial, lesbian action would probably create a trainwreck of emotions, if I took 5 minutes to actually think about it. Fortunately, I haven’t had the misfortune

Remember that awesome Mare fanart from last year? Could that person do Claire? Please, please, please

I’m so excite where things are going and yet sad that we are coming up on the end. I know your busy Matt but this year has been so good I think we need some other adventures of the cast through out the year.

Aaron Thank you for sharing the Mario personalized message with us. I just emailed one to my best friend. It was so funny!

Bill I can watch tv for you and describe what is happening over the phone. Doesn’t that sound fun?

Goob, my pleasure. I knew X-E would love have Mario call us “little baby mushrooms” and then tell the reciever our DS demands. God I love Christmas. I just hope Nintendo does more in the future.

The Empire Carpet guy looks like Stan Lee,with CGI graphics that are both really high tech,yet outdated at the same time.

If Santa, Mista Snowman and Lipton don’t end up saving the day I’d actually be surprised,

I have a question. I forgot about the advent calender for the last couple of years. I know I am bad I have given myself a black eye for it.

I started with 2008 one after reading 2007 and I feel like I am missing something. Was there an adventure between ‘07 and ‘08?

jedimk
No, the 2008 calendar began “in media res” You aren’t missing anything!

Jed the only info between those two years is the clues released through box23. Guise made cliff notes up through the first here http://www.rogues.1me.net/XEAdventurers/Box23_2008.htm The box 23 thread which Matt has a link for off to the right can help fill some gaps or atleast provide theories. Matt’s claimed all will be revealed in the end though.

Jed, there is box 23, in addition carefully read the last 2006 entry, and scroll all the way to the bottom of the last box. There you will find a revealing picture.

Raccoon, or tanuki? If it was a tanuki of the mythic type, he might just be able to lend more than a hand. A whole sackful of tricks, one might say.

I want Lego Figurines!!
I want more Playmobiles!!
I want a Waiterbot!!
I want my sanity back!!!!

Well, I watched Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah last night. AWESOME!!! :D Gonna watch some Christmas flicks today and then do some Mario Kartin later tonight. Also, I think i’ll skim through some X-E Christmas articles too while i’m at it.

I live near Cleveland and I thought that those Empire commercials were also just a local thing!

Has anybody else here ever had a problem with Fedex. Every time I have something shipped to me by them its an ordeal. A third of the time they try to deliver it to the wrong address, a couple of times they lost my packages and had to reimburse me, and in my latest case a package shipped a mere hundred miles from my house is still in limbo after a week. I was supposed to get it yesterday and it was supposedly on the delivery truck, but when I checked last night they said it couldn’t be delivered because of weather. The warehouse they ship from is not far from my house, and there was NO weather problem here yesterday. It was in the late 40s with a light drizzle. And the roads were clearer than I have seen them in a while, since I guess a lot of people take off this time of year. I know shipping companies are busier this time of year, but I ordered something from further away that was shipped by UPS the same day the order from Fedex was shipped, and I received the UPS order the following day. If I have something shipped USPS, DHS, or UPS I never have a problem. In the one case I did have a problem with UPS they actually corrected the issue rather quickly. I was actually able to talk to somebody from the local shipping center who knew what I was talking about. That can’t be done here with Fedex. The phone book has two numbers for the local Fedex, one is never picked up and one is a fax machine. Is Fedex like this everywhere or just here? If I have a choice I never pick them even if it costs more, but some companies don’t give you a choice.

Wait, somebody refresh my memory. Are these empire carpet cleaning commercials the ones with the CGI old man that looks like Stan Lee?

Yes, thats what the Empire Carpet commercials in Maryland look like. I too thought they were a local company. The commercials just have that feel to them for me.

Ultraman-
Godzilla Vs. King Ghidorah is so awesome. I love that running bionic dude. Wow now I wanna fire up the Godzilla Wii game. I wish that had online play!

“Low intensity piledriver” cracked me up! Awesome stuff right there. You da man Matt!

Oh my GOD, I HAVE THIS LAMP!!! We bought it last year from Chapters after Christmas and were so pumped about setting it up this year … and then discovered that we’ve no idea where the fucker is since we moved. Aaaaagh!

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