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12/19/2007: SweeTarts Mystery Squeez Slush, and a Whoville Christmas tree!

Holy Mary, we’re getting dangerously close to Christmas. It really kinda flew by this year, didn’t it? I’m getting the feeling that a lot of people just want it to be over and done with, but I could go for another 2-3 weeks. This may be the first year that I make a genuine attempt to forgo my usual post-holiday blues and try to extend the Christmasness until the actual end of December.

Growing up, I always felt a little dirty and ashamed after Christmas. I’d always spend December thinking about nothing but presents and our family’s big party, completely neglecting my schoolwork to the point where it was a given that my grades were going to be total shit for the winter quarter. My notebooks were always a giant mess throughout December, and I’d pretty much dog it on every test and homework assignment until the holidays were out of my system. By 12/27 or so, it’d hit me: Christmas was over, school was coming back, and I had a shitload of work and explaining to do.

Obviously, living as an adult in the real world taught me that such attitudes don’t fly, but I still always feel like I’ve done something wrong when Christmas finally passes. Or maybe it’s just that there’s a void when you can no longer live through your tinsel and trees. Or maybe January just sucks. It’s cold, it’s decidedly non-merry, and I waste around 5,000 checks because it takes me at least three months to remember that the year has changed.

I can’t believe that I’m only just finding these now, without any prior knowledge that they even existed. These extremely cool SweeTarts “Squeez” bottles are 100% Christmas, bearing holiday tributes both in design and flavor. I’ve seen a ton of candies with a vaguely North Polian twist, but this one may trump ‘em all. “Mystery Squeez Slush” caters to two very important markets: People who want a little holidayness in their candy flavor names, and people who don’t want to know what they’re eating. I consider myself a card-carrying member of both of those markets; thus, “Mystery Squeez Slush” is my new god.

If you’ve never had a SweeTarts Squeez, they’re essentially half-sized toothpaste tubes, filled with sour-flavored goo instead. Though I expected the “mystery” flavor to be something negotiably within the Christmas palette (Peppermint, maybe?), it’s actually a lot closer to lemonade. Lemonade doesn’t have much to do with Christmas, but then, neither do SweeTarts.

I’d also like to take this time to draw attention to the ice blue touches on the packaging. I absolutely love how ice blue has entered the secret club of acceptable Christmas colors. Red and green are nice, but sometimes, situations call for a color a little less pupil-dilating. Every time I see something in this shade of ice blue, I feel like I just took a shower.

Thumbs up! As far as special holiday editions go, this one clicks on all cylinders: It’s got the Christmassy packaging, a limited edition flavor with ties to Santa, ice blue highlights, and the perfect size for stuffing a stocking.

Hey, remember that Charlie Brown Christmas tree replica I wrote about last year? Well, Urban Outfitters is at it again, this time with the “Authentic Whoville Tree,” from Dr. Seuss’s How The Grinch Stole Christmas. Since it’s already a few dollars cheaper than Chuck’s older model, I guess my initial reaction was on the money: A Whoville tree probably isn’t iconic enough to drive anyone batty with joy.

The novelty tree is around two feet tall, with the correct bunch of stringed ornaments, curvable branches, and a perpetual drooping tilt. The only problem is that…well, if I didn’t tell you that it was a Whoville tree, would you have known? Maybe, but most wouldn’t: They’d just think it was an ugly, misshapen fake tree picked up from a closeout outlet. That’s not the kind of impression I want to make for twenty bucks, so it’s fortunate that I have no friends and nobody will see this thing on top of my wall unit.

I exaggerate. I consider the UPS man my friend. And maybe the casino host at Bally’s.

Click here to see the Whoville tree’s big cardboard box, or here if you’re interested in buying one. They’re especially nice if you have an errant corner shelf just waiting for the right objet d’art. We don’t have such a corner shelf, but I like it well enough anyway. It’s kooky. Slanted trees are kooky!

The Advent Calendar has been updated for December 18th. Yes, I realize that this is the 19th, and I’ve only got four hours or so to stay on deadline. Joke’s on you: The entry for the 18th was posted well over twelve hours late. I’ve already missed one deadline, so there’s no sense in becoming reliable now. I’m free to cavort with the other procrastinators and party till my eyes water. See ya in Hell, suckers!

sorry, I hate it when people do that. Good job with the calendar this year, Matt. You do not disappoint.

I just have to say that I have no idea how you are going to top this year’s Advent Calendar. I mean holy crap, as inane as it is, this thing rivals many Hollywood movies in it’s complexity. I don’t see how you have the time. Just wanted you to know that your hard work is appreciated.

P.S. Did anyone notice Scut Farkus on CSI a week or so ago? He was in the dogfighting episode.

I’ve always loved ice-blue. I think it’s something to do with it being Gemini Man’s color in MM3 and he gives you kickass lasers…

I haven’t had a Squeez in YEARS! I used to be addicted to that stuff. It was basically the stuff (usually cherry) you see inside Gushers, but in tube form like this. I think they still make them, but they’re usually in the cheap/novelty candy aisle instead of the regular candy aisle. I should look around there more often.

yeah, I saw that. couldn’t believe it was him. was he also one of the soldiers with Oded Fehrar (sp) in Resident Evil: Apocolypse? the guy with the really bad Russian accent? looked just like him.

What I was calling my Christmas Trinity (Gingerbread Pop Tarts, Pomegranate 7up and peppermint Peeps - it took almost 3 weeks but I found them all) is now a Quadrilogy. Now I have to hunt down these holiday inspired SweeTarts Squeez tubez. Thanks Matt! ;P

And if you hadn’t told me it was the Whoville tree, I probably would’ve thought it was a really crappy version of the Charlie Brown tree.

I’m not sure I how feel about the Mystery Squeez Slush. I was all about the red jelly in a tube back in the day, but I’m not so enthusiastic about the white paste. Especially when they don’t even tell you what the flavor is. Plus, it makes me think of the “Cream Slush” from Sonic, which has to be the worst bit of marketing since Pustulios cream-filled breakfast snackers.

I wouldn’t have known it was a whoville tree either, if you didn’t tell me. Also that candy looks pretty tasty.

Im with you on the wrong date on checks senario, that shit would always bite me on the ass espesially when going to a payday advance/loanshark joint. they demand your checks be flawless so you dont somehow scam them before they can scam you, somtimes I would only have one check left and have already paid them the back the last loan and have one shot at writing the bloody check right or starve and not pay rent, shitty loan sharks. Uhh Merry Christmas.

That stuff reminds me of this “gum” i used to eat all the time when i was a kid, grape flavoured really Un-bubbley bubble gum, loved it.
and i too wouldve had no idea it was the whoo-ville tree.

It’s great to once again enjoy the advent goodness after being internetless all last winter! Looking forward to another XMAS at X-E!

The Advent Calendar is so completely awesome this year. I just went to the Playmobil website and ordered myself a catalog, purely because I love catalogs and I want to look at all the crazy things Playmobil has to offer. Browsing the website just doesn’t have the same feel to it.

I have seen the original animated Grinch approximately 47,000 times, and I would never in a million years have known that was a Whoville tree. Like you said, Matt, it just looks crappy and secondhand.

Tomorrow’s the 20th and as a kid that meant the zero hour as far as Santa’s arrival.

Also, the last week before Christmas break I usually phoned in my homework. This didn’t start until high school, though.

I have never seen these before. I’m not generally fond of squeeze-goo candies, but even I will admit, this rocks.

Incidentally, so does the Advent Calender. The work you put into making this complex and exciting is so amazing, I don’t think most people here will mind granting you the extra time to get them ready.

Im about to bust into the first advent calender to refresh my brain! Its funny a lot of the links are broken but the pages are still floating around in the limbo of cyber space.

The tree does look pretty disappointing… The only thing that could come out of Who-Ville that would impress most people are those six-legged racks of lamb…

DocDragon: Don’t forget the toys! When I was a kid I would have given anything for one of those giant ride-on musical instruments that take like eight people to play. I probably still would.

As a prank, I would totally tell somebody that the Mystery Squeez Slush is a new brand of toothpaste.

Of course, they won’t think it’s very funny when they have to pay for the dental bills. O_o

Is it just me or does anybody else think that the character who’s probably most like Matt in real life is Waiterbot?

Geez. Yeah, I’m not all too convinced about the Whoville tree. Charlie Brown be da coolest.

I think my favorite picture of all time is the shot of James Lipton filming Legotron and Box Carol in the window.

If it makes you feel better - Christmas doesn’t end at my house until Little Christmas. Heck, in Mexico, Little Christmas is essentially Christmas Day.

Fuck. I debated whether or not to triple post, but I couldn’t let it slide. There should be a “with” up there between “Box” and “Carol”. I swear I’ll shut up now. I wasn’t even here.

I have always identified most with Knacks. He has to put up with a lot of shit and things never seem to go his way, but he still always manages to stay enthusiastic and find little things to be happy about, even during his emo spells. Which is pretty much how my life goes.

In the “Which Advent character are you?” camp, I must reluctantly admit, I am Mista Snowman. Completely Christmas obsessed, and love everything, seeing Christmas magic in all things. Which sometimes irritates my wife.

I am Legotron, I cant say why but I digg his cynical/shitty attitude. Matt is Knacks, has to be. come on its the only character he has a Myspace for. sheesh.

and for all those afraid of double triple posting, there is no rule against it, how do you think the bloody post get so long, if your shy about posting multiple times, post under different names only Matt will know the difference.

Mortalwind: It isn’t posting multiple times people apologize for, it’s posting multiple times in a row, usually because they forgot something. People like to apologize for that just to be courteous, because it can get annoying and spammy when the same person posts many times in a row unnecessarily.

Yeah, it’s no big deal, but to give everyone’s comments a fair chance to digest, double/triple-posting should be avoided if possible. (Like I said, though…not a big deal, just not something to make a habit of!)

I was in Target today noticing the large amount of baby blue Christmas decorations. I guess, maybe if you are doing a theme tree it’s alright. But theme trees bore me.
How big is that tree? If it was mentioned in the comments I apologize, I am trying to avoid the comments until I catch up on the advent, I am only at 14. But I am loving them.

I’d probably identify with Box. I can be rather pragmatic at times, but usually I try to go with the flow.

Ever since Goob said I reminded of Tigerboy, evertime I read him I think, “yeah, I would say that”, so that’s who I officially relate to; I needs a t-shirt: “I am Tigerboy” and on the back it qould say “grrrrr”

Chris: This came up in another thread, but I think I relate mostly with Knacks. I will say that Waiterbot is my favorite character in the AC by far, though, and also the easiest to write for because he just seems to “talk” for himself.

Actually the back should say, “I swear to God I will hold you down and shit on your head”

I guess I identify most with Knacks. I can be sort of sensitive and easily feel left out. But once Knacks has had time to process stuff he bounces back okay. I’m sort of like that too (I think). And no matter what happens, nothing can stop his love of Christmas. Like jazzy said, he always finds little things to be happy about.

The tree does look pretty disappointingâ€¦ The only thing that could come out of Who-Ville that would impress most people are those six-legged racks of lambâ€¦

Or a can clearly labeled “Who Hash.” My Dad & I now call all Corned Beef Hash “Who Hash” because of the cartoon.

And Advent Chacter I most identify with? I might be a Tigerboy myself. This sounds like a good idea for one of those crappy “Which ___ Are you?” Myspace Personality Quizzes.

Which character would I be? I honestly have no idea. On one hand I can be hard-working like Kuse, but I can also be lazy Knacks is sometimes. I can definately eat like Trudy. But I can also be boring and easily ignorable like one of those guys Waiterbot beat up the the other day. I can exhibit a personality trait from all of the characters.

So I guess I would be Knacks-Kuse-Mare-Box-Trudy-Tigerboy-Legotron- MistaSnowman-Hare-JamesLipton-Cher-Hssxxlllo-Santa.

Whatever happened to that No Doubt? Whatever happened to No Doubt, period? Gwen solo makes me wanna vomit

I will agree with the masses and say that I would definitely not recognize that tree unless somebody told me what it was.

Y’know what I miss about high school in December? We may have had over-the-break homework, but we didn’t have exams until the end of January. Oh, and the fact that I didn’t work during Christmas holidays back then. I miss being able to chill out all day in the living room reading, with the Christmas tree all lit up. Now I don’t get home until about 8:00pm and have other crap to do.

Gah, I’m starting to sound like Knacks. Sorry. On that subject, however, I think I identify with three characters the most: Mista Snowman (sometimes I’m ridiculously festive and upbeat), Knacks (as demonstrated above), and Orange Oswald (sometimes I feel really ‘background character’-ish, but people still have a vague idea of who I am).

I would be a weird hybrid between Kuse, Mista Snowman and James Lipton. James Lipton always says random things, much like myself. Mista snowman is all about the santa and his cronies like me, and kuse because he is busting his ass all of the time and getting nowhere.

I guess I’m like Legotron. I’m usually working towards my own, off-the-wall goals, but usually liked for being the goofball/weirdo I am.

I heart the icy blue as well. I gotta say, each year, I break away more and more from the RED and GREEN and look for more things with metallics, white and pastels. This year, all of my wrapping papers are white and different metallics. It looks the best when you wrap two or more gifts separately (in coordinating papers) and then tie them together in a stack with ribbon. I did that for two of my friends’ kids and their eyes almost popped out of their heads when they saw them (although that was probably because they saw they were getting multiple gifts…).

I gues the character i’m most like is Legotron. For the reasons Knegative stated.

After having read the site for years and years, I have finally obtained the greatest christmas gift in the history of christmas. See pictures.

Dear Lord, the Seuss tree box is awesome but the tree? Dead on with the closeout sale description. You’d think they’d at least have the thing come with Seussian ornaments or even the weird Star pictured on the box but…
Weird.

So when are they going to be selling Halloween-Themed Nightmare Before Christmas Trees? Because I would buy two of them just to have the winged skull on the top.
-Jared

Matt, that tree would be the ultimate sympathy-getter. Just tell people that some bloke bumped in to you carrying it and broke it, add tears and statements of how “Little Jimmy won’t be able to enjoy his tree this year”.

Star: I’m glad someone else spotted the plunger-stand. I looked at the pictures before reading Matt’s entry and immediately thought, “Matt decorates his toilet accessories for the holidays? Damn, he’s hardcore.”

As for the “Which AC character are you?” thing, I’m going to say Kuse and Legotron–which is not really a copout, since it would only take one night’s heavy drinking and an unwise wager for Kuse to become part of the One Man Gang. Just think how stylish that gray noggin would look at the top of ol’ Maypole Head…

Does this fake food make u poop light blue too? I’ve had adverse reactions to new and fun food that hide a dark side. LOL
Merry Holidays and Happy Xmas! D’oh!

DAT, see, that alone would actually make me tempted to buy it. Even more if it had some form of bio-luminescent ingredient.

I don’t want to be a downer here, but that mystery gloop looks bloody ‘orrible. It reminds me of the fake snow in the previous entry, only this time they’re tricking you into eating it.

I can’t find who asked this question, it may have been in the last blog, but anywho, you can buy Playmobil stuff locally at places like Target, Toys R Us, etc.

Speaking of Playmobil, I was shopping for my office party’s dirty Santa gift last night, and I walked by Target’s Playmobil section and saw the pirate’s skull island set up and our big ass earring pirate friend was there standing by a treasure chest full of booty.

That SweeTart squeeze goo looks delicious. Liquid and goo candies are towards the top of my list as far as favorite candies. I’ve never seen this crap, but if I stumble across it, I’ll definitely sample a tube.

If you’re referring to that gritty, barely holds its consistency, squeeze tube bubble gum, then I, too, loved that crappy stuff.

As a standalone tree, I don’t recognize it as a Whoville tree. If there were Whos standing around it, then it would be an obvious slap in my face that it’s a Whoville tree.

If I were anyone on the AC, I’d be Mista Snowman, as his Christmas spirit is quite similar to mine. I can find nothing wrong with Christmas. I love parking a mile away from the mall, dealing with huge, unruly crowds. Everybody that’s out Christmas shopping is so pissed off, I think I’m the only one walking around with a smile because all I can think of is that the only reason so many people are there right now is because of Christmas. So everything, good or bad, is Christmasy to me this time of year.

Waiterbot reminds me of my aunt Wanda, who looks like a mirrored image of John Denver. Why he reminds me of her, I’m not sure, but for some reason whenever I look at Waiterbot I think of her.

Knacks: There’s just something about this character I really like. I think it’s his constant optimism even when things don’t go the way he would like.

Nork, it was me that asked about Playmobil. And thanks. XD If I ever get money again, I’ll have to go check out Target.

Also, this is from threads and threads ago (I was playing catch-up last night), but somebody mentioned Sweet Pickles. I just wanted to thank that person for jogging my memory. I had two of the Strawberry Library books, which aren’t part of Sweet Pickles but are written by one of the same guys.

Hmm…as for the AC, Mista Snowman always gets a laugh out of me. He’s so random and cheerful.

I think if I found one of those Christmas edition Sweettart Squeez tubes I would buy one. I like the regular ones but for what you get it seems like a rip off. I do like the gritty sugary gooey stuff. Not for a buck a tube though, I have only had them once.

Arkenor and fistpittingnork I’m so glad to see people identify with mr snowman. I started to get sad that no one here had insane moderately-retarded levels of christmas cheer.

Me, I’d probably be Mare, because I can shoot lighting from my hands and like to say fuck at places in sentences that don’t necessary need it

Matt, I’ve been following this site for the past 2 months and I’ve gotta say that it’s a blast to read. I can relate to a ton of stuff you’re writing about. Some of it’s even educational (weird, right?).

But, yeah, this whole advent thing is really flippen sweet. It’s getting me more pumped for (granted, a rapidly-approaching) Christmas.

But you’re right. I really think I prefered the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree…

Knegative: Thanks, man. Luckily they are going to get the funeral over with quickly, so hopefully I can still manage to get some of my Christmas cheer back before the big day. This place is definitely helping with that.

fistpittingnork, I am very glad I don’t have any relatives who look like John Denver, much less ones who remind me of Waiterbot. That sounds sort of frightening.

I have a friend who used to use “Mystery Squeezit” as an internet name, and another friend pointed out the similarity of “Mystery Squeez”, which I somehow missed. I think this is a vast conspiracy. A vast, Christmas magic conspiracy.

I think I would be most like James Lipton…outwardly pretty normal, but inside weird and random as all get out.

I’d probably be most like Knacks - I see him as the most philosophical and introspective of the AC crew, and I find myself most identifying with those characteristics.

There’s not really anything I can say to change the mood about what happened, but best wishes for you and the family to keep your heads about you this Christmas. Not that it’s a good thing something like this happened this time of year, but one positive point is at least it was time when families are together, so nobody should be lacking on support.

As far as the whole Waiterbot -> Aunt Wanda -> John Denver thing. I really can’t explain it. I’m not sure if it’s just the way he stands and looks around like he just doesn’t give a shit about anything surrounding him or the way he’s just outright rude about everything with everybody or what.

Oh, but John Denver and Waiterbot, outside of the association with Wanda, tie into eachother by no other means.

I would definatley identify with Knacks most of all. Except, of course, I don’t have an antenna on my head. Maybe I should get one.

Oh, and I have some Mista Snowman in me as well, because CHRISTMAS CRAP MAKES ME SHOUT WITH CHRISTMASSY JOY!!!!!

That Whoville tree is just pitiful. The Charlie Brown tree works because it’s instantly identifiable, and the point comes across even if you haven’t seen Charlie Brown. But the Whoville tree? Looks like the neighbor’s cat wrestled it. Yuck.

I went to a dinner party last night with some close friends from church choir. Much wine was consumed and I did NOT want to get up this morning. But I digress…Anyway, the Christmas tree there had this cool thing on it that let you turn the lights on and off by just saying “Lights” (with AUTHORITY).

Well this was fun for about 5 minutes, and then we realized that it went on an off at random times if the conversation got loud enough. So we would be randomly talking, laughter would break out, and the tree would go off, which made us laugh more, which turned the tree on. Hilarious stuff…

I’ve got two more workdays before Christmas break and I have no idea how I’m going to survive them. Not because they are busy, but because I’m bored out of my mind!

Nork: That is a very good way of looking at it. Luckily this is a very loving family and they have lots of support year-round. It’s brought me a lot of peace to realize that this child was adopted into a family with so much love, and that’s how he lived right up to his last day.

On a less sad note, I’ve decided that I may as well enjoy Christmas no matter what, since after all it will be a whole year before it comes around again. I’ve discovered that while eggnog is disgustingly thick to me (I should have known, since I practically gag just on whole milk), I totally love Silk Soy Nog, so I’ve been drinking that. I’ve got the Jukebox going, I may bake some more cookies later, and I’ve been enjoying all kinds of greasy, horrible food.

To paraphrase Kuse, I’m gonna go get some fucking Chinese food and then I’m gonna fucking eat it.

Have you listened to Waiterbot’s vlog on Matt’s YouTube channel yet? If not, then you can hear for yourself how Waiterbot sounds!

I’d be the Owl. I’m around, but not really understood unless it’s nessessary by somebody else. Uh, I mean… Hoot!

(I also know it takes one, two-hoo, thrrrree licks to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop.)

What I want to know is does Knacks have control of the position of that antennae, does it move freely like a wagging tail or does he have to ’style’ it in place and it just remains there?

Gotta say that mystery squeez looks kinda nasty. It reminds me off that gum that came in a tube. I used to eat that stuff like crazy, it was never gum consistency. I’m sure I have a 1pd ball of it in my stomach…
Also on another note next years xmas craft gifts: toilet plunger xmas trees!

I’m gonna go with the Knacks/Mista Snowman thing as well. I can be surly and enjoy a good funk now and then, but I get giddy over the most mundane things.
Like that “Fur Real” parrot? that thing is the coolest.thing.ever.

and- i may get my Hssxxlllo in time for christmas! SQUEEE! if there is a Santa, he can make it happen!
GoSantaGo!

I’m gonna go with Legotron just because he’s sarcastic and pessimistic like I tend to be.

Oh, but John Denver and Waiterbot, outside of the association with Wanda, tie into eachother by no other means.

Which is a pity. I really want a “John Denver and Waiterbot” Christmas vinyl record.

good lord a waiterbot duet with the delrubio triplets would be the most amazing thing ever. even if they are dead. are they?

By the way, Matt, I know how you feel about the Post-Christmas let down. It’s just a natural feeling that happens with anything that we place a lot of importance on, like vacations, holidays, etc. Sometimes the anticipation is better than the actual event (or what follows)…

I would say I’m some fucked-up mutant mixture of (good) Mare and Mista Snowman with a little Knacks thrown in. Go figure that one out.

No one would recognize it as a Whoville tree because it looks nothing like the friggin’ illustration! The ornaments and star are not even close to how they’re drawn.

Okay, so my mind has been lingering on this Waiterbot Christmas Album idea since my last post. I’m thinking classic Christmas songs in spoken-word form (as seems to be Waiterbot’s style), with commentary thrown in. Man, that would be a definate classic in our house. We already quote Waiterbot’s first vlog ad nauseum.

Matt, I would buy Advent Calendar T-Shirts (Though I imagine the licensing would be difficult).

If you liked William Shatner’s Welcome Home Christmas album, you’ll love Waiterbot’s soon-to-be released Fuck Off, Santa 2-disc compilation.

I really wanted to have them for this year, but I just got too busy. I will definitely be making one sooner or later, though. I’m not worried about licensing because any character that would be on a shirt would be drawn/rendered/painted/whatever, and would look different enough from the licensed figures.

The one that seemed most natural to me was an Obey Giant-style Waiterbot shirt (in visual style…not in wording), as it’d be a kind of cool, abstract shirt that wouldn’t just look like some lame website tee.

Speaking of Waiterbot, sorry about the late entry today. (Or, late entry for yesterday.) Will be up tonight at some point.

LOVE the obey style idea Matt.
When can i get my mitts on one???
And as for the survey id have to go with one of the random lego guys, I too am easily forgettable.

Well, if you need other clothing ideas for characters:
Waiterbetty - “Serious Sex Face”
Legotron - “Got Heads?”
Mare, Kuse and Box - “Good God…what kind of fucked up uterus do I have?!”
Hssxxlllo - Nuff said, really

Hssxxlllo and hare remind me of some of the characters in final fantasy tactics.

fistpittingnork, for some reason the idea of sinister Hssxxlllo these days just makes me think “Good…bad…I’m the guy with the hairdryer”

I want a pullover hoodie with a picture of Carol with her smiling face and her arms high over her head with a caption underneath that reads “GIRLS DON’T SHIT!”

Special K, it should come in dark tan/light brown or pink…or pink lettering on brown.

Definately baby pink! And maybe the caption could go on the back in brown! Muhuwahahhahaha! I may have to make bootleg hoodies and use the proceeds to buy Matt stuff off his invisible Amazon wishlist!

Seeing as most websites include the address on the product somewhere, would Matt need to put “X-Entertainment.com (No, It Is Not A Porn Site)“?

Guise: That could go across the shoulders or something… or down the arms. hahahahaha

Personally, I’d rather have an Advent comic/picture book instead of clothes. Or even a book of all of the Advent Calendars combined. Throw in some old adverts as extras and it would sell MILLIONS!

Cameron I refer to that feeling as the morning-after effect. like you go to a party on a saturday night and have tons of fun, and then sunday is just so depressing….or full of regret

fistpittingnork: I did the same thing when I went shopping: I was whistling and having a great time. I think I even pissed off the Spit Navy (let’s see who pays attention) people as I walked in the door.

jazzy: Ditto what fistpittingnork said, and make your cookies and do whatever it takes to get yourself up. Also, make some fudge. Rich, chocolately good fudge.

Cameron they are making us go to work tomorrow for 2 fucking hours even though we have nothing to do. It’s crazy. I so wanted to start my holiday off tomorrow. But I get two paid weeks off - thank you tax payers!- so I can’t complain too much.

I still want my Tigerboy shirt to say what I said earlier; it fits quite well. And the Kuse shirt must say the now immortal “I’m going to get some fucking coffee and then I’m going to fucking drink it.” I say variations of that all day long…

I have to cashier 7-8 hours every day from now through Christmas Eve. Yeah. Not where I wanna be

Matt:
as you know, Some of us advent-urers have been doodling about. I’m sure with some “pretty-please”s you could get us to doodle up some kind of Art for the Advent Calendar- Ann’s Bunny Revolucion one definitely comes to mind.

My FAVORITE Advent Chracters? It would by far be James Lipton, followed by Waiterbot and Mista Snowman.

It would be awesome if we got the actual James Lipton to endorse any of this merchandise, especially the ones that features his LEGO Counterpart.

I also find it odd that NONE of the Adventers have noticed that Mrs. Snowman had been killed off and sacrificed to resurrect Santa-X.

-”O Come All Ye Faithful, For I Am Waiterbot!”
-”LEGO Guys Roasting on an Open Fire!”
-”A Waiterbot that Posessed Santa Claus is Comin’ To Town!”
-”Deck The Halls…with LEGO Heads”
-”Rockin’ Around The Christmas Chair.”
-And of course, His version of “Carol of The Bells” which would go like this:

“Da da da da
Da da da da
Da Da da da
I hate you, Santa!
I hate you, Knacks!
I really hate all these people trying to prevent me from pimping Cher!”

It seems like the harder I try to keep my spirits up the worse things get. I just found out my elderly neighbor, the ONLY neighbor we have who has always been kind and done things to help my family, has breast cancer.

There isn’t anything we can say that’ll quick-fix this. Just know that we’re thinking about ya, Jazzy

kittymao, i totatlly agree with your idea. that would be so awsome. i could also see exodous, dethklok (an animated special maybe?), amon amarth, and rob zombie. twisted sister had an xmas album last year, btw.

as for what character i’m most like, i’d have to say either knacks or kuse. i work hard like kuse, but somehow i just identify more with knacks, plus i’m a computer geek and somethimes feel like a fith wheel (just like knacks does to kuse and mare). i can really relate to mista snowman, also. i get obsessed with christmas every year. same with halloween. as far as the other characters go, i know i would love to have a friend like tigerboy. that would be awsome.

hey matt, what happened to some of the eariler characters from several years ago like Bird the crow?

Hang in there, jazzy. :( Try to get through the next week engulfed in as much family time as possible.

The character I most identify with is Waiterbetty, because guys are always fucking with my head.

Though the guy I went out with last night seems promising. Found out that great stereotype about Italian guys is totally true.

Jazzy, I’m sorry to hear about your neighbor and the kid. Wow, he was adopted, huh? That must have been an AMAZING family!

I think I’m most like ‘our’ Mare, as far as the AC characters go. Mostly in the pretty easy going until you cross a line department, tho I do try to be forgiving, too.

I kind of feel like I should apologize for my above whiny comment. It’s not like cashiering is the worst thing in the world….I had just gotten off work and was in a bad mood. And I’m not saying this only because of the misfortunes being discussed here; no one really needs to hear that no matter what the situation.

Speaking of misfortune, Jazzy, you have my sympathy. And The Good Guy, too. I don’t really have anything constructive to say; I’m sure you have heard (or will hear) it all. But I just felt the need to say that both of you have been in my thoughts a lot the past couple days, and I’m sure that goes for everyone here.

I remember watching the special on TV every year as a kid. This week my 8 yr old recorded it on the DVR and then watched it later.

I wonder how that’s going to seem years from now when he’s grown up? There’s something special to me about watching the very same thing as the rest of the kids in the nation at about the same time and then talking about it and the toy commercials at school the next day.

I know what you mean, Mikey. I’ve got all of my favorite Christmas specials on DVD, but I still make it a point to watch the broadcast whenever possible. With DVR becoming more and more popular, it seems that shared experience isn’t going to really be part of the next generation.

i usually pronounce it “hiss ex low” but i am pretty sure that is wrong, didn’t his pronounciation get clarified on the #23 thread at some point?

It’s still my birthday in my time zone, and I’m staying up for every last minute of it. If I’m really lucky, perhaps a new calendar entry will magically appear too.

I can’t wait for the conclusion of the advent calendar. I think this is the best one yet.

I pronounce it (in my head) as “Hack-zill-oh”. I am well aware that I am very wrong, but I keep doing it since I’m probably the only one to “think” it that way.

I’m curious to see the conclusion, but in all honesty, with the writer’s strike happening, I wish we could have a month more advent calendar.

I saw that Christmas Sqeez stuff last weekend while pillaging through candy at Walgreens. Was tempted to get it, but passed. Tastes like lemons? Thats so un-christmassy..I must have it now!

Even though it just looks like a cheap tree that got ran over by Uncle Herbs ‘89 Taurus. Between that and the Charlie Brown tree from before makes me actually want to shop at Urban Outfitters. I mean..not like I need another pair of cargo pants, but those trees are all sorts of rad.

It’s 1:30AM and the later it gets the less I want to go to sleep and the angrier I get that I have to get up and go to work for only two friggin’ hours…ugh

I loved 18 and 19…I even felt kind of bad for Hare, and wish that Mare II could have had the chance to kick her ass. I almost cried, too - but I’m glad she at least got to tell someone what happened to her.

If the girls were going for obscure 90210 trivia, they shouldn’t have asked the Donna Martin Graduates question. I’ve never seen a single episode and I knew the answer to that. EVERYBODY does. It’s like the most infamous moment of the entire series.

Invader Norbert: Just for the record, the Advent-urers have been through the Mrs Snowman thing…and pretty much everything else, really. Great job, you guys!

I think there’s very little the Advent-urers haven’t been through, even outside the calendar, and I’m sure therapists are going to be really happy with the increased custom in the new year as a result.

Also, I really want a Waiterbot pimping t-shirt with Kittymao’s alluring Waiterbetty (with SSF) and GoGo Dancing caged Cher. With MST3k shadows of the LEGO guys gathered watching.

I also second Matt’s desire for Ann’s laminated posters (and Kitty’s Waiterbetty and Miami Advent), because seriously Kick Ass stuff.

Any links to this fanart for those of us who haven’t been following the Box 23 threads?

Thanks, everyone. Your support means a lot to me and I really appreciate it. I’m at a friend’s house now and they’re taking me shopping to take my mind off things. Hopefully the crazy Christmas atmosphere will inject a little spirit into my veins

Cameron, well, there’s a lot and some of them have some (semi-disturbing) backstory, but a few highlights:

Despite the spelling not really matching my pronounciation, I always read Hssxxlllo’s name as “Hex-silly-o”.

Well, the thread keeps swallowing my response when I post links, Graham, so click my name for a few highlights. Some have (semi-disturbing) backstories.

Sorry, Guise…the system thought you were spamming. I just approved the comment.

Guise, again, that page rocks. I’d like to see the reaction of someone outside of X-E stumbling across it.

I just read the 19th entry and cracked up when I saw Mista Snowman in the net hat thing and the fan. It fit perfectly with his forever “Ta-da!” pose.

Thanks Matt! Thought it might be that, but wasn’t sure as my browser tends to be kooky with forms sometimes.

fistpittingnork, I think the reaction would be a lot more interesting if they came across the Box 23 threads. Sometimes I crack up reading them.

Well, today is the last day I will have regular access to the internet (traveling to Texas…not sure about the computer/internet situation where I will be staying), so everyone have a safe and very Merry Christmas!!! I’ll see you guys on the flip side!!

I will miss the advent calendar dearly!

Trying to get that to work Guise,however even after enabling java, the site won’t play the clip.

Thanks, Guise. For a few minutes I thought that would be sappy, like the ones for Starbucks…

Is it evil of me to start expecting something similar in the Starbucks commercial? The girl nabbing the girl’s latte, the reindeer knocking that guy off the ski lift so he can have his coffee?

Guise
Is Irn Bru a beer, or some kind or energy drink, or what? The reason I ask is that the person in that cartoon looks like a young teen, and I can’t imagine that if Irn Bru was a beer, that it would be actively marketed to teens.

Old Jim, it’s a bright orange carbonated soft drink (though there is an energy drink version too) that comes from Scotland originally.

It tastes weird, can’t really describe it…some reckon it’s citrus-y, some say gingerbeer-y, some say it’s like Lucozade, to me it’s how I’d expect fizzy urine from a kitten fed nothing but satsumas to taste like.

Cats generally don’t like the smell of citrus a heck of a whole lot, so if you try to feed a kitty a tangerine, the only fizzing will be the kitten-cat itself. That’s why the cat with the Lime-helmet looks so pissed.

Guise
I’ve never had Irn Bru but I saw it all the time when I was in England for five weeks. I friend of mine’s girlfriend (now wife) grew up on the stuff so we took pictures of it. I think I’ve got a picture of an Irn Bru taxicab somewhere.

I just found out that I will be working New Year’s Day. We have to do a complete physical inventory count of our store.

Not fun. Oh well, I’d rather it be New Year’s than Christmas.

As an Irn Bru update…it’s actually a banned substance in the US. The FDA have said it contains carcinogenic colourings and so it’s a no-go.

Kingklash, I didn’t know that! Then again, there is an aftertaste to Irn Bru that could be the distilled bitterness and raw hatred of the cat after being force-fed citrus fruits…

I love that sketch! It’s better than Dead Parrot and almost as good as the Spanish Inquisition. Spent many a midnight back in high school watching MP on PBS…probably made me the warped person I am today.
“Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!”

Did anyone catch the Mr. Bean Christmas tv show this year? One of the canadian stations was showing that and a holiday episode of Little Mosque on the Prairie - both hifreakinlarious!

I love that Mr.Bean Xmas special! Comedic gold. I love when he slams the door in the faces of the caroling children.

I would be James Lipton, since I always have a camera in my hand, and harbor secret talents, like he does with bear impressions.

Didn’t we have the same commercial with the flying snowman and the same animation for like Brisk or something in the states? Off to the You Tubes…

Guise
That commercial was truly disturbing, however I don’t blame the snowman for dropping the kid, he was a little bastard for not sharing!

Not sure where I got Brisk from, but I so missed the joke - the commercial is an obvious parody of this moment from “the Snowman”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KRDCD_O4Cs
I guess it was lost somewhere in the back of my memory; that’s why it looked so familiar….

Janitor Lego guy kinda looks like Waldo from the old Nickelodeon show “Out of Control”

You know after seeing “The Snowman,” I think I prefer the ending from the Iron Bru commercial.

Well, I’m leaving work soon, so no more thread till Thursday. Have a great Christmas everybody! Matt, the advent has been the biggest Christmas event of 2007. You rule. (I will be reading it on my cell phone from here out. Yup. I’m pretty obsessed.)

Well electric is back on at my house, but the cable box is still being repaired, so this may be my last X-E visit until I come back to work on Wednesday.

There is a “manufactured for US only version”, but that isn’t really Irn-Bru as seen everywhere else.

We have Four O’clocks in front of our porch that spring up ev’ry spring. To keep the neigborhood felines out of them, we toss all our orange, grapefruit, and tangerine peels under them. Not 100% effective, but does cut down cat clutter. Especially if you accidentally bop one in the head with a peel.

Guise
It’s like the forbidden fruit now. It sounds horrid and would probably kill me and yet I want to try one. If nothing else so I can fly with Mista Snowman!

Lol, Dan H, although I don’t think Mista Snowman would drop someone for not giving them an Iron Bru….

Now I’m picturing Mista Snowman being tricked into being an Iron Bru mule for the US, flying in here with some contraband Iron Bru inside the snowy body…

Tres, it would be yet another part of Waiterbot’s operation! Pimping, Bru running, extortion and false imprisonment…Waiterbuddy is tough!

I agree with Matt, you win. Insert that stock footage of Old Ladies Clapping that Monty Python’s Flying Circus used so many times.

I suggest “Amaze-A-Vole Ltd.” or my personal favorite “Startle-A-Thompson’s-Gazelle Ltd.”

I have a cool story about XE. I work in a store that sells CDs. When I got off work today, I got in line to buy something I needed to pick up. The store was crazy of course, and only one cashier was working in that department. A customer asked the cashier for help finding Mariah Carey’s Christmas CD, but the computer system had crashed so he couldn’t look it up. I said, “I know I saw that CD the other day!” And I went and grabbed it. Then I realized that the only reason I knew what that CD looked like and remembered where it was, was because it was on Knacks’s MySpace. (I don’t work in the music department btw.)So Knacks helped me help the cashier and the customer! Yay!

Just read the latest advent entry, and it’s great. I didn’t see that coming.

“People get really freaked out by creepy Santa Clauses.” - It is so true, but it’s good to see the Santa from my school days is still in the business.

Um, I’m sick with an ear infection, the doc’s got me on kinda heavy narcotics right now, and am pretty stoned, so I may have missed something but…

Hey Matt, what toy is waiterbots head? It sort of looks like an anime version of Krang.

My favorite line of today’s AC entry: “Trust me, Knacks…I’m not going to just “forget” about the threat of giant, murderous rabbits.”

I fucking love the advent calendar and i dont think that is just the sake talking. seriously….i love being a graduate

You know Matt, a permanent page with links to the previous calendars and a FAQ (with the first question being ‘WTF is Waiterbot?’) might be a good idea. :D And maybe incorporate Knacks’ and Waiterbot’s respective links there as well.

That way you’d only have to provide one link on the AC page/blog during Advent season, and update it for next year in January with a link to the just-finished calendar, or with whatever else you want to update it with.

Moony: Yeah, I really should’ve done that this year, but you know me. :) I do think the story’s gotten so deep that reading the previous Advent Calendars is pretty much mandatory. One of the many projects for the new year will be developing a page that contains ALL of the past Calendars in one spot. (Which is especially useful since they seem to just go into hiding once January hits.)

mjgrass: Waiterbot’s head is actually an “Utrom” toy from the newer TMNT series. Utroms are essentially Krangish, but not really the same. (Waiterbot is NOT an Utrom, though!)

Happy holidays to the many of you who are leaving us today and tomorrow for family visits and vacations. Hopefully there will still be a few of us left to celebrate “virtually.”

#21 will be up in the middle of the night, then a blog post in the morning or afternoon. Unless things change. If they do, I’ll edit this comment and pretend I never made it.

Aweseomness! You know, I’ll be sad when the AC is over, but I am very excited to see what Matt has in store for us come January. The all new and improved X-E!

The tree does look pretty disappointingâ€¦ The only thing that could come out of Who-Ville that would impress most people are those six-legged racks of lambâ€¦

I was a Michael’s tonight, and I saw a Green Egg’s and Ham cookbook. I flipped through it a little and saw they has a recipe for roast beast. I wonder if they had any for lamb. Speaking for roast beast, my mom has always called it that, and I just realized a few years ago she stole it from The Grinch.

Oh yeah, I think I am most like Mista Snowman. I’m not that excited and crazy with Christmas but I am easily excitable. I’ve been known to get mighty strange looks from people who don’t know me very well when I get excited over something like a toy that I hadn’t seen since I was a child.

Betcha if you asked, one of the nice guys here with more coding experience than I have wouldn’t mind making the basic page for you to upload.