The X-Entertainment Blog!

06/28/2008: The Hate Boat.

We went on a cruise about a week ago, and now that I’ve had sufficient time to reflect, I can say with all confidence that I will never, ever do that again. Even if the cruise was free and Charo was performing in the lounge, NO, no no no, no more God damned cruises.

We sailed on the Carnival Victory, and if the Victory is indicative (systematic?) of the other ships in that particular fleet, I feel compelled to broadcast the sad fact that Carnival totally blows. What a horrible, awful cruise. What a miserable, ridiculous waste of money, vacation days and dapper first-worn pants.

I don’t even know where to start. Everything that we loved about last cruise (on an NCL ship, keep in mind) was clearly absent on this one. The Victory’s general decor bridged the gap between a low-level Vegas casino and a 1987 shopping mall’s food court, and though I had no issues about that, my list of grievances is so long that, if I were to list them all here, I’d need to drop the font size by two points just to keep things manageable.

Lowlights:

1) You know the “muster drill” you must endure before sailing, where they gather everyone on the decks and teach them how to use lifejackets and such? It’s an annoying but mandatory exercise, but I have to believe that the muster drill on this cruise was less than typical. If there are any cruise addicts out there, tell me: Do muster drills usually begin with a 45 minute waiting period, where you’re forced to stand cramped with a thousand other people wearing neck-crunching lifejackets? I’m not talking about the actual drill, mind you. They made us stand like that for 45 minutes to wait for the 5% of lazy assholes who refused to come out of their rooms. I think the actual drill lasted 20 seconds. Oh, and did I mention that the boat started sailing away during the drill? So much for the joyous and romantic bottle-breaking moment when you hear the horn and feel the tiles shake for the first time. I was too busy getting a rash on my face from lifejacket velcro.

2) “Buckets of beer” are a big thing on any cruise ship. You’re sitting out on the deck, and you order buckets full of ice and beer bottles for too much money. It’s fun. On our last cruise, we had our pick from virtually any beer we could think of. On this cruise, our choices were limited to Bud, Bud Light and Miller Light in plastic bottles. They refused to serve anything in glass bottles. Anything. We asked why, and they said it was illegal to do so. Well, it may be company policy, but I don’t think it’s “illegal.” Sound like a small gripe? Sure, but you try to get your load on with nothing but Miller Light out of a plastic fucking bottle for four days straight. Along the same lines, most cocktails arrived in cheap plastic tumblers.

3) The food. WAS HORRIBLE. I accepted the fact that Carnival still adhered to the archaic and ridiculous “eat in the same place at the same time for dinner each night” rule, even though it sucks. But what about the rest of the day? Well, for the most part, you were forced to eat from the worst buffet the world has ever known, which was half-inside, half-outside, reeking, filthy, sticky, with all the edibles thrice-cooked under the power of God’s sun and Satan’s 40 trillion heat lamps. I am a person who will pick a peanut out of a muddy puddle and eat it without nary a dare, and still, the food at this buffet was so unbelievably disgusting that I pretty much resigned myself to chicken tenders for breakfast and lunch for each of the four days. Serious haute cuisine.

4) The ship’s layout was so insane and convoluted that there were literally instances of us needing to go up and down several floors just to get to a different point of the same floor we started on. I’m not fucking Algernon; I had nothing to prove by solving Carnival’s Lament Configuration.

5) The ship’s only port-of-call was in Saint John. Not the tropical island — Saint John in Canada. Sailing northward meant that we were sailing into cooler climates riddled by fog, which was kind of neat but sort of ruined the ambiance of the lip-synching three-man calypso band which played on the pool deck incessantly. As for Saint John, it’s a nice enough city, but I’m a little perplexed as to how it became a port-of-call for a large and trusted cruise line. When we got there, we had two options. We could’ve spent an additional hundred bucks each to get driven out to some wooden picnic tables to eat quickly cooked lobsters, or, alternatively, we could browse a local shopping plaza for an hour before heading back to the ship. We went with the latter. Highlight was, uh, getting coffee.

6) I lost a small fortune at the casino. I guess I can’t blame Carnival for that, but it didn’t improve matters any.

Now, it’s hard to fuck up a cruise, even a horrible cruise. We still had fun and plenty of it. But when the highlight of an expensive vacation is signing a drink receipt to Lieutenant Eckhardt and getting away with it, chances are good that you picked the wrong vacation to go on. No monkey-themed towel animal was going to change that.

Granted, it could be that the stars just weren’t aligned for this particular cruise, but I doubt it. Based on our (albeit limited) experiences on other cruise lines and from the hundreds of reviews I’ve read, Carnival really needs to figure out how to modernize. As other lines gravitate upward with ships that are true entertainment complexes with every conceivable whim catered to, this vacation felt like something you’d win from a shady church raffle. Blah.

In happier news, we’re just days away from X-Entertainment’s Summer Megaparty, starting July 1st. If you weren’t around for previous Megaparties, all this really means is that I’ll post everyday in July, if not longer. Revised Summer Jukebox will be active, and yes, for those concerned, sunshine-themed stickers will be added to our faithful Trapper Keeper logo.

In fact, I better go start taking care of that, so enjoy your SNT!

Wait, Saint John?!
I’ve been to Saint John, it’s nice, but I don’t really see it as a port of call.

I’m sorry u had a crappy cruise. BUT I’M HAPPY YOU’RE BACK.
I’m baking a monkey bread who wants in?

Happy SNT everybody! Glad to have you back, Matt.
I was laughing my ass off about the booze and the world’s worst buffet, but then I got all bummed thinking about Algernon. So really, a good mixture of fun and pathos, much like it seems the cruise itself was.
Looking forward to the Megaparty

Whoooo!!!! Freaks and Geeks you tube marathon! I have been watching almost 8 hours now. If anyone wants to watch from episode one to the end at episode 17..let me know…I can give you the link to the lovely youtuber who posted em.

I had a yummy dinner of brown rice, steamed broccoli, baby carots, asparagus and string beans with a ginger sauce and steak. yum! Last night same thing, but with shrimp too!

Husband just got a 40 hour week gig at Papa Johns down the street(hopefully this new location lasts longer than the two that already went under…they stayed 18 months each)so we have an excuse to sample the wares tonight. We are gonna get a whole wheat pizza.

I’m swearing off all the white products….pasta rice and bread, and going whole wheat pasta and bread, and brown rice.

PS: I’m dying to play Smash. Any jokers out there willing to get their asses handed to them on a Pika platta?

Sadly I don’t have wifi. but reading “pike platta” warms the cuckolds of my heart.
What is a cuckold anyway?

Oh yeahhhhh. The best part about Summer Megaparty, other than the obvious? Once it’s finished then the Halloween articles start rolling in.

Sorry for the double post, but what did everyone think about Wall-E? I loved it, social commentary and all. We also lucked out with our theater (Alamo Drafthouse), since they had a special Wall-E menu, including a cupcake in a cup in BNL collectible cup. All the kids got a free rubber Wall-E watch, too. Since my cousin didn’t want hers, it was passed along to me.

Matt, I haven’t even finished reading the post, but you just redeemed your two weeks of non-posting-ness with that Algernon reference.

Yay! It’s my first wedding anniversary tomorrow, but we have been celebrating all weekend. We went to the comic book shop today and blew all kinds of money on comic books and toys and now are relaxing with video games and chocolate chip muffins. And to top it all off, what do I find when I hop onto the internet?…a new X-E post! What a great day! Tomorrow we are going to go see Wall-E too!

Eddie Lightning Frog
I thought WALLâ€¢E was AMAZING. My favorite movie of the year. Maybe of the decade. It was fantastic. Easily the best Pixar film. Hell, one of the best SciFi films I’ve ever seen, too.

Great post! I didn’t expect us to get another one before the Megaparty. Nice surprise! Sorry the trip was so bad though. Man, that does sound pretty lame. I’ve never been on a cruise, but I hope my first experience is a lot better than that one. You, as always, get extra points for making a Lieutenant Eckhardt reference.

Eddie Lightening Frog, I haven’t seen it yet but I’m really looking forward to it. I might check it out this coming week sometime. I don’t know anyone around me that wants to actually go so I’ll probably just go by myself. Hey, won’t be the first time.

“You mean when you’re running the show? You ain’t got no future, JACK! You’re a grade-a nutboy and Grissom knows it!”

Also, sorry your cruise was so suck Matt. I myself refuse to get on a boat until I sprout gills (I don’t do planes either), so I have nothing to compare it to. But it sounds like a downer of a vacation. There’s nothing worse than pumping yourself up for a cool vacation only to have horrible circumstances impede on your fun.

What a hectic day of running errands, but I got most everything done! My biggest thing was making sure I got my dog to the groomer and now she’s all clean and pretty. I wanted to get my car washed but didn’t have time. Oh, well.

Happy SNT to all. I won’t be here. I’m leaving in about 20 minutes to see a friends new place. I’ll check back tomorrow on the chaos that ensued.

earthworm goddesssounds like an awesome anniversary! Kinda in the same fashion me and the hubby celebrated our 3rd anniversary in April. we went to Borders and got some cool books, and bought guitar hero 3 and had ice cream and played all night!

Sorry to hear your vaca was no fun; I’m taking my first real pricey trip in years in July, so I’m scared it’s gonna be a waste of money….

earthwormgoddess: congrats on the anniversary! - blowing money at the comic book shop sounds rad, and something i haven’t done in quite awhile but truly miss..

welcome back matt! - that cruise sounds so bad i’m surprised you didn’t consider “falling” overboard like that woman i saw on bad news programs a few months back..

Matt, I’m off on errands for a bit but I’ll look for you later for Smashery.

The wife and I have plans to go on our first cruise next year, to Alaska. At least the cruise and airfare are going to be free. My mother-in-law is treating us. And it’s Norwegian, which I’ve heard is a decent cruise-line.

Dang! I was just browsing on here like an hour ago and got nothing. And suddenly my RSS updates with X-E-goodness! Woo! Sorry about the cruise, Matt. Can’t win ‘em all?

Anyone started collecting the new Transformers lines yet? I’m 8 figured deep in the wonderfully-molded Animated line and sightings of the new Classics/Universe line are popping up left and right so I’m on the prowl….(yes, Prowl is included in the line. ha…ha…ha….)

Can’t wait for Summer Megaparty! I’ll be Megapartying on Warped Tour for all of July so I’ll be checking in when I can!

Matt, I’ll Brawl… I need your friend code, though. Hey, I’m going on a cruise late July! Any words of advice???

Is summer megaparty real? I am so sad that I will miss it. If only I could totally control time and space or be in two places at once. As it stands now, my powers of time control are only partial.

Rev. Back It Up, Summer Megaparty is posts for 31 days straight! No traveling required!

Oh, anyone is welcome to Brawl me! Oh, and my Wii number, for anyones use, like Brawls, is 0536-4005-2604-3964

So Rev since your going on vacation during the Megaparty can I be the Big Boss in this area in your absence?

Im sorry that you didnt like your cruise Matt. It sounds though like your experience was the exception rather than the rule for most cruises. Ive been on lone and it was one of the best experiences of my life.

If you want a good cruise line, go to Cunard. They are a subsidiary of Carnival, but are much better than them. They have the biggest, most luxurious, and best managed ships in the world.

Sounds pretty crappy and, although I have never been on a cruise, I think I get the picture of how miserable it must have been.
Good to have you back, Capt.

Oh thank goodness, SNT. Ahhh…that rather long exercise before is over. Now I’m taking a break from moving as I watch about the Shuttle mission development. I, sadly, will be away most if not all of the Megaparty (besides the first week).

GUYS!!! JEEPERSMEDIA IS BACK! He is one of the most popular guys on youtube, and has been gone for a year. HES BACK! MATT AND JEEPERSMEDIA, YEAH!

Cuckolding is when there is a married couple or just a couple in general and the woman is dominant and the man is submissive and she goes out and sleeps with another man in front of him or not and then goes and tells him how great the other man was in bed and humiliates him. The extreme scenario is when she sleeps with a black man (with her and her husband being white) and gets preggo with a black baby and then everyone knows she was sleeping around. That is a fantasy for some men to have a woman that is committed enough to the fantasy for him to financially provide for her and her baby that isn’t his. There are some fucked up people in this world Josh. I hope I educated you a bit. I could of just told you to google the word but you know these little uncomfortable moments are more fun then just telling you to google the word. Anyone have any other questions like that feel free to ask me I know everything like that I am to curious about the strange and unusual for my own good.

Sorry Matt about your shitty Cruise. I am looking forward to the July Megaparty. July is going to be a really good month internet wise. June has been another theme month on another blog I regularly visit. So back to back is pretty cool. Like I have mentioned briefly one of my life goals is at least once to go on the R Family Cruise which is a gay friendly cruise that Rosie and her wife put on at least 2 times a year. That one looks like it is fantastic if you are into that sort of thing. Cindi Lauper performs, among other live concerts and it varies from cruise to cruise. I don’t talk about that this much on X-E because you just aint interested but that would be the cruise to go on for me. I would go on that one or none because if I went on another one then I would just pout because I am a spoiled brat like that sometimes.

Two other comments, the chocolate chex has a seasoning packet in it and you make what is called Latte chocolate chex mix. That makes me really curious. I know I am way too late for that little comment.

And I just found out about 20 minutes ago a company makes a brownie pan that looks like a maze to me but it’s great if you only like the edge piece of brownies. Really expensive IMO but people on the comments say it’s built to last.

I have never made brownies from scratch that are like the nice gooey chewy ones like you make from a mix. I think I have all the stuff to try again. I tried several years ago and it was more like a chocolate cake then a brownie so I ate it sure but I was bummed. Anyway take care everybody.

Aaron, I have to ask and I’m too lazy to look it up, who or what is JEEPERSMEDIA?

JoshC, Jeepersmedia is a product guru who reviews odd toys and food products.., like someone we know. He is very funny and has made 65 videos! Please check him out… you won’t be disapointed! He’s on youtube, I should mention.

I know you can’t travel TO summer megaparty, but you sure can travel away from it. Sad but true.

Remember when all those people were getting poisoned to death on cruises? Good to see the industry learned a valuable lesson and started serving high quality, carefully prepared food.

Rev as long as I can boss Josh around that’s good enough for me! Accuse me of being shady huh Josh? I’ll show you! >:) And Happy SNT all!!

I’m sorry dan, I really am, but if you try and boss me around I will have you fires so fast your head will spin, lets see you try and get to me when they have security escort you out on a friday afternoon(so you dont get drunk, come back and shoot up the place, corporate policy)

That cruise looks so bad… once again, sorry, Matt. My cruise BETTER be great. Does anyone know if Princess is good? Only reason I ask is because 1) Im gonna miss a HUGE concert my friends are going to… and 2), IM GONNA MISS PART OF THE MEGAPARTY! AHH! Oh, I recantly saw Gabriel Igelasius (however you spell his name), if anyone is interested. And I FINALLY saw Indy… I didn’t like it. Any cruise advise from some vets?

Hey guys, wanna try to sync up some Friday the 13th movies on Youtube and talk about them while they air?

But what if I’m ALREADY drunk at work Josh? And how did you get promoted over me?

Cause I’m a snitch dan, the boss wasn’t happy with the interoffice scrutinizing of his decisions.

It’s up to the big boss of this area Aaron, but you have my recommendation.
you can be in charge of water cooler maintanence, what say you Rev.?

Rev I recommend he be demoted to janitor or some low level position that he can be bossed around by oh say…..a mid-level supervisor?

Transformers Classics=awesome.
Transformers Animated=proof Satan exists,and is more powerful than any of us previously thought.

Pffft! Who needs to drink water? That’s what alcohol is for! And besides a mid-level supervisor can fire the both of you!

And Rev, because of the awesome W.C Fields reference you too are my bud for life, whether you like it or not.

This is the company SNT annual weekly party. Let us all tie one on, and someone can sit on the copier and copy their butt. I am the big boss of this area, so I will tie my tie around my head and throw up in my desk drawer. Me and JoshC are buds for life. Rock.

haha I know man, I know.
You seriously NEED to put the bottle down buddy, theres a big world out there.

Only thing I did today was bake brownies and watch “Wanted.” It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t great, either. I say wait for DVD.

But Josh with enough alcohol you can practice all the “self dentistry” you want and it doesn’t hurt! (as much)

anyone getting guitar hero aerosmith tommorrow for Wii?
I’m waiting til world tour in september. Also getting my Ps3 in a couple weeks woo!

Chocolate shake Aaron, although mixing Coke into a chocolate shake is a tasty beverage.

Once out in pumpkinhead territory, I bought an “egg cream” from some backwoods devotchka in the early 90s and she put a real egg into it.

Say you have a beta fish and you are out of beta fish food and you forgot to buy more fish food when you went out today…is there anything you can feed said beta fish other than fish food that won’t kill him or make him sick?

Another Beta fish??
I hear they like that but I wouldn’t do it personally, umm, maybe tuna.
Wait, does anyone know if beta’s taste like tuna?

Matt, wish I could, but I’m 15. JoshC, shake is made! But we got no coke, but I HAVE TO MAKE THAT ASAP! It sounds good. So… anyone wanna Brawl??? My fc’s up above along with my Wii number

JoshC
He would probably eat another beta fish in a vicious fight to the death, but that just seems wrong to me. And I don’t have another fish. maybe if I tied a peice of canned tuna to a string and waved it around like it was swimming, he’d attack it and eat it…

Aaron, good choice my friend, you need to get on that coke/chocolate hybrid soon, it’s good stuff.

earthwormgoddess: I wouldn’t have the heart to let my little fishy friend eat what could potentially be an equally cool little fishy friend either, but I stand by my tuna suggestion.

earthwormgoddess, how attached are you to your fingers. It seems to me that offering your fish a bit of living flesh would be easier and more direct than tying tuna to a string.

Or are you an earthwormgoddess in the Earthworm Jim sense? Because then your problem solves itself.

JoshC
You’re probably right. The more I think about it, the more I think I should probably just get off my lazy ass and go to the Walmart for some real fishy food.

Jake- He runs from fingers. I am earthwormgoddess in the sense that I am on a lifelong crusade to help all little earthworms who find their way into the middle of a sidewalk on a hot day to the safety of the grass before they are dried to crisps or eaten alive by ants.

Sure dan, It must just be those wacky Canadians, but don’t tell me you haven’t even thought about it.

I am watching Charlie and the Chocolate factory on AMC Family. With Gene Wilder. You know, the one that’s good and doesn’t have a f’ed up ending.

I saw Wall-E yesterday and thought it was fantastic. Any fan of Pixar must see it immediately. Also, the cartoon before it, “Presto!” is hilarious and one of the best shorts they ever did.

Speaking of “themes,” tomorrow is the final entry in my 26-part “Things That Start With ___” series. Spoiler: It’s the letter Z.

Also, for SNL fans, and old-school SNL fans, NBC is running the first episode ever tonight in memory of George Carlin.

I am the Zinc Saucier of this area. It’s a lesser title than “Big Boss” but has double the prize money.

I’ll admit that I know a few things about run of the mill deviancy but I didn’t know that, thank you!

Thanks for the heads up Norbert; as soon as the crappy church show goes off, I’ll switch over to check it out…

Don’t get me wrong, nothing against church, just this local show -which I hear is marketed nationally- is just so “show me the money” feeling…I hope you guys get what I mean

2 minutes in and it’s better than anything on recent SNL…I grew up watching these old sketches when they’d come on Nick at Nite at 10pm as a 1/2 hour show called Best of Saturday Night Live

JoshC Your welcome! I know how it is like to be incredibly curious about those things. That is why I am well educated about that particular topic just being too curious for my own good.

The pictures really made it look so bleak. Sorry you had such a miserable half-fun time.. sometimes the half-fun times are worse than the full out “it sucked” experiences because you almost feel guilty complaining. Well, I do, at least. lol

Although I make no claims to be as funny or brilliant as Andy Kaufman, I think it’s important to note that skit right there is entirely responsible for everything I am.

A guy on another messageboard I visit recently went on a Princess cruise to Alaska (even further north!) and he said he had a great time. Here’s part of his travelogue.

Great post again, Matt.
Well, this is why I work hard at ducking out of all church events. I volunteered to be mentoring older guy for the youth teen troubled Catholic emo kids and we went to Six Flags all day. Wouldn’t you know it? Some poor kid got decapitated on the Batman ride. This is why I don’t volunteer. I need a drink.

If anyone hasn’t seen Man on the Moon, it’s worth it; that bit is featured in the movie as well

And here’s the second portion. Doesn’t look to bad if you asked me, just not tropical obviously. Though as he points out, some people were indeed in the pool…in Alaska! In cloudy, rainy weather (SE Alaska is actually considered “temperate rainforest”, so you can imagine what that means).

That said, no offense, but he did say that Alaska cruises seem a bit more “intellectual”, since of course the Caribbean cruises are all about having a good time, while here they often give detailed discussions about the native wildlife and Indian culture, etc.

Dude, one of the worst things I have seen. And I only caught the aftermath. Not what you expect at Six Flags. “One Flag!”

Matt I tried to join a match but it wouldn’t let me for some reason. I’ll try again in a little bit.

Damn Bill! Sorry you had to go thru something like that on what should have been a fun day! That’s unreal!!

Man Matt, that cruise sounds like it was AWFUL ! Oh well, at least you know to never go back there. Live and learn I guess. Oh and for whoever asked for my Brawl code again in the last thread here it is, 2019-9583-4389

Huh, I just read online that he wasn’t riding it. The poor kid hopped the fence to get his hat apparently. Man, I feel for his folks. They were all on a church trip too.
Another strike against organized religion.

I Googled the story and read the report; if it happened as the story reports, it makes it even more a tragedy….

GOOD LORD Bill I just read your post. I can’t imagine NOT being UTTERLY HORRIFIED at witnessing something TERRIBLE like that ! Do whatever you need to calm yourself down.

The Real Andrew, thanks! Thats the cruise Im going on! I don’t like intellectual… I’ll be in the pool!
Jake, Ultraman, GREAT MATCHES. My game didn’t save your fc, Ultraman… could I get it again? Oh, and for anyone willing to trade Brawl/Wii numbers, mine are on top. I am SO gonna watch SNL when it comes on (I live on the west).

Ah, I’m ok. It’s one of those things though. People aren’t suppose to die at amusement parks, you know? Especially a kid. That sucks.

Bill, dude. That sounds HORRIBLE! I feel sorry for his parents. Oh, ULTRAMAN, thanks for the fc. Mines up there somewhere.

Bill: wow, I’m sorry man, I just finished reading an article about that when I read your comment.

I got yours, Ultraman. Got mine? I’ll be on in a little while, but I gotta check something out first.

Jesus H. Christ, Bill, that’s awful. I’d buy you a drink in consolation if I could. Combined with RTW’s story about the stroller going down the escalator, it really reminds a person: The signs are there for a reason!

I love Andy Kaufman, and I loved Man in the Moon. It was out my senior year when we had to do a big biographical report on someone we admired, so I picked AK. For my presentation, I played the Mighty Mouse theme and did the whole bit. Then I handed out milk and cookies. It was totally awesome.

Actually doho outside of the teacher I can’t say that anybody else did get it. They were happy to get cookies though, and the teacher was cracking up so I consider it a success

Squee: that is 198 different kinds of awesome, but like doho, I must know, did they get it?

I think the problem is the constant struggle between humor and anti-humor and how they switch roles back and fourth through out time. Its so backwards that the first joke we learn, “why did the chicken cross the road?” is an anti-joke. How are kids really supposed to understand why it’s funny?

Nevermind Aaron I saw your Wii number in the top of the thread. I just added it.

I always thought “Why did the chicken cross the road” was more of a philosophical question than a joke.

Anyone else seen that old old email chain letter that has a bunch of famous people’s made up answers to this? My favorite is Hemingway: “To Die. In the Rain. Alone.”

Pretty much sums up Hemingway. No wonder the man killed himself…I don’t think I’ve ever read a more depressing fiction writer.

Aaron have you added my wii number yet ? I’m trying to send you a message but it wont let me.

I was taught it as a joke. Philosophical to me would be “which came first, chicken or the egg?” Of course, time has changed that into more of a question of science.

Cameron T: Hemingway is my favorite writer, and Robert Johnson is my favorite musician..
Damn, what does that say about me??

Jeez Louise, Bill, did you SEE it when it happened? Man, that’s horrible. You can have some of my parents’ vodka (Absolut; plus we got some Mai Tai mix).

why am I still up.
anyone else cursed with the fabled “nocturnal affliction”?

I am not sure I could ever do a cruise, period, but then again, I get antsy with the commuter ferry. Boats are just not my favorite.
I was so glad to see a new post, and then it was full of gloom, but oh well, mega party will be soon and then only one more month until September!
Also, I saw Wall-E last night. I don’t think this is a spoiler, but then again, i never join in the movie discussions here, so I cannot be sure what is considered one. My point being, I loved it minus the humans, they were waaay too cartoony. The robots were great, the humans reminded me of Silly Putty.
Happy SNT!

Heh, kb, I’ve heard similar complaints about all Pixar movies. That’s kinda why I prefer the old 2-D animation, actually. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve enjoyed Pixar’s movies, but…I still just prefer the old style.

I’m glad I read your review, Matt. I was offered a free spot on a cruise that someone backed out of, and I turned it down. I was starting to regret it, but this makes me feel better about my decision.

Also, I don’t want to sound totally against cruises; I still think they’re terrific. We just went on a really shitty one on a really shitty ship with a really shitty schedule. It’s definitely worth doing once, but twice and more is for people who absolutely adore it.

It seems to me like the Saint John cruise would be geared more toward the naturalist than the beach party type, like the alaskan cruise.

I sail every summer, have a boat, but for some reason I find cruise ships unsettling, don’t really know why

Every time I refresh the page and see the entry title I end up singing it: “The Haaaaate Boooooat!”

Hey guys, I have a question… I have this thing called Frozen X-Plosion, and I was wondering… it says you can add any liquid to it… should I try something with one of the sodas? the list is as follows (oh, and which ever getd the most votes I will make tomorrow)
Sierra Mist
Jones Surger-free Soda
Fresca Raspberry
Root Beer
Diet Coke
Diet Coke| No Caffine
And I think thats it, cause my parents took away all the Pepsi (NOOOOOO!!!) I will give a full review tommorow. VOTE FOR WHICH ONE I SHOULD BRAVE!!!

joshc- yes. since I have been back from vacation, i have been a wreck with the sleeping thing. Also, this whole sunshine thing that lasts forever and starts way to early is not helping.

Scratch Caffine Free Diet Coke. But I found:
Mountain Maze
AriZona: Kiwi Strawberry (Not soda, but whatever)

Sorry about the cruise, Matt. I’d love to go on one sometime if I can figure out which line/boat/itenerary would be best. Maybe NCL, cause it sounds like you had a better time on that one. Just need to pay off some bills first…

Stayed home tonight, cooked chicken chow mein, and watched half of Eagle vs. Shark. Hubby and I are trying to save money by staying at home. I love going out, so it’s hard to settle into “homebody” mode… but I’m working on it.

I’m workin on trying to unlock a few things in Brawl right now. Stages basically.

Squee The haaaaaaaaate boaaaaaaat…. neither exciting or neeewwwwww…. come abooooaaaaaarrrdddd… Hitler is expecting yooooouuuuuu….

Sorry to hear your Cruise sucked Matt, Its also a shame that you ended up in Saint John…they should have brought you to Halifax

*yawns* I pooped out too early last night…frikkin anemia and time of the month wiped me out. Still working on the second half of my Freaks and Geeks weekend Marathon….BillI thought you were talking about sixflags Great Adventure for a second there. That kid was stupid for doing what he did, but still, its a tragedy. i wonder if he will posthumously win a Darwin Award. For those who are’nt familiar…Darwin Awards are given every year to those who have ended their life by sheer stupidity or not paying attention. Like survival of the fittest I guess. To play Devils advocate for a moment…those warning signs on the fence, they look like props for the ride. Being the ride is to take place in a ware house.

On Cruises: I’ve only been on one, but my parents have been on several. You want to do Royal Caribbean. Their ships are awesome, and the experience is top-notch.

And for those of you worried about being on a boat: you won’t even realize that you’re on the water. The boat is so big you can’t even feel the waves.

Regarding the humans in WALLâ€¢E, kb they were supposed to remind you of silly putty! The whole point is that we had evolved into these helpless sacks of goo….And in any case, Pixar never does animation for the sake of realism. That would be boring. That’s why all their human characters (Especially the Incredibles, but all of them to date) are caricatures..)

*YAWN* Anyone answer my poll up there? I NEED ANSWERS SO I CAN… uh.., drink something horrible. Why do I do this to myself? Cause I’m curious… oh, and add
Grape Gaterade
Melon Gaterade
(and if I still have some) Strawberry Gaterade.

Aaron
All of them. At the same time. A giant devil’s concoction of sugary liquid.

I feel like I am going on vacation tomorrow. I’m not. I am actually leaving for a week long business trip that’s going to be just awful. But tomorrow is the MegaParty. And all will be right with the world.
Thanks for the kind words. I guess it did bother me a bit. I think about how dumb I was as a 17 year old and I can’t believe I made it to 30.

wow.. looks like i missed a pretty lively SNT.. - glad to see things are back to normal.. - i spent the day babying my new kitten and watching the documentary 10 Questions for the Dalai Lama..

now i’m getting ready to go hang with some buddies and celebrate “Day of Rey”.. - nine-hour marathon of Rey Mysterio matches.. - leading up to tonight’s WWE pay-per-view.. - all in all twelve hours of wrestling total.. - i’m pretty much one of the biggest dorks alive.. - have a swell day!

Alright, Cameron T…. I don’t think I’ll do that yet. The Real Andrew, come lunch time, (it’s still 8 here) I’ll make that! If it wins the vote. So everything has one vote on it (Cameron), except for R.B., which has 2. Awesome! Thanks for the input!

I live about an hour away from Saint John, in Fredericton. Many people call SJ “stink town” due to the pollution and fog. Did you notice the distinct smell? It’s kind of a cool city regardless, albeit a small one.

Don’t worry, JoshC, it’s normal. A lot of boys your age go through it. I wouldn’t go broadcasting it all over the internet though. That’s the kind of thing we keep to ourselves.

Bill, Good lord! I haven’t read the story yet, but that sounds wild. Yeah, I don’t blame you for wanting a drink after that.

Shaunfu, Did I read that right way up there? Did you actually ask what was wrong with the new Transformers Animated cartoon? I mean, you have seen it, right? Ok, I’m sorry, I’m just being a sarcastic bastard. Honestly, it’s just terrible.

OK guys… im leaving for a little bit… so answer the survey so I can make a final verdict? I would really apprieciate it. Thanks…. when I get home… X-Periement TIME!

I hope you liked our neck of the woods..though I am also perplexed as to why you would have even gotten close enough to get in our neck of the woods on a cruise:S

You should have went to the Taco Bell instead..that’s why we love Saint John..it has one of the only 2 taco bells in the province..so it’s a treat to drive an hour away and get some:)

Huh, they’re obviously everywhere here in California, Mandi. Of course, being close to Mexico, we kinda look down on them as “McDonald’s Mexican”; no offense. Conversely, we don’t have ANY Dunkin Donuts or Friendly’s here, so when I go visit my family in New England I have to go out of my way to visit at least one DD’s.

Missed SNT because I was out windowshopping with my friend. I got a cute shirt at Kohl’s for five dollars and some socks that have little Space Invaders guys on them for like two dollars at that Forever 21 place. After that, we went out for frozen custard. Then we went back to her house, where the guys were hanging out roleplaying. We watched a couple episodes of Ace of Cakes and half an episode of Sesame Street.

On Ace of Cakes, they made an Exorcist cake. It was creepy and awesome. It had the little girl sitting on the bed with the goop coming out of her mouth and they made her head spin around and everything.

I had no idea I was in the midst of a Canadian clench of blog commenters. I feel a little afraid, as Canadians have always made me a bit uneasy for some reason. Perhaps it is their openness, or rumors of their excellent health care plans.

I feel uneasy around blond haired people too sometimes, but not for the same reasons.

I need a large mug of strong chicory laced coffee and some pie now, to help me calm down after this canadian invasion.

no offense taken. It’s just such a novelty thing for me, and all my friends…and most people in our city to be able to jump in our cars and be able to order Taco Bell after only an hours drive! Haha..it’s especially fun being pregnant..I have an excuse to crave it. I love Dunkin Donuts (have to drive an hour to Maine to get them, though) and I’ve never eaten at Friendly’s. I’m gonna have to try it..

Don’t be afraid..why don’t you join us?? Some relaxing anti-depressants which you get from a trip to the emergency room that won’t cost you a thing will relax you. And..that Doctor could be gay..we’re okay with it. A little poutine could brighten your day.

I live in Freddy too!! ST J definitely does have a fine little smell to it..but definite worth it for the Taco Bell trips:)

I showed my wife the Andy Kaufman bit on SNL last night…she didn’t find it funny. Diff’rent strokes, I guess.

Holy hell, I am looking for honeymoon ideas currently and I can rest easy knowing that Carnival Cruise Lines will be set aside without guilt. Good thing you posted this Matt as all of my ideas to date have been based on this site. I am still pushing Disney World though (especially since neither of us has been).

drew do: I honestly can’t say I’m any authority: I really think you and anyone else should avoid this particular ship (Carnival Victory) because it was pretty undeniably bad. Though, had we been sailing to tropical climates, at least the deck experience would’ve been improved. We had a great time on NCL, and the RC line is supposed to be REALLY good.

Still, Disney trumps all of that, ESPECIALLY for a honeymoon. They treat honeymooners like gold in Disney.

Holy shit, that kid that got his head cut off at the Six Flags is from Columbia, right here in my town. Once again, we look like a bunch of idiots. I mean it’s tragic and all, but thanks a lot, decapitation guy. The funny thing is, just yesterday a bunch of us at work were talking about planning a trip there in a few weeks.

Does anyone live near a Carl Jr’s? I just found out about this, that what we call Hardees here has a whole different name in other places. Where is this, that Hardees is not called Hardees?

DJ D, you silly nut, you linked to someone else’s blog I think. That person can’t solve a rubik’s cube for shit.

There is something tragically fascinating about getting decapitated while chasing your hat. The more I think about it, the more it seems like a Six Feet Under intro, and there’d be some meaningful lesson symbolised there.

DJ D I live near a Carl’s Jr but I wish it was Hardee’s. Carl’s has nothing on Hardee’s.

I don’t understand why anyone would like a cruise. Being told what to do while being confined to one man-made place? No thanks. I’d rather explore mountains or rain forests.

Also from St. John’s, Newfoundland. Matt you should take a trip here sometime.

Royal Carribean is the best, by far. Their newer ship fleet is ridiculous. Awesome.

I’m with Jeff on this one. I don’t want to see the same people for a week straight in the middle of the ocean. Especially if the cruise was only serving beer in plastic bottles.

Hey guys i’m on my wii finally got the web browser! wooo just wanted to check out x-entertainment on my big screen! sweeet

Carl’s Jr. is in the west. I think it actually started out here in California, and sometime in the ’90s they bought Hardee’s and affixed the smiling star logo. So I was surprised when I took a trip to the Midwest and saw a fast-food chain with the Carl’s logo, but obviously a different name.

For me a a cruise wouldn’t be a good vacation. I guess it could be ok if the ship had alot of fun stuff to do and space to roam around in. And if it made some interesting stops. But overall, i’m just not that interested in cruises.

I’ve had spectacular experiences on Celebrity and Princess. Carnival is well-known as one of the worst cruise lines. It mainly caters towards spring-breakers and people with [poorly-behaved] children. As a result, they don’t really have to do much to get business, since their customers aren’t very discriminating.

DJ D We live near a Carls Jr. We are in Oregon. I have never been to a Hardees. Carls jr is pretty good except I only get the super star or whatever it is called from their menu because all the other burgers are like 3 dollars and that is just way too much for fast food. You almost spend 10 dollars just on one value meal! I would rather go to jack in the box or burger king. Carls Jr and jack in a box are far superior to burger king though. We didn’t have a jack in the box for several years because there was one in a bad neighborhood and someone got food poisoning and sued. Jack in the box closed and then just reopened about I dunno 4 years ago or so.

And I live in a small town and we have a taco bell. I can’t wrap my head around the thought of needing to drive an hour to one I think I would lose my mind.

Last week my best friend did the “I have 250 in my pocket and there are Wii’s in stock at walmart” thing again and it’s starting to piss me off. I have a feeling that if he did that then he wouldn’t be able to afford a video game for it or any accessories for a long time and it would just collect dust. There are SO MANY accessories that you need for the thing. Like one of those numchucks. I don’t think I would get smash brothers because I am not into those kind of games anymore it would get boring too quickly for me but I would definitely get mario kart just to try to play with you guys. I think that would be epic, if you want to get your ass handed to you by a girl

You have apparently become obsessed with drinking and gambling over the past few years. Your site used to be fun but now it’s a mess.

Matts not obssesed with drinking and gambling just because he goes on a few cruises. Besides, I think it’s safe to say he’s done with cruises for good.

Sorry to hear your cruise sucked Matt. I have been on two cruises and both of them were with Carnival. The first was a three day cruise to the Bahamas and the second was a seven day cruise to the Bahamas, Cayman Islands and Mexico. I can easily say that I’ve enjoyed both of them and even got married during the second one. Granted, some of the other cruise lines seem a little nicer, but the food was good on both and I loved seeing a few different places that I hadn’t been to before. Maybe this is just an example of needing to go to more than one port of call to get the fullest cruise experience.

Side bar - did you eat in the fancier dining area for dinner or just go with the buffet?

did not of you wii loving fuckers have a sega genesis when you were a kid? get an xbox360 damnit! lets play STREETS of FUCKING RAGE 2 on co op and beat the game on the “hardest” difficulty. thats 100 mins well spent my friends. fuck the wii, go 360.

my gamertag is DEVILETERNAL, freidn request me, then lets pick a time to kick Mr. X’s ass.

First of all, Ellaenchanted, if you have any monkey bread left, I’d love to have some. I love monkey bread, ever since I made it for a high school home ec class.

Second, I’m sorry your cruise didn’t go very well, Matt. The closest I’ve ever gotten to a cruise is pouring over an old Carnival brochure my mother had in our bathroom in the late 80s and early 90s, so I can’t compare, but a bad vacation is a bad vacation. I won’t even be going on vacation until the week after Labor Day, and then just up to New England to visit my best friend.

I had a genesis and loved it. I just don’t have any cash for a 360. I MIGHT get one later this year. MIGHT.

I’ve never heard of monkey bread, so i googled it, and I can say that i would like some too please

also I never saw the point of cruises, I hate gambling, I’m not very good at drinking, all you can eat buffets are a dime a dozen, and I’m ashamed of my body so that leaves out sun bathing. All and all I don’t think i’d enjoy myself

I Am Drunk: I agree, my alcoholism and gambling addictions are chiefly responsible for the state of this website, and it has nothing to do with having a job or playing video games.

jjwspider: No, we ate in the main dining room, which I didn’t mind, was fun/good enough. We were a little spoiled by the NCL cruise though, because most nights we sprung the cover charge to eat in the nicer, smaller restaurants, which were almost always amazing.

I’ve read a bunch of reviews from cruise addicts who were on this one, some of them say that it was “surprising” how bad it was, so maybe they were just having an off week or something.

Unfortunately,I can’t Brawl tonight,but I just thought I’d let any interested parties know that Target has Madballs puffy stickers.

Speaking of Brawl though,I was wondering today-which control method do you guys prefer? I’ve been using the remote sideways oldschool style,but it’s hard for me to smash attack with it. the 1 and 2 buttons seem JUST too far apart.
So should I switch to the nunchuck style or what?

Not this area, the other area. Of which I am the big boss. They have started calling me that when talking about me, even when I am not part of the conversation. Had I the equipment to do so, I would have such a stiffy over that. Stinkbutt totally had the right idea. The power has gone right to my head, and I think I’m gonna take over X-Day this year!

I just had to share this exciting data with my favorite blog commenting community. Even if X-E Matt is a drunken gambler, his readers are top notch as far as I am concerned. Eat more nads for higher ratings from the disgruntled faceless masses!

Sorry to hear about the cruise being kinda “meh.” I had an AWESOME time in AC with the new bf. Well, actually we stayed a couple miles down the road at the Best Western on Black Horse Pike, which we were very pleased to find was across the street from a HUUUGE asian supermarket where we promptly emptied our pockets for Pocky and Hell Money.

But yeah, we actually didn’t even hit the casinos really, just walked around the boardwalk while I dragged him into souvenier shops to laugh at jerk-off monkeys and giant bottles of Hershey syrup. Most of the time we were enjoying our hot tub (splurge!) and having hours and hours of hot, carnal sex in several different positions. I also got many massages, breakfast in bed, and was told I’m an angel no less than 500 times.