Sorry I haven't been around for a week...it's been a really lousy month.
Remember Gizmo's reaction when the malfunctioning water fountain sprayed his head near the beginning of Gremlins 2? I've been doing that all month. Every five minutes. It's become a coping device. Like, I'll be at work, find out that a thousand bucks worth of tape has gone faulty, and instead of yelling...I do the Gizmo water fountain reaction. If I wake up in the morning and notice that my left eyelid has mysteriously swollen up to twice its normal size in an apparent effort to make me face the world as a monster, I don't cry...I just do the Gizmo water fountain reaction. These are all true stories, and I suggest that everyone give it a shot. Dunno where I'd be without the Gizmo water fountain reaction. Likely in a box.
I can't wait for August to be done with, because I've decided that the month is cursed.
And besides, we all know what September brings...the all-too-early and yet all-too-inviting start to the Halloween season. I've been trying to look the other way as every store in town starts filling their aisles, because I don't want to waste the glory of a New-For-2007 Halloween item when it's 100 fucking degrees outside. Shit like that calls for sweater weather, not sweat weather.
Still, try as I might, even with a swollen lid, I can't pry my eyes away from the holy unholy sights of things orange and black. Especially when they're edible and light-shining:
As a premise, "Lightning Pumpkins" is nothing new. I've seen the same gimmick on other candy sets, usually ones involving gummy bugs. The frightening fun involves picking up little pumpkin candies with a special tong featuring an inbuilt red light, which is powerful enough to beam through the gummies and create some kind of glowing alien pumpkin effect.
The packaging is extra special. It seems to have stolen a bunch of Halloween clipart from one of the few still-running 1998 Geocities sites that offered such things, with repeating images of the same angry ghost and the cutest little pumpkin patch ever put to plastic.
Admittedly, grabbing pumpkin candies with light-up tweezers gets old after a while, but it fulfills its promise of $1.39's worth of entertainment value. What's even more fun is using the tweezers on other, random items to see which are able to get a full shine-through.
Anyways, after a couple of days in the office next week, it looks like I'll be in the clear for a while. Just in time to scour Target for the latest bat-shaped snacks. Stay tuned, and happy SNT...if you're here.
Posted by Matt on 08/25/2007. E-mail me!
Chestnuts roasted by 
Cricket- Yes, usually that would be the case. However, the state allows one paid week off per year for in home day care centers. This is that week. She had planned on having one of her employees available for those who could not make other arraingements to use. The employee apparently flaked out on her, so I am just outta luck. Needless to day, I am already on the waiting list for another more responsible yet far more expensive daycare. But school starts soo, then I will only need before school care for a couple hours.
Also, I have the option to go to the courthouse and meet with a traffic officer to plea my case, which I will do. I’m just whining, sorry bout that.