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My dying wish is for an owl/camel hybrid, which I call camowl.

Waxing About Christmas Wish Books: 1985 Editon.

Wow, this one took forever to put together. I know the topic of Sears Wish Books came up a few threads ago, and I had to bite my virtual tongue to avoid mentioning that they were going to be the topic of the next full-length article. So, here we are: The newest article covers six things I had and six things I always wanted from the 1985 Sears Wish Book, only that's a lie, since the photos are actually from the '85 JCPenney catalog. Same difference, really.

I'm pretty certain that this will be a recurring feature, and I'm already chomping at the bit to dive into one of my catalogs from the early '90s. Will probably do at least one more of these before the season goes kaput.

One of the featured items in the '85 catalog review is the "Million Color Drawing Set" from Clowny, the second most awesome crayon company in history. I didn't get one back in 1985, but the set is important proof that no amount of time can end our chances of finally snatching the toys that "got away." Thanks to good timing at a church fair sometime back, I now stand before you as the proud owner of what simply must be the last remaining Clowny "Million Color Drawing Set" in existence.


For those who don't recall (or who weren't alive), the basic gimmick with Clowny crayons was that most of them weren't a single color, but rather a messy soup of dozens of colors. When you used the crayons, your line might've started off red before changing into yellow and finishing green. This didn't make them practical for use with coloring books, but with crayons this wild, who wanted to paint within the lines?

The "Million Color Drawing Set" included three different types of Clowny crayons and a gigantic drawing pad. Now that I've seen the set, I can confirm that the drawing pad was only gigantic so they'd be able to justifiably use a box that made the set appear to be much larger than it actually was. Take away the pad, and they could've fit the remaining contents into even the smallest Ziploc.


The main stars of the show were the Million Color Stick and the Million Color Block. The former works like lipstick tube, while the latter is kind of neanderthalic and simple, but in a good way. I haven't held a Clowny crayon in my hand for over twenty years, and what's really hitting me most is the smell. Oh, that wonderful smell! Like stale clay mixed with construction paper, it's just behind gasoline and coconuts as my favorite smell ever.

Also included with the set were ten Color Finger Tips, which let you doodle in crayon much in the same way that you would fingerpaint. I prefer the other versions, since Clowny crayons don't feel like rightful Clowny crayons if they don't look like the remnants of a Crayola 64-count box set ablaze.

My personal triumph in finally finding Clowny again notwithstanding, the years I spent praying for that triumph seems like a good segue into a survey. I'm sure we've done this survey before, but there must be some kind of reasonable statute of limitations when it comes to online surveys. In the comments, talk about some of the toys and other childhood items you always wanted, but never got.

Posted by Matt on 11/13/2007. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 273 comments

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The one great toy that eluded me was the Eternia playset! That was one toy that I made sure to tell my parents about time and time again, but I still didn’t get it. I guess I can’t be too disappointed though, because not many other kids got it either, and I was pretty lucky anyways.

On a side note – Matt, I have seen the USS Flagg out of the box, and it was great! As a kid, my rich neighbors had it, and their attic was pretty much their whole play area. At 7.5 feet, it was huge, especially then, but they had plenty of room for it. They had a yard sale and moved not long after, but by the time I went the Flagg had been sold. I ended up buying Serpentor and his chariot, and a mess of Flag Points that you could use to buy other Joe gear. One of them was the 4-POINT flag point that came with the Flagg! I still have it to this day.

Chestnuts roasted by Jordan @ 11/13/2007 4:46 PM


Squee

Well good luck if you decide to make the venture!

Now to actually contribute to the topic at hand here. My parents still have a lot of JCPenny, Sears, Service Merchandise, and other 5 lb catalogs laying around some where, some still with notes and dogears, tags, or anyt other sort of emprovised page marker. One is a 1985 or 1987 Sears book with a picture cut out of one of the pages.

The picture was from the underwear section and it was of 2 or 3 little girls in panties. Now before you guys start thinking the wrong things here, it was for a joke gift from my younger brother and I for our youngest brother. He wanted “hot chicks” for Christmas, as mentioned on his list for my parents, so we gave him hot chicks. He was about 12, they probably would’ve been about 10, though the catalog was printed at least 10-12 years before we clipped the photo out, so the hot chicks were totally 80s.

My brothers and I, despite most of the catalogs containing the same exact items, would be just as eager to flip through the last catalog as we were the first. We would make sure we listed everything we wanted, including page numbers and which catalog they were found in, and then we would polish up our rough draft list, taking off stuff that sounded good at the moment but crappy now, or things we knew we weren’t going to get, leaving one fantastic final copy that absolutely cannot be denied.

If only I put as much effort into researching and writing for my Lit classes in HS and college.

I remember there was this one gift that I wanted more than any other gift (from any Christmas) and walking into the living room Christmas morning and seeing it sitting there waiting on me. That gift was a Twin Turbo Trains track set. It was set up before I finished opening all my presents.

Chestnuts roasted by fistpittingnork @ 11/13/2007 5:02 PM


I finally read the Wishbook article and it was awesome, of course. I also had that crayon kit and a tan Pound Puppy named Buttetscotch. Only mine came with a dogtag that had his name and mine on it. I slept with it for years.

Just like Matt wanted that robot but never got it due to the price, I also had something that I always wanted like that: A pinball machine. Didn’t/doesn’t matter which one, a pinball machine would rule. But those things are expensive, plus we have no room for one.

Matt’s brief mention of Pee-Wee’s Playhouse reminds me that I always wanted the action figures they had. Well mainly Conky and Jambi, just to see if I could get wishes and a secret word to scream. I don’t think I ever asked for it specifically, though, mainly because there were other toys I wanted more. You know how every kids drops an item from there list because there’s better stuff they wanted. This was the drop-off item for me.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 11/13/2007 5:03 PM


Old Jim: Fun chemistry fact: one of the chemicals in your “water to wine” experiment was almost certainly phenolphthalein, which also functions as a colorless, nearly tasteless, and horrifically powerful laxative. So it’s basically a tiny plastic vial filled with revenge.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 11/13/2007 5:08 PM


It took me a long time to remember something I wanted but didn’t get. I didn’t really ask for a lot because most of what I desired as a child simply didn’t exist. Like a gun that shot knives.

I did finally remember, at the mention of lazer tag, that I wanted something similar really badly but my mother flat-out said no to it. It had bright green guns with camo print and a headpiece that vibrated when you got shot.
I don’t remember the name. I think it had the word “survive” or some variation thereof in it.

Chestnuts roasted by Somethin' Funny @ 11/13/2007 5:12 PM


Sorry, I hit Post instead of Preview.

Continuing on….

I still remember the smell of those trains, I miss that set.

One gift I loved, but never asked for, was given to me for Christmas in the late 80s. It was a cassette tape recorder. I didn’t appreciate it then as much as I do now, but I have a box full of cassette tapes with the most random things recorded from the late 80s up until somewhere in the mid 90s.

Some of the best recordings were of me and my brothers and friends pretending we’re news reporters interviewing eachother about [you name it].

We were filthy mouthed little hellbeasts, one interview was my younger brother and I. He was interviewing me about my alien encounter. Well, I was telling him about how the aliens pushed me down on my bike and starting sucking my… yeah.. but something with the tape had messed up during the recording so when played back it sounded like “pushed me down on my bike and started sdick” (ucking my was cut out). For some reason thats one of my favorite tapes out of the entire box.

Sorry to just go on and on about crap you guys probably don’t care about, all at the same time I’ve probably made myself out to be some weird alien sex having paedophile.

Fantastic.

Chestnuts roasted by fistpittingnork @ 11/13/2007 5:14 PM


The best gift I never asked for was probably three X-Men action figures. It was about a year before the animated series, so I hadn’t really heard of them, but I thought the toys were awesome.

I got Magneto, Storm and Wolverine, and not only were they the coolest gifts that year, but they were the start of an obsession with the ToyBiz X-Men line that lasted until I was about 12.

Which benefited me because by the time all the other kids I knew got into the X-Men, I already had the coolest collection of action figures.

Chestnuts roasted by Somethin' Funny @ 11/13/2007 5:22 PM


Bill i just read your blog about your uncle matt, and i have decided that it is my new goal in life to own a watch that calls me an asshole on the hour. also, is that the flea market in daytona? my mom and grandma made me go with them the last time i went to florida and i half loved it and half wanted to kill myself.

Chestnuts roasted by Leigha @ 11/13/2007 5:25 PM


One thing I never understood about all those X-men action figures is why they were always packaged with machine guns and other such weapons they never used in the comics. I can buy Wolverine with a machine gun or sword, but Magneto with a laser gun I never got.

Chestnuts roasted by Somethin' Funny @ 11/13/2007 5:27 PM


I always wanted that USS Flagg playset. I don’t even think I knew the name of it as a child, I just knew it was a huge aircraft carrier to stage my G.I.Joe battles on. I did get the Terror Dome though, which doubled as my Technodrome since I never got that toy, and pretty much any villains all had that. I was fortunate enough back in high school to get my hands on the remake metal Voltron, which I still have to this day albeit one of the legs is missing. I should’ve kept that one in the box but it was just way too awesome to keep sealed.

Chestnuts roasted by Reel American Hero @ 11/13/2007 5:39 PM


My best friend had a USS Flagg playset and just about every other G.I.Joe from my era. I was so jealous. Anyhow, I just searched for it, and although I live in CO, this could be cool for any of you wistfull L.A. folks, http://cgi.ebay.com/GI-Joe-USS-FLAGG-Aircraft-Carrier-Amazing-NO-RESERVE_W0QQitemZ260180820053QQihZ016QQcategoryZ2468QQcmdZViewItem#ebayphotohosting.

Chestnuts roasted by Pete @ 11/13/2007 5:48 PM


I used to have both the Lion and Team Voltron’s back in the day, wish I knew what I did with them. As far as toys I wanted and never got…Castle Greyskull. I loved the MOTU figures and used to pine for either it or Snake Mountain but never got either.

Chestnuts roasted by Dan H @ 11/13/2007 5:56 PM


Here at work, I have access to a heat gun. I might just have to experiment and make myself my own million color crayon. In the category of toy that one has no right to want now, but will get anyway, I might buy myself that Crayola light-up board jus so I can make my own version of the neon sign from “Porky’s.”

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 11/13/2007 5:58 PM


Wow.. back in my day, the big line was Jurassic Park… the first line with the big T-Rex… Good times…

Chestnuts roasted by Trike @ 11/13/2007 6:09 PM


When I was younger, I forget the exact year but we’ll say mid 90′s, I wanted that set that let you build your own monster face. It was called “Freaky Face” or something stupid like that, but it was basically a dummy head and a million monsters ears, eyes, teeth, warts, scars, etc. that you could put together any way you wanted. God, I could almost TASTE that thing, I stared at it in catalogs everyday and bugged the shit out of my parents about it. So I was pumped when on Christmas morning there was a huge box I figured to be about the right size under the tree for me. I was sorely disappointed when it proved to be a Tonka dump struck. Not that a Tonka dump truck wasn’t cool, but when you’re jonesin’ for a monster face to put fake zits all over, it’s just not the same.

Chestnuts roasted by Black Zarak @ 11/13/2007 6:17 PM


Kind of along the lines of Christmas, here’s an article on weird Japanese toys.

Chestnuts roasted by Dan H @ 11/13/2007 6:17 PM


I don’t remember the Sears or J.C. Penny books but I do remember Consumers. I remember one Hannukah where my grandmother practically raided Toys R Us’ She-ra aisle for my sister and I. We got the Crystal Castle too. I’m not sure if that was 85 though. Maybe it was Rose Petal Place if not. And of course there always was the Barbies. 1985..Maybe Barbie and the Rockers?

Funny that I can’t remember years but I can remember toy lines.

Chestnuts roasted by Angelcake @ 11/13/2007 6:40 PM


I feel like such a spoiled little bitch. I had nearly all of the featured Wishbook gems.

The Optimus Prime tent was awesome as a playhouse, but, because I was a hypochondriac, I’d take it off my bed at night for fear it might suffocate me in my sleep. More than meets the eye indeed.

I had the black Voltron and my brother had the blue one. Our neighbor, Josh, had the red one. This left us with a torso, one arm and a leg. Not much fun, but better than Barbie. I guess I needed more friends.

Did anyone have the complete Voltron set?

Chestnuts roasted by undeadhead @ 11/13/2007 6:42 PM


The Power Wheels electric cars always eluded me as a kid. The commercial where the kid is driving the jeep version through the woods had me drooling.

Chestnuts roasted by KJX @ 11/13/2007 6:49 PM


Hmm… I don’t know if I can think of anything specific that I got but didn’t ask for. Not because I never GOT any such things, but because I didn’t make detailed wish lists as a child. Instead I just watched TV with my mom in the room and when I saw a commercial for a toy I wanted, I’d just blurt out “I want that!!” Consequently, by Christmas I had totally forgotten what I had asked for, so everything was a surprise.

Overall I think my most-loved gifts were all my various Nintendo systems (every game console I’ve ever had was obtained as a Christmas gift), a Super Mario electronic pinball machine, and a unicorn lamp that I got when I was like three.

However I think the gift that impressed me the most was a fancy, old-fashioned baby carriage for my baby dolls. Now, as I’ve said before I was never too much of a girly girl. But this gift was special because it was from Santa himself. See, in my family the presents were always under the tree well before Christmas, and were from my parents. Santa merely came and filled my stocking. But this carriage was different, because it was by the tree fully assembled and unwrapped on Christmas morning. Finally I had a toy left from Santa on Christmas morning, like those kids on TV! In your face, space coyote!

And how did I make use of this carriage? The same way little girls all over the world use baby carriages, of course. I shoved my cats in there and insisted they “be the baby”. I got a lot of scratches that way.

Chestnuts roasted by jazzy @ 11/13/2007 6:52 PM


I wanted that damn colorful unicorn from Rainbow Brite. And the BIG one. I had a little one, but I had the BIG rainbow brite, so that little unicorn was useless. To this day, I still have a thing for horse toys- plastic ones, stuffed ones…
Like that FurReal pony they have out this season- ooh, I want that like nobody’s bizniz.

Chestnuts roasted by kittymao @ 11/13/2007 6:54 PM


Does anyone remember Dolgin’s, or was that just a regional store? Their catalogs are the ones I remember the most, although they were very similar to Sears and JCPenney. Used to have a few of them from the 80′s but I think I got rid of them years ago.

Like many others here, the Lion Voltron was what I wanted but never got. I got a small version of the vehicle Voltron for Christmas one year. You couldn’t separate it into its various components, but it was still nice to have. I remember my parents saying it was almost impossible to find.

I also would have liked to get some of the more well known Transformers. I usually got the knockoff kinds that you’d find at Target or the occasional GoBot (I admit I did like Leader-1.) When I did get a Transformer, it was usually a very obscure one. I think I got a couple of the Protectabots one Christmas.

Chestnuts roasted by Eric @ 11/13/2007 6:57 PM


mandy_Reeves you are right and therefore my hero. Now that I am able to do a little Googling with the correct name I see they were made by Axlon, makers of Petster(? the robot cat) and AG Bear. Now all I have to do is try to track down a mosquito of my own!

Chestnuts roasted by kbbaker @ 11/13/2007 7:01 PM


Even though I was a child of the 90′s, I absolutely love 80′s toys and love it even more when you write about them, Matt. Can’t wait to see what the upcoming weeks bring, but here’s hoping more toys from that era!

Also, the X-E Advent calender.

Chestnuts roasted by RageTreb @ 11/13/2007 7:23 PM


I remember i always wanted one of those fisher price plastic clubhouses. Remember those, in fact when I was a kid I always just wanted a club house of some sort, in a tree a big walking closet just some place that I could call my own. I vow in front of all the other X-readers that if my kids ever ask for a plastic fisher price club house Ill be giving them one of those!

Chestnuts roasted by mjgrass @ 11/13/2007 7:41 PM


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