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My dying wish is for an owl/camel hybrid, which I call camowl.

X-E’s ’08 Summer Megaparty: Zzzzzz.


I haven't been sleeping well, lately. Not for any good (or bad) reason -- I've just found it preferable to do all the things I really need to do when nobody else on this side of the planet is awake. It was totally fine to live like that years ago, since anything in-between unemployment and self-employment doesn't really call for 9-5'ing. Now? Not so much.

I try to convince myself that three or four hours of sleep will suffice, and sometimes it does. But I guess there's a cumulative effect to this sort of thing, as I headed into work today needing to read eight scripts to clients with a certain level of zeal and eloquence, and it finally hit me that I was really fucking tired. Well past the point of having bloodshot, glassy eyes, I was literally stumbling on my walk from the bus stop to the office, very unable to navigate the sea of people doing whatever it is people do in Times Square.

When I got into the office, I noticed a peculiar side effect of sleep deprivation: It makes me talk like the filthiest, most exaggeratingly stereotypical truck driver ever. Was a series of audible "fucks" warranted by a faulty stapler? Probably not. I mean, sure, I had to staple a lot of papers together to prepare for this meeting, but I work in a fairly large building that had many other staplers available. In an industry that swells with pressure, it probably isn't a good idea to mark myself as the type of person who can lose their shit over a faulty stapler.

While somewhat slurry in general, I managed to keep it together for the twenty minutes that I needed to keep it together, and quietly ducked out afterwards. I've mentioned the long, long commute I have many times before, but today I was actually looking forward to it. There isn't much else to do on a long bus ride besides sleep. I settled in, cranked up the iPod, and as soon as the real world started blending with the dream world, a gigantic man sat almost literally on top of me, and spent the next 90 minutes guffawing into his phone with such incredible vigor that I'm still wondering if one of my enemies hired him to keep me from sleeping.

Yeah, this is pretty much my way of telling you that I'm too tired to write anything of substance tonight. As penance, I offer the embarrassing confession that I eat lemons much in the same way other people eat apples.

We now transform this into a random chat thread, only I guess it won't be so random since I'm going to give you a theme for discussion: Things that scared the shit out of you as a child, or maybe even now.

Posted by Matt on 07/24/2008. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 189 comments

Here are all the details for the “Real Ghostbusters” DVD set. Hope you have alot of $$$ lying about.

http://dvd.ign.com/articles/893/893684p1.html

That Roger Rabbit shoe scene upset me too mostly because nobody tries to step him to stop him.

I’ve always found The Spitting Image Puppets kinda creepy. If you don’t know them they’re in the famous Genesis music video “Land of Confusion.”

The Ghoulies 2 movie poster with the green ghoulie popping out of the toilet freaked me out. In fact, alot of those horror movie posters are kinda freaky/memorable. You could do an entire article/blog entry on them. Good thing Halloween is coming in 3 months.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 07/25/2008 3:46 PM


JLAJRC: Here ya go!

http://www.toplessrobot.com/2008/03/the_10_most_pantswettingly_scary_movie_posters_of.php

Chestnuts roasted by Commander Awesome @ 07/25/2008 3:49 PM


LARGE MARGE. Then and now, still can’t watch that scene.
The movie ‘Vamp’ also scared the crap out of me when I was a kid, I had to turn it off after 20 minutes or so. Fastforward 20+ years, my boyfriend and I rented it, I told him it was the scariest movie EVER! How embarrassing to watch it with him only to realize its pretty much a comedy about vampires with some very large and gross fangs.

Chestnuts roasted by fulgora77 @ 07/25/2008 3:50 PM


Crap! I forgot! The demon latex things in the movie, House. And the fat one that got it’s head cut off by sheers. Crap! Kept me awake for a whole year.

Chestnuts roasted by Bill @ 07/25/2008 3:56 PM


The aliens at the end of Close Encounters scare the hell out of me, with their giant eyes and creepy hands all touching the humans. I don’t care how friendly they’re supposed to be, they kept kidnapping people and keeping them in their creepy spaceship for decades. I can watch almost the entire movie, but as soon as the spaceship door opens, and you see their creepy pale skin and little legs wandering about, I have to turn away.

Chestnuts roasted by Michael @ 07/25/2008 4:04 PM


I am the owner of the area.

Thanks,

Stinkbutt

Chestnuts roasted by stinkbutt @ 07/25/2008 4:33 PM


Things that scared me as a child (and pretty much still freak me out as an adult):

-Clowns
-Men with beards (especially Santa Claus)
-Crowds
-Being stuck in my room when it was on fire (I tried to convince my father for YEARS to get me one of those collapsible ladders for my bedroom window, but no go)
-Unsolved Mysteries, especially the ghost ones (one was about a poltergeist making a clock radio start and stop randomly, and it was the same make and model clock radio I had at the time, so I was sure my radio was possessed)
-Bugs or anything that flies getting in my hair or face or (GAH) down my shirt
-People or things that pop out unexpectedly from behind something else (carnival haunted houses still freak me out, even when they’re geared toward little kids and the little kids aren’t even afraid, I’m the adult screaming and hiding my eyes like a big loser)
- I read The Exorcist and It MUCH too young and they scared me for years – I still don’t like The Exorcist much, because the Devil? Super-scary.
-Dolls or toys with creepy eyes that seem to follow you in the dark, as well as ventriloquist dummies
-Creepy little kids, a la the twins in The Shining

Chestnuts roasted by Silvertongue @ 07/25/2008 4:40 PM


Commander: I remember all of the posters on that list except for the Pumpkinhead one. I would’ve used any of the “Nightmare on Elm Street” posters instead. Especially the first one with
Nancy in bed with Freddy’s glove on top of her head.

The weird thing is, with the exception of the Blob remake, I have not seen any of the movies on that list. But I remember the posters VERY well.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 07/25/2008 4:52 PM


Power tools-
When I was about 5, I was watchign Maximum Overdrive. My parents thought it’d be okay to watch since it was on TV and didn’t have cuss words. At the time I was watching I was grating radishes for my mum. At the scene where the lady gets cut by the electric knife- I sliced my finger on the grater and freaked out.

And Maggots. They just make me scream like a pansy little foo-foo girl.

Chestnuts roasted by kittymao @ 07/25/2008 5:21 PM


The Opening sequence in Scream 2. I saw it in the movie theaters with my mom and my aunt. My mom thought I could handle it since I watched Scream on VHS all the time and loved it. I was 8 and really was anticipating the movie. Luckily the beginning of the movie takes place in a full movie theater, and the girl gets murdered in front of hundreds of people without them realizing it. That was enough for me. I think I hyperventilated before we left the theater shortly after.

Chestnuts roasted by Brett @ 07/25/2008 5:24 PM


I used to be scared to death of my papaw’s Bull. He had a lot of cattle and I was cool with all of them except that bull. I had nightmares for years of that thing, in my dreams it would transform back and forth into the Devil and chase me. I’d fall down and not be able to get back up. I hated that thing. Still do. ugh…

Chestnuts roasted by Hippie Joe @ 07/25/2008 5:30 PM


I got locked into my grandparents bathroom on accident when i was about 5 and the lock stuck i cut my thumb pretty bad with a straight razor and have been afarid of them ever since

Chestnuts roasted by Matthew @ 07/25/2008 5:55 PM


I got locked into my grandparents bathroom on accident when i was about 5 and the lock stuck i cut my thumb pretty bad with a straight razor and have been afarid of them ever since

Chestnuts roasted by Matthew @ 07/25/2008 5:55 PM


There where only a few things that ever freaked me out as a child.
- Pet Cemetary the movie, I watched this at my friends house, and remember riding my bike home as fast as I could when it was over.
- Ronald McDonald Doll, I hated this thing. It had a big heavy plastic head and it would blow a whistle when you squeezed its chest.
- Michael Landon, I could never watch little house on the prairie or Highway to Heaven, without getting terrible nightmares of Michael Landon.

Chestnuts roasted by Jamie G @ 07/25/2008 6:10 PM


You know what I was totally terrified of as a little kid, was that bust of Mozart that sat on Rowlfe the Dog’s piano on The Muppet Show. It creeped me out because sometimes it wasn’t just a bust, it was an animated pupet that spoke, and I think it disturbed me that it was just a talking head. Funny how we can pick out something that scares us as kids. I guess that’s why even G rated Disney movies will have the “Some parts may frighten young children.” I know a guy who was scared of the walking armoire thing in Beauty and the Beast. The one that carries Belle’s father away. My other friend was terrified of Beaker from The Muppet Show.

Chestnuts roasted by CMJ @ 07/25/2008 6:41 PM


I like how the text ads at the side of this site change depending on what the topic of discussion is. I see now it’s advertising staplers….

Chestnuts roasted by CMJ @ 07/25/2008 6:46 PM


I love Doctro Who, and I never thought about the opening sequence being scary, but you guys who mentioned it have a point. The Tom Baker ones had that big photo of his head with that bulgy eyed stare that’d just loom up over the time tunnel effect.

Chestnuts roasted by CMJ @ 07/25/2008 7:09 PM


When I was a kid I HATED clowns. The three movies that contributed to that fear were Killer Klowns from Outer Space,IT and Batman(first Tim Burton one). The worst one out of those three though was Killer Klowns from Outer Space. The VOICES of those clowns were just so FREAKY! I also got a little creeped out by the themes of The X-Files and Unsolved Mysteries.

Chestnuts roasted by ULTRAMAN @ 07/25/2008 7:24 PM


The threshold to my bedroom was some odd Polish pine or something. And it had the most perfect knot-hole in it that was about 3 feet off the floor. Right at eye level for a 3 year old. On top of that, it looked like the eye on top of the pyramid on the dollar bill. I guess I was at the age where I started to observe things like the drawings on a dollar. And everytime I had to go to the bedroom, I had to close my eyes cuz I was scared begeezus by that knot hole.

Another fear was a ceramic Mary and Jesus statue a neighbor brought by for my mom (we’re Catholic like Matt). And the neighbor somehow stated that the statues was “made by her brother” and for some reason I processed that in my 4 year old head that the statue was somehow “made of her brother”. So I thought he was inside it. I could not go near tha frickin’ statue for years! I was so scared of it!

Chestnuts roasted by Alex @ 07/25/2008 7:49 PM


When I was younger, I was terrified of the Incredible Hulk. I would have long nightmares about him and could never stand to watch the TV show, haven’t watched any of the movies either.

Chestnuts roasted by kb @ 07/25/2008 7:53 PM


This is strange but when I was little I was afraid of Viggo from Ghostbusters 2, especially the part where he starts thrashing his head around while he’s holding Oscar, and also the train scene with the heads on spikes, “Winston!”. I too have a horrible fear of looking out of a window at night.
Also if someone could help me figure out what book used to be freaked out by as a kid. It involves a bunny as the main character with patches all over him, he breaks out of his maker’s workshop and is attacked by dogs, then there’s some part with a Dracula doll and an evil flapper doll that smokes, and mechanical wasps that fly. I’m pretty sure this is real and not a dream, if it is then it is pretty much the most bizarre children’s book ever, if not then I guess it’s time for an evaluation. Thanks

Chestnuts roasted by Mary Beth @ 07/25/2008 8:08 PM


Any movie that’s more than slightly scary. This includes some purported horror-comedies – I know three-fourths of you love the “Gremlins” films, but they scared the living daylights out of me as a 5-year-old and I still can’t watch the first one all the way through.

Chestnuts roasted by starwenn @ 07/25/2008 8:16 PM


Storm grates seriously freak me out. To this day I’m terrified that they will collapse while I’m walking over. When I was a kid I used to have a nightmare that the storm grate in the ShopRite parking lot would give way when I was walking on it and I would be dangling over my (get this) my grandmother creepy, cobweb-filled basement which still had a dimly lit section partitioned off and filled with coal.

The Are You Afraid of the Dark episode where the kid gets trapped in the pinball machine that was like a giant closed down mall. I still get antsy when the mall is getting ready to close and high tail it out of there ASAP.

My college was featured on Unsolved Mysteries which freaked us out when we first heard of that.

And I farkin’ LOVE eating lemons. It freaks out my friend so I make sure I do it in front of her.

Chestnuts roasted by Ann @ 07/25/2008 8:23 PM


my irrational fears

-looking at feet or being touched by feet

- spiders (im still convinced they crawl in and out of my ears while im sleeping at night)

- talking dolls of any sort (thanks to Talking Tina from the twilight zone)

- the movie Troll (especially the Troll king)

- clowns

Chestnuts roasted by skewbydew @ 07/25/2008 8:52 PM


MARY BETH: Was the book “Bunnicula”? I never read it, taking an educated guess here. Click my name for the Wiki link.

Chestnuts roasted by Beckner @ 07/25/2008 9:18 PM


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