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Halloween Countdown ’08: Music, Monsters and Bugs.

For the past few years, our Halloween Jukebox has given me all the eerie audio I need to get through the season. And yet, every year, I still find myself picking up some lame Halloween "party mix" CD, either to honor a personal tradition or because I'm kind of an idiot with money.

You know what these albums are like. You've all owned at least one of 'em. Filled with classic Halloween songs (or at least borderline Halloween songs) performed by random faceless studio acts and stuffed with horribly out of place sound effects, they've been a staple of my Halloween experience for as long as I can remember.

The track listing is always the same, the CD cover art is always hokey, and there's always at least one song performed with such a vigorous level of cheese that you feel shame while listening to it even when nobody else is home. I love these albums and I always will. They inspire me to wear nylon capes that I'll never actually wear, and plan for Halloween parties that I'll never actually throw.

Whatever. Anticipation is 9/10ths, and if some ridiculous CD featuring a vampire wearing candy corn fangs on the cover can help fill my October with luscious daydreams, I see no problem with spending $10 to hear the Jumping Jam Jeewillies' take on Love Potion #9.

During that recent outing to the Spirit store, I picked up a few packages of Halloween party favors, which Spirit has dutifully wrapped in neat black nets with creepy header cards. They're pretty steep in price (a handful of rubber mice was selling for seven bucks), but the quality level is awesome.

Spirit carries everything from severed fingers to plastic bats in this style of packaging, but I think the two batches I chose stood high above the rest: Monster Finger Puppets, and FLIES!

The "Monster Finger Puppets" are truly tingle-worthy. You get a bag of 20 for five bucks, and if my math is right, this means that each finger puppet cost me a quarter. Not bad. They're the ultimate vending machine prizes, and they cost not a drop more than even the shittiest vending machine prizes. The puppets are really ghoulish, with grey/green skin and all sorts of pleasant zombie features.

Course, the real litmus test of any finger puppet is whether its manufacturer took adult consumers into consideration. I can confirm that the puppet holes are indeed large enough to slip over adult fingers. It might take a little effort, and your fingers might make the monsters bulge like those weird red guys from Dig Dug, but whether you're five or fifty, you can put on a stupid puppet show all the same.

You might not think that a bag of FLIES is as cool as a bag of undead finger puppets, and...yeah, you're right. They're definitely not as cool. But then, there are few things cooler than green zombie heads with exaggerated arms who slip over your pinkies and dance at your discretion. Still, for the same price as twenty of those amazing puppets, you get forty flies. Forty flies! A bargain and a Scattergories victory!

The flies are of the impossibly oversized variety, which is the leading reason why I bought them. They're a bit more misshapen than I could notice when they were piled in a black net, but it's not like I had much use for rubber flies in perfectly natural poses.

I'm not sure where my 20 Monster Finger Puppets and 40 FLIES will be in a year, but I'm glad they're here now.

Posted by Matt on 10/08/2008. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 83 comments

Gotta disagree. The teeth alone make those flies infinitely cooler.

Chestnuts roasted by Eddie Lightning Frog @ 10/08/2008 11:19 PM


Those puppets remind me of something similar I had in my youth.  And those flies…those flies are the ultimate lesson in “buyer’s remorse”.  You think “great!  I get 40 flies for a cheap price!” at first, but once you get home you say “fuck!  What am I going to do with 40 rubber flies?” 

Get 40 rubber penises, maybe?  (rimshot)

Chestnuts roasted by Steve S. @ 10/08/2008 11:21 PM


Does the CD have Monster Mash and One Eyed One Horned Flying Purple People Eater? That’s rhetorical: EVERY Halloween CD has those two songs. Three day weekend coming up, so I’ll need to look for a Spirit in A-Town.

Chestnuts roasted by Ben @ 10/08/2008 11:22 PM


I bet Warren Zevon never dreamed that he would be on the cover of a Halloween CD. Good for him.
And I hate flies more than spiders. Blech! Now that gives me the willies.

Chestnuts roasted by Bill @ 10/08/2008 11:23 PM


I’m going to need more fingers.

Chestnuts roasted by Farmer Iggy @ 10/08/2008 11:24 PM


The head finger puppet in the front looks quite a bit like the monster from “Basketcase.” to me.

The teeth is what makes those flies creepy. Vampire flies, maybe? Do flies even have teeth?

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 10/08/2008 11:26 PM


I’ll have to agree with Steve S with the flies. Incidentally, if y’all didn’t know, my real name happens to be Steve. But the name you read below is what you know me as here, and I like it. But then in my blog, I’m Galileo, and on WordPress I’m “In10Words aka ‘Galileo.’” The mind boggles.

On another topic…Pushing Daises was awesome tonight.

Chestnuts roasted by Invader Norbert @ 10/08/2008 11:27 PM


Steve S.: Buyers remorse?  Naaahhh, just think of the possibilities.  You could recreate the Mist, or play tricks on people, or glue them to walls, or tie them to ceiling fans, or freeze them in ice cubes, or tape them to your forehead.  The possibilities are endless!  The only thing you can do with the zombies is go “Hey dude, AAUAUUUGGGHGHHH” then you’re done.

Chestnuts roasted by Eddie Lightning Frog @ 10/08/2008 11:28 PM


The head finger puppet is definitely Belial-esque, and I noticed that, too.  In fact, I was going to put that in, but I thought that I already used a Belial comparison with yesterday’s Lava Beast action figure.  Now that I look back, I didn’t, and now I’m sad.  But yeah, he totally looks like Belial.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 10/08/2008 11:28 PM


Sorry, that second Eddie post was me.  We live together, and I forgot to change his name on the auto form.

Chestnuts roasted by polkalessons @ 10/08/2008 11:31 PM


Stick the monster puppets onto the heads of action figures.

When I was little, that was gold.

Chestnuts roasted by nick @ 10/08/2008 11:41 PM


Speaking of spooky CDs, there was a disco record from the monster cereals released back in the late 70s early 80s (like the word disco doesn’t imply that anyway)  Why is that not imortalized on a CD?  The thought of Booberry doing the hustle is enough to get anybody in the season. 

Chestnuts roasted by Jack @ 10/08/2008 11:42 PM


whenever your done with the halloween countdown matt… i would love to see an article about the swampthing action figures… i had them when i was a kid… theyre based on the 5… yes thats right 5 episodes of the swamp thing cartoon that actually saw the light of day… and while the cartoon was nothing great, those were some of the greatest action figures i ever owend… seriously… i was getting a little old for action figures at that point but these figures where so great i had to have them anyway… i hope to see an article about them soon.. if i can find any of them at my moms house i’ll send you pictures….
-TOmmy!

Chestnuts roasted by TOmmy! @ 10/08/2008 11:43 PM


Anyone remember those face finger puppets? They were skin-colored puppets that would fit over 3 of your fingers, and they were just a face. Usually pretty normal looking, but man they were creepy. You basically made them talk……and for some reason they all looked like they were french.

Chestnuts roasted by Nickelodeon @ 10/08/2008 11:43 PM


So, a Monster Mix CD AND party favors?  Are you secretly toying with the idea of having a Halloween party this year? And this is pretty random, but Google has a special search feature up since it’s their birthday.  You can search from their archives in 2000.  If you do an x-e search, it doesn’t come up first but you do get links to a Star Wars Christmas Special review and an interview with Optimus Prime.  Matt, it also has some links to people reviewing the site back then.  Pretty nice to read flattering reviews that go back that far.  And, well, it just made me laugh to hear you call ultra magnus a fucking pussy.

Chestnuts roasted by velouria_78 @ 10/08/2008 11:43 PM


Basket case 2 and 3 have scarred me much like GPK the movie scarred Matt. Grammy Ruth and the freaks still bother me.

Chestnuts roasted by Bill @ 10/08/2008 11:43 PM


The finger puppets don’t need to be put on fingers. I like them just flat on the table, it looks like the zombies are trying to escape from the ground. I can just see these guys in a plot for the Christmas advent, they need to interact with Mista Snowman! Also, I would like to make mini head stones for each one!

Chestnuts roasted by IHAQ @ 10/09/2008 12:00 AM


A new Friday the 13th is comming out? I must been under a rock.  I wish it got here sooner every theater around has that dumbass talking dog movie. Being I’m off work today Im just gonna watch my DVD clockwork orange at home on the big screen and eat leftover kung pow chicken & lo-mein. Nothing worth seeing in the theaters anywho. BTW Morris says hi.

Chestnuts roasted by Turtle Loving Zombie Boy @ 10/09/2008 12:11 AM


NPR had a quick spot on about how Spirit stores have been able to predict the outcome of the presidential election for years by the percentage of masks sold per candidate.

Obama’s in the lead so far.

You can listen for it – Morning Edition October 7.

Chestnuts roasted by Jess @ 10/09/2008 12:15 AM


Nickelodeon - I totally know what you are talking about. Always had longish red noses, some with wrinkles. Worth nothing but nightmares I tell ya.

Chestnuts roasted by Jess @ 10/09/2008 12:25 AM


Anybody else think the Zombie with the blue rings around his eyes looks like Abe Vigoda?

Chestnuts roasted by Patrick N. @ 10/09/2008 12:37 AM


Wow, a zombie monster head for each finger and toe?  Brilliant!

Gee Matt, you sure do make this pneumonia crap easier to deal with.  Thanks buddy!

Chestnuts roasted by Captain Will @ 10/09/2008 12:42 AM


Awesome finds, Matt. Those flies give me the creeps too, not helped by the occasional flies I get in my apartment. Though I’m sure the ones around here don’t have teeth. I think.

And yes, I have one of those Halloween CDs, too, only mine’s on cassette. It doesn’t have “Purple People Eater,” but it does have “Monster Mash,” a passable version of “Bad Moon Rising,” and, for some reason, “Macho Man.”

Chestnuts roasted by starwenn @ 10/09/2008 12:51 AM


Speaking of the Monster Trio, a Target near me has all 3 Monster Cereals!!! All is right with the world.

Chestnuts roasted by Invader Norbert @ 10/09/2008 12:56 AM


Yes, there is a new Friday the 13th movie coming. It’s a remake of the original film. Nana Visitor (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine) is playing Jason’s mother. Matt, you should do an article on the Mad
Scientist toyline. It was from the Eighties, and it featured sets like
Dissect An Alien and Monster Lab.

Chestnuts roasted by LoneStar76 @ 10/09/2008 1:29 AM


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