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X-E’s ’08 Summer Megaparty: Why So Cerealous?


Thank you, Cinnamon Toast Crunch. After my horrible failure with Reese's Puffs, I've finally procured my very own Joker cereal toy. It's the version that karate chops, which isn't as life-changing as the version that karate kicks, but beggars can't be choosers. And though I stand by my initial comment that Mr. Joker looks a tad too much like that demon boy from the end of Pet Semetary, I concede that any toy that looks that way is a fairly interesting artifact to yank out of a children's cereal box.

Now, I have questions for YOU.

1) East coast folks: I really want to go back to Wildwood, but it's been a while and I'm wondering what the current "climate" is like. Not in the weather sense. I know they tore down many of my beloved hotels, but has the boardwalk changed much? My brain's been pretty mucky this week, and I need to reset it by browsing 99 cent stores and looking at the sad remnants of the Golden Nugget.

2) Everyone: Okay, I'm determined to find out what this is. At some point long ago, Good Humor came out with "Vampire's Secret" bars, which as I understand it were a type of popsicle with "blood" cherry goo inside. Can anyone confirm or tell me more about these things? Were they ice cream truck fare or sold by the box in supermarkets? (I assume the former, because I can't imagine anything that macabre next to a Flintstones Push-Pop.) I'm desperate to learn more.

3) Everyone: This morning, on the latest episode of the very aptly titled Good Morning America, they conducted this huge experiment to prove that people cannot eat six saltine crackers in under a minute without the aid of some type of drink. I take great issue with this, and I'm absolutely sure that I can eat six crackers in sixty seconds without the aid of liquids. Is it just me, or does this seem like a totally doable albeit mostly unpleasant thing to accomplish?

4) Everyone With A Wii: Owning a Wii (lol sounded dirty rofl) but being way, way outside gamer culture, I'm very curious to know which are considered the best characters to use in Brawl. I'm a Pikachu loyalist, but I'm starting to see the merits of Ikedom and maybe even Marthdom. I really want to see the merits of Pokemon Trainerdom, but they've yet to become clear. According to general consensus and not just errant opinions, which are considered the best and worst characters? I MUST KNOW. This is so important.

5) Would you rather get eaten by a shark, a squid, or a killer whale?

Posted by Matt on 07/29/2008. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 152 comments
1 2 3 … 7

Congrats on your Joker Matt! I’m sorry to say I don’t remember these popsicles but they sound pretty cool! And it seems to me like I could do the 6 crackers thing, I guess I’ll have to give it a shot. And I’d have to say eaten by a shark because hopefully that would be the fastest.

Chestnuts roasted by Dan @ 07/29/2008 10:59 PM

First, yayyyy!!! I’d rather get eaten by an OCTOSQUID! Yeah, I’m obsessed.

Chestnuts roasted by The Real Andrew @ 07/29/2008 10:59 PM

Aw damn, so I was actually second. Close though.

Chestnuts roasted by The Real Andrew @ 07/29/2008 11:00 PM

Six saltines in a minute? Doesn’t sound too hard.

As for Brawl, it varies widely. The best players I’ve seen usually use Diddy Kong and Samus. Others tend to rotate characters, choosing a new one each time. It depends on your playing style. Long story short, King Dedede stinks.

Chestnuts roasted by Hoverbored @ 07/29/2008 11:03 PM

I’m calling BS on the cracker thing.

Aaand, I’m no help with Brawl, never been a big fan. I have been getting my butt handed to me on Mario Kart lately though.

Ps – I saw Bob Dole this weekend whilst strolling the Mall in D.C. Weird.

Chestnuts roasted by Tommy Day @ 07/29/2008 11:03 PM

In regards to Brawl, pretty much anyone with a sword is considered master of cheapness, if you can master the sword. Master sword, lol.

And a squid, i would like to see a huge squid up close.

Chestnuts roasted by LooeyQ @ 07/29/2008 11:06 PM

Shark. Quick, easy, sure it would be painful, but the sheer alien terror of the squid grabbing me… Eep. I’m personally holding out for piranhas.

Chestnuts roasted by hcs @ 07/29/2008 11:06 PM

Hey Matt… can u say hi to me, lolz!

Chestnuts roasted by LooeyQ @ 07/29/2008 11:07 PM

1) Wildwood seems to have lost a lot of the luster it once had (I was there maybe 3 weeks ago) Not much except the regular shops on the boardwalk much like seaside.

2) the Blood pops I remember eating but can’t for the life of me remember if I got them from Ice cream trucks or the store.

And congrats on the Joker.

Chestnuts roasted by Caine @ 07/29/2008 11:09 PM

I thought the cracker thing would be easy, turns out not so, for me anyways. Damn near choked to death near the end.
No idea with brawl, bought it but haven’t played it more then 5 times, can’t get into it. I would think Link would be top shelf, ’cause he’s Link.
Killer Whale, because I don’t think that’s happened, and I could be like Pinocchio if it didn’t chew me.

Chestnuts roasted by Tterb @ 07/29/2008 11:09 PM

Best Brawlers:Donkey Kong, Lucario ,Pokemon Trainer Worst Brawlers:Pit, Gannondorf , King DEDEDE and you’ll never beat me when I play as Link

Chestnuts roasted by T.J. @ 07/29/2008 11:10 PM

Yay for the Joker! I have a feeling I’m going to have to try this cracker thing, it sounds easy. And I think I’d rather be eaten by a whale…I think you could live a couple of days inside of one and you might see some interesting things inside of it.

Chestnuts roasted by gingela5 @ 07/29/2008 11:13 PM

1) I’m East Coast, but I’ve Never been to Wildwood. I’d like to go, too.

3) My CVS co-workers have tried this before, and it can’t be done.

4) Brawl: My favorite is the long-range fighter. So, Falco can get pretty damn awesome/annoying depending on which end you fight him on. I also love Meta-Knight, but, as they said, his sword kicks ass. And he multi-jumps and glides.

5) If a Dugong ever got the chance, he’d eat you and everyone you care about.

6) When will the jukebox be up?

Chestnuts roasted by Invader Norbert @ 07/29/2008 11:13 PM

The blood pops always came from the grocery store for me in Atlanta. Usually in a black box with a visage of Dracula.

It’s all about Marth, Pit, Link, Mario, Captain Falcon, or Metaknight in Brawl for me. I rather like R.O.B and Mr. Game N Watch too, but they are pretty much just novelty.

Joker’s karate chop seems more like an angry slamming his fist down action.

Chestnuts roasted by Rob @ 07/29/2008 11:14 PM

Oh , and I can put six saltines in my mouth at once. Can you stack em, or is that against the rules?

Chestnuts roasted by T.J. @ 07/29/2008 11:14 PM

I never buy saltines, though I remember your feat of breaking one in two. I think I could do it though, and I may have to try.

I choose squid. I figure, I may have a chance to get away. Though I don’t know why.

Chestnuts roasted by kb @ 07/29/2008 11:14 PM

matt i dont know if this is any help but i have had something close to the vampire pops a while back. I found them at my local grocery store they had lime cherry grape and blue rasperry all in a pack sorta like flavor ices with a liquid center. It has only been like 3 or 4 years since so they may still be around.

Btw i finally got to see The Dark Knight and although Heath Ledgers Joker was amazing it isnt oscar worthy but Arron Eckhardts Harvey Dent is another story he was great and should win one. The only reason that Heath Ledger would get an oscar for The Joker is cause his untimely death rest his soul good but not oscar worthy.

Take care and i hope I helped with the vampires blood pops.

One last thing if you can is there anyway to do a megaparty blog on burples i cant find anything on the net about them and i remember loving them when i was little if you could that would make my summer megaparty.

Chestnuts roasted by joker9866 @ 07/29/2008 11:15 PM

Matt, go to http://www.mrboardwalk.net for all your Wildwood fun-fare. The guy that runs the site works in Dante’s Inferno. His site offers history, current events and message board.

Chestnuts roasted by CMac @ 07/29/2008 11:17 PM

I think I’d rather be eaten by a killer whale, getting eaten by a squid has that whole slow death factor.
Getting eaten by a shark is sort of redundant these days, no real appeal there,
But a killer whale, who gets eaten by killer whales?
Thats a classy way to go in my eyes.

Chestnuts roasted by JoshC @ 07/29/2008 11:18 PM

NJ shore towns such as Wildwood and Seaside Heights are awful now. I too used to be enamored and infatuated with these two places but even the nostalgia factor can’t overcome the seediness now (and not the “good” kind of seediness). I would go to LBI, Manasquan, or Atlantic City.

Chestnuts roasted by Clockwork @ 07/29/2008 11:19 PM

Wanna trade with me? I got the kicking Joker, I wanted the chopping one.

Chestnuts roasted by Elmo Machete @ 07/29/2008 11:26 PM

As for the saltine challenge, searching google, “six saltines in” minute, it seems it can be done by many people. Maybe it’s supposed to be 10 in 60 seconds as I’ve heard.

Chestnuts roasted by Anonymous @ 07/29/2008 11:27 PM

Cmac: I’ve been to that site, it’s great. There’s also a YouTube video somewhere of the Wildwood boardwalk in 1986, which is such a mindfuck because I don’t remember it being so…bare? Not that it was bare, but when I think of that place when I was a kid, I picture some magical happy land which apparently never existed.

Think I’ll still go back to WW despite the downgrades. I haven’t been there for a casual vacation in over 10 years — it’s always been with a group of friends and we were always constantly drunk and rowdy. I kinda just want to go there and have a simpler weekend. Little things like pulling back up to the hotels in the Crest at night and seeing them all quiet and lit up. No matter how shitty WW gets, that’ll still be around.

Not seeing many votes for Ike on Brawl, which surprises me. Maybe it’s just that he’s the key to killing Pikachu.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 07/29/2008 11:28 PM

This is the first year of my life I haven’t been to Wildwood. I live a 10-minute drive from fucking Disney World and here I am, disappointed about missing a year in Wildwood. I was there as recent as last July, and I can tell you this: It’s still good ol’ Wildwoodl. The smells are the same smells, the beach is still the same beach, the sounds are still the same sounds — well, most of them — and of course, the Fudgie Wudgie man is still the same Fudgie Wudgie man.

Chestnuts roasted by M.Fireball @ 07/29/2008 11:29 PM

I’d rather be eaten by a Killer Whale because, to the best of my knowledge, I would be the specie’s first human victim. I need my 15 minutes of fame damn-it!

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Poop @ 07/29/2008 11:31 PM

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