I linked to an old entry about The Revenger in a recent post, and today, the guy who actually invented the thing e-mailed me. It was one of those odd moments where you really believe that there's some kind of circular pattern built into the universe. Plus, now I have an extra resume bullet point to put under "quoted on the Ghoulies IV DVD box." It's getting to the point where I can write my own ticket.

I don't remember buying this, but I found a Kenner trade catalog from 1987 in one of my many piles of books, filled with excellent, professional toy photos that I may swipe and scan should I ever decide to do a full article on any of the featured lines. As the cover states, the catalog was given to buyers and press at that year's Toy Fair convention, meaning that everything covered inside was both brand spankin' new and of utmost importance to Kenner. (For those unaware, Kenner was among the largest toy distributors in the world until they were bought out by Hasbro in the early '90s.)

Expectedly, the catalog is a fun nostalgia trip, but what I really love is how they provided "Plan-O-Grams" for each of the featured toy lines -- suggested setups for toy stores to display their goods. Below are a few of my favorites...

Most of the Plan-O-Grams were wishful thinking on Kenner's part, as even the largest chains probably weren't ready to roll the dice by providing eight feet of shelf space to Furrever Friends or Fluppy Dogs. On the other hand, this Real Ghostbusters "Ghost Center" seems realistic enough. The series was still in its infancy at the time, meaning that all Slimer-related doodads still bore the rare "Green Ghost" title.

Definitely the most successful of the many lines featured in the catalog, I had most of the stuff on that rack. Note the neat section dedicated to cans of Ecto-Plazm in the lower right. I still firmly believe that Ecto-Plazm was the best toy slime in history, and the breadth of competition is far wider than you might think.

I'm saddened to learn that there were Stay Puft and Slimer plush dolls available. I certainly never had (or saw) those as a kid. While it's nice to picture yesteryear's toy stores as being full of line-specific "Plan-O-Grams" such as this, the truth is, they weren't. Those dolls probably got thrown into the random plushie aisle, forced to make themselves seem attractive to a clientele of little girls who had little interest in ghastly spooks.

Gotta hand it to Play-Doh...the stuff has staying power. Many toy stores still keep setups just like this one, right down to the yellow "Fun Center" signage. In fact, while the specific properties Mr. Play-Doh chooses to team up with have obviously changed since then, the generalities of the toys shown here are really no different from what you'd see in stores today.

Look close at the middle shelf and note the three-pound (!!!) tubs of single-color Play-Doh. Definitely haven't seen those in a while. While my brain thinks that trying to sell that much Play-Doh in a single color was a fool's idea, my heart beams at the thought of a three-pound bucket full of even the shittiest color. (Which is PURPLE, in case you were unaware.)

The property-specific Play-Doh playsets included Silverhawks, Mask, and to continue tonight's theme, The Real Ghostbusters. The RGB set was particularly nice, including both a small-scale Ecto-1 vehicle and a canister of all-new glow-in-the-dark Play-Doh. I wonder if the glow-in-the-dark Play-Doh was still nontoxic? Having spent much of my life as a proud eater of Play-Doh, I would've been most pleased to have a meal that glowed in the dark. In fact, for however taboo, I'm surprised Kenner didn't just throw caution to the wind and promote it like that. You're telling me you wouldn't have been the least bit interested in eating something that glowed? I can't believe the Weekly Reader didn't cover this.

Not sure if any of you remember Sky Commanders, a line that helped establish an odd trend of action figures sized somewhere between M.U.S.C.L.E. and G.I. Joe toys. I guess you could compare their scale to MASK, another collection featured in this catalog. I'm overusing the italics tags and I sincerely apologize.

Whereas MASK relied on disguised, weapon-loaded vehicles for a gimmick, Sky Commanders relied on...green string. It wasn't as bad as it sounds. Most Sky Commanders sets consisted of a pinky-length action figure and a vehicle which could be mounted to slide across, up or down a green string. It worked really well, and I'll never forget the awesome sense of accomplishment whenever I sent General Summit flying across the room, four feet above the floor.

I guess I can't claim that random 1987 toy store Plan-O-Grams make for the most exciting subject I've ever covered, so to provide this entry with added oomph, I will end on a new Bug Joke.

Q: What did the wasp say to the panhandling beetle?
A: Quit "bugging" me.

...and also with a picture of a bug.

...and then one of a boat.

...and then one featuring Thanos's possibly-maybe granddaughter, Nebula.

PS: Spellcheck has cleared "oomph" as an actual word. Yes!

Posted by Matt on 07/10/2008. E-mail me!