X-Entertainment's Christmas Season & Advent Calendar, 2008.

11/15/2007: Top Drawer Stocking Stuffers.

Around two weeks ago, I wrote up this blog post, covering some of the cheapo, generic stocking stuffer toys that permeate the Christmas sections in most of the country’s department stores. While bendable Santa Claus figures and novelty coal aren’t without their place in the world, it’s just as true that very few kids would respond to receiving such items with anything more than a faint giggle.

Fortunately, most of the major toy companies have developed stocking stuffers with some added oompf. They’re more expensive, but pretty much everything on the planet is more expensive than a crude, bendable Santa Claus figurine forged in a country nobody has ever heard of.

Basically, what toy companies do is take items from their most popular lines and shrink ‘em down to stocking stuffer size, usually in holiday-themed packaging. It’s a fairly new trend and not one that I had the pleasure of growing up with. Previously, the big issue with filling a Christmas stocking was finding anything that could actually fit in it. For that endeavor, these toys go a long way.

Adorably packaged and actually quite nice for toys so small, the toys shown above all hover around the $5 range. Not exactly “cheap” for what they are, but if you’re going to go through the trouble of stuffing a fuzzy sock, you might as well do it with something the recipient can be happy about. Click “more” for a closer look!

Miniature Tranformers Movie Figures (Click here to see it unpackaged!)
Though lacking in any kind of holiday-themed packaging, I’m taking these figures’ inclusion in Target’s stocking stuffer section to mean that that’s what they’re for. They’re kind of like what you’d expect a McDonald’s Happy Meal Transformers toy to be like, only they’re far more detailed and badass than anything that we’d get for free.

I only saw Starscream and Megatron on the rack, but it’s safe to assume that the micro collection includes a few of the good guys, too. I chose Starscream, mainly because he affords me the only opportunity in X-E history to make a reference to football: Starscream’s impossibly thick torso makes him look like some kind of robot linebacker.

The miniature figures’ transformations are obviously dumbed down from the intricate nature of the full-sized originals, but they work well enough. Knowing full well from my days spent with Cliffjumper and Ravage that there’s nothing better than owning Transformers that can fit in your pocket, these are great little extras that’d make any kid’s Christmas morning 2% sweeter.

Hot Wheels Holiday Hot Rods (Click here to see them unpackaged!)
Hot Wheels cars were used to stuff stockings long before Mattel ever decided to market them as such. It was pretty much a given that every small boy’s stocking would include at least one Hot Wheels car, for reasons I talked about in this entry’s intro. Not everyone had one of those gigantically oversized novelty stockings. Most of us had the standard-sized ones. Hot Wheels cars were among the very few popular, recognizable toys that could fit inside stockings. It didn’t hurt that they retailed for under a buck.

The boxed Holiday Hot Rods sets include three cars each, all with a metallic sheen, and all with negotiably holiday-themed color schemes. I believe there are four different three-packs available; I went with this one because the middle car looked like something out of Tron. Actually, that’s a lie. I just liked the red tinted windows on the bottom car. It doesn’t make for a great pop reference, but it’s the truth.

See ‘n Say Junior (Click here to see it unpackaged!)
We’ve all played with a See ‘n Say toy at some point (or something similar under a different name), and here, they’ve turned the classic, talking wheely things into perfectly-sized stocking stuffers. Merging the See ‘n Say with random children’s television characters to form cute-but-freaky mutants, this particular version features Elmo in all of his falsetto glory, happily singing one of four short tunes depending on where you move his chest arrow to.

I don’t normally cover preschool toys on the site, because I can’t bring myself to cater to a demographic that’s just as prone to eat their toys as they are to play with them. Still, if you’re in charge of stuffing the sock of someone woefully young, See ‘n Say Junior is an excellent choice.

Phlat Ball Jr. (Click here to see it unpackaged!)
I’m a little out of the loop when it comes to Phlat Balls, but if this miniature version is any indication, I’ve got a pretty good idea of how they work. You start off by squishing the ball down into a frisbee-shape. There’s a spring and suction cups inside, so it will hold this shape for an undetermined length of time before popping back into a ball. It’s basically a game of hot potato: You’re supposed to take turns tossing it back and forth with your buddies, and the person who has it in their hands when it pops back into a ball-shape loses.

That’s a pretty shitty game, so I assume that most kids who own Phlat Balls have figured out other, cooler things to do with them. To help sell the toys as holiday stocking stuffers, the junior-sized versions come in two color schemes: Red with green trim, and green with red trim. I picked green, because cash rules everything around me.

Since I try to maintain a $20 spending cap for blog posts, I’ll have show you the rest of this year’s coolest stocking stuffers on another day. Which sucks, because I want to write about Christmas-colored Play-Doh right now.

Please te me that the transformation doesn’t include removing the translucent (okay, white!) parts.

Yeah, the arms are a little off when you turn him into a jet. I can’t tell — the pictorial transformation instructions on the back of the package are really confusing.

Matt, Phlat Balls are great for scaring the shit out of cats. Cats sniff around it when it is flat and when it looses suction it pops back to ball form. It must make a sound from losing suction that only a cat can hear because my buddy’s cats couldn’t get enough of that thing. And every time it sprung back to shape they would lose their minds. That mindless entertainment made me miss having a cat.

I love the idea of a miniature Speak ‘n’ Say ‘n’ Spin ‘n’ Speak ‘r Whatever.
Too bad I hate Elmo with a passion. How did that little fucker take over Sesame Street the way he did? When I was comin’ up, it was all about Big Bird and Cookie Monster. Bert and Ernie to a somewhat lesser degree.

Great entry! I remember mostly getting candy and trial-sized toiletries in my stocking! These are great and I might just get a Phlat ball for my cats!

Lol Bill… I have 4 cats and a dog that thinks she’s a cat.. where can i get me one of these in Canuckland… oh and Greg, skipped out on sobey’s last night, heading there tonight instead… will look for pop tarts.. lol

dood, those hotwheels are RAD.
I used to play with hotwheels like MAD when I was little.
As for the phlat ball… I dunno, looks like something my dog destroy in mere moments.
Not to mention one of my cats is a scaredy little puss, if that thing go’s and springs on her, I’ll have to peel her off of the ceiling.

Christmas colored Play-Doh? Ooooo, even though this blog is fresh out of the oven, I can’t wait to read about the Play-Doh. I love Play-Doh, I haven’t touched it in several years. I can smell it now.

You like football, Matt? Or you just making sure all references are covered? If you are, I just never knew you were into the sport.

Nice entry, though. This came at the right time as my co-workers and I are all discussing our office Thanksgiving feast and that alone was enough to boost my Christmas Spirit Power by +2 points. This article (mainly the anticipation for Christmas Play Doh coverage) has bumped it up another +1.

If there was a real sized version of that green car, I would so totally buy/steal one. The silver one looks cool too, but the red one… eh.

My stocking stuffers are usually candy (which is always nice), Pez dispensers, and Rubick’s Cube-esque “toys.” Since I’m not some math/physics/black magic wizard, the latter usually found their way into the dark depths of my closet.

these toys are all really cool, i wish i had a smaller kid to buy for. i only have two kids to pick up something for- a one year old and an eighth grader.

the one year old is easy, something stupid with spongebob or snoopy on it (since i like them and he’s one so what does he care). but does anyone have any suggestions as to what to get an eighth grader?

(he’s my brother, but all i know that he likes is video games). i can’t for the life of me remember what i would have wanted (although its probably pretty close to what i would want now- dvds and such). any help would be appreciated!

Oh, and that silver Hot Wheel looks like it would roll perfectly smooth across a table or desktop. I love the sound of a smooth rolling Hot Wheel.

cb: Judging from the many nephews I have around that age, I’d suggest a DVD box set from some weird show he’s into. My nephews are just falling into their South Park/Family Guy/ATHF phases, and the DVD season sets are pretty much all they want this year.

Well, if he’s into video games then he might like more games or accessories, or maybe something themed off his favorite video game(s). Like with me, Nintendo Monopoly, Nintendo Pepsi Bottle Caps, Nintendo figurines, I can’t get enough of ‘em. Not sure if he’s into that stuff or not, though.

So any update on waiterbot? Is he gonna die an untimely death of vlogging this christmas or can he hold out with robitussin.

anybody ever read the book that the Christmas story is based on? is it any good?

Also, along with [b]fistpittingnork[/b] i too would like to know if Matt’s a football fan. I never really pictured it, because, well, he never really mentioned it.

I’m not. I do think that an unused helmet would make for a great planter, though.

The Phlat Ball kind of looks like a chinese ninja throwing star in it’s flat form.

My stocking mainly contained candy with some small toy or something. Nothing like what’s in this blog entry.

My stockings (I still get one) usually are filled with everyday items like a fancy multi blade razor, shaving cream, boxers, socks, cologne, and a ziplock bag full of candy. I think it is cute that my Mom still goes through the trouble. At least she doesn’t wrap the socks and underwear anymore. That was always a let down as a kid.

pdac
Book the Christmas story is based on? You mean the Bible? Yeah, it’s a good read. I’m partial to it. Topped the best seller list since movable type.

Crap. My inability to correctly do html has wrought havoc! My once semi-humorous joke is now bolded for no good reason!

I know the feeling Terror claws for some reason up above i thought XE was UBB not HTML. The memory did not serve me well on that moment.

And today i asked a question and learned and answer. Matt is not a football fan. Now i know. Although i bet santa’s wooden leg he watches the superbowl.

Nice stoking fillers Matt!Your right there are autobots in that line,i have ratchet,bumblebee and a decepticon barricade from that micro line!
I know im gettin a 360 and halo 3 plus sum other stuff for xmas!

Oh and Hello from the UK!
Since i’ll probably spend all xmas on halo 3 and my b-day is on xmas eve so i wont see you guys after probably…So Merry early X-mas!

Sometime, when you have a chance, take a gander around the teen’s room. You might be surprised by what they have out in the open for freinds and family to see. If they have a collection of some kind (action figures, TransFormers, comic books, or the like) maybe some kind of display or organizer could work. Or he likes a certain game or game series, perhaps a guidebook, or an artbook from an import store might be right. Remembering what you got an liked at that age is always a step correct. And, if you can’t guess, then ask! You can’t go too far wrong that way.

I can’t stand football, I like sports, and I’ve tried to watch it (NFL and NCAA) and I just can’t get interested in it.

I only asked because I was worried about a slightly more footbally X-E holiday season. I will, however, like to see your plant if you ever decide to follow your dreams.

Looks like a new trailer for Cloverfield is gonna hit this weekend- but I still think the perfect way to reveal the monster would be with a life-sized balloon of it in this year’s thanksgiving parade…

The Transformer is awesome…and the fact that it actually transforms is pretty rad, too. (You think I’m kidding? I was in a bad mood, and wanted to buy some Transformers toys, but the only ones they had DID NOT TRANSFORM. This did not improve my mood.)

Sadly, all I usually get in my stocking is chapstick, a finger puppet, and candy…still kind of fun, but nowhere near the amount of joy I would receive from a miniature Decepticon in my stocking! (But it’s still 8 days till I’m even allowed to start getting excited for Christmas.)

I don’t think anyone has seriously responded to this yet, but even if they have, “A Christmas Story” is based on an anecdote from a memoir of his childhood by Jean Shepard - “In God We Trust - All Others Pay Cash”. I actually read this book in high school, about two years before the movie came out.

I wonder if my mother will be filling my stocking this year or not. Sometimes she does, sometimes she doesn’t. It’s always fun, but in recent years she just crams in small-sized “regular” gifts. Which is still fun, but not the same as trading cards and stickers!

Sorry, but the previous post about Jean Shepard’s book is from me. I used to love getting a full stocking with stocking-sized toys like Matchbox cars, back when they were real quality miniature car replicas, not like today when the ones I buy for the nephews are all cheap, made in China junk.

Matt… thanks to you I really am pumped for Christmas…… thanks for the constant updates!

My own family doesn’t do stockings, but Rudy’s family does. And BOY, do they do.
The point is get them completely absurd stuff.
As in- completely useless after christmas day, but kills time waiting for midnight on christmas eve.
One year we put in party favors like kiddie rings and those cheap ass $1 sunglasses, and weapons that made noise when you swing them.
I spent all night swinging my “Sting” knockoff and sporting lime-green glasses I could barely see out off.
Ohh man, I can’t WAIT to go stocking stuffer shopping!

I’d much rather have my eardrums gorge out than deal with that See ‘n Say Junior. Do they have a Big Bird one instead?

Very nice entry, Matt. I’m so looking forward to Thanksgiving/Christmas this year. Your frequent updates are getting me through an otherwise painful work week. Thanks!

Shame I already covered both my little nephew and my baby cousin - they’d love everything there. Both sides of the family do stocking stuffers. Stocking presents ranged from childhood Hot Wheels (girls and boys got them - my brother actually got some of his from his sisters) to CDs and fancy lip gloss for teenagers to computer disks, huge pens, and DVDs for college students.

I’m not exactly sure if I’m looking forward to this holiday season. Sure, I still love shopping and decorating and everything, but I guess I feel a little left out. Being single with no significant other, I usually find myself going over to someone else’s house, which means I have to wedge myself into other people’s holiday plans.

I’m pretty good with anagrams, and I was able to get “X-Men Tent Retina” from “X-Entertainment.” It’s not much, but it uses all the letters (and the hyphen) to make real words.

As for the stocking stuffers, I’ve always loved Hot Wheels cars not based on real car designs. That green future-car is wonderfully awesome.

I bought Carnival Games for the Wii, its going to be my daughters stocking stuffer.

starwenn: That sucks. When you say you go to others’ houses, does that mean your family, or your friends? We should totally run virtual parties on the blog during holidays for the poor souls who don’t like their other options.

Der Super: I think “X-Men Tent Retina” has potential to be the next “giant ape juice.”

We had stockings but we didn’t put anything in them. Keeping them up with thumbtacks was hard enough without anything in them, putting a hot wheel car in there surely would have tripled the amount of frustrating “it fell down again” moments.

I love stocking stuffers! They were a total life saver when I was kid - when I woke up at like 5:00am and the parents weren’t going to be getting up for a good three or four more hours, I could sit and open my stocking. I’m pretty sure it was just candy and some wrapped toiletries (the usual chapstick, toothbrush, mini-toothpaste, etc.) but I had a great time opening it anyway. Strangely enough, the only time I got stickers for Christmas was when I was 15. Hmmm…I think my Christmas-related amnensia is starting to wear off. That would be really great!

Oh yeah. X-MEN TENT RETINA X-MEN TENT RETINA X-MEN TENT RETINA X-MEN TENT RETINA X-MEN TENT RETINA X-MEN TENT RETINA X-MEN TENT RETINA.

Oh, and dohopoki - we just leaned ours up against the entertainment centre. My family gave up on hanging stockings before I was even born.

A miniature Speak and Spell…wow.. Back when I was a kid the thing was half the size I was (might be exaggerating on that one, it’s been a while) and had a pullstring. Wake me up when they bring out the pocket sized speak and spell though. That toy was awesome when I was a kid. I liked to pretend it was the computer from Wargames, lol.

After reading Matt’s earlier column about the Christmas Wish List books - I think one of my wishes is coming true. I just found out that an official Ghostbusters video game is in the works - with a script by some of the original movie writers and featuring the original voices of the original actors. Click my name to see a pic of Stay Puft looking all video gamed up. Funny how as soon as I saw the news, I had to share with my fellow X-er’s. Awesome news and on the eve of my B-Day nonetheless….

HEY EVERYONE
Not sure if anyone else posted this but A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving will be on next Tuesday @ 8pm on ABC

Oh, I love shopping for stocking stuffers. It is so easy to spend so much so fast though.
I called up the family today to see what I was assigned for Thanksgiving Dinner this year. I GOT BREAD AGAIN! Dammit. These are going to be some fancy dinner rolls. No, screw it. I am buying bakery rolls then I am going to make a pie.

Even though the Play-doh people advise you to not do it, and that they’re non-toxic, people (kids, mostly) will still try to eat it.

They’re just screwing with us now that they have playsets that makes Play-Doh food AS WELL as the scented Play-Doh. All they need now is to make Pay-Doh that actually have flavors to them, like Christmas-themed flavors/smells like Gingerbread, Snow, Cinnamon, Pine Trees, and Dissappointment.

As for the Green Hot Wheels that’s in the 3-pack…that’s is a double-edged sword in my book. On one hand, it shows a lack of creativity that it just seems the Hot Wheels people just stick wheels onto discarded, unused pieces of die-cast and call them “Future Cars.”

On the other hand, at this point and with those designs, the Hot Wheels people are only 1 licensing agreement away from making How Wheels sized versions of the cars from the F-Zero games. Come on, wouldn’t that kick ass?

And every boy here wanted the Hot Wheels car that looked like a shark. I had it, and it was awesome.

Matt
Kotaku stole your Atari trayliner pic without crediting you. Click my name.

I’ll consider that bad karma back for swiping a bunch of turkey images from Google Image Search for use in the new Macy’s Parade article header earlier today.

I usually got cassette tapes/cds in my stocking, xmas candy like those cane shaped containers that hold hersheys kisses, novelty socks, paper back books, stickers, stationary, some smaller toys like my little ponies, jewelry, stuffed animals, etc

I still don’t get why the Starscream in the movie looks absolutely nothing like any Starscream I’ve ever seen. Damn that Micheal Bay! But yeah, I agree, some of my fave Transformers from back in the day were the smaller ones, like Huffer and Cliffjumper. Those were always a lot of fun to carry around and play with whenever you wanted.

Ben, the company I used to work for sold a knockoff version of the Rubik’s cube and I became obsessed with learning how to solve it. I went online and found some videos on YouTube that taught you how to solve it. I took 2 pages of notes and after practicing every day at work for 3 weeks I finally got it down to where I could do it without looking at the notes. Now, I’ve got it down to about 3 minutes. I’m a Rubik’s solving fool these days. It’s my one useless talent that can impress people at parties.

Daza, Well, happy very early birthday. Congrats on getting a 360. I’ve vowed that I’m going to get one for myself at the beginning of next year. There are just too many good games coming out now that I can’t pass up. Where are you in the UK? I lived in Middlesboro for 4 months back in ‘99 and would love to make my way back there sometime in the next couple of years. I miss it to death.

jjwspider, I was just reading that earlier tonight and was going to post something about it but you beat me to the punch. Man, I am SO jazzed about it! I’m glad they got Bill Murray back too, cause he kept saying he wasn’t interested in doing anything related to Ghostbusters again. I’m glad also that it’s going to kind of act as a sequel to the movies and pick up in the early 90’s where Ghostbusters 2 left off.

I always seem to get the same sorts of things in my stocking every since I was a kid. It’s always batteries, Hershey’s miniatures, and socks. Never fails.

Alright, so someone’s going to have to fill me in on something that I’ve wondered about for a while. Where does “giant ape juice” come from and what does it mean? Being a relatively new X-E’er I’m still getting caught up on all the lingo. If someone could fill me in I’d appreciate it. Also, what’s the deal with Photog? What’s that?

Man, after I went to the trouble of finding all those Giant Ape Juice cites for the Wiki page, people still don’t know the deal?
Just kidding, DJ D

Check out the Wikipedia, you’ll find out all about Photog as well.

starwenn, I know how you feel. It’s tough when everything around you seems designed to remind you that it’s that tiiiiime of year (when the world falls in love). Even my new YouTube account is mocking me: “You have no Friends.”

I’m also hoping that you get to Christmas ornaments this year. Shit, I’d put our lineup of “ornaments that look like stuff” (cats, football pads, owls, A COOKING SANTA) up against any other store’s lame colored balls. On either side of the Christmas tree flat at any Target is some ornament hotness. Totally blog-worthy.

Come to think about it, how about a fondly-remembered ornament article? ‘Cause, really, the tinsel and lights are pretty window dressing.

Anyone else have fond memories of the McDonalds Christmas Muppets or the American Tail stockings? I really disliked the movie but still have one of the Fivel stockings from ages ago.

Toys!! I love cheap toys, my room is full of cheap plastic figures!
I’m starting to think that cheap plastic comes with a dangerous chemical that makes people addicted to it.

Family, Matt; none of my close friends live in the area. I’m hoping Christmas won’t be quite so bad this year; I’m going to try to get down to my mom and stepdad’s house, probably the last time I’ll see them before they move into the house they bought. It’s only about 10 minutes from their old one, but they’ve lived in the same house for 12 years, a record for them, and it’s going to be hard for me to think of them being somewhere else.

squee4242, Thanks loads. The Wiki page looks great. I actually remember reading the Photog article a long time ago shortly after I first started coming to the site and thought it was really great, but totally forgot the name of the character. I had no idea that it spawned such an extensive conversation that people actually tried to track down that kid. Man, I jumped into X-E about a year or so too late. I missed out on Photog, the grape juice thing, and the whole thing about not wanting to think about chicken when I’m eating Doritos. I still say we bring that challenge back. Just for the newbies. Seriously.

I’m spending Thanksgiving the way I’ve wanted to since the first day I got my own apartment:

Granted, the Macy’s Parade will be on TV with the Detroit parade in PiP while I play World of Warcrack, but the scent of the turkey we plopped in the oven at 6am will be sure to make it the non-hectic, non-pressure holiday I’ve never had before.

Are you as pumped and slightly concerned about the new Wu-Tang album that is coming out, Matt? I wonder how many audio snippets of O.D.B. they will use. He will be the new Tupac with new releases well after his death.

I get stocking overload every year. The problem is, most of what I get I don’t want. I don’t have a sweet tooth. I like very specific candies, but I don’t really enjoy candy in general. Every Christmas, my father-in-law and mother-in-law each give me craploads of cheap candy. I still have most of it from last year. It’s like tradition for me to throw out the previous year’s candy to make way for the new. Plus, my father-in-law likes to supplement the stockings with party favors and dollar-store stuffed toys. I appreciate the sentiment, but I’m pushing 30. What the heck am I supposed to do with a cheap teddy bear in a santa hat? I can’t help thinking it’s a colossal waste of money. My husband does a stocking for me too, but he knows what I like so he does it right. I always fill the bottom of his stocking with those tiny Tabasco bottles so he can always have Tabsco wherever we go. I think that’s one of his favorite gifts. I always buy more than actually end up in his stocking, because it’s his original stocking (in other words, tiny), plus the weight always sends it careening to the floor within days.

Fellow X-E’ers - Do you open your stockings at Christmas or on St. Nicholas day? We always did St Nicks day when I was growing up so we got them early in the season which was good and bad I suppose. We haven’t set a steadfast rule for my daughter yet so I am wondering what the general population does so I can make my decision for this year.

Cricket, I’ve always waited till Christmas morning to open anything, mostly because I just wasn’t allowed to till then when I was growing up, and the tradition just kind of stuck. Now I always wait so I can maximize my Christmas morning haul. I want to get the most out of that morning as I can so I don’t want to dip into it early. However, it is a fairly popular tradition to open one gift or just the stocking on Christmas Eve, the night before. I know a lot of people that do that.

Someone gave my 5 yr old neph one of those phlat balls. It took us adults all of 5 min to realize it pops back into a ball after you peg someone in the back of the head with it. Not like we did it…often. Fine, everyone got smacked with it.

Ann, Ha! I’ve been feeling like crap today cause of lack of sleep and stress and such, but that made my day.

I’m fortunate enough to work in an office that’s so laid back that on the weekends people are allowed to bring their dogs in and have them run around. We’ve got some toys there that we use to entertain the dogs (and ourselves) with. That sounds like something that would happen in my office. Just today I got pegged in the back of the head with a tennis ball like 3 times.

Cricket, if you happen to still be reading this thread, I’ll share my husband’s stocking tradition with you. I like it, so we’re planning on it for our future little ones. When the kids went to sleep on Christmas Eve, the parents snuck in and laid their full stockings at the foot of their beds. That way, when the kids woke up, they had the stockings right there ready for them to tear into and the parents got to sleep a little longer.

Does anyone else think that “X-Men Tent Retina” is gonna become the new Giant Ape Juice?

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