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01/23/2008: Tonight…on Unsolved Mysteries.

The reason I brought up Unsolved Mysteries in the last thread? Some kind folks got me a few of the swank topic-specific DVD sets for Christmas, and I've been watching them nonstop. I absolutely loved the show as a child, being simultaneously engrossed and petrified of every single episode from the tip of Robert Stack's opening monologue until the end credits.

That creepiness has remained familiar. When I watch the show now, I'm obviously not scared of the stories (and truth be told, time hasn't been kind to many of them, which now seem so obviously fabricated that I'm surprised I bought them even as a child), but the overall mood and tone of the series still manages to make me a little unsettled. Granted, that's half due to creating the right set of circumstances — pitch black, late night viewings — but I really can't think of a single movie (let alone another television show) that'd have me suspiciously eyeing every corner, window and mirror in our apartment. Hell, I'm in my late twenties, and Unsolved Mysteries still persuades me to keep a light on at bedtime. Either I'm a big baby, or the show was timelessly effective.

The two DVD sets I own are compilations of random UFO and ghost stories. Combine that with the various cryptozoology episodes that I've yet to pick up on DVD, and you've got the holy trinity of Unsolved Mysteries theme episodes. Whenever the show delved into any of those three topics, I was beyond stoked.

The UFO stories are great, because for every well-known story about human interaction with aliens (Area 51 and so forth), there are a dozen more that are so goofy and unbelievable that no skeptic would ever touch them. The beauty of it is, while the show maintained a neutral POV on whatever was impossible to prove, it never took a condescending tone: Every story was treated like it could've been true, and the eerie reenactments for even the stupidest made-up tales were just as effortful as the "true crime" stories that Unsolved Mysteries tackled more often.

So, no matter what the freaks on the show claimed, the production team was ready to film stunningly creepy dramatizations for it. I'm talking about everything from simple saucer sightings to a tiny-sized UFO that flew into a woman's bedroom at night and beamed cancer-curing lights at her head. They never skimped. Even when the stories called for them to create realistic alien costumes and have little midgets prance around someone's backyard, they totally did it.

The show did an amazing job of making even the most innocuous UFO story look like the creepiest shit ever, but those stories never came close to the ultimate Unsolved Mysteries horror: The ghastly ghost tales. My God. The reenacted (a loose term, but yeah) scenes of random, shapeless spectres turning up all over the place firmly altered my childhood brain to believe that such events could and probably would happen to me at any given moment. To this day, I have Robert Stack to thank for making every reflective surface, glass pane and creaking stairwell seem like my personal doorway to Hell.

The funny thing is, most of the ghost stories are obviously made up. Most of the segments featured interviews with the people claiming to have been haunted, and 90% of the time, they're the kind of folks who you'd actively avoid shopping next to in supermarkets. It's tough to believe that ghosts universally chose freaks and trashy failures to annoy, but smartly, the show never treated the obvious suspects as probable liars: If you had a story to tell, your word was as good as gold.

Course, I'd be remiss not to mention the true reason for the show's unending creepiness: Its incredible instrumental theme, which manages to be iPod-worthy while sending shivers down every bone in my body at the same time. Hearing that song is like doing the stupid Bloody Mary trick in a mirror: You know you're being ridiculous, but you still achieve an instantaneous notion that something bad is watching you. This doesn't sound like something to strive for, but I kinda dig it.

Of course, Robert Stack himself had more than a small part in the overall vibe of the series, combining his boomingly eerie inflections with the innate ability to make trenchcoats look fashionable even when he was being filmed in warm climates. Though my original kinship with him had more to do with knowing that he voiced Ultra Magnus in Transformers: The Movie, today, it's Unsolved Mysteries that will drive me to steal a handshake from him before God kicks me out of heaven because of the time I stole three packs of 1991 Upper Deck baseball cards from the local ice cream parlor.

There's a definite nostalgic appeal to the series; so much so that I can't firmly recommend it to people who didn't know what Unsolved Mysteries was until reading this entry. Still, if you remember pulling the sheets up a little higher every time Robert Stack intro'd a story about a semitransparent goblin who terrorized a children's hospital, grab a DVD set and keep a Friday night open. A+! The series is rumored to be making a comeback later in the year, but I doubt it'll manage to achieve the same aura of fright that the original run so effortlessly tormented me with.

RANDOM X-E ARTICLES FROM AGES PAST:
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In totally unrelated news, Waiterbot has reviewed Cloverfield. Don't click if you don't want spoilers, and please limit all Clover discussions to the original thread. What an amazingly tight ship we run.

I haven't seen "Unsolved Mysteries" in ages - but I think I know what is about to go to the top of my Netflix queue…

I remember when the DVDs were first released and I had the UFOs and Ghost Stories sets preordered. I barely remembered the show from when I was younger, but I had seen reruns and fell in love with it as the show was entering its final years.

I've also got the Strange Legends set and that one is really good - highly recommended. I got the Bizarre Murders one as well (found it used for $10), but it's almost a bit too depressing. It's interesting, but it's the paranormal themed episodes that are the best.

And I've seen the rumors too that HBO may plan to bring the show back this year, but it'll never be as good as it was. Robert Stack was perfect as the host. (I had a teacher once and after loaning him the sets, he remarked that he wished Stack could narrate his life - Stack could turn the most mundane story and with his voice make it sound terrifying.) If it comes back though, I've read that they may update on older stories, which would be interesting to see, so I'd probably still watch it.

I remember one episode where a ghost was spinning a glass at a bar and when it turned around it had the scariest face. That pretty much insured the fifth grade was sleepless.
Matt, did the dvd have that one?

When I was a kid, my babysitter and her family were on Unsolved Mysteries because her father was kidnapped. The weird thing is that I would see that man every time I went to their house and then one day he was just gone.

A few years back I caught an episode of U.M. on Lifetime and it happened to be that particular episode. Creepy coincidence?

But yeah, the theme songs to Unsolved Mysteries, Perry Mason, and most of all Tales from the Darkside made me run screaming from the room when I was little.

Click on the 1 and 2 buttons on the Game Gear in that random Howard Johnson article from ages past for some hot pornography.

oh wow. i was only a few years old when unsolved mysteries was on but weirdly enough i loved that show. it freaked my sister out to no end, but i loved watching it with my parents. maybe that's why i'm somewhat immune to "scary" movies today….

Man, I used to love that show. The theme song struck the same fear in me. The ones that freaked me out the most were the revolutionary ghost in the tavern and the haunted bunk bed. I liked them almost as much as the attic episode in the real ghostbusters cartoon.

That goddamn show had me terrified of aliens for years. To this day I'm still a little freaked out sleeping underneath a window. It's why I started going to bed with the TV or music on. I figured the aliens wouldn't bug me if there was shit happening in my room. They'd think I was still awake or something.

I don't really remember watching this much. Mainly, it was an excuse for me to change the channel. I think I got creeped out too easily.

Bill: I don't think I've come across that one yet, but it could be on there: There are a few discs that I keep shutting off before they wrap up. Maybe I'll find out tonight. Shivers.

So far, the eeriest ghost story was about this random family being tormented by spirits who: Caused the kids to get sick, caused radios to fritz, played practical jokes with paint brushes and inspired visions of fires, evil witches and flying specters. The ghosts on Unsolved Mysteries were usually pretty apathetic, but these were downright mean. It also featured the unspoken law of any good Unsolved Mysteries ep: It was shot in a perfectly normal suburban house that could've been any of ours.

Evin: Meeee tooo. I haven't come across it on the DVDs yet, but there was one throwaway shot of a green alien standing outside a little girl's window, just silently watching her sleep. (I think the ep had to do with aliens choosing certain people for repeat visitations.) Fucking freaky shot that's stuck with me for all these years.

When I was little I was deathly afraid of aliens because of unsolved mysteries. i would hide behind and under things like furniture so that the aliens couldnt see me from their planets. UGH i can still remember flying up the stairs of our first house because I thought I saw an alien, but it was my little sister…that bitch. other than that, i really loved unsolved mysteries. also, one of my parent's best friends is named robert stack. great stuff.

The first scary thing I remember was the Unabomber leaving a package bomb on someone's doorstep. Later came Gelertner's gnarled hand.

The green alien didn't scare me much, probably because I saw the episode in the summer when it wasn't yet dark at the 8pm hour.

AHHH MATT - This show and this show alone was totally responsible for the ulcer I had in childhood. Scared the shit outta me and I couldn't get enough!

In other news, MY REVIEW OF 'CLOVERFIELD' WAS PUBLISHED ONLINE. My first online article! Click to see (IF I did the link right, that is) I am so so excited. If Heath Ledger hadn't died, this would be a great day.

My Unsolved Mysteries memories are much the same. The show did have the capacity to spook me out from time to time when I was a child, but I still loved it nonetheless, particularly the UFO ones.

…it's Unsolved Mysteries that will drive me to steal a handshake from him before God kicks me out of heaven because of the time I stole three packs of 1991 Upper Deck baseball cards from the local ice cream parlor.

Muppet Baby
Congrats on getting your review published! And a well done review it was! Great job!

I remember this being one of the creepiest things on television when I was a kid, which was exactly why I loved it so much. It was funny though how it was alternately scary as hell and ridiculously full of complete bullcrap, depending on the episode. Robert Stack's voice and demeanor alone made it worth it.

The scariest episode I ever saw was about the urban myth about the girl in the white dress that's hitchiking at night. When you pick her up, she sits in the backseat quietly and just tells you where she wants to go. When you arrive at the destination, you turn around and she's disappeared. There's loads of versions of this with various reasons why she's hitchiking and where she's trying to go, but the basic gist of it's the same. The one I've heard the most was that she had died on that street on the way to the prom in a car accident while wearing her prom dress. She spends the rest of eternity walking up and down that street, trying to catch a ride to get to her prom, but of course she never makes it. At around the same time I saw that episode, my cousin told me a version of it saying that there was a certain street in our neighborhood where you could spot her if you went at a certain time of night.

Because of his story and that episode implanted on my 8 year old brain, to this day if I see a girl with a white dress ever hitchiking at night, I'm hitting the gas and not looking back.

I've never seen nor got into Unsolved Mysteries, but I'm young, so what the hell, I'll agree that this was a great blog and you're really on a roll.

For cheesy 80s Parody Theme goodness, I suggest the opening to Garth Marenghi's DarkPlace, the show that was once on Sci-Fi Channel that has now found a home at [adult swim] at 1am on Sundays.

DJ D
I think that story originally started in Chicago. The ghost is a woman who was killed by a jealous boyfriend during prohibition on her way home from a dance club/gin joint and the place she has people take her to is the cemetery where she is buried. I saw it on one of the "Haunted America" shows on the Travel Channel or something like that.

Nah, just messing. I'd be lying if I said I never stole anything. (Pack of gum from Home Depot when I was six or so. It was next to a bunch of doorknobs, so it might not have been actual theft… but I felt guilty.)

ANYWHO, Unsolved Mysteries is a teeny tad bit before my time, but my little sister and I used to be big fans of Fact or Fiction. In this show, they would take two or three supernatural stories, reenact them, and then let you think about whether somebody made this up themselves or if the writers did. Either way, they were very entertaining and very spooky, fabricated or not.

Dan H, Thanks loads. I know there have been loads of versions of it floating around for decades but had no idea where it could have started. I wonder where a lot of urban legends start, cause it's like everybody knows somebody who knows somebody who knows somebody who has a cousin or something somewhere who swears it happened to them.

Unsolved Mysteries is a major influence on the things I write for school. And the Robert's voice makes me cry and hide under my bed.

Ben, Didn't Jonathan Frakes (Commmander Ryker) host that? I think I remember that.

While we're 'fessing up, I used to steal packs of baseball cards from the grocery store when I was in middle school, and then sell them individually at recess. Had a nice little racket going. For some reason, at the time I was hung up on Bo Jackson, and made it my mission to own every Bo Jackson card ever made. I was your go-to Bo Jackson guy. I had a little slap bracelet racket happening on the side too.

Anyone else remember a show way back when called P.M. Magazine? It was kind of a magazine anthology show with segments that ran the gamut of just about anything you could thing of. It was hosted by two people, and I think one of them was the same guy that used to host Double Dare back in the day (Man, I used to love me some Double Dare). Anyways, there was one episode of P.M. Magazine that I used to love that was about werewolves. It was a real investigative piece where they tracked down people who studied the history of werewolves and interviewed a scientist who swore he saw someone actually transform into one right in front of his eyes. It was probably complete b.s., but at the time I SO wanted to believe it.

*Wiki's*
"It was hosted by James Brolin and later by Jonathan Frakes. The show was narrated by Don LaFontaine (from 1997-2000) and Campbell Lane (2002)."

Unsolved Mysteries… on DVD??? I think I have finally found a use for my Amazon gift certificates.

The ghost/UFO/Bigfoot stories were my favorites as well. Great freaky stuff. I will never forget one night I was watching the show with either my brother or a friend. It was a show about ghosts. I seem to remember a tale of a ghost leaving wet footprints around a swimming pool and other creepy stuff. At some point during the show, a picture fell off the wall of my room and crashed on the floor. Scared the shit out of us. I am pretty sure we ended up sleeping with all the lights on that night.

I went on a tour of NY just before Christmas and the tour guide said that the Clark mansion in Brooklyn is haunted by the family servants. The story goes, the house was one of the first ever to have an elevator. Shortly after being built the family went on a trip. When they returned 3 weeks later they found the servants all trapped in the elevator dead. The elevator was removed and later the mansion was turned into apartments. To this day tenants claim they can hear screams coming from behind the walls where the elevator shaft is hidden.

Matt and Evin, I'm with both of you. I still get creeped out every time I see a picture of an alien just because of Unsolved Mysteries, and I do believe I was in the 2nd or 3rd grade the last time I saw an episode.

Waiterbot's back!??! Matt, you're the best! I was having total Advent withdrawl!

Well, I'm not sure I've ever seen Unsolved Mysteries (bad memory, you see), but I do recall loving a show that might or might not have been called Amazing Stories that had stories about ghosts that were only slightly creepy, but more just entertaining. You know the ones, like where a dead family dog leads a car out of the fog, etc. Another creepy show I watched once in a while was Are You Afraid of the Dark? - it always started with kids around a campfire telling stories, then would cut to a reenactment of the story that was being told. These were ridiculous stories mind you, like some kid who was obsessed with pin ball being stuck forever inside a mall with a giant pin ball chasing him. Seriously.

More recently (like five years ago), I saw a show called A Haunting in Connecticut that scared the shit out of me. I think most of it had to do with the excellent plot structure (this kid slowly goes totally insane and homicidal - even though his cancer is going into remission - as he locks himself up in the basement while satanic voices talk to him), the interviewing of the people that it actually happened to, the fucking freaky image of the goddamn DEVIL that was included, and the good ol' fashioned haunted-house-ness of it. Did I mention that I watched it by myself at 1 o'clock in the morning? Oh yeah, and the house had been a funeral home and had a poltergeist that attacked and tried to kill people, even if they weren't actually inside the house (the father's car tried to kill him at his work). It included exorcisms and everything.

On a slightly different note, one of my all time favourite books has always been the Reader's Digest Strange Stories, Amazing Facts book. It has ghost stories, stories about eccentric people, fun facts that you didn't know, and mysteries (although some of them are outdated; for example, the book asks 'Did a Black Hole Crash in Siberia?' when they now know that it was an asteroid that exploded before it landed or something like that). It's pretty much a perfect book, though, and I reread it about once every year and a half.

Argh, I hate double posting, but I forgot to add that I love the unhappy-looking ghosts beside the 'Posted by' on here.

Also, the only thing to ever scare me for more than one night was an episode of When Animals Attack that I saw on my seventh birthday that featured a little girl having her face ripped off by a cougar. I spent a year in absolute terror, convinced that a cougar was goign to jump through my window and kill me. Often when I closed my eyes, I thought I could actually feel its breath on my neck, and that if I opened my eyes I would be dead in seconds. Strangely enough, I spent a lot of daytime hours researching cougars and was totally fascinated by them.

Note: Please tell me if I have told this story already. I am senile at age 19, and can't remember who I've told what.

Such a good show. If they do remake it, they need to get Christopher Walken to host.

There was one episode about the Shroud of Turin that scared the shit out of me when I was around 13 years old. I am not exaggerating - to this day I cannot see a picture of the Shroud without needing a diaper!

I also remember digging into Halloween booty with my best friend and watching the Halloween episodes.

Ah, yes. The timeless creepiness of Unsolved Mysteries. I remember one night I had a friend over for a sleepover and we were in the middle of watching Unsolved Mysteries late at night when we heard a distinct "tap, tap, tap" on the sliding glass door (the curtains were closed, of course). Well, we totally freaked out and ran up to my room and barricaded ourselves in, and gathered "weapons" so we could go investigate. I believe I had a can of Lysol, my sister had my table-top easel and my friend had my flute case. We went down to see what could possibly be out there only to find nothing. It turns out my friend's mother wanted to tell her something, but didn't want to call our house that late at night, so she came over and went around the back of the house and tapped on the door to try to get our attention. I still don't know why that woman thought that would be a good idea.

The only show on tv now that you can even compare to Unsolved Mysteries is A Haunting. Still, I remember being 7 or 8, sitting in the basement watching this on tv. It was always a lot of fun to see how fast you could turn off the tv and haul ass upstairs to safety.

You're right JR, I never checked those. One of them leads to one of my favorite articles.

there was one throwaway shot of a green alien standing outside a little girl's window, just silently watching her sleep.

If it's the shot I'm thinking of, then it's the one alien shot from UM that really freaked me out. It was of a thin alien standing still just outside of a bedroom window, watching someone sleep, while illuminated only by what seemed to be a full moon. I remember some bushes outside and the alien could've possibly been standing towards the camera right side of the window. Anyway, if that's the same shot you're referring to, then it also totally fucked with me as a kid.

The one ghost shot that really got to me was when they were covering a haunting by colonial era ghosts in an old two story house. I remember the reenactment showing the victim walking out of his house, straight out the front door, and turning back around to see someone watching him from the second floor window. As soon as the victim turned around, the ghost (in my memory looking quite like George Washington) let go of the curtains that he was pushing aside and slowly walked away from the window.

Around 2003 or so, these DVDs were out, and I was obsessed with paranormal stuff like Aliens and Ghosts. My local video-rental place had all the alien and ghost sets, and everytime we went I would rent a disc or two.

These things terrified me. Does anyone remember the one where in this house it's possesed by like demon ghosts, and one time a relative stayed there, but left in the middle of the night (Or early morning, can't remember XD) because he couldn't stand the loud tapping and stuff!

I also remember one about some haunted ship that is now a tourist attraction, the St. Mary or something. With footprints appearing around the swimming pool…

A very creepy show… On another note, I am already into the Halloween spirit WAY TOO EARLY. My Firefox theme has changed to Halloween, I watched Halloween 4 and 5 last weekend, and now this ghost/alien post…Can we expect a Halloween comeback this year Matt?

Can anyone remember this Unsolved Mysteries? Being a huge fan of the show, I watched every week. But one time, there was a ghost bit that scared me to death. I only ever saw it once, and have longed for it ever since. Sadly, it isn't on the dvd sets.

Heres how it goes: This family moves into a house, all is well, and then one day the little girl has to run upstairs to get her book bag for school. I guess she gets really freaked out over something and tears out the front door. Needless to say, after that they start to hear chains and whatnot moving around in the attic. They call in a spirit guide who says the place is haunted by a guy named Simon, and she draws a picture of what he looks like.

The family moves, and has a baby, and everything is back to normal. They start taking pictures of the new baby and have them developed. Upon going thru them, the very last picture isnt of the kid, its a side profile of a mans face…..identical to how this "Simon" guy apparently looked.

I love Waiterbot. Thanks.
I haven't even thought about Unsolved Mysteries for ever. Is it really coming back? Oh, and Perfect Strangers DVD is only 2 weeks away!

Ah yes, Unsolved Mysteries. There were only one or two episodes that really scared me. The rest of the time, I ate it up.

DJ D, I don't remember PM Magazine firsthand (I was either too little or not born yet). However, I ganked this clip from Youtube of one episode that talks about the QUBE system, which I'm pretty sure nobody's heard of. I think it dates back to like 1978. Pretty cool stuff.

That song will be in my head for the rest of the day now. If it's possible, how bout putting it in next years Halloween Countdown?
And did you ever get that book on lobsters? I bought it for you a few days after Christmas because I was strapped for cash, but wanted to contribute.

It always seemed after I watched a ghost episode my house magically became haunted…

It always seemed after I watched a ghost episode of Unsolved Mysteries my house magically became haunted…

Like Bill, my most vivid "Unsolved Mysteries" memory is of a haunted inn/bar, and one night a guy is closing up and walks downstairs to the bar, to see an apparition of a child/ghoul thing sitting on the bar, spinning a glass. When the ghoul thing becomes aware of the guy watching him, he spins around, to reveal a disfigured demon face, before jumping down from the bar, presumably to chase the guy. That scared the crap out of me as a kid (and still kind of gives me the willies today).

There was another episode that involved a family's house that was haunted by multiple ghosts (the ghosts are a family, too, if I remember right). The image that haunts me is one of the family members awoke one night to find her bed surrounded by the leering apparitions of this ghost family. She tore out of the house and outside, and looked up at her bedroom window to see all of the ghost faces glaring down at her.

There was yet another ghost episode (the ghost stories on Unsolved Mysteries were my favs) that involved an invisible witch thing that haunted a family's house; everyone that slept in the house would wake in the night screaming. The image that haunts me from that episode is a first-person view of the witch coming around a corner to stalk one of the kids.

But yeah - as goofy and unreliable as the stories were on Unsolved Mysteries, it was all about presentation. They could have you jumping out of your seat over the thinnest of premises.

After the thread went up, I did some Google searches and was surprised to find so many folks who remember the aforementioned "alien peering through little girl's window" scene.

I was also Youtubin' the shit out of Unsolved Mysteries last night, and suggest that all U.S. fans do the same. The DVDs feature slightly edited graphics packages, and though they're overall awesome, they can't compare to the buzzing purple transitions and pregame Stack-driven teasers of the original broadcasts. Holy hell. I love this show!

Unsolved Mysteries was my favorite television program as a child. Way better than even the cheesy-awesome "Are You Afraid of the Dark?". Robert Stack was responsible for many nights hugging the wall as I crept upstairs, afraid that around any corner an alien or serial rapist may grab me and drag me off into the night.

When I was in high school in the late-90s, my friend and I were babysitting for a neighor (a single woman named Pam with four kids and very, ahem, loose morals). We never saw a husband and she never mentioned having one.

One night, after the kids went to sleep, we were sitting on the couch watching Unsolved Mysteries and Pam appeared on the screen — being interviewed on the same couch my friend and i were sitting on! Pam was talking about how her husband was shot on the side of the road while fixing a flat tire, he managed to drive home and then died on the kitchen floor. His killer — as far as I know — is still on the loose.

That was the last babysitting job I did for Pam. Every time I hear the Unsolved Mysteries theme song, I think of her and that damn couch.

OMG MATT. The reason I keep writing fiction about the supernatural, insist on ghost hunting in abandoned sanitoriums and hospitals, and wish that my house was haunted is directly caused by that show. T_T Lifetime never shows it cuz Stack's doing unsolved mysteries in the afterlife.

In addition to that theme song, I also have the Goosebumps theme song stuck in my head. Man, those were both nice theme songs. XD

I used to watch this show every night it was on with my family. It seems prime-time television, back then for us, was all about the family. Nowadays, it's crime dramas and dumb CBS sitcoms. We only gather on Thursdays for NBC's lineup now. Or, used to, before the writer's strike.

Wow, was watching a couple of old Unsolved Mysteries episodes on Youtube just now, and I had forgotten just how creepy they were - in particular, one about a girl who was raised in a cult called the DeCloud Family… the creepy music and Robert's voice definitely added to the creepiness.

first, unsolved mysteries gave me the heebeejeebees when i was growing up, i still loved it regardless.

second, i just re-read the chocobliss commercial review for the five billionth time and find myself still wishing for one of those chocolate-colon cancer giving- cakes.

I just read the Choco-Bliss article at work and had to close my office door due to my very loud laughter

you HAD to talk about unsolved mysteries after so many of us gushed about it, huh?!

Actually- this article made me realize something.
I remember vividly the stories of serial killers and long-lost family members and stuff like that. I can remember being scared of being kidnapped.
But I couldn't explain my completely irrational fear of ghosts. I would refuse ( haa! and still do!) to be anywhere alone- from dancehalls to bathrooms, for fear that a GHOST would come and scare me. I hung hard to the idea that if I didn't BELIEVE in ghosts, I wouldn't see one- even though I did believe in them and would scream bloody murder if I saw one.
I can now safely say that all of these "Remember that one Ghost Episode?" reminiscings remind me that YES, I DO REMEMBER THAT EPISODE AND I HID IT AWAY IN MY BRAIN FOR A REASON.

So anywho, I decided to look at the linked articles from the past, and I looked at the He-Man coloring book one, and started crying…LITERALLY. when I was little my cousin russell and I would hang out at my grandma's house on weekends so that our parents could spend quality time with one another. That said, she had very few toys and one of the things she had was that exact coloring book. I skimmed through the article, and unfortunately that book was not ours, but I want to say thanks Matt for bringing back the joy of that coloring book from my four year old mind.

I forgot LaFontaine did VO work in the show. "In a world where there are mysteries….." (quick montage of aliens, Bigfoot, Amelia Erhardt, Mothman, Owen Wilson's nose) "and many of those are unsolved…." (words fly by the camera in random directions: Bermuda Triangle, Atlantis, Out Of Body Experiences, Raven Symone's Career) "Only one man had the guts and snappy trenchcoat to bring them out into the harsh light of scrutiny to bring peace to a troubled viewing public…." (shot of Robert Stack from the recording sessions of "Beavis and Butthead Do America," ordering cavity searches) "This year, bring the experience home with the Unsolved Mysteries Do-It-Yourself Kit. Includes one random Alien Mask, coil of rope, bucket of goo, Fake ID papers, and one packet of Instant Chupacabra. Be the first on your block to make it on TV without being there to enjoy it. From X-E Industries, a subsidiary of Mainway Enterprises."

Leigha beat me to it, but everyone should really go back and read the he-man coloring book article. Even though I think I had read it more than once before it still had me laughing. That and the review of that old 90210 book might be two of the funniest things reviewed. I hope Matt finds some great garage sales with more of these things because his commentary on random kid's "coloring" ability is priceless.

And for those who have admitted stealing or shoplifting I can only disapprovingly shake my head at you because I never did such a thing (I forced my younger brother to do it but technically I never did)

While I never watched Unsolved Mysteries when I was a kid, I was a HUGE fan of the William Shatner hosted "Rescue 911", which also did dramatizations. My favorite ones always involved an animal either being rescued, or the animal participating in the rescuiing itself.

Man I loved this show, And Rescue 911.
Havent seen either of them since their original run, Im going to have to pick up some of the DVD's, anybody know if Rescue 911 is on DVD too?

Matt: Is there still an rss feed for X-E or is that down now?
Im having problems with my IE so that could be it.

I never stole anything from a store but I have walked right into a music store and took the CD I wanted and passed that CD around to thousands of strangers. At least that what I was told I did. I haven't done that in a while.

OMGZ i used to be SO SCARED of Unsolved Mysteries!!! my mom used to watch it, and just hearing the theme song would make me nervous………….i watch it now, and i'm like "well hellooooooooooooo awful dramatic re-enactments!!"

Unsolved Mysteries was pretty great. That theme song will forever haunt anyone who was a kid during that show's initial run. All the memories you guys have… pretty spot on for me as well.

It is a shame we never got an Unsolved Mysteries/Ripley's Believe it or Not combo program starring both Robert Stack and Jack Palance. I don't think I would have gotten any sleep as a kid.

Someone should call Unsolved Mysteries old phone number. It's probably a dating line or something now.

Matt
You should figure out a way to remove the red bar from the woman's tits on the main page.

Called it. It is still active but only for tips. Is Unsolved Mysteries still on the air? I thought Robert Stack died?

"Right, we're here. Switch on the paralyzing white light so we can open the window and grab it."

"Okay, let's…hang on, sounds like the stereo's on. Should we…should we come back later?"

"We've crossed trillions and trillions of miles of empty desolate vacuum, perverting several laws of nature in the process, for the sole purpose of abducting this Earth monkey and performing horrible medical experiments on it. And you're asking if we should just turn around and go home."

I'll admit, hearing the theme song still scares me today. Remembering when I was a kid, listening to the song in my parent's living room as I try to sleep in a dark room. So creepy…

I agree 100% about the music on that show. I always loved the intro - especially that shot of the cop car racing over the hill … It's like: When stuff was that fucked up, what good would the cops be?

I once saw Robert Stack on Letterman doing a parody of Unsovled Mysteries - complete with trenchcoat and spooky music:

"Tonight on Unsolved Mysteries … A town so remote … it doesn't have a Starbucks, or a GAP store in it."

And, completely off-topic and in no way trying to derail the conversation here, I put all my Nintendo codes together; all you other X-E gamers can check my name for codes and such….let's leave it over there, please

Back to topic: I saw that freaky alien pick today and I nearly shit my pants. I think I repressed it, but it now explains my "aliens outside windows especially with mini-blinds" fear comes from….

Guess who dodged out of work for 30 mins to pick up the "Bizarre Murders" U.S. DVD set this afternoon? Yay!

The one with the Queen Mary and the haunted bunk beds is still with me even though I have only seen it once.

hmm…I just saw a commercial for DS Advance Wars: Days of Ruin and it had a UGO.com review along with it. I haven't seen a UGO plug on a commercial before. Matt, do you still do work for them?

Bill: The site is still with UGO, yes, and I occasionally do some freelance work for 'em.

Is a picture of the infamous "alien outside the window" picture online somewhere? I am curious to see if I remember it. I didn't find it on a quick Google search.

Great to see waiterbot back, I want to see Advent characters throughout the year. Easter special, please do an Easter special?

I agree that Unsolved Mysteries was always scary, yes, I know the UFO stories were not believable, but at my young age they were scary.

I used to watch that show all the time, but the only episode I specifically remember is the alien looking in the window mentioned above. Something about that one freaked me out for some reason. I also seem to recall one about a man walking into the middle of a field on his farm and vanishing right in front of his family. I could be wrong on that one, but I am pretty sure that one was on there too.

Also, does anyone else remember this Unsolved Mysteries parody from Amazon Women on the Moon:

OH MAN, did I LOVE this show when it was first on. Still do. And yes the theme song REALLY creeped me out too. This show freaked me out when I was a kid. Of course Robert Stacks narration made the show even creepier then it already was.

I don't have many memories of this show, because the opening alone was plenty enough to freak me right the hell out. Reading all the descriptions confirms I was way too much of a puss for it. I'll definitely have to check out some YouTube episodes now though, sounds awesome.

squee4242 I would reccomend you check out some videos of the show as soon as you can. You won't regret it. =) Oh , and the opening will get stuck in your head, if it is'nt already stuck.

Frakkyfire, Yeah, I used to love Amazing Stories too. A few years ago, the Sci-Fi channel started reruning those. I wish they were still on.

Annette, PM Magazine didn't last very long and wasn't a huge hit, but I remember a handful of episodes. So, what the heck is a QUBE system anyway?

Unsolved Mysteries scared the crap out of me as a six-year-old, yet I still watched a whole bunch of episodes. Yeah, the ghosts, aliens, paranormal episodes were always my favourites too. They scared the crap out of me but I still watched them.

I haven't seen an episode of Unsolved Mysteries since they aired on Lifetime, and that was a while ago. I would love to see some episodes again.

Matt: So glad to hear you're enjoying your Christmas gift. I LOVED Unsolved Mysteries as a kid. Does this DVD have the story about the ghost who, when he was alive, his girlfriend had broken up with him or something and he went out to chop wood and accidentally chopped his own leg off? For some reason, that story has stuck with me all these years.

Reading Rescue 911's wiki article I noticed something mentioned at the very bottom of the page. A Rescue 911 pinball machine.

Looking through the list of other machines, I see a few more I wouldn't mind having.

Baywatch
Bride of Pinbot
Captain Fantastic
Gilligan's Island
Jack Bot
Johnny Mnemonic
Joust
Monopoly
Scared Stiff
Super Mario Bros
Tales from the Crypt
TMNT
T2
Viper (that show was fantastically sucktastic)

I used to play that Rescue 911 pinball game when I used to go to the arcade. I love pinball. In fact, whenever I went to the arcade I basically ignored the video games in favor of pinball or games that gave you tickets that you could cash out for a prize.

Terminator 2 judgement day rocked the pinball house. After spending all my money on Street Fighter II\Terminator 2 sessions I would occasionally hit the start button, just to hear it makes sounds. Same goes for Addams Family.

Another show that was a hoot to watch was ABC's run of Ripley's Believe It, Or Not! hosted by Jack Palance. You can believe one thing, nobody ever delivered a tag-line like Jack. Back in my youth, Paranormal goings-on and other shenanigans were vast and plenty across the land. We had movies, TV shows, paperbacks, newsletters, t-shirts, and even jewelry espousing UFOs, Pyramid Power, Bigfoot, Disco, Dowsing, Elvis Lives, Bruce Lee Lives, Hauntings and the Haunted, and many other otherworldy wonders. If anyone creates a working Time Machine anytime soon, I'm taking all X-E posters on a field trip to my childhood home of Oakland, California in the mid-70's. There was a neat UFO museum at Pier 39 that would be a good place to start.

A Tales from the Crypt pinball machine would be incredibly cool. I think one of the coolest I ever played was the Nightmare on Elm Street one, where Freddy's head would pop up and you had to try to shoot the ball into his mouth. It was worth it to hear him screaming one-liners at you from time to time. I remember being really good at skee-ball back in the day, but tried to play it recently and just sucked. I seem to remember there was a certain sweet spot you could hit with the ball along the side of the ramp that would cause it to bounce just right and go right into the center ring, but I couldn't do it now to save my life.

Jack Palance was so cool back then. Just kind of laid back, old as dirt, and a little creepy all at once. He was the best part of Ripley's Believe it Or Not. He always seemed like he was on the verge of just keeling over right then and there, but he'll probably live to be 400 years old or something. Wait, is he dead? I don't remember.

Ripley's Believe It or Not was good. I used to like the show That's Incredible back in the day too. Do they air reruns of either of those on any channels?

Real Stories of the Highway Patrol was neat to watch back when there weren't many police video clip shows.

nork I used to watch those late night but the day before the prime time viewings of Jeopardy as well. And then like a total nerd watch them the next day with people and amaze them with my skills of memorization.
What a nerd.

You calling me out, Tex? I may not have skee-ball prowess, but I got one word for you:

In first grade I was watching Unsolved Mysteries (some UFO theme episode) with my mom in the room. She was doing something else, but was half watching it. she looks at the reenactment of the UFO itself and goes "IS THAT A DIXIE CUP? IT LOOKS LIKE A DIXIE CUP!"

DJD: There was a "Tales from the Crypt" pinball machine. Here's a link with various pictures of it.

Too bad we couldn't get any banter about classic Unsolved Mysteries episodes going during Halloween season…Oddly enough, I was playing a heated game of Trivial Pursuit this past weekend and one of the questions asked what popular show from the 90s did Robert Stack host.

My hometown is a (stereo)typical british seaside resort, where the grey water gently laps the mud-sand. There are lots of chip shops and a street of amusement arcades (a lot less than a few years ago) leading up to one big amusement arcade on a pier.

During my youth, I was the only person in town it seems to ever play pinball. The thing is, I liked all the lights and noises and the selection: The Who's "Tommy", Addams Family, Tales from the Crypt, Star Trek: TNG, The Twilight Zone, Elvira and some very generic ones (including one with women who were almost

in the nip).

I played it for hours. I played until I ran out of money and had to beg my parental units or siblings for more money. I played it with intent. I played it badly too.

I played it based on knowing four things:
1) pull spring to play,
2) push buttons to whack with flippers,
3) ball makes things flash and whoop,
4) ball goes in hole is game over.

I never understood even a quarter of what was going on then, and I still don't now! I never for the life of me worked out what TILT did except lose me my ball.

But, I'll still play pinball every summer. I'll still suck at it. I'll still be stood there staring at flashing lights and mimicking the noises. I'll still beg my brother for more cash when I use up a whole weeks shopping money trying to get something to light up.

Matt, just in case it got missed can I ask again about make a suggestion. Is there any chance of offering a notification system for new posts?

I know Feedburner.com lets you set them up for free from the RSS feed and gives a bit of code as a form for readers to sign up to (might even have a Wordpress plugin), and then it handles the email notifications.

I tend to keep the previous posts open, so guess when there's a new post based on conversations running dry.

JLAJRC, Thanks a lot. That looks pretty sweet. I remember the Elvira one too. Man, I'd love to have one of those things.

Guise: …that pinball machine and I have good memories, such good memories.

DJ D, oh we just played around a bit. I knew how to press her buttons to make her give sweet noises. She was never satisfied though, always after extra balls…hm…pinball machines are such hussies.

Wow, Unsolved Mysteries. I haven't thought of that show in years, but instantly the theme music started playing in my head when I saw your post! I loved this show as a kid. I'm almost afraid to watch it now since it might ruin the awesome mystery that I remember. I attribute this show to why I still find myself watching UFO files, stupid ghost story shows, and Court TV. I think this show can claim to be the progenitor of all of the above….

Just an FYI—all of the "Unsolved Mysteries" DVD collections are available on NetFlix. So if you don't want to fork over $20 to watch B movie actors haunted by midgets in martian costumes you have an alternative!

There was a Tommy machine locally for a while, when the table was new. But not until it was gone, did I find out by holding a certain button at the beginning, could you "Play Blind" by making special shutters slide over the main flippers.

Matt, can you take the Christmas stuff down soon? It makes me a little sad every time I see it.

Almost all of the holiday decorations are off the site, except for the header graphic on the main page and the three caroling smileys at the top of the blog (under the advertisement).

DJ D, they weren't bad, but they were liable to wobble all over the place uncontrollably at times.

I'm at work for the next 3 hours, but I'll try to chime in for an FNT when I can. Anybody got a good topic? I want to know what became of that Chia Pet. Maybe we'll get lucky and Matt will stop by for a second.

Always, Old J

I'm pretty sure my Chia Bart's on his last legs (sprouts?) at the moment. I've managed to revive him a couple of times but he's looking pretty scraggly at this point. Think I've got to figure out some leakage issues before I try to plant anything again.
So staring at that screencap of the spooky Unsolved Mysteries logo long enough finally unfogged the memory that the mere sight of it was enough to send me rushing to change the channel in terror as a kid. Any fontophiles out there that can identify whether it's actually one I could use for hypothetical Halloween invitations?

Lest anyone be confused by my previous comment, I meant that I do not have what is known as a "green thumb", which is a term for someone who is good with plants… I'm sure just about everyone is familiar with the term, but just wanted to make sure.

Wanna hear something interesting related to Unsolved Mysteries? I saw an episode of it on Youtube that was about an "evil cult" called the DeCloud Family, that was supposed to be Branch Davidian-like, but without the big showdown with the FBI. Needless to say, I was intrigued, and Googled it. The only reference to it I could find was the very YouTube snippet I had just watched, as well as dozens of pages for family geneology of the last name "DeCloud". Hmmmmm…

Oh dude, i was suuuuuch a huge fan of Unsolved Mysteries when i was a kid, i would watch it every time it came on just about.It was almost along the lines of a show like The X-Files because of the way it portrayed everything in the reenactments, even the more mundane murder mysteries always had a touch of spooky lighting and dry ice where needed.I'm sure i was as huge a fan as you were/are, and that's pretty damn huge.And other than his role in the Beavis and Butthead movie, Unsolved Mysteries is easily Stack's best work bar none.Definitely gotta look out for those DVD's alright.

Unsolved Misteries!! I watched it when I was 8 (year: 1988), at saturday nights, after going with my mom and sister to the supermarket. We used to buy cookies and Philadelphia cheese (yeah! It's sold in Perú yet!!) and eat them while we were watching the show. It was really really scary for me. And It helped me with my first english lessons: "Unsolved Misteries"= "Misterios sin Resolver", "Missing Person" = "Persona Desaparecida", "Wanted" = "Buscado" etc etc.

mmm…FNT. Sounds like it should be a sandwich. I too would like a chia update. Cause I am too lazy to grow one myself.

Is that fish comma nuts? Or testicles of fish? Do fish have testicles? I'm gonna go do something productive.

Are you going to go find out if fish have testicles? Cause I'm not telling you what I meant until you find out if they do

I meant fish and nuts but I realized after I posted it I realized that it looked more like nuts of fish and became fond of the idea.

Man, stupid tinyurl site is blocked at work. I can't get to it. See, now I'm all curious. I never thought I would be this eager to find out whether or not fish have testicles. Guess I'll have to wait till I get home. Good thing I'm off in 10 minutes.

Totally off the subject, but I just saw something X-E'ish in the kitchen here at work–a box of crackers called Chicken in a Biskit. They're crackers. Not quite chicken flavored Doritos, but close. Anybody ever heard of this thing?

D'oh!
Sorry that last post was me,not DJ D. Guess I had a brain fart and put the wrong name in. Sorry DJ D I didn't even notice till just now.

My Chia tree has been dead and nasty since around Christmas; I should probably do something with it….

Well, I managed to do it. I managed to go this entire week without any Clover-spoilers, despite a scare a couple of days ago at work. I had to hum loudly and walk away from a conversation I almost heard too much of. So, nine hours from now I'll be sitting in the theatre having myself a good ole' Clover-time. Can't wait to join in on all the chat tomorrow night.

Hey, how come there's a question mark in my name up there? I didn't put that there! You can't go just putting unwanted punctuation in my name, especially when I'm joking around about it. That's not cool! I blame that cheeky looking ghost. I don't like the way he's looking at me.

First time I ever heard of Chicken in a Biskit was on Mystery Science Theater, as Pearl Forrester's favorite snack cracker. Now I gotta figure out which episode that was so I can watch it.
Good show on avoiding the spoilers, DJ! I've been looking forward to your contribution to the Clover thread.

DJ D: My grandma used to eat those Chicken in a Biskit things all the time. I found them vile and grotesque. I don't want to think about chicken when I'm eating crackers

I was never able to watch Unsolved Mysteries. I tried to watch it once or twice and got freaked out and changed the channel every time. That's really saying something, because I was a freaky kid who used to beg for ghost stories at bedtime and was obsessed with skeletons when I was as young as five. Scary movies have never scared me, ghost stories have never given me nightmares, but I could not watch that show for more than five minutes at a time. I consider this proof that Unsolved Mysteries is the creepiest thing that has ever existed.

You got that right! I didn't try one, but just the thought of it sounds pretty disgusting.

I don't know why I'm still up this late. I've gotta "be up" in 5 hours or so, but I can't sleep at all. It's this night schedule I'm on. These days I don't get to bed till 5:00am or so, and usually get up around noon, so I can be at work at 4:00pm or sometimes later. So, this is kind of like my evening I guess, when I should be eating dinner and watching TV before going to bed in a few hours. I don't mind though. I've always been much more of a night person anyway, so this fits. It just sucks that I'm only going to get 3 hours of sleep tonight so I can be up and at 'ems for Cloverfield in a few hours. I'm sure that'll keep me awake though. After the movie we're going to get some lunch and do some comic book shopping and then I gotta go back to work.

Hey, Shaunfu, nice looking site you got there. I just checked it out for the first time. Nice to see old school Starscream beating the piss out this new chicken legged shit. Good job!

The other day I finally got round to beating the new Transformers game based on the movie (not because it was particularly hard, I just didn't get round to it), and I got some cheat codes to make some of the old designs in the game resemble their G1 paint jobs. After using the cheat codes, you have 3 different Optimus's to choose from (the movie one and 2 G1 versions), you can play as G1 Megatron or movie Megatron, and you can give Starscream and Jazz their G1 paintjobs, which means they still have the shitty movie bodies, but they're painted correctly.

I'm such a sucker for franchise based games, and don't know when I'll ever learn my lesson. I actually asked for the Superman Returns game for Christmas 2 Christmas's ago. God, that was awful! But, for every few bad ones you get a good one, like the Batman Begins game. I don't know how much of that had to do with the fact that it actually was a great game and how much had to do with the fact that I'm just such a huge Batman fanatic that I would naturally be more forgiving. I haven't heard anything about a game based on The Dark Knight, but I'm sure it's only a matter of time. The Iron Man game looks promising though.

Going to be posting a new thread in a bit, but wanted to point your way to this guy's YouTube videos, featuring a ton of UFO-related clips from Unsolved Mysteries and other old television shows with similar themes. Great stuff. Some ridiculous, all fun.

I'm the same way. I think I've bought or at least rented every movie based game for any movie that I'm pumped for; I guess that's marketing at work. I never made it through the Transformers movie game, but I've seen pics of the G1 redos and it just didn't seem worth the effort in the long run. And like you, I like the idea of an Iron Man game, but remember: 1. it's another movie based game and 2. it's made by SEGA-not the greatest of track records of late.

We should find a way to be strong together in May and only buy it after we've rented it and tried it out. We could start an "impulse game buying" support group of sorts

Batman Begins the video game was the best concept for a Batman game to date. The problem was its linearity in that every room you walked into was scripted so precisely and the TAB style focusing with the L&R buttons ala Kotor made everything very obvious. The driving segments weren't any fun and the last level really fell apart. Too short and while I liked unlocking the classic Batman attires and thought they looked great, I didn't have interest to play through again.

Oh yeah, I've had Chicken in a Biskit before. They tasted okay until I looked at the ingredients list. Helloooo processed food.

Shaunfu, Good thinking. We should both rent it around the same time and compare notes and decide if it's worth a buy or not. We could have support group meetings… "Hello. My name is DJ D and I'm a franchise impulse game buyer. I guess it all started back when I was a kid and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was so popular. I didn't think anything about it at the time. A little Spider-Man here, a little Transformers there. It wasn't until I sat down and spent 45 minutes of my life defeating a tornado as a boss battle in Superman Returns that I realized that I might have a problem. Now I've hit rock bottom. I feel so ashamed that I've let it get this far. I really thought I was in control."

dohopki, Yeah, if I had one complaint about Batman Begins it's that in some parts it practically played itself. I wish I could have had the option to use the batarang and other contraptions whenever I wanted to, and not when I was prompted to. At times I thought it was a tad too easy and would have liked a little more of a challenge, especially in the final boss battle, but otherwise I thought it was loads of fun, and I especially like the way they cut scenes from the movie into game play. That was really cool. And yeah, I agree, Iron Man looks great. I just hope I'm not let down again.

Get a good Iron Man movie out first, then we'll discuss the game. Speaking of, JoshC if you're out there, did you ever pick up Mario Kart DS?

Hey dohop. Not yet, it wasnt in stock but I ordered it with Advance Wars. should be in next week(hopefully.)

Gonna go on youtube I guess to find some unsolved mysteries now…I may have accidentally OD'ed on extra strength tylenol rapid release gels this morning….your supposed to have only 8 in 24 hours…i think i may have had 10 or 12…i dunno…I'm trying to find a good ear nose throat doc to help me out…I got mad sinus polyps I was told. Oh yeah…chicken in a biskit crackers are awesome! those and these others that were swiss cheese flavor and shaped like pieces of swiss cheese. I got Endless Ocean for the Wii on Tuesday…its really awesome and relaxing and only 30 bucks…plus you can swim with a friend via wifi and scuba dive together. Happy SNT!!!

Dan H I don't know about this SNT (it's getting a little late) but it is something that at least a few of us are interested in doing. The problem is none of us have the same games.

well when Super Smash Brothers brawl comes out…we all have to have an X-E Saturday Night Brawl tournament….

I also have Metriod Prime Hunters but no one else seems to and I've never played it competitively.

Ooh, I'll actually have WiFi going by the time Smash Brothers comes out. Count me in!

That show used to scare the SH*T out of me. The composite sketches were always the scariest.

I swear that dude never blinked, before he died we were already calling him the dead guy.

Wow, I remember that. As well as Sightings. I was kinda into both around Primary 4 to Primary 6, and admittingly they do send shivers down my spine.

And don't worry, Matt. You're not the only one sleeping with a night light. I had my room's lights (two large fluorescent tubes) on the whole night for two weeks after watching The Ring, and well, I now sleep with a night light too.

1-Back in the 80's my Elementary School Librarian was an actress on that show. I was in awe because it was my FAVORITE show and I never missed it.

there was an unsolved mysteries about a haunted house and some guy was sleeping on the floor in one of the haunted rooms like staying guard and this green mist hovers over him and he hears a voice say 'youre dead' and he screams and screams and screams and that was the scariest thing i had seen until that miniseries 'intruders' came on starring mare winningham and that lady was abducted by aliens who were posing as utility workers who were outside her house working on a phone pole and then all of a sudden just stared up at her and then walked through the walls.

I never missed Unsolved Mysterys i guess i was a bit more gullible to belive that all the storys where true though? the one that sticks out in my mind the most is about the father and son who where out hunting in the woods and where abducted by aliens and when they where returned apparently had been made more musculer hairy chested and with bigger penises! sinse then i still look up to the sky hoping that ship will find ME!

As i read further the story about the girl being seen by motorists her name is resserection mary if i recall correctly oh and chicken in a biscuit
MMMM they where my favorite crackers ever in the 80s in the mid 90s they had to go and mess with the taste and ruined them!. A few years back thay said they had the original flavor back but no they dont belive me in 1986 they where much better!

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