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11/21/2007: The 1991 Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade!

Quick Note: I’m spending oodles of money on this year’s Christmas/Advent wares, so if you want to help me recoup some of that, there’s an easy way to do it. If you’re taking advantage of Amazon’s ridiculously good Black Friday deals this weekend, please do so using this link right here. I’ll get a little referral fee, and that will let me buy more wacky-flavored candy canes without having to give up gasoline. Thanks!


Ha ha ha ha ha! Technically, I am NOT late! Up now, with like 10 minutes to spare before it’s actually Thanksgiving, is my review of the 1991 Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, filled with words, pics and video clips!

I must be honest with you: It’s the least interesting of the parades I’ve reviewed, and nothing exciting happens. In fact, after struggling to make the article go for at least two pages, I ultimately consolidated it into one longer page. There just wasn’t enough there. Next year, perhaps I should investigate things like this before it gets too late to pick a different parade.

On the other hand, it had Captain Planet, The Addams Family and, uh, Kelsey Grammer, and that’s at least good for something.

A Happy Thanksgiving to all who will be celebrating it tomorrow. Eat the food, drink the drinks and bask in the glow of a holiday season officially begun. Now that the bird parade is out of my hair, it’s time to paint this sum’bitch town red…and motherfuckin’ green. Holla.


While I’m here, I might as well knock this out of the way. I’m not sure if there’s anything to dislike about these neat little Play-Doh stocking stuffers, except for the fact that they’re sold together in really ugly plastic bags. If you’re able to convince yourself that they didn’t come in such ugly, useless bags, they become flawless.Each pack comes with two holiday-themed Play-Doh containers. One is shaped like an undecorated Christmas tree, while the other is a rather befuddled and egg-shaped snowman. You get white and red Play-Doh, while the containers themselves each host a small Play-Doh “cookie cutter”.

More interesting than any of this is the warning sticker on each container, alerting parents with allergy-laden children that Play-Doh contains wheat. This seems like a bold admission that most kids enjoy eating Play-Doh. Someday, they should just make outright edible, flavored Play-Doh and be done with it. We’re going to eat it anyway…it might as well have a hint of cherry and an ad campaign behind it.


Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

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Discussion Thread: 253 comments

Did I just trip out or were scary cartoon creatures singing queen ?

Ghosted by thejyav @ 11/22/2007 12:12 PM EST


There IS a recipe for flavored play-doh! It’s called “peanut butter play-doh” and my mom used to make it for me when i was a kid. Here’s the recipe: http://www.cooks.com/rec/view/0,167,152164-224196,00.html

I remember my friends and I would play with it outside and then eat it with dirt and leaves mixed into it cause we were like 3 and didn’t know any better.

Ghosted by Casey @ 11/22/2007 12:18 PM EST


“Last Christmas” butchered. George Michael must be spinning in his grave.

Well, I’m off. HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL.
*in John Ratzenburger voice* “I’m giving thanks, for all things bright and beautiful…”

Ghosted by The Manimal @ 11/22/2007 12:23 PM EST


Hello Kitty balloon?

I need to start watching the parade.

Ghosted by Knegative @ 11/22/2007 12:35 PM EST


Willard Scott!

Ghosted by dohopoki @ 11/22/2007 12:39 PM EST


Flippin awesome as usual. May your Turkey Day be filled with deflated turkeys, drunken uncles, and bad commercials. Keep it up!

Ghosted by illinijake @ 11/22/2007 12:40 PM EST


Wooo! Skating Care Bears!!

Ghosted by Mystie @ 11/22/2007 12:44 PM EST


Willard Scott yessssss. We’re making 25 (!!!) full-sized artichokes while watching the parade. Must say, that Care Bears float looked purdy good.

Ghosted by Matt @ 11/22/2007 12:46 PM EST


That Foster’s Home float was the most spectacular thing I’ve witnessed in a long time. I nearly peed myself.

Did anyone else get really emotional over the Virginia Tech marching band, or am I just a sap?

Were it not for a renegade sweet potato that refuses to get done, we might have had dinner ready before the parade was over. That isn’t allowed to happen or the world will explode. Thank you, rogue tuber.

Ghosted by jazzy @ 11/22/2007 12:48 PM EST


We haven’t started dinner and I only earlier realized how much of it I’m supposed to be cooking.

Ghosted by dohopoki @ 11/22/2007 12:51 PM EST


Am I the only one a little disappointed that Kermit isnt sagging over the crowd for old time sake

Ghosted by thejyav @ 11/22/2007 12:51 PM EST


I bet santa still looks over his shoulder every year for joey lawrence to pop up and steal his thunder.
Wow this is a lively Santa.

Ghosted by thejyavq @ 11/22/2007 12:58 PM EST


He’s also a pretty skinny Santa. Maybe that explains the extra pep.

Ghosted by jazzy @ 11/22/2007 12:59 PM EST


well we need to get going so happy thanksgiving to all and to all, go colts

Ghosted by thejyav @ 11/22/2007 1:02 PM EST


Highlights: the Rockettes, of course…and I woke up just in time for them! And Dolly Parton, so sue me I love her :-)

Yes, it was surreal to see Virginia Tech with the “missing man” space and all.

Manimal, “Last Christmas” has been no great shakes for me since it’s been overplayed the last few years, so whatever. There were worse covers the HSM starlet could do IMO.

Was that the “Gong Show” Milton Delugg in the end credits there?

Were there any Broadway performances? I didn’t see any on NBC, and thought there would be none because of the strike and all.

Matt, trivia question: has Mario ever been in a float/balloon? (I ask after seeing the SMGalaxy commercial) Also, did I say my cousin’s wife was actually in one of the parades you reviewed? I need to check which.

Finally, did I see CHUCK NORRIS on the Celebrity Apprentice commercial????????!!!!

Happy Thanksgiving all!

Ghosted by James @ 11/22/2007 1:08 PM EST


mmm sarah brightman looked soo yummy

Ghosted by Xenophobe @ 11/22/2007 1:10 PM EST


“Inside the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade” is on the History Channel right now!

Ghosted by DarkSideofBrightness @ 11/22/2007 1:11 PM EST


Hi-ho, bloggers! Happy Thanksgiving from an unusually warm Southern New Jersey, just outside of Philadelphia (and to the Canucks, who had their turkey last month).

There are some advantages to staying in the area for the holiday. My mom and stepdad are moving next month, so I opted for dinner with my biological father and his girlfriend instead. I spent the morning making gingerbread cookies and watching the parade. Yes, for the first time in at least three or four years, I got to see the full Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade with no stepdad-induced interruptions or fights for dominance of the remote control.

Also, that strike may have ground much of Broadway to a halt, but ironically the one number they CAN show is the one that would most interest almost everyone here, “Always Look On the Bright Side of Life” from “Spamalot.” Come on, you know you wanted to see grimy Monty Python knights doing a kick line with women in skimpy yellow raincoats first thing Thanksgiving morning.

I side with what everyone said about this year’s parade. The Care Bears rocked the house, the Hello Kitty balloon was the coolest thing I’ve seen in years, and I’m not a big Cartoon Network fan and I even was impressed with the Foster’s Home float.

(Speaking of Care Bears, I finally got a Santa Oopsy Bear last week – found him, Rudolph Cheer, and two others Matt didn’t have at the Rite Aid in Westmont. Unlike Matt, I wasn’t lucky enough to find them cheap, but sweet little Oopsy was such a charmer in his red suit, I couldn’t resist him.)

I may have seen the 1991 Parade in passing. I have vague memories of the Barbie float and the Adams Family float. It’s more likely I watched the Philadelphia parade, which I was devoted to throughout most of the 80s.

Ghosted by starwenn @ 11/22/2007 1:11 PM EST


Okay now that it’s over, some one please tell me they also saw a tickle me elmo commercial talking about elmo’s “consealed secret” and showed a blocky censor graphic over his crotch.

Ghosted by dohopoki @ 11/22/2007 1:12 PM EST


OK one more comment or two: is it just me, or did anyone else like the descriptions of the balloon characters by the commentators? Just seemed old school to me, like how they’d explain to us as kids who these guys were. Guess it made me feel like a kid, actually, which is what this is all about.

Mimitchi: I sense some sarcasm about Abby Kadabra there. (wow, a clumsy magician? Orko should sue. And what, did the Amazing Mumford get fired for the holidays?!!?) Well at least they didn’t do what we all know they would want to do and replace Big Bird with the Red Nightmare :-)

Shrek balloon needed more Puss in Boots. Or Fairy Godmother…Jennifer Saunders rocks :-)

Ghosted by James @ 11/22/2007 1:12 PM EST


First of all, watching the Foster’s Home cast performing that song was disturbing; Brian May should use his Doctorite power to do something about that (seriously, he does have a degree and a professionally published report in the UK).

Also, that Abby Kadaver character is pretty darned ugly. Of course, my main impression of Sesame Street is that it’s a cash grab. People do watch PBS for free you know!

Thanks for the new parade report. There is a problem I have though; at the end of the Pink Panther routine they talk about the Best Band in the Land. I assume they’re talking about the marching band from The Ohio State University. What, you can’t refer to them as the Best Damn Band in the Land like you should?

Ghosted by mjf7583 @ 11/22/2007 1:30 PM EST


Happy Thanksgiving Everybody

Ghosted by Double G @ 11/22/2007 1:36 PM EST


Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

I liked the parade review this year, because the few things you covered were pretty good. I went to see Rock-a-Doodle at the dollar show, and it was pretty terrible. Haven’t seen it since, though, so who knows. I was also the only person I knew who ever liked Captain Planet, so that was a fun inclusion.

Reading the comments on this year’s parade makes me wish I got up to see it.
I’ll be working tomorrow. :( First time I ever leave my house on the day after Thanksgiving and I’ve got to work it. Wish me luck so I don’t die.

Ghosted by Rainbowfeet @ 11/22/2007 1:54 PM EST


mjf: I’m a huge Queen fan and I loved the Foster’s Home float. I guess it helps if you’re a fan of the show and familiar with the character Cheese. As for Brian May, he has a history of being pretty liberal with supporting various uses of Queen songs, so I doubt he’d have much to say in protest :)

Ghosted by jazzy @ 11/22/2007 2:04 PM EST


I loved the Care Bears float!
I am going to my cousins’ house for Thanksgiving dinner.
Love,
Jillian Tyrie from Long Island

Ghosted by mimitchi33 @ 11/22/2007 3:00 PM EST


I just tuned in, and I have no idea what I’ve missed and what’s still coming up. I really wanted to see Hello Kitty, but now I want to see this Foster’s float too.
It’s really weird to know everybody’s getting ready for a big dinner and not be cooking anything. We roasted a whole duck yesterday, and I thought we could build a meal around the leftovers but my brother just informed me that he hated it, so now I’m back to square one.
The Foster’s float just came on! “Blue, you’re my best friend!” Adorable!

Ghosted by squee4242 @ 11/22/2007 3:16 PM EST


I feel good about how that article went. Better than this years crap parade for chumps. Happy T-Day to all!

Ghosted by Lucky @ 11/22/2007 4:18 PM EST


Manimal is he actually dead? ‘Course, if hearing ‘Last Christmas’ in Engrish didn’t make him spin something at least, then he’s unspinnable. ;)

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!

Ghosted by Moony @ 11/22/2007 4:20 PM EST


Full. So full.

Ghosted by dohopoki @ 11/22/2007 4:32 PM EST


George Michael? You mean Jimmy Eat World are spinning in their grave.

Or tour bus at least. JEW pwned that song. Who are we talking about sung it, anyway.

I didn’t watch the parade, of course.

Ghosted by Knegative @ 11/22/2007 4:41 PM EST


It was one of the kids from High School Musical. I thought it was an okay rendition. I liked it better than the Jimmy Eat World version, anyway.
Did I miss something earlier in the parade or did they really not let Willard say anything?

Ghosted by squee4242 @ 11/22/2007 5:21 PM EST


Oh hoh hoh. Well played, Squee. Well played.

High School musical :roll:

Ghosted by Knegative @ 11/22/2007 5:25 PM EST


Hey Matt,

Great article, I remember seeing this one. Looks like you messed up the links on the pictures a lil bit. Happy Turkey Day.

Ghosted by Cotter @ 11/22/2007 5:25 PM EST


LOL Kneg I actually reworded that to be as diplomatic as possible. I wasn’t really trying to diss Jimmy Eat World ;)

Ghosted by squee4242 @ 11/22/2007 6:37 PM EST


Happy Thanksgiving one and all.

Ghosted by Acereporter @ 11/22/2007 6:38 PM EST


I knew your opinion on JEW’s version from last year. I actually counted on you being the one to respond, and with tact, as you did.

You did not disappoint :)

Ghosted by Knegative @ 11/22/2007 6:40 PM EST


Has anyone else noticed that, they’re REALLY shoving this “High School Musical” crap down everyones throats?

Ghosted by Tetsu Deinonychus @ 11/22/2007 7:01 PM EST


All of Matt’s parade articles makes me wish that Canada could celebrate Thanksgiving in November, also. Its nice to have all the colorful leaves in October for Thanksgiving, but Oct. already has Halloween, and November only has my birthday, which is not yet a national holiday.

Ghosted by Muppet Baby @ 11/22/2007 7:26 PM EST


So… is anyone else really, really bored today? We didn’t go anywhere, my mom just wants to sleep, dinner was over by 12:30, and the friends I usually IM constantly are all off celebrating. I spent most of my day playing SimCity. The original, ancient, boring one. Boo.

Bring on Christmas!

Ghosted by jazzy @ 11/22/2007 7:35 PM EST


Up with people makes me think of Hooray for Everything on the simpsons first thanksgiving ep.

They also appeared in “Selma’s Choice”, The duff Gardens episode. Speaking of which, doho, I don’t know if it aired by you, but my FOX channel aired “Bart Vs. Thanksgiving” just now. Even if I could just pop in the DVD, I’m too tired to do so.

Happy Turkey Day, all. That Tryptophan is starting to kick in, and no Charlie Brown Thanksgiving to make funnier. I guess I’ll just stick in the Garfield Thanksgiving DVD in instead, that’ll work.

And thanks to all who commented on the parade today. Like I said, slept through it and missed it. I wish I could’ve seen the Hello Kitty Balloon of Death appear.

But getting rid of the Big Bird Balloon?! Blasphemy, I say!!

Ghosted by Invader Norbert @ 11/22/2007 8:51 PM EST


George Michael is still alive. I was just paraphrasing (aka stealing) a Homer Simpson line about John Williams (who is also still alive). Didn’t mean to set off a firestorm of ill-will. :(

Ghosted by The Manimal @ 11/22/2007 8:52 PM EST


Sorry to double post but looks like Invader Norbert and I are on the same page (again) because I just watched BART VS. THANKSGIVING and now I am watching the Garfield T-Giving special while I bust out the Christmas decorations. Interesting.

Ghosted by The Manimal @ 11/22/2007 8:54 PM EST


G. Michael doesn’t even like girls, get over her already!

Ghosted by Matt @ 11/22/2007 9:40 PM EST


But like Jim Adkins does, so it all works out.

SRSLY.

Ghosted by Knegative @ 11/22/2007 9:50 PM EST


Happy Thanksgiving to everyone; thought you guys would appreciate this story:

So every year we go to my step-sister’s house for dinner. This year was like all others: usual family ’sitting around and trying to come up with stuff to say’ stuff. But this year, there was something different…disturbingly different.

See, each year we always have way too much food. I have lots of friends who don’t have a big family or their family is too far away so I pack up the leftovers and then deliver them around town. I’ve been doing it for almost 5 years on and off now. But for whatever reason, my step sister’s husband’s parents (wow, that grammer probably sucks) decided to inform me they didn’t like me taking the leftovers to other people. And they did it in a very bitchy way, right in front of my parents and everyone.

It’s not like I took everything. In fact, I waited until everyone packed up what they wanted and then took the literal scraps; things that were going to be thrown away anyway. But for some reason it was “wrong” in there eyes this year.

It didn’t piss me off or anything, it just made me feel like some people just do not get the reason for holidays….

Have a great rest of Turkey day, ya’ll!

Ghosted by Shaunfu @ 11/22/2007 10:16 PM EST


Is Wal Mart open on Thanksgiving?

Ghosted by DIEsal @ 11/22/2007 10:22 PM EST


Actually, I really was just wondering if he actually was dead ’cause I don’t watch much entertainment news. Sorry…:(

Shuanfu – screw ‘em. What you were doing was really nice, and I think you should keep it up.

Ghosted by Moony @ 11/22/2007 10:27 PM EST


So it sounds like I missed a cool Parade?

We got back about 3:30 and I got home about 5:30 and lit a fire in the fireplace and started getting out the Christmas decorations. I’ve just spent the last hour pretending I’m eight years old, sitting on the floor near the fire and playing NES. Hell yes…

And tomorrow I can start listening to the 12 hours of Christmas music I have…

Ghosted by Cameron T. @ 11/23/2007 12:03 AM EST


My tree is decorated! Tomorrow we put out all the other decorations.

I am full of Christmas cheer and cranberry Sierra Mist.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Ghosted by jazzy @ 11/23/2007 12:07 AM EST


Thanksgiving was good but kind of uneventful, good food, football and sleep (along with garfield thanksgiving. We then went to see Hitman and came back for turkey sandwitches. Over all not a bad first married Thanksgiving.

Ghosted by thejyav @ 11/23/2007 12:30 AM EST


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