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07/23/2007: Summer Megaparty: Make My Monsters Grow!

Sorry, yesterday was just one of those days, and I didn’t feel like making an entry just to say that. I’m also going to blitz through today’s entry, as I’ve stumbled onto enough material for a full-length article and want to get as much of it done this afternoon as possible.


Grow-In-Water toys have really evolved into something special in recent years, expanding in size, color and general awesomeness. Such toys were formerly mundane and almost always generic, but as you can see above, today’s options are limitless. Even in their small, original shapes, Humble Bumble and King Kong look so great that I’m halfway tempted to just leave them like that. After all, the exquisite detail work will certainly be diminished once I drop these fuckers in water to swell overnight.

On the other hand, both packages claim that the creatures will grow up to 600% larger if left to drench for 72 hours. Kong is already almost two inches tall, and the thought of owning a sopping wet, foot-long gorilla makes 72 hours sound like a lifetime. In Bumble’s case, I just want to see how his individually painted teeth and jarringly blue mouth look after a three-day swim.


There was more than a small part of me wanting to put Kong and Bumble in one single container, as such efforts would surely deliver some kind of mutant, hybrid, Brundlefly-esque monstrosity in the realm of outsider art. But I have far too much love for King Kong and Humble Bumble to subject them to such psychophysical torments.

Various dictionaries tell me that “psychophysical” means “the time required for the mind to transform a sensory impression into a motor impulse,” but since it’s just so obvious that it should really mean “affecting mind and body.” I’m hereby redefining the word and rallying the like-minded to my cause.

When my pals are done growing, I’ll show you the results. Meantime, you can grow (ha!) more acquainted with Grow-In-Water toys with my old review of the Gremlins Water Hatchers.


Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

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Discussion Thread: 112 comments

Hey, you can put these in two liters?! I never thought of that before. I can screw the lid on super tight so my son cannot open it and I can see just how big they get. YAY new fun.

Ghosted by kb @ 07/23/2007 11:42 PM EDT


Wow…I knew this was coming, i just didn’t know when. Corey Haim and Corey Feldman are back together again for a reality series on A&E starting next week. I wonder if Haim is going to talk about how he sold his teeth?

http://www.tmz.com/2007/07/19/coreys-fight-on-their-reality-show/

Ghosted by Bill @ 07/24/2007 12:07 AM EDT


Matt, I will proudly join you in redifining psychophysical. Let the revolution begin!

Ghosted by Shelby @ 07/24/2007 12:39 AM EDT


Haim is single? I find that hard to believe.

Ghosted by Knegative @ 07/24/2007 12:44 AM EDT


Bill If you couldn’t figure that out yourself it’s fake. It’s made to be a reality show it’s a comedy. Don’t remember the term they use but it’s like the word Mockumentary. I bet you could figure that out yourself but I don’t like the thought of people going around with false info in their heads.

And for some odd reason these put-in-water-2-watch-grow things remind me of a toy of tony the tiger I got in a box of frosted flakes he’s shaped as a bullet kinda and you put him in a bottle of water and with the cap on you squeezed and let go to watch him go up and down. Probably still have the lil guy.

Ghosted by Goob @ 07/24/2007 1:29 AM EDT


Don’t know if anyone here’s a Morrissey fan,but I just got back from a fine Morrissey performance. He missed the original date (2 weeks ago) but he had a makeup concert tonight and it was fantastic.

Ghosted by Kid Nicky @ 07/24/2007 1:56 AM EDT


The word they used in the article is “fauxality.”

Ghosted by Knegative @ 07/24/2007 2:19 AM EDT


I can just see Matt trying to imitate Power Ranger villains, shouting the thread’s title, and hurling pencils, soda straws, and Skeletor’s Havoc Staff at Kong and Bumble, trying to speed up the swelling.

I was just coming here to post just this, finally realizing this at 2:30am after a long day. Being away for the compy for most of the day helped too.

And Rita’s Wand Throwing was one of the better “Monster Growing” cut scenes. Zedd? He just gave his monsters grenades to make them grow.

Although after Rita & Zedd teamed up/got married, they crossed their staffs together to make it grow. So that was nice.

Ghosted by Invader Norbert @ 07/24/2007 2:25 AM EDT


Phew, I thought I was going to be the only one to get the Power Rangers reference when I first read this. It’s reminders like this that make me want to go back to 1993.

Ghosted by Boomstick @ 07/24/2007 2:43 AM EDT


It’s fitting that Invader Norbert should be talking about Rita and Zedd, because tonight they aired a brand-new two-parter on power rangers featuring Rita and Zedd’s son as the main villain. It’s a cross-over that brings in a group of rangers from past teams, including Adam as the black ranger. Anyone interested can watch part one on Disney DXD at jetix.tv.

Ghosted by Hoverbored @ 07/24/2007 2:44 AM EDT


Alright, it’s been breached. For those of you who can’t get enough of Juggernaut Bitch (I can’t be the only one), here’s Power Rangers Bitch

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yIeh7Q3pZrI

Ghosted by Knegative @ 07/24/2007 2:48 AM EDT


Kneg

Juggernaut Bitch 1 was much better than Juggernaut Bitch 2. Although the first 3 minutes of #2 were great.

“Under The Sea!”

“Oh Sh** is that a seal?!”

and so on.

That was a phenomenon with me & my frat bros last summer. I also saw the PR one. Also funy, but Juggernaut Bitch is still the one to watch.

As for “Once a Ranger…” I heard the end result was mostly a bad fanfic come to life. I don’t get Toon Disney either.

…Why PR would air on TOON Disney in the first place is beyond me.

Ghosted by Invader Norbert @ 07/24/2007 3:08 AM EDT


Juggernaut Bitch 2?!?!? I shall not rest until I have seen this.

Ghosted by Knegative @ 07/24/2007 3:16 AM EDT


Thanks Knegative someone had a link to their blog that posted here once that had a touching story about when they were a kid about 6 or 7 they loved power rangers and had a power rangers birthday party (the article showed pics of the party) and a foreign exchange student they had over for a year that lived with them gave him an early birthday present (because she was leaving before his birthday) of the red power ranger (his fave) on a bike. He was tickled at the effort on her part to buy him something power rangers related even though she had no clue about the whole show. If any of you wrote that article, I hope you enjoy my summary :) I was a bit old for the power rangers I was about 11 or 12 at the time, but I enjoyed watching it in all of it’s cheesy goodness. And it was a boy thing and I loved boy things being a tomboy.

Ghosted by Goob @ 07/24/2007 3:29 AM EDT


Touching story? Definitely not me :P

Ghosted by Knegative @ 07/24/2007 4:05 AM EDT


I cannot wait to get Monster Squad! I never saw it as a child, but my freinds constantly recounted it to me, I feel like i missed out on an intergral part of growing up. Finally, i can see the ‘nards shot in all it’s glory.

Ghosted by Dr Worm @ 07/24/2007 8:30 AM EDT


the thing i don’t get about spoilers is why movie reviewers these days feel the need to describe the entire plot of a movie to review it! there’s no need to reveal every plot twist just to convey your feelings on the quality of the direction, acting, effects, story, etc..

saw corey haim and feldman on larry king the other day and they oddly made it a point to state that their reality show pretty much all consisted of scripted or forced situations. i think we all know that these reality shows are fake by now but it still kinda takes some of the fun out of it when the people behind it openly say so

Ghosted by dallasmovie @ 07/24/2007 9:30 AM EDT


Goonies action figures! Goonies action figures!

http://www.mezcotoyz.com/products.asp?pline=goo-001

AWESOME.

Ghosted by Muppet Baby @ 07/24/2007 10:20 AM EDT


Goob: I think you are right. I just saw a snid bit on A&E. They were talking about the Lost Boys sequel and how they are not going to be in it.

Dr Worm: You should read the review of Monster Squad that Mystie did. It got kudos from one of the actors. I believe it is on Retro Junk.

Ghosted by Bill @ 07/24/2007 10:37 AM EDT


Drew Carey is the new host of “The Price is Right.” I like Drew so I think this is a good choice.

Ghosted by JLAJRC @ 07/24/2007 10:59 AM EDT


Yeah, I think Drew is a pretty good choice. I hope he invents a little touchdown dance to do whenever someone gets to turn a hole-in-one to a hole-in-two.

Ghosted by Matt @ 07/24/2007 11:19 AM EDT


My girlfriends Mom was on the Price Is Right. She bet closest and won a chair. Every time we go back to visit I have to sit in it and watch the Price Is Right. It just feels right.

Ghosted by Bill @ 07/24/2007 11:36 AM EDT


I’m a little disappointed with Drew as a choice. It wouldn’t have made good PR, I know, but I was hoping they’d go with an unknown. TPIR has been around for so long now that it doesn’t need someone to be a draw. I’m afraid that Drew will overpower the show instead of complementing it. I couldn’t stand him on “Whose Line…”. The prize was doing improv with him, and he was the worst one at it. I could be wrong about all this. I hope I am. I love TPIR. It was the best part about staying home sick from school.

Ghosted by Lori @ 07/24/2007 11:41 AM EDT


Does anybody have any info on that guy that tried to sue Saban all those years ago over MMPR? He tried to claim that he came up with the idea first. Had pictures of his “team” and everything. The photos were pathetic. Three word description of his “ranger” uniform: Spandex Doorman Nightmare. I heard mention of it a couple of times on Entertainment Tonight, then nothing. I pegged PR as adapted Japanese programming right off, so I wanted to know what happened when they hauled out the Sentai footage. One of the funniest lawsuits I ever heard of.

Ghosted by kingklash @ 07/24/2007 11:51 AM EDT


BILL! – You cryptic message sending son of a bitch. You know who fucking decided to rear his ugly head back into my life like hours after you send that message? My fucking ex with the Batman tattoo. And we almost immediately began quoting Batman Returns, after I got over the urges to punch him in the face. Ugh. As much as I hate the son of a bitch for what he’s done, it’s kinda hard to hit someone that just tried to off himself. Especially since I still harbor certain emotions for him. *sigh* I’m an emotional wreck right now. *shakes head*

Ghosted by Mystie @ 07/24/2007 11:56 AM EDT


I’m….sorry? I have a bad problem with jinxing people and myself. I think it was from an accidental electric shock I received when turning on a light with wet hands. Some superpower, huh?

Ghosted by Bill @ 07/24/2007 12:16 PM EDT


could be worse Bill you could have the power to make your hands swell up painfully whenever you take a bite of a sandwhich

Ghosted by Danny J @ 07/24/2007 12:25 PM EDT


Just great, now I want a sandwhich.

Ghosted by dohopoki @ 07/24/2007 12:47 PM EDT


Lol, it’s okay…. sadly I’m happy to have him back in my life. -_-;;

Ghosted by Mystie @ 07/24/2007 12:58 PM EDT


thank you, Muppet Baby!

I will be pre-ordering the entire line!

Ghosted by Shelby @ 07/24/2007 1:41 PM EDT


Shelby- N/P

Goonies action figures….that’s the type of thing credit cards were MADE for!!

I think Drew Carey is an ok choice…as long as he doesn’t make the show all about him, ya know?

I am eating a sandwich right now, people. Jealous?

Ghosted by Muppet Baby @ 07/24/2007 1:47 PM EDT


I thought Drew Carey already had a game show. It sort of bothers me really, he’s too broad and strong. I expect a bit of waifness and large teeth in my game show hosts. And there’s no way in hell that he’ll be able to carry off that scrawny microphone without looking like a pansy. Maybe the idea is that a contestant won’t be able to break *his* ribs while trying to lift him in celebration over their new appliances.

Ghosted by bloodybrilliantme @ 07/24/2007 2:48 PM EDT


Yeah, I’m really fucking jealous that Muppet Baby was eating a sandwhich over an hour ago because I still don’t fucking have one.

Ghosted by dohopoki @ 07/24/2007 2:53 PM EDT


Mmm…open faced club sandwich.

Ghosted by Homer @ 07/24/2007 3:00 PM EDT


I’m eating a magic sandwich.
HAMUS-CHEESEIOUS!!

Ghosted by HARRY POTTER @ 07/24/2007 3:40 PM EDT


RIP WWN. :(

http://tinyurl.com/ywwc85

Ghosted by JLAJRC @ 07/24/2007 4:46 PM EDT


i’m so excited for the new halloween movie (the one rob zombie is making) comes out next month!!!http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halloween_%282007_film%29

Ghosted by Andrew @ 07/24/2007 4:49 PM EDT


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halloween_%282007_film%29

Ghosted by pardon me pete. @ 07/24/2007 4:50 PM EDT


actually Andrew I heard Saturday night an interview with Rob Zombie talking about the movie, it sounds really good. He said he did research on what kids do the signs of a serial killer early on, and the details in the movie. He said they worked really hard trying to find the perfect young michael myers and how they didn’t want a fake hollywood one but a real down to earth child and how the kid they found was perfect. Immature kid sometimes, and a serious mature side too. Sounds awesome. And august 31st is my cousin’s b-day she’ll probably see that movie on her birthday.

Ghosted by Goob @ 07/24/2007 6:34 PM EDT


ahhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i can’t wait!! *head explodes*

Matt- whats you’re take on this?

Ghosted by Andrew @ 07/24/2007 8:03 PM EDT


Halloween (2007)–no matter how good it may be–will be nowhere as good as the original. The audience already knows the story, so apart from necessary departures (of which director Zombie spoke of in interviews) it is the same. Worse is that the film will be compared to Carpenter’s original (1978) and the discussion will center around how film and the industry have changed in the 29 years since release.

But Halloween will probably be the best “remake” this year in the scary movie genre. The Invasion looks like trash and I am Legend (a great book by the bye; likely 2nd or 3rd best on the subject of vampires) with WS will be technically and budget-wise better than the version with VP (1964 I believe; archive.org version cropped to 1.24:1), but shitty due to storigraphic changes making it more similar to the 1971 version with Charles Heston (but to be fair, the book does not end happily so I story could use work for transition to the screen.) Still I am not holding out much hope. It would appear from early releases of the screenplay that Neville survives and that is good for no one.

So Halloween is probably the remake I will hate the least.

Ghosted by the only jeff that matters. @ 07/24/2007 8:15 PM EDT


Why didn’t anyone tell me I could download gigs and gigs of public domain movies from archive.org ????

Ghosted by dohopoki @ 07/24/2007 8:30 PM EDT


Regarding the Halloween remake, why the need to explain Michael’s motivations? I am not thrilled with what I have read concerning Michael’s home life as a child. Supposedly he comes from an abusive home which of course is meant to be at least partially responsible for his mental problems.

Am I the only one that doesn’t want to see that? Maybe it is just me, but I found it far scarier when Michael Myers was the faceless, evil being, with no true motive. Sure eventually the sequels tried to explain his story, but not the first film. The unknown is always more frightening that what we have had explained to us.

I’m having flashbacks to a young Freddy Krueger, being taunted by his classmates, as he takes a hammer to the classroom pet.

I’ll still check it out, and I hope it is outstanding, but Rob has definitely made some choices I would not have.

Ghosted by Magic Toy @ 07/24/2007 9:28 PM EDT


Oh, one last thing about Halloween that I cannot stand. Sheri Moon Zombie plays Michael’s mother, Deborah Myers.

Ugh.

Even though I actually found some enjoyment in House of 1000 Corpses and The Devil’s Rejects, I despise her. She finds entirely new ways to annoy me with each new movie. Her voice is like fingernails being run down a chalkboard.

Ghosted by Magic Toy @ 07/24/2007 9:36 PM EDT


See, I always imagined Michael as having NO motivation. That’s the absolute frightening thing. He’s not abused. He simply one day decides to pick up a knife and kill his parents. Now THAT is scary.

Ghosted by Cameron T. @ 07/24/2007 9:41 PM EDT


mike meyers is the friggen boogeyman there is nothing to explain how or why. he just is.

Ghosted by Danny J @ 07/24/2007 9:51 PM EDT


yea i thought michael myers was just supposed to be a pure incarnation of the spirit of evil, which was why he could never be killed

Ghosted by dallasmovie @ 07/24/2007 9:53 PM EDT


dohopoki: We all had a pool to see how long it would take you to figure it out. And I had seventeen dollars on August 1st. I hope you’re satisfied.

Ghosted by Jedoc @ 07/24/2007 9:55 PM EDT


Jedoc- all the time you post things that make me laugh, I have always wanted to tell you that. Thanks.

Ghosted by kb @ 07/24/2007 10:03 PM EDT


I’m kind of excited about the Halloween remake/reimaginating/rewhatever. My only thing is that I’m not the biggest fan of Zombie’s films. I appreciate what he puts into them and that they comes off as something “his” — but it’s just not really my cup of tea. Not a complaint, just a personal preference.

Adding the Myers origin story may or may not work. It’s risky, for sure. “Creepy kids” are not easy to pull off (see the Omen remake), but I’ll reserve judgment. I’m not sure that Zombie is trying to establish a motive as much as he’s looking for an excuse to film things that fall more under the category of “original content” than “remake.” I mean, once it’s Myers killing people, it’s something that’s been done, no matter how cool or stylized.

I’m also a little fearful that the movie’s coming out just when its market is cooling off. Hostel 2 did not do well, and I think that’s as much a sign of a passing fad as it is an indictment of Hostel 2. There will always be a core fanbase for these movies, but it’s going to take a little luck to get up to Saw-level again.

I don’t feel that these remakes hurt the originals’ legacies at all. They can come out good or bad, but I can’t see them hampering or affecting my enjoyment of the originals at all. Except for that Omen redo That was bad enough to make the original suck by relation.

Ghosted by Matt @ 07/24/2007 10:16 PM EDT


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