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My dying wish is for an owl/camel hybrid, which I call camowl.

X-E’s ’08 Summer Megaparty: BULLSHOT.

As frequent readers know, I'm a gigantic fan of Bloody Marys and Dirty Martinis...and virtually any cocktail that drinks like a meal and sort of doubles as a soup. Searching for new horizons, I stumbled upon a new recipe -- one that seems completely gross, but is actually so unbelievably good that I'm going against my vow to never write blog entries while half-crocked. Meet the BULLSHOT.


Christ, you're going to think this is so disgusting, but I swear, it's not. Basically, a Bullshot is a spin on the Bloody Mary, replacing the usual tomato juice with beef broth. Uh huh. It's conceptually unpalatable for sure, but once you taste this shit, you'll realize that it's the cocktail only a cow could hate.

While on par with the insane sodium level of a Bloody Mary, the Bullshot somehow feels lighter (likely because it's less "pulpy" than its crimson cousin), and is actually far easier to drink. The vodka in a Bloody Mary always seemed halfway to pointless, but with the Bullshot, I'm barely finished with the glass and I'm already feeling those warm, beefy fuzzies.

If you're having trouble reconciling the idea of beef broth and vodka, note that there's a lot of spicy add-ons to help it feel like more than that. Lemon juice, Worcestershire sauce, cayenne pepper, celery salt and a fuckton of Tabasco. The end result is brown and beautiful.

It's the kind of thing I don't think I could ever bring myself to order if I was at a bar. Chances are, they wouldn't have a clue what I was talking about, and even if they did, I'd spend the rest of the night being known as the guy who ordered the beef soup cocktail. On the other hand, while it's hard to disguise a Bloody Mary, the Bullshot looks almost identical to a Long Island Iced Tea. Covert disgustingness FTW.


The primary ingredients are shown above. I'd give you a recipe, but honestly, it's just like the Bloody Mary in that you can mix it in any number of ways and still come out golden. If you need some starter ideas, try this recipe.

Considered more of a morning drink and hangover cure, I look forward to breaking the rules and making the Bullshot an occasional midnight snack whenever the mood and/or opportunity presents itself. Sure, the cocktail makes you feel like a salt-filled shitbag, but so what? BEEF VODKA. It just has no right to be this good, but it is.

Posted by Matt on 07/15/2008. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 125 comments

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Thank you, Matt!! Curtola. Bobby Curtola~

Chestnuts roasted by Neg @ 07/16/2008 8:47 PM


GOOB-
I wouldn’t worry about what to do once you’ve beaten Mario Galaxy. It’s going to take you quite awhile to get all 120 stars,believe me. I still haven’t done it,and I got the game when it came out. Plus,when you do get all 120,you can play again as Luigi,who plays a little differently.
I usually agree with you about those type of 1-player games being a waste,but this one has so much to do,it’s worth the money.

Chestnuts roasted by Anonymous @ 07/16/2008 9:09 PM


Yeah there’s DEFINATELY more than enought to do in Super Mario Galaxy after youv’e beaten it once. There’s LOTS of little secrets hidden here and there allover the place.

Chestnuts roasted by ULTRAMAN @ 07/16/2008 9:32 PM


I don’t know if I’m extremely excited or extremely apprehensive about Animal Crossing. It really was the equivalent of crack in 8th grade, I think I pulled 4 all nighters that week. Blockbuster really screwed my grades over with that free rental for Animal Crossing coupon.

I really don’t get the reason behind the new motion sensing peripheral. BUT if it can make catching fish in Zelda easier, I’m all for it.

Chestnuts roasted by Brett @ 07/16/2008 10:32 PM


you know that Aloe water you can get at most Asian supermarkets? The one that has chunks of Aloe in it? Well, regardless DON’T try and mix it with vodka. Even though you think it SHOULD work… it don’t. Trust me… Or, go ahead and try it yourself and let me know what you think of it.

Chestnuts roasted by Nizzler @ 07/16/2008 10:44 PM


hey guys. i’m watching a charlie brown christmas right now.

sigh, i wish it was christmas sooooo bad.. halloween too…

Chestnuts roasted by Andrew @ 07/16/2008 10:51 PM


Actually I went out today and saw Halloween stuff being put out at Dollar General

Chestnuts roasted by Anonymous @ 07/16/2008 10:58 PM


Anonymous Hell yeah! I’m so hypocritical when it comes to Halloween. I get all in a tizzy when it’s October and the Christmas stuff comes out, but as far as I’m concerned, the Halloween stuff can’t come out early enough. I’m ready for it NOW. I’ve been keeping my eyes peeled but haven’t seen anything around here. Looks like I’ll have to hit up the Dollar General this weekend.

Chestnuts roasted by DJ D @ 07/16/2008 11:03 PM


It was Dollar Tree I just looked at the bag again also Hobby Lobby was putting both Christmas and Halloween stuff, I was amazing, I’ve never seen Halloween in July.

Chestnuts roasted by Grotesk @ 07/16/2008 11:05 PM


If anyone cares,I was the anonymous who told Goob that Mario Galaxy has a lot of content.
I was not the anonymous who saw Halloween stuff at Dollar General.

Chestnuts roasted by Kid Nicky @ 07/16/2008 11:08 PM


I wish it was Halloween ALL THE TIME!

Chestnuts roasted by ULTRAMAN @ 07/16/2008 11:10 PM


I think I got in the habit of expecting it around July because I used to work in a haunted house. We had to start planning and building our rooms in July to have it done by Halloween, so this is the start of the Halloween season for me, if there was such a thing. As far as I’m concerned, every day is Halloween at my place.

Chestnuts roasted by DJ D @ 07/16/2008 11:21 PM


DJD Then you have an awesome place!

Chestnuts roasted by ULTRAMAN @ 07/16/2008 11:26 PM


So that explains why DJD runs around in a Batman costume everyday…..

Chestnuts roasted by jjwspider @ 07/16/2008 11:36 PM


now if only a drink could be made out of general tso’s chicken

Chestnuts roasted by bob @ 07/16/2008 11:38 PM


Slightly delayed comment (for some reason the site wasn’t letting me post) but for those of you who love the Robot Heroes/Adventure Heroes/Galactic Heroes/Super Hero Squad lines, prepare for the next wave of heroes – Combat Heroes! This line will feature stylized GI Joe characters. Click the link for an awesome Snake-Eyes, Timberwolf and Zartan.

Chestnuts roasted by jjwspider @ 07/16/2008 11:49 PM


Not sure what’s going on but I can only post a few sentences at a time. For those with love of the Robot/Galactic/Adventure Heroes/Super Hero Squad lines – Hasbro is releasing a Combat Heroes line of stylized GI Joe characters. It looks awesome!

Chestnuts roasted by jjwspider @ 07/16/2008 11:53 PM


For some reason the link won’t post, but here’s Snake-Eyes, Timberwolf and Zartan: http://i.toynewsi.com/g/index.php?mode=view&album=GIJoe%2F08_Joe_Con_Recap&pic=01_Combat_Heroes_01.jpg&dispsize=600&start=0

The next image is Bazooka and Firefly.

Chestnuts roasted by jjwspider @ 07/16/2008 11:54 PM


http://www.lileks.com/institute/gallery/drpepper/index.html

Chestnuts roasted by Lapin @ 07/17/2008 1:14 AM


jjwspider: the Bazooka one is really cool.. – those look great.. – wouldn’t mind getting the Zartan, too.. – hopefully they do Road Block down the road..

Chestnuts roasted by Review the World @ 07/17/2008 1:42 AM


Matt, I’m worried about you.

I think that year after year of doing this website, eating stale and possibly parasite ridden years old foodstuffs for our amusement has given your pallet the flavor profile of a garbage truck. That’s the only way I can explain how you would willingly drink a concoction of meat liquid and alcohol. You’d might as well just dump a mini bottle or two into your Chunky soup for lunch.

If anything, however, you now have a drink order in your repertoire which would probably lend you a great deal of respect if you ever step foot in a Shriner’s club. ;-)

Chestnuts roasted by Scelestus Unus @ 07/19/2008 9:10 AM


I used to eat those little beef cubes so this should be really good.

Chestnuts roasted by Wysefool @ 07/20/2008 7:38 AM


In addition to Clamato, there’s also Beefamato.

Chestnuts roasted by Ubu Rex @ 07/21/2008 1:48 PM


I always wondered what the hell Rodney Dangerfield was asking for in “Caddyshack”

Chestnuts roasted by Drew @ 05/28/2009 11:12 PM


Hot damn! I have no words for this. I’ll never taste it b/c I’m a one of those weird people (aka vegetarian), but I can’t believe this exists.

What makes it frothy on top? Or maybe I shouldn’t ask… :)

Chestnuts roasted by Super Genie @ 11/20/2010 5:27 PM


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