The X-Entertainment Blog!

05/18/2008: Edible Mutagen and Pitch Black lip balm!

I made a slight tweak to the blog’s usual #FFFFFF white background, opting for something slightly offfff-white…which in the past twelve hours has been compared to everything from coffee stains to gross old paper. I don’t know, I kinda like it. It’s a little less eye-draining, and a little more like delicious angel food cake.

Besides, I tend to get motivated by new car smell even when it’s virtual, and if a web background that looks like stale cake will help me write more often, it’s worth keeping.

I’ve written about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Cereal a bazillion times, most notably here and here, and while I probably haven’t hit the unspoken statute of limitations on writing about it again, I’m going to break the law: Edible mutagen cannot wait another six months.

If you can’t tell what’s going on in the picture above, that’s the back of a TMNT Cereal box from 1991, promoting one of the most awesome cereal premiums I’ve ever encountered. Instead of tossing some lame ten-cent toy or sticker in the box, Ralston saw fit to deliver us the unbridled awesomeness that was…edible mutagen. Or as it was officially known, “Honey Ooze.” The text blurb on the box confirmed that it was just like real mutagen, but quickly contradicted itself with notes on how it was made with real honey and suitable for spreading on food items. I’m not sure how that’s “just like” real mutagen, but I’m willing to roll with the illusion, because holy fuck…edible mutagen!

Side note: I’ve seen many excellent cereal box-backs in my day, but this one probably takes the X-Entertainment blog background color. Man, that’s great. I’m tempted to cut it out and frame it, and the only reason that I haven’t done so already is because I’m still debating whether I should drag the box to Kinko’s and have it blown up to standard poster-size first. Everything about it is perfect. From the random Playmates action figures littering the breakfast table, to the idea that Raphael would draw himself in Honey Ooze, no other cereal box-back has ever made me this happy.

Honey Ooze arrived in standard-sized condiment packets, with a neat font and graphical touches which reminded us that what we were about to eat could’ve turned us into humanoid dogs or cats. Since it’s a few years shy of two decades old, the once gel-like green substance has transmogrified into a thick, black, crispy sludge that I am absolutely not going to eat for the sake of your entertainment.

Since it’s quite likely that I own the last intact Honey Ooze packet in the whole universe, I can’t bring myself to open it. I’m sure you understand. When all else fails and my specialness fades, I’ll still have that. I’ll still be the only person on the planet with a sealed pack of edible mutagen.

Did I mention that I was quoted on the DVD box for Ghoulies IV? Okay, I did. I’ll still have that, too. Ghoulies IV, and a packet of old honey.

And a blog background color that looks like angel food cake.

And Mountain Dew Pitch Black lip balm.

I should hold off on writing about this until X-E’s next Halloween season, but for all I know, I’ll be dead by then. I’d like to believe that I’ll figure out some way to write about Mountain Dew Pitch Black at least once per Halloween season for the next fifty years, but the truth is, the well is running dry. Outside of buying a bunch of cutup cans shaped like an airplane from an artist/farmer on eBay, there isn’t much left to Pitch Black’s story…besides this lip balm, also available on eBay.

It’s a few years old, but does lip balm ever truly go bad? Not in my world. Not when saying “yes” means that I can never press the sweet, jellied nectar of Mountain Dew Pitch Black to my cold-cracked lips. If you’re lucky, you’ll find a bunch of these available at any given time on eBay, in a variety of container shapes, from regular tubes to the terrific can shown above.

I can’t say with any certainty that it tastes exactly like the soda did, which isn’t so much a knock on the product as it is an admission that I’m no good at figuring out if lip balm tastes exactly like certain sodas. It’s grapey and purple, I’ll tell ya that. Considering Pitch Black’s limited edition status, it’s a miracle that we got anything like this, and a total waste of a miracle if you don’t do your best to track down a tub of it before they all disappear.

If you need more motivation, check out X-E’s collection of Mountain Dew Pitch Black coverage: Mountain Dew Pitch Black - Mountain Dew Pitch Black II - Mountain Dew Pitch Black ICEE.

In closing, I was quoted on the Ghoulies IV DVD box.

I’m pretty sure “radicalizing” isn’t a real word, but it makes me smile.

Glad to see things are back to normal….Ninja Turtles and Pitch Black….X-E remains the most reliably same site on the interwebs, and I mean the nicest way

Wow, where (and WHEN) did you find the Pitch Black balm? Also, good to see you back posting again. This has the makings to be better than an SNT.

Terror: I grabbed mine months ago. Just searched, there’s another one available.

Missed you, Matt! My daily blog checks were beginning to be filled with despair…I’m so happy to see an update! Thank you!

Can it be? Am I actually going to be first in the posts this time? Well, this is something that will probably never happen to me again so I better saver the moment. Of course, if I keep rambling on and don’t shut up before long, I WON’T be the first post!

Anyway, it’e interesting you should mention some past blogs you’ve written Matt. I found something today that you talked about last summer. Do you remember Bubble Yum Bubble Gum ice cream that you wrote about? I was at the Commissary on-post today and lo and behold, there was a carton of Breyer’s Bubble Yum ice cream in the ice cream section! I was wanting some ice cream and couldn’t decide what to get so when I saw the Bubble gum ice cream, I knew I had to get it! I know you gave a negative review about it last year, but I have had bubble gum ice cream at Baskin Robbins and some other ice cream place (Bresler’s was the name, and unlike BR’s 31 flavors, this one had 33 flavors so it upped BR by two flavors) and I actually liked it! How did I like this? It wasn’t too bad, but I think I had more than enough for one serving. It didn’t make me sick or anything, just had me stop enjoying it and have it turn into milk and cream with gum bits in it. By the way, the gum at least to me is neither hard nor does it really become gum in my mouth. It seems to turn into a chalky substance and easy to swallow. I highly doubt it’s going to take seven years or however long they say it takes gum to go through your system after you swallow it, but you never know. One weird thing I noticed, it was the only carton of bubble gum ice cream they had. I also had to check the expiration date on the bottom to make sure it wasn’t left over from last summer. January 19th 2009 was the expiration date so I guess that means Breyers decided to bring it back out for another season.

Anyway, on another topic, I finally saw Iron Man today, so I can’t claim to be the last person who hasn’t seen it yet, or seem like the last. I can’t really say anything other than tell you if you don’t get to see it while it’s in theaters, you’re not missing anything by waiting for it on DVD, but if you do see it in theaters, it’s worth the money you paid to see it. It was good, but nothing to blow me away. I guess if you see one Marvel superhero movie, you’ve seen them all. Oh yeah, they also had a preview for the new Incredible Hulk movie. I swear the CGI Hulk in this movie looks EXACTLY the same as in the last. I guess it’s the story that matters, not the effects. OF course, it’s not Eric Bana who’s Banner now but some other actor and it looks like Liv Tyler is Betty Ross this time around.

Okay, I rambled on too much so I’m guessing that instead of being number one this time, I’m number five or six or somewhere down the line. Okay, very quickly, I don’t remember ever having Turtles cereal so the honey ooze was all new to me. This must have come out when the second movie came out because “Ooze” talk would be all the rage and everything liquidy the turtles promoted had to do with ooze. Also, remember very fondly you’re quote on the Ghoulies IV DVD box and have read some of your Mountain Dew blogs. You should mention something about Baja Blast, which I mentioned in the last thread and asking if there’s any place other than Taco Bell where I can find it. OF course, like last thread, if there was, that dismisses the whole point of me going to Taco Bell in the first place! Okay, more rambling so I’m going to shut up and see how far I’ve sunk in the post rankings.

Sorry for the double post, but it looks like number six. How could I let Mystie beat me? Oh well, she deserves it!!!!

man i miss pitch black so hard. i saved a few 12 packs of it and a couple 20 oz bottles. those that werent refrigerated ended up exploding in the texas heat, however. still got a few of those and some pb 2, though. really wish theyd bring back the first, non sour version. it was awesome

Well we’re less than six months away from halloween anyway so really, it’s more halloween season than not.

I dig the background. It’s subtle like….the whitest my running socks will ever get.

I admire your ability to put lip balm that is a few years only on your face, Matt. But then again I think you have ingested soda from the cold war era. By the way, what is the oldest food/drink consumed for X-E?

This was a great article,it reminded me of the time I flipped out in Kmart when I aw Matt quoted on the Ghoulies IV DVD. I was so excited that I purchased said DVD!

OK,that was a lie. But due to Matt’s quote being featured on the back,I came as close as I ever will come to owning one of the Ghoulies films.

Looks like I am slipping into summer mode already: insomnia at night and fatigue in the day.

Yea.. it doesn’t quite say its Mountain Dew… its a new advertising gimmick “Mystery Flavor” with a black bag and neon green writing. Between the bag colors and taste I guessed correctly “Mountain Dew” on the website doritosthequest.com. Imagine Lime and Salt with tangy sweet sugary edge. Kind of strange. But not really that bad.

I hear that Manimal. I was up late Saturday night and then today around I kinda slid myself into bed and konked out for 4 hours. At this rate, I will never recover from the 3-day Memorial Day weekend!

Actually, I have a bad feeling they’re going to asks for overtime next weekend. I’m already conjuring reasons as to why I can’t come in.

I remember something that I think was called “Swirlies” years back. It was oatmeal that also had those little gel packets that you could use to draw or whatever in your oatmeal.

And I just bought a Pitch Black lip balm… cylinder. You’re turning me into the compulsive spender I’ve always wanted to avoid being. Worth it.

I have never tasted mountain dew pitch black, But i’ll take this shame quietly to my grave.
Although I must ask..How much am I missing?
Is it the king of all Halloween related consumables??

Ahh, I was going through YouTube looking for old Saturday Morning and Disney Channel bumpers and commercials, and then you post. It’s a good time for nostalgia. (And one of the Disney Channel bumper series was for Halloween 1990. Boy, did THAT take me back. I wouldn’t be surprised if my sisters and I watched The Disney Channel that night, hoping to catch the DC-only special “Disney’s Halloween Treat.” I also realized where I remembered the Judd Hirsch-as-a-vampire special Matt reviewed last October from. Disney ran it every Halloween for years.)

Don’t ever, EVER open that Ooze. It probably has real mutating properties by now. Plus, it’s a collector’s item, like you said. It probably belongs in some kind of pop culture museum.

starwenn, thats hillarious.. I was bored out of my mind at work today from 7:30am - 4 (computer phone support) and was doing the same thing on youtube! looking up old 80’s Saturday Morning Cartoon commercials lol. My Buddy, TNMNT, schoolhouse rocks, time for timer, etc.. i even found the intro for an OLLLD fav cartoon the monchichis! LOL I loved them, scooby, and the Shirt Tails in the early 80’s.

Man, I saw like 8 of those Mountain Dew things at Big Lots. I didn’t bother getting one, however. I never liked Mountain Dew.

Long story short, a girl I know is borrowing my old laptop computer for a few months….I’m trying to find a desktop background that will make her smile the first time she sees it. She likes the Care Bears, and Grumpy Bear is her favorite bear…so I want to find a Desktop background with Grumpy Bear.

Google Image search, a flickr search, and a google of “Grumpy Bear Wallpaper” have all failed me thus far.

I’m one of those people who, like good ol’ Homer Simpson, would pick Crab Juice over Mountain Dew.

Just noticed the new stickers up top! Awesome. Question: Will the Summer Jukebox be making a comeback?

Cameron: I did a quick search but every instance I found was of an all gothed-out version of Grumpy.

Matt: First thats awesome that you, someone who isn’t even a film reviewer by nature (yes nature makes critics, shut up) made a quote on a dvd.
Second you should experiment and see if you can make some eddible honey mutagen of your own. Just get some green food coloring and maybe a bit of yellow, I know you could do it, hell, you MUST do it.

Mountain Dew is NOT for the faint of heart;) !!! And as always Matt GREAT post ! Your hard work means more to us then you’ll ever know. =)

Today was cold, it felt like an autumn day and had me wishing for the halloween season. Did I mention I have a Disneyworld holiday booked for halloween? I will be on Disney property–halloween DAY!

By the way, I should probably mention that my whole lemon lime sierra mist rant was based mostly on jealousy…because we don’t get Siera Mist in Canada. In good news however, I just saw Iron Man, and it was pretty much one of the better movies I’ve seen in a long time, and YES I stayed in the theatre with 30+ people to watch the end credits to see the preview for the sequel and the 3 seconds of clip was TOTALLY worth it

I’ve got a Black Cherry Vanilla Coke lip balm that tastes like black cherry, vanilla and Coke well enough but still manages to be off-putting enough that I only used it once.
I think I like the new background color. Reminds me of dyeing paper with coffee back in elementary school to make it look old timey.

Matt You should frame the back of the box with the packet of Honey Ooze. I think they added the word honey in there so the parents wouldn’t worry about the kids eating it. But anyway you know those framed autographed (or not) movie posters with the framed section of film with it? You should display it like that. Or not whatever I aint your mutta. I like the new color, it reminds me of white cake batter. And change the dancing santas already!! It’s almost Christmas again!! AHHHH!!!

I seen I think it was on ebay I’m not sure lip balm over a year ago that was pitch black flavored with the label on it. It was in a rectangle container with one of those black necklaces with it. Black lanyard? It didn’t look official but who knows. I like it when they make obscure flavors of lip balm for some reason. I have only used lip balm a couple of times. I like the cherry chapstick, I got a stick once about 5 years ago.

There is a woman that sells purses, billfolds, and wallets made out of koolaid blasts or whatever the individual caprisun type of drink baggies are. She sells ones that are caprisun too. But anyway at Office Max the other day I saw the EXACT same thing with pencil cases!! It was cool but still what a way to rip off a small business.

BJ Hey buddy, two things. Baja Blast is exclusive to Taco Bell. I drink it from time to time when I am there, it’s refreshing and something you would drink during the summertime. You should see a sign at your local Taco Bell that says Baja Blast only at Taco Bell or something along those lines.

And also, bubble gum does not take 7 years to pass through. It’s like when a little kid swallows a penny. It goes through in a day or so. It’s also safe to drink coke and eat pop rocks at the same time. Your welcome

And last but not least…
Cameron T. Growing up and still now my old bedroom has care bear wallpaper. Too bad I can’t rip off a big chunk of it and scan it for you.

Here’s a cute picture I found maybe you can make cute wallpaper for her using that. If you want I can whip up something. If you give me your friend’s name I could even put her name on it. It would only take 15 minutes or so. I have done stuff like that and I think I am not a pro at it but I am good.

Anyway you guys I needed to get going to walmart about an hour ago. I need to pick up salad, milk, diet coke, some liquid brown crap your supposed to be able to make instant coffee with, among other things. Chat atcha later.

To repeat a point already made by dohopoki, honey is the only food that never goes bad. So if you suck down that sweet, old, black honey, you probably won’t die, and if you DO mutate, you will most likely become a super powerful honeybee.

“I’m a King Bee
And I can buzz you all night long
When you hear me buzzin’
You know there’s some stingin’ goin’ on.”

Matt, I like the new background color. I think it fits with the blog design being your old Trapper Keeper.

And it’s definitely subtle enough that I probably wouldn’t have noticed it unless you mentioned it.

Okay, and seriously…what the HELL is wrong with the Doritos people?! MOUNTAIN DEW FLAVORED DORITOS?! Chicken Doritos aren’t far off. Although, I actually liked those cheeseburger ones from a while back, so maybe some kind of funky chicken ones would taste good. I can’t even imagine what Mountain Dew Doritos taste like. Therefore, it is now my mission to find them.

I don’t mind the background to much. It will take some getting used to. Oh and honey does in fact go bad if not stored properly. If it isn’t stored in a tightly sealed container then it loses it’s smell, flavor and usually crystallize. So if that honey Matt had didn’t have anything added to it, the honey wouldn’t kill him if he ate it, it just wouldn’t taste very good. But it has a coloring to it, so it might not be the best to eat it.

Growing up, I would eat nothing but the Ninja Turtles Cereal for about 3 years, and the major selling point was that damn packet of Ooze/Honey!

If I happened to get to the breakfast table later than my brothers, I would always miss out and refuse to eat. Luckily my mom apparently knew the secret of the ooze, as she had an entire plastic Squeeze bear full of the stuff.

I’ve always heard that honey is the one food with an indefinite shelf-life. But holy crap that stuff is indescribably horrific looking.

FYI: Toon Disney is showing Spider-man and His Amazing Friends (the 80s cartoon with Iceman and Firestar)weeknights at 8PM eastern. Great stuff.

Wow I had no idea that there was edible ooze with Ninja Turtles cereal and I used to eat that stuff all of the time. Now I wish I had a time machine so I could see what it tasted like. Also speaking of Mountain Dew..

Apparently there’s three new flavors of Mountain Dew. I didn’t know this until I spotted a lone bottle of Supernova at the super market yesterday.
It’s a strawberry and melon flavored soda with strawberry being the dominant flavor. Not bad I say and as someone who doesn’t particularly care for strawberry soda that’s saying a lot. I haven’t seen the other two anywhere but I’m eager to try them. Apparently one is going to become the next Code Red while the other two will go the way of Pitch Black. Maybe you’ll have Mountain Dew Supernova lip balm to post about in a year.

That box back is fantastic! When I was a kid I always set up my figures around my bowl (in case the shredder or god forbid skeletor decided to attack the breakfast table). Totally takes me back, and the fact that it is Raph is icing on the cake.

The Doritos flavor family was complete in my eyes with the arrival of Bleu Cheese. Awesome….

Know what? Just realized that Lip balm isn’t actually to scale with an actual can of Moutain Dew.

I hope you aren’t lying, X-E Matt. As a pillar of the community you are trusted not to mislead.

That’s a lot of lip balm. Does it leave an alluring purple tint on your face or is it plain old invisible balming.

I’m also sad that you’re lying, because I like a grooming product you can smash somebody over the head with.

Oh my goodness its good to be back at my own computer. I just spent the last 4 days or so in iowa, so its good to be back where there are trees and shit. also, great job with surprising me with not one….but TWO NEW POSTS for my return. i’ll have to go on vacation more often.

The whole fact that I ever thought it was brings into question if I even knew what lib balm was.

I like this background color. Although I loathe the word, I would say this is pleasantly “creamy”.

O maaaaaann.
You better not be fucking with us Advent-urers.
I see all that wonky text on the cotton canvas behind the can.
Something about a TALISMAN?!
*shakes head*
Awww man, I really can’t BEGIN to wrap my brain around it, either.
I gots ta WORK.

Is it just me….. or was ninja turtle cereal just Chex with marshmallows? Mellows? Mallows? Anyway, not complaining just saying! I liked it

Hello Glorybee Foods Inc, I have this friend and he has a packet of your “Honey Ooze Food Topping” from a box of 1991 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cereal. It has never been open. Would he suffer any fatal harm if he eats it? He says he’s not going to do it but if you can give me any info on this promotional product from 17 years ago, maybe some charts and graphs, I think maybe he’d be more willing to try it. He’s ate some pretty weird stuff.

Hey Matt, I just reread the Ninja Turtles cereal article and it mentions and shows “Monopoly” and “Green Slime” cereal. I don’t remember those at all. Do you still have them and if possible do a blog entry on them at least?

Could you imagine a “Clue” cereal with all of the shapes being the murder weapons?

There’s a Hungry Hungry Hippos game but it’s cleverly disguised under the name Kix. You just get a friend and sit on opposite sides of the table then dump the contents of the box out in the middle. The hard part is keeping count.

Oh my God you guys, I am so fricking happy right now. Why? Because I have a Mighty Muggs Lando Calrissian and Indiana Jones Adventure Heroes. And people say that there are no more cool toys.

Hey peeps. I felt left out of the blog game, so I finally got one. Click my name to visit. Kittymao made me jealous of her blog so now I have one too. Please comment or something. Cause I feel pretty lame.

Clue cereal is the best idea I have ever heard. Risk would also be amazing because it would allow me to replace all the “armies” lost to my cat’s appetite for board game accessories.

mmmmm….I’m consuming Taco Bell again for the 2nd time in 2 days…I’m determined to try the whole 79 cent menu…triple layer Nachos this time…woo! and a mango strawberry frutista smoothie slushie thingy!…which would be fab with a shot of rum…and no… don’t think I’m going to be trying the Mountain Dew Dorito’s …there are a few things that don’t need fruit flavor and those are one of them…I don’t want to think about juice while I’m eating doritos

Why can’t there be a site like this that makes me want to go jogging? Everytime I log on here, I buy more junk food at the grocery store and my waistline expands. Hmmm. Runners high vs. Doritos. Where is Bill? Bill how do you handle this?

Crap, forgot to pimp the new blog by linking to it. I’ve got to slow down, I have 40,000 things I wanna write about, but I want comments on each of em. Arrrgh!

While I don’t want to get used to the new background, I must admit that the faded yellow does fit in with the Trapper Keeper look. This blog HAS been up for a few years, so it’s quite likely that the paper would’ve yellowed by now

Also, with the Mario figures from the last blog…excellent finds, as I went to 2 TRUs so far and haven’t even seen a trace of them

HOLY CRAP!!!! I remember making such a mess with my honey ooze that my mother saw it fit to ban me from using it on my cereal in subsequent boxes. This really brings me back to the days where my greatest fear was losing one of Leonardo’s 58 brown ninja weapon accessories

What I wouldn’t do to have the awesomely incredible TMNT cereal on store shelves again. Or even the Spider-Man cereal (that was exactly the same cereal with “different” marshmallow shapes - not that you could ever tell).

dohopoki Do you know what chapstick is? Lip balm is like that, mostly girls use it. Like little girls that use it to act like it’s pretend lipstick. It tastes good on your lips because it comes in different flavors. Lipsmackers is a common name brand. It’s cheap, you should get some at the grocery store just to see what it is like. Little boys use it too from what I have heard. Which is fine because some of them come in root beer, strawberry, bubble gum, dr pepper, cherry, etc. all sorts of flavors. If you eat it straight out of the tube though, yuck.

Oh I know what it is, it’s just my thinking about that can being to scale was poorly thought out.

Ahhh ok :) And to think, for a moment in time I thought there was someone on the same planet I am on that didn’t know what lip balm is.

I have had a couple good flavors of lip balm…and I think I even had one in a can like the pitch black…it was Dr Pepper though I’m pretty sure…Got it at a boardwalk arcade with some tickets and tokens last spring…I also have a twinkies flavored lipsmackers and a cinnabon flavor.

sorry to double post….but if you hit up stores like Claire’s they always seem to have the little novelty lip balms…Icing, another acessories store carries them too…

Actually, this sort of relates to the 2007 Advent calendar. I thought I should post back at the box 23 discussion threads, but not sure if anyone still checks those. So here you go, not sure if anyone else saw these last christmas:

Was it a large box of cereal, with one little packet of mutagen? How were you supposed to ration out the mutagen if you only got one little soy sauce packet of it with a full box? I may be misunderstanding some crucial element of the mutagen distribution process here.

As a lover of condiments, I am disheartened to think that 9/10 of the turtle cereal experience would be mutagen free. I’d be hoarding that packet for the very last bowl.

So, anyone else gonna try for the Wii Fit at midnight? I’m gonna go hang at Wal-Mart around 10 or so. My wife thinks I’m going there for moving boxes, but its for her anniversary present. Hope I get one â€“ she really wants it. If I strike out there, I guess I’ll try Best Buy in the AM, as maybe some of the high schoolers aren’t out for summer yet.

How about a 7-Up cereal? All of the pieces would either be lemon or lime flavored. Since Trix already has those pieces it wouldn’t even be that weird.

A 7-Up cereal would only be awesome if the pieces were lymons. And lymon-flavored.

I just came across a jar of Goober in my desk! This was the best stuff when I was a kid. It scares me to think what they put in this stuff to keep it from needing refrigeration, but it’s still awesome!

For anyone who doesn’t know what Goober is, it’s a peanut butter and jelly combo. There’s a pic of it on my blog. Goober rules!

Hmmm…on what kind of arcane list is that Pitch Black Lip Balm sitting on? Something having to do with a Protective Talisman for Sumo wrestlers against Bees?

Anyway, Matt’s mention of eating that Honey Ooze for our enjoyment reminded me of that time he ate Nads hair removal cream. I think that was the first X-E article I ever read. It was either that, or the Green Bamboo Peanut. What was your first X-E article?

Woo! I just have to share with everyone, remember the Cracker Victory/SNT post? I posted my goal was to get a job with benefits and a salary? Guess who was just offered one today!

I could just cry, but I think I’ll go to target and buy those Indiana Jones action figures in celebration instead.

And to stay on topic, I remember owning a Michaelangelo cereal bowl that came with a purchase of cereal. I want to say it was the TMNT cereal, but don’t quite remember. Anyone?

All this cereal talk made me think of a survey. Name some food items that you’re surprised have never been made?

I’m kinda surprised that Lifesavers doesn’t have a cereal or even gum. They tried juice in the mid-90s and there’s a sherbet now with them. You’d think they try a Trix-type cereal or some fruit gum.

Heck, you can put any fruit juice company in the I’m surprised there’s no cereal or gum or even a fruit flavored candy. Can you imagine Kool-Aid, Hi-C, Hawaiian Punch, etc cereal? Or how about ice cream? A skittles/jolly rancher/starburst type candy?

Hi-C and Hawaiian Punch both have fruit snacks, but not Kool-Aid. I’m surprised by that.

Or how about Garfield’s frozen lasagne? I don’t remember him even being on packages of it when his two movies were out. Or even his 90s cartoon.

I’m actually kinda surprised that they haven’t slapped a cartoon character (Scooby-Doo, Garfield, Snoopy, etc.) on any pet food that I know of. The closest I’ve seen is Scooby-Doo Doggie treats.

I’m surprised that other than White Castle frozen burgers, no other major restaurants have tried to putting their food into stores. I would buy a Pizza Hut frozen pizza/sauce or a bag of frozen McNuggets.

Holy crap, was that ever frustrating! I think my connection is finally fixed, this time. But now, the iMac is all cattywhompus. Wow, have I got a lot of catching up to do just on my webcomics…..

Based on the comment above, I just re-read an old article and had many much needed laughs. Pictures of the baby Matt eating his sister’s Nads and the voluptuous and hirsute MaryLou made it worth while. I feel so much less like killing now! Thanks, archive!

JLAJRC: Taco Bell also has food in the supermarkets too. They have taco and burrito making kits (where you have to purchase the beef separately) and cans of beans and I think they have a sauce out too.

I’m on lunchbreak so I figure I’d type a quick post. First of all, I purchased an advance ticket for the new Indiana Jones movie off of Fandango. It looks like the local theater is running it round the clock starting at midnight. I made a purchase for a 9:30 show Thursday night because I assume most of the shows will be sold out during the day. Also a good way to start a long four-day holiday weekend.

Also, I have been skimming through many of the posts and I saw a lot of talk of cereals brought up. While I don’t have any idea for a new cereal, I do have a fond memory of one old cereal that I haven’t seen come up yet on this site. Does anybody remember Morning Funnies cereal? This was a cereal that had its shapes out of smiley faces, but the real reason for buying the cereal was that you had comics on the back with a panel that opened up to more comics. I thought it was a neat cereal and I didn’t hear anything bad about why it was discontinued. Probably just lost the popularity and sales were down for so long. Oh well, it was good while it lasted.

By the way, anyone get the new Special Edition Indiana Jones DVDs? I tried reading what the Special Features were on the discs when I was at Best Buy on Sunday, but I couldn’t read anything because it was all blocked by a comic book that the three movies had packaged with them. Is the comic book supposedly the special feature? Do these have the same special features that were released on the Box Set back in 2003? Guess I should check the Indiana Jones website for my answer.

Well, that’s all I have to say for right now. Be back later to join in the X-E posting fun!

How about the soda companies making ice cream. I think vanilla coke/cherry coke ice cream would be good. I think there was a limited edition A&W Root Beer Float flavor once, but that’s about it.

about the chicken doritos. They do exist. I’m eating buffalo & ranch doritos right now. and have see hot wing/blue cheese i think. Correct me if I’m wrong. Or do these flavors not fall under the Chicken category?

I don’t think those Doritos would fall into the chicken category because they’re not so much “chicken” flavored as they are flavored with the seasoning used on buffalo/hot wings.

I have seen a chicken flavored cracker called “Chicken in a buiscit” which is not too bad.

Close but no cigar BgBlyStyle. I can can of see them being classified as chicken but DC is right it is more about the seasoning instead of the chicken.

I remember Morning Funnies cereal! And Monopoly cereal was the best! It was basically Cinnamon Toast Crunch with marshmallows in it…which, after it disappeared, made me think packets of cereal marshmallows should be sold separately so you can add it to any cereal you like…in a perfect world, I suppose…

I really like these chips that are sold in my local grocery store. They’re vegetable flavored. I can’t remember the name right now, but they’re really good.

Home sick today on the couch, and now I have tons and tons of blog stuff to read, so thanks Matt (I was at the parent’s house without internet for awhile) Yay for bloggy goodness!

Also, I am FINALLY joining the rest of the civilized world - I borrowed Lost, season 1 from a friend and I am on episode 6. Good stuff. Prior to this, I had never watched even one episode.

Hope you get to feeling better Muppet Baby, sounds like your at least set for entertainment.
I’ve tried to get into Lost but just can’t do it but then again I’m just now getting into Battlestar Galactica so maybe I need to give Lost another chance.

Really? I have never seen those. You know what taste a lot like Doritos but slightly different and a 100x more addictive? Sun Chip: Garden Salsa. They take a few to get used to but they’re full of flavor and a lot less dusty (still dusty though). I eat one and then I got to eat the whole freaking bag.

I recently saw a new Sweet Chile flavor from Doritos. It comes in a purple bag. I haven’t tried it because it doesn’t sound like something I would like.

Doho: Yea, they come in a yellow bag. Although when I looked up Doritos on Wiki they listed a couple of flavors I’ve never seen, like “Ranchero” or “Poppin Jalepino.”

Does anyone remember the Extreme Ranch flavor that came out about 8-10 years ago? It used to come in bright lime green bag.

I used to love it, but it wasn’t out very long. I also really like the Pepper Jack Cheese ones.

“Thanks for your inquiry! Wow, it’s just incredible that your friend
still has this “vintage” item! Technically, honey never spoils unless
exposed to excessive moisture (edible honey was found in the tombs of
the pharaohs!), but unfortunately we wouldn’t be able to give an “all
clear” to consume the honey ooze due to its age, as well as the added
color. Unfortunately we no longer have any paperwork regarding the
“ooze”. However, we would be very interested to know your friend’s
reaction upon consuming the “ooze”. We are all fascinated to hear that
someone still has a package! We have a package and the cereal box framed
on the wall outside the President’s office here at our facility, but I
don’t think anyone here would eat it.

We’d love to see photos or
hear a testimonial if your friend decides to go ahead with the
“experiment”.
Thanks again!

hmmm, I tried posting before and it never showed up, maybe I was too clost to the truth.

Anyway “protective, talisman, bee, vizualize and possibly summon” are all on the sheet behind the dew can. Adventures Unite.

Also the odd placement of the old Ghoulies refrence not once but twice, hmmmmm, wonder if its a coincidence that the sheet says protective and tailsman and thats also the title of one of the chapters on the Ghoulies 2 DVD.

How cool is it they responded to you Doho? You know they’re dying to see if Matt actually eats the “ooze” or not.

I’ve actually had some luck in the past getting responses like this for various old promotional items, that’s why I gave it a shot.

BgBlyStyle: I was reading your post about Blazin’ Buffalo & Ranch Flavored Doritos and I just happened to be eating those exact chips as I read it! Weird, and I didn’t scan the posts beforehand either.

For the one that mentioned Chicken Flavored Crackers, at our Shoppettes here on post, they have what is called Chicken Biskit, and yes, that is how they spell it. I don’t know if these are the same chips you were refering to, but they do have a Chicken type flavoring to them.

Okay, I hope you don’t mind if I get a little off-topic here, but I remember an article Matt wrote a while ago about the best Garfield snack foods. One item I wish he mentioned was Garfield Pasta by Franco American. What was cool about this pasta was that instead of having the usual tomato paste that most Franco American pastas carried (such as the popular Spaghetti-Os), this had a pizza-type which made the pasta that much better. They had a regular Garfield pasta which I think was called Garfield O’s, and another that had bits of sirloin burger in the pasta, kind of like Spaghetti O’s with Meatballs. Of course, this was ten times better than meatballs. Boy, they sure hit the spot for an after-school meal!

Oh, speaking of Franco American Pasta, why is Campbells now producing the Spaghetti O’s line? Did they buy out Franco American or did the two merge? I guess the reason I’m asking is because I thought the quality of the pasta was much better under the Franco American banner than it is now under Campbells. Actually, you had more of a variety with Franco American because besides the Spaghetti O’s line, they also had Garfield pasta, Where’s Waldo pasta and other pop culture franchises. I was going to mention some earlier pasta favorites such as Pac-Man pasta (which actually had a chicken pasta in their line) and Smurfs pasta, but I just remembered they were under Chef Boyardee. Of course, you don’t see too much out of the mainstream Chef Boyardee pasta line these days either. Anyway, I’m rambling on again so I better quit.

Oh, one other point, I think what got me thinking about Garfield pasta was someone mentioning Garfield Lasagna so that triggered my ramble. Of course, thinking about lasagna got me thinking about the old On-Cor frozen dinner line, but that’s something different for a different rambling time.

holy crap Dan, that was always my favorite snack of choice on ski trips in high school. Thanks for bringing me back!

oh man, chikin in a biskit is like crack in … uhm, a cracker?
yeah.
Haven’t had those in a year or two.

and dood- you yoyally have to eat it and let hose glorybee folks know- the seem so EXCITED that someone still has a box of the stuff.

I’ll still grab a box of Chicken Biskit and a can of EZ Cheez every now and then just to keep part of my childhood alive.

And I’m with kittymao Matt, you’d be legend around Glorybee if you ate that stuff.

You know what? I think that green mutagen honey packet just defied science. Wasn’t there an article about 3,000 year old edible honey being found in the Giza pyramid in egypt? It was found in a jar, and it was safe to eat. But then Matt has a packet of honey from 1991, and it appears to be unedible. Wow. They also say that honey is the one food that will never go bad. Maybe it has to do with the green coloring that made the honey go bad.

By the way, I just finished watching the Ernest Disney spacial from 1990. It’s the one where he was the first to ride on Splash Mountain.

I always pine for Halloween around mid summer, usually after the 4th of July. Halloween 08 I’m ready for ya.

Never had Chikn n a Biskit, or whatever its called. I would advise against eating the honey however. Hey, fellow bloggers â€“ how often do you update? How long do you let a post acquire comments? I know a ton of people here have their own XE web o’ blogs. Kthxbai.

I can’t believe that response about the Ooze! How awesome. I still wouldn’t eat it though

Muppet Baby, I hope you’re feeling well soon. Enjoy Lost, you’re coming up on one of my all time favorites ever (episode eight). I’m one of those oddballs who pretty much loves every episode though, so take it with a grain of salt I guess

TCC update when you want to, it’s your blog, your rules. As for comments, if people like your stuff they’ll hit the archives and comment if they’re so inclined. That’s my take on it anyway, like I said your blog, your rules.

Since I mentioned a Clue cereal before, why not some Clue fruit snacks. They can either be based on the weapons or characters.

Prof Plum- Plum, of course.
Miss Scarlet- Cherry or Strawberry
Colonel Mustard- Lemon
Mr. Green- Lime or green apple
Mrs. Peacock- blueberry
Mrs. White- A mystery flavor

Best Doritos ever were easily the Cheetos Doritos - Doritos chips with the Cheetos flavoring, they were delicious. As for totally wrong - click the link for Strawberry Flavored Cheetoes, WTH!

Roughly 45 degrees here today but it’s stinkin May! Getting ready to go to Hawaii though so the weather should be a lot better….

Sorry for the double post, but apparently there is Milk Chocolate flavored Cheetos and Honey Butter Doritos as well.

Mark Summers is on TV and he always make me jones for XE. Thanks for that, Matt.

Terror Claws Cole: I try not to eat Doritos before I run but after….God help them. Thank goodness I eat all I want because they’ll just make more.

Me, I update whenver I feel like it. Whenever an idea pops into my head, I type it. There are some bloggers that have a new update every day, and when they skip a day (they’re allowed), you just get kind of sad to see there’s no new stuff to enjoy. So, you peruse the archives!

As for comments…not all of us can be Matt. Unlike the Wordpress blogs, my Blogger blog has no standard issue Counter, so I recently installed one, and I’ve since hit over 200 views starting from may 10th. I probably would have about 200+ more thanks to that Muppet Show blog I did last month.

Back to the comments…I don’t know how to attract them. I’ve ran blogs on 2 different sites and I’ve rarely gotten comments (aside from a few really good ones). The first thing is to have a circle of fans/readers. For most of us, its our fellow X-Ers. I’ve had a blog for 2 years and I still wish I got comments on everything…I guess I’m spoiled by X-E, where every blog gets about 100 comments.

Matt you would be my personal hero for the rest of my LIFE if you ate that ooze ! =)

Doho, you magnificent bastard! Well done.
However, I too am in the camp of of “Matt should NOT eat the ooze” not so much for his safety but for historical preservation. There would be the inevitable “eater’s remorse”, etc. afterwards.
Just say no to ooze eating.

“Back to the commentsâ€¦I don’t know how to attract them. I’ve ran blogs on 2 different sites and I’ve rarely gotten comments (aside from a few really good ones). The first thing is to have a circle of fans/readers. For most of us, its our fellow X-Ers. I’ve had a blog for 2 years and I still wish I got comments on everythingâ€¦I guess I’m spoiled by X-E, where every blog gets about 100 comments.”

I just have a blog for the heck of it. If people find it and comment, cool. If not, it just gives me somewhere to vent or post randomness.

Mystie Hehehehehehe

JLAJRC I think I have seen Garfield on promotions before where you buy a certain amount of frozen dinners and pay shipping and handling and send the UPC’s out to get a garfield plush toy or something. I might google that later just to be curious. Koolaid has products they try out from time to time.

I remember they had on Tombstone or another frozen dinner a promotion where you sent off for a colletion of Simpsons posters that I wanted badly in the late 90’s but my Grandma wasn’t going for that because of one reason. She didn’t buy frozen pizzas! I whimpered everytime I saw Bart and Lisa on that pizza box.

I still have the flattened cereal box with Homer on it that was the cinnamon donuts cereal. That cereal left a film on the roof of my mouth but I am glad I have the box! I could either of picked Bart or Homer, I was broke at the time.

They have those frozen appetizers that are the TGI Friday brand. I have had the Mozzarella stick ones they are very good. Like the kind that Jack in the Box makes.

Onto my last comment to you, JLAJRC. I buy bags of frozen chicken nuggets to snack on. I haven’t had mcnuggets in years and years but I think the chicken nuggets I have been buying are close or the same as chicken nuggets. And on my blog (click my name) you will see a recent review of dinosaur shaped Jurassic park nuggets.

Oh yeah, they still sell the A&W Root Beer Float ice cream here. At a convenience store here they used to sell Barq’s root beer float w/ vanilla ice cream on the bottom half and the frozen root beer on the top in a tube type of thing that you squeeze up in an individual sized container. I only had it once it was pretty good.

If I had legions of admirers cheering for me to eat ooze, I would not only eat ooze, but I would also post pictures of myself doing so. Because I like to please people, and also because I like ooze.

Speaking of chicken nuggets, last night, a Nugget Incident: ate a nugget from Wendy’s and was shocked and appalled at the texture. Chicken frosting! Creamed and fried. Never again. If I’m going to eat the flesh of a beast, I want it to confront my teeth with the tasty resistance of MUSCLE.

I just want to throw it out there that I do not blog to get comments. I blog because I feel like writing stuff down and have people read it. What I do like about the comments is the feedback: is it good? bad? funny? are people reading it? Obviously people are, and I’m very happy about it

I’m also aware that there are folks just like me, obsessively F5′ing the pages to see if anything new pops up, but only leave comments when I have something to say.

Matt…Don’t eat The Ooze! Hey…it sounds like some really dumb jingle in a dumb 80s PSA, doesn’t it?

InvaderNorb: I know that you don’t blog for comments. I meant to say that I too blog for the heck of it, but I enjoy reading other’s blogs very much, that’s why I added you to my list of blogs.

Mystie,
Just wanted to share…I just tried to go to your blog, and the network here at work flagged it as pornogrpahy!! CONGRATS!!! Now I just hope that doesn’t send an alert to the dude with the big office.

Day 2 of being sick on the couch. Damn Crohn’s Disease - I keep missing work and I am broke. Oh well - at least I have LOST season 1. Thanks for the well wishes, people. If it gets worse, I will need to go to the hospital for my usual 3 day stint. So, if I drop off the thread, that would be why.

I also have a box of Homer’s Cinnamon Donut Cereal, but mine is unopened. I actually bought it in Florida, then dragged it home to Quebec on the bus a few years ago. Don’t think I will ever open it…well hell, never say never I guess!

I would like to start a blog myself. For now, I have been posting stuff on Facebook for people to read. I don’t know what blog sites to use. Are they free?

Teddy Ray there is a candy store near where i work that sells lucky charms marshmallows by themselves, no cereal involved to taint its sugary goodness. I almost bought it one day, just so i could make everything I ate “magically delicious” Also, I dont know who mentioned it, but the pepperjack doritos were my favorite, and since they are gone, the blazin buffalo and blue cheese ones have taken their place.

Now, I want to buy a plastic bear full of honey, some food coloring, and make my own ooze.

First and foremost, I’m writing this while opening Major Bludd from the new G.I. Joes and listening to music from the old Photon Arena from the 80’s my cousin went to. So 80s!!

Anyhow, for all you Wii-ners:
I stood around in line last night Wal-Mart (in a town so small I was the first person, and the others didn’t sell out the supply till 9:00 this morning) and got Wii Fit. Check my blog for a full review of it. I stress the need for reading my review not cause I make money off the site (I don’t), but because you need a review from someone who isn’t an idiot or musclehead. I’m about as ordinary as it gets, so I might be able to sum it up for the “norms”.

So, I have a collection of Spider-Man stuff, lots of which I’ve had since I was a kid. I loved Spider-Man and just never outgrew it (even have a Spidy tattoo). Anyways, I recently cleaned out the garage and found a bunch of stuff. My friend was helping me and he thinks I should sell some of it and make some money. I can’t bring myself to sell any of it yet. I don’t know if I’ll have kids and what if I have a girl and she’s not a tomboy like me and won’t care for my Spider-Man crap. I know I can’t take it with me when I die, but I think I want to hold onto it and wait to see if I have kids. If not then at least until I’m old and the money from the sale can help pay for someone to diaper my geriatric self.

Just wondering opinions on whether I should sell some stuff or wait? Remember those balls you sat on with handles that you bounced around on? I have a Spider-Man one of those circa 1978. Geez! Wonder how much that would be worth?!

1. Look it up on eBay. It might be the least sentimental item is worth a ton. It’s hard to say “Farewell Spidey” to one item, but it’s made easier if its “Hello Plasma TV”. I exaggerate, but you get the idea.

2. Post a pic of the collection on your blog so I can take a look. I think the size, condition and uniqueness of the items would help give a more solid answer.

TCC: I will post a collection of pics. I think I’ll take them this weekend so, everyone could get an idea of what I have. It’s just hard to let go after practically collecting a lifetime worth. People suggested I sell stuff when the movie came out, but it’s sooo hard to let go.

Leigha that sounds wonderful…imagine, adding magical deliciousness to any cereal you choose…ah, bliss…

As for blogs, I’ve got one on my myspace (click my name if you care) and I don’t do it for the comments, I just blog when I want to talk about something…people read it, I HOPE they like it…it makes ME laugh…

I don’t generally go in for self-promotion, but I do like this site, and I thought, as a freebie, y’all might enjoy my ‘zine, featuring intricate dicussions of the Snorks, Big Wheels, the E.T. video game, et al…

And Matt, dude, I could not be more pissed off that you got around to reviewing Choose Your Own Adventure Books and Pudding Pops before I did. I feel like such a failure now…

Just as a side note, I just got back from a conversation with my mom and some how we got to talking about the honey ooze and that lead into a discussion about the TMNT Pies. Now, I never had one because I don’t like that kind of thing but surprisingly, my mom has had them and without a single word out of me she mentions their “green filling.” So I had her get online and told her to go here and look up the post showing the white pudding going into the pie and she still insisted it was wrong and she clearly remembers it being green pudding. My mom of all people is among the green pudding believers club.

TCC, because he asked and anyone else who may be interested: I posted earlier about my Spiderman collection and my questioning whether I should sell any of it or not. Well, I posted a small portion of what I have. I’ll post more on the weekend.

TCC, I usually just post when the mood strikes me (which seems to be once every few weeks or so). People don’t comment much, but I think it’s because I tend to write really long posts and my words are not typically accompanied by shiny pictures to look at. Also, I write about really geeky nerdy shit like Disney Channel bumpers from 20 years ago. That kind of stuff is probably beyond most people’s “nerd” tolerance. XD

Doho: Your correspondence with the food company is hysterical. Also, count me among the sad victims of rose-tinted glasses, or in this case, green-tinted: For a while, I remembered the pie filling being green. I still get e-mails to this effect, and people seem so passionate about it that I’m still not totally sure it wasn’t released both ways.

I know what you mean Matt. I was ABSOLUTELY CONVINCED for the longest time, that the filling was green. In fact I don’t know if it’s been PROVEN that it wasn’t green.

I have a question about the blogging on MySpace. Are you allowed to post photos on the blog page? I was looking through the MySpace For Dummies book and it said nothing in the blog section about posting photos. If that’s the case, I may have to get a new blog site if I want to write something that I also want to post images. I mean, I got to have proof about what I’m talking about, aren’t I? Of course, when it comes to downloading videos, posting photos, or putting images on a webpage I am LITERALLY computer illiterate. I want to learn, but I don’t always have the time to put the effort into it, and I know my MySpace page can use a HUGE facelift! Also, I am one of the most impatient people, not being able to sit for so long to work on the computer. Of course, if it’s something I love, I wouldn’t mind the time it took to get the job done. Otherwise it’s “I want to rush and finish this so I can get it over with!” type of attitude.

Anyway, I was going through my old Nintendo Roms today and I got myself hooked on the old game, “Bugs Bunny’s Birthday Bash.” I started playing it in the morning, and then played a while during lunch and played a little tonight before I quit. Man, that game was addicting! Got up to the third part of Level 2. Well, they have this bonus game at the end of each level where you can win free lives and if you collected ten carrots during the round. I ended winning over 50 lives (or in the case of this game, 50 Bugs Bunnies) and after losing about half of them on most of the upper levels, I decided to call it quits! Fun game definetly, and I can see myself playing it all through my holiday weekend. Of course I won’t since I have plans over the weekend. Oh yeah, and another fun game I play quite a bit is M.C. Kids which is really just a plug-in for McDonalds but it really is a fun game! Anyway, that’s all for me for now!

BJ- yes you can. Just upload a pic to a site (Like photobucket etc) and paste the html code where you want the pic to be. if it does not let you paste, there is a thing you can click right on the blog post page, I think it says “if you cannot input click here”

Has anyone ever tried contacting Hostess so they can settle this green filling debate, because I think it’s about 50/50 on people who remember it being green sometimes (like me), with the other half thinking that the other side is nuts.

I couldn’t find any proof of it though today. The closest I could find is that the wiki article on Ninja Turtles food tie-ins menti