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My dying wish is for an owl/camel hybrid, which I call camowl.

X-E’s ’08 Summer Megaparty: Worst Survey Ever.

Okay, remember the infamous sandwich survey from a while back? Well, here's another -- and it's fifty times more convoluted. (I hate doing an aside so early, but I may have to ban myself from using the word "convoluted." It seems to creep its way into every entry.)

From the exact same Betty Crocker cookbook from the 1600s, there's a "special helps" section near the end of the book detailing what was -- at the time -- considered the proper types and amounts of food to eat from each of the four food groups. I don't know how Betty made all these plates of raw spinach and fish sticks look so appetizing over a dulled yellow background, but by God, Crocker knows kitchen karate.


Here's how this survey will work, and like I said, it's the c-word.

Your challenge: To the specs below, pick the full run of food you will eat in a day. Assume that things like salt, pepper, oil and vinegar are okay to add -- but nothing else.

Over the course of one day, you've been allotted the following:

MEATS GROUP: Two servings, so you can pick two different things, or two of the same thing. For those curious, that shit in the lower left is canned tuna.

BREADS GROUP: Four servings. The stuff that looks like eggs is rice. The spoonful of dirt is wheat germ. Like you're gonna pick that over Cheerios.

FRUITS AND VEGETABLES GROUP: Four servings. The leafy stuff is spinach.

MILK GROUP: Two servings. Stuff in the upper left is plain yogurt.

So, pick two meats, four breads, four fruits/veggies, and two milks. What an amazing survey!

In your responses, break it down by meals. I'll go first.

BREAKFAST: The two stupid eggs, because I was sold on the paprika, and an apple. (1 MEAT, 1 FRUIT/VEGGIE.)

LUNCH: The bowl of Cheerios, the two cubes of cheddar, and that plate of cute carrots. (1 BREAD, 1 MILK, 1 FRUIT/VEGGIE.)

DINNER: First, I will toast that giant piece of bread. Then I'll create some semblance of a meal by placing the burger on top of the bread, along with a slice of Swiss, and some of the spinach. I'll use the remaining spinach and another plate of carrots to make a salad. And all will be well. (1 BREAD, 1 MEAT, 1 MILK, 2 FRUIT/VEGGIE.)

SNACKS: Without much leftover, I'll take the waffle and another bowl of Cheerios, and an extra apple. (2 BREAD, 1 FRUIT/VEGGIE.)

And there you have it.

Your turn, assuming you can make sense out of this. Try to justify your answers and give reasons, because a list of foods from 100 people could get a little daunting otherwise.

Maybe I should've reviewed the Amy Monkey Congo figure instead?

Posted by Matt on 08/03/2008. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 232 comments

I was going to post in here and say Matt, you should take however long you want to post again, so that you don’t get burned out before Halloween. But then I saw that someone already said that.

Chestnuts roasted by wydren @ 08/09/2008 11:41 AM


This is a great site. It’s been a great Mega Party and he deserves a good break.

Looking back, i been going this great website since 8 years ago. I remember the first article i read from this site….hey, it is still around! :)

http://www.x-entertainment.com/messages/15.html

Chestnuts roasted by I love Clay Aiken @ 08/09/2008 12:06 PM


Bernie Mac has died at age 50, complications due to pneumonia.

That SUCKS! R.I.P.

Chestnuts roasted by Doc Scarealot @ 08/09/2008 12:29 PM


So sad.

Chestnuts roasted by I love Clay Aiken @ 08/09/2008 2:52 PM


You know, Mike Douglas used to make me moist when I’d watch his show.

Chestnuts roasted by Grandma Klump @ 08/09/2008 5:33 PM


Any hope for a new SNT tonight?

Chestnuts roasted by Cameron T. @ 08/09/2008 7:33 PM


Anyone else watching the Olympics tonight?

I just watched Misty May and Kerri Walsh kick some butt and win their opening match against Japan.

Chestnuts roasted by TF (aka Magic Toy) @ 08/09/2008 9:40 PM


TF
Yes, I am basically getting fat watching these athletes be awesome.

Chestnuts roasted by kb @ 08/09/2008 9:50 PM


Hell yes I am watching the Olympics! I love the damn things.

The opening ceremonies were spectacular!

Chestnuts roasted by Cameron T. @ 08/09/2008 9:55 PM


Cool, so I am not alone. Now time to see what Michael Phelps has got for us…

Chestnuts roasted by TF (aka Magic Toy) @ 08/09/2008 10:03 PM


lol…Grandma klump…he was the only white man that made me moist.

How come in the Bernie Mac tributes I have seen all day, no mentions Mr 3000 ? that was a fun movie

Chestnuts roasted by mandy_Reeves @ 08/09/2008 11:33 PM


I don’t like sports. I don’t like the Olympics.

Seems a simple enough equation, to me~

Except that one thing. I hope Eli Manning had a great offseason. He deserves something spectacular, mir?

Chestnuts roasted by Neg @ 08/10/2008 12:01 AM


Neg
See, I’m weird. I don’t like sports–well, except possibly NCAA basketball–and rarely watch them on TV. But when the Olympics are around I go all out. I don’t know, maybe it’s the international aspect of it or just the way the media plays it up, but I love watching anything olympics, even the most boring sports…

Chestnuts roasted by Cameron T. @ 08/10/2008 12:44 AM


I guess I can understand that the Olympics aren’t for everyone. Some just don’t like sports at any level – whether playing or watching. That is totally fair.

I just enjoy watching the games — even the sports that I don’t normally pay attention to — because I try to keep in mind that these men and women dedicate so much of their lives to representing themselves, and their country, for these few weeks. The least I can do is watch them and cheer for the United States of America.

Also I just love the “idea” of the Olympic games. Sure, far too often the games are influenced by politics, but in spirit it is a GREAT concept. Even if the athletes from the US do not win, I enjoy watching these amazing people do everything in their power to represent their homeland.

Chestnuts roasted by TF (aka Magic Toy) @ 08/10/2008 1:03 AM


Neg, I bet we could find something you’d like. Fencing? Archery? I’m watching Badminton right now.

Chestnuts roasted by dohopoki @ 08/10/2008 1:04 AM


Is pokemon coordinating an olympic sport, yet?

Oh yeah, I forgot. It isn’t even something worth doing at all. Only wireless support?!?!?

They need to be MAJORLY revamped. Probably only something on a console could do them justice, tbh. Getting them WiFi would be a meager start, though.

Chestnuts roasted by Neg @ 08/10/2008 2:30 AM


You can’t coordinate WiFi? That sucks. Even though it was limited on the GBA, I rather liked the aspect, playing with various blocks and berries, making use of some otherwise useless moves.

Chestnuts roasted by dohopoki @ 08/10/2008 3:18 AM


First!

Chestnuts roasted by Arnold! @ 08/10/2008 8:23 AM


Who needs to plan your meals? I live day to day by my wits!

Chestnuts roasted by Bert Raccoon @ 08/10/2008 8:56 AM


Add me to the camp that would rather have more sparse updates now than have Matt burn out before Halloween.

This is one of few sites that I actually check daily for updates like a desperate high school girl waiting by the phone.

Chestnuts roasted by Johee @ 08/10/2008 11:35 AM


Hey kids, just wanted to drop you all a line to let you know I haven’t fallen off the face of the earth. I’ve got some problems with my internet at the house (I’m at work right now) and have been really busy with work lately. Plus, I got a PS3 and I’m walking around in a bleary-eyed gaze with my hands frozen in a controller-grip position. Hopefully I can get the net up and running again and tear myself away from the PS3 long enough to get back in the swing of things with you guys this weekend.

I’m really missing this nuthouse.

Chestnuts roasted by DJ D @ 08/10/2008 3:39 PM


Heya Deej!

Chestnuts roasted by JoshC @ 08/10/2008 3:55 PM


I hate the Olympics. Now, the Laff-a-lympics, that was a concept I could get behind.

Scientologists dedicate so much of their lives to representing themselves and their “religion”, but I don’t support them either.

Chestnuts roasted by Teddy Ray @ 08/10/2008 4:32 PM


PS3 has games?!? When did this happen?

Oh, how far I’ve come since my days of FF induced Sony fandom~

And, nope, they aren’t WiFi, Doho. I really want a Wii coordinating game where you can combine attacks like they do in the anime ;_;;

Chestnuts roasted by Neg @ 08/10/2008 4:39 PM


Just read that Isaac Hayes just died, also. RIP, along with Bernie Mac.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 08/10/2008 5:39 PM


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