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07/04/2007: Summer Megaparty: Happy 4th!

I’m recovering from an all-night pre-4th bender, so this will be brief. Happy 4th of JOO-LIE! (And to those of you in other nations, happy Wednesday!) We don’t have anything planned for the rest of the day, and I’m just now realizing that I completely forget to pick up gigantic steaks yesterday, leaving me with nothing to grill but a couple of bell peppers and a red onion. So, no barbecue…no fireworks…I’m the worst American ever.

On the other hand, traditions come in all shapes and sizes. What’s that I’m seeing on my television set at this very moment? A motherfuckin’ Twilight Zone marathon. Yes! And God is on my side today, because I caught it just at the start at one of my very favorite episodes, “Eye of the Beholder.” You know the one. Bandaged freak girl stuck in a hospital having multiple reconstructive surgeries to look normal…but when the bandages come off, it’s a SWERVE!


…because in this world, being beautiful means looking like a cross between a pig and “Influence” from Dick Tracy. There’s a lot of great episodes left in the marathon, which runs until 5 AM on the Sci-Fi Network. Check it out if all Independence Day means to you is a license to do nothing.

Also, today’s a good day for a look back at the “Cherry Cracker” Kool-Aid review — one of the world’s only Independence Day-themed beverages.


Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

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Discussion Thread: 79 comments

Happy Independence Day, everyone! I’m posting from my DS again, since both computers in my house are being used right now. It’s nice that I can go online with this thing whenever i want, although it can’t play music or video. So i’ll have to wait until later to watch the AVGN. I love the jukebox and am looking forward to seeing what else Matt has in store for us. Have a safe and happy holiday! i’m watching Seinfeld. :)

Ghosted by hoverbored @ 07/05/2007 1:31 AM EDT

Worked today, but Independence Day doesn’t really start until dark anyway (it’s all about blowing stuff up people).

And, as always I continued my annual tradition of seeking out the neighbors with the coolest fireworks and hanging out with them while they set them off.

Anyone else do that?

Ghosted by Tetsu Deinonychus @ 07/05/2007 2:04 AM EDT

I want to see Transformers again, but I’m going with someone to see SICKO Friay before it leaves are town -they move fast around here- and with Harry Potter next week, followed by so many other movies I want to see, it may have to wait…but I’m happy it had suc ha good opening weekend and that everyone seemed to enjoy it!

Ghosted by Shuanfu @ 07/05/2007 2:17 AM EDT

Independance day for me was back on Sunday, so today is mostly just sittign around the house, since it’s been raining all day.

Happy explosives day everyone.

Ghosted by DocDragon @ 07/05/2007 2:34 AM EDT

I, too, had a fairly low-key Fourth. BBQ’d burgers with some friends and watched 1776 (a musical about the writing and signing of the Declaration of Independence–it’s totally as awesome as it sounds).

Tetsu, I guess we kinda do that, because we didn’t set off any fireworks of our own, but rather watched everything all the other people in the city set off.

Ghosted by snowfire @ 07/05/2007 2:53 AM EDT

Anonymous @ 1:26 AM EDT –

Ah, The Monsters Are Due on Maple Street, one of my favorites as well. Not quite up there with Time Enough at Last, but pretty damn good.

I had to take a break from the TZ marathon a few hours ago. Well, that isn’t fair really. I never really partook in the marathon per se. I watched a few hand-picked episodes throughout the day. I did watch about four episodes of Law and Order however on TNT. One question, does TNT have an L n’ O marathon around once a week, or what?

I capped off the night with a viewing of Romero’s Day of the Dead.

Now I must sleep. Tomorrow I track down the elusive Kwik-E-Mart pink donut. It will be mine.

Ghosted by Magic Toe @ 07/05/2007 4:44 AM EDT

MythBusters, beer, hotdogs and fireworks…

America! What a country!

Ghosted by RHUBARBVELOCIRAPTOR @ 07/05/2007 8:22 AM EDT

In deference to the bar bet I once lost to an Englishman: happy Ungratefulness Day, you uppity colonials.

I got to help shoot off the community fireworks show last night. It’s the best perk of being a volunteer firefighter. Well, that and getting to ride around on the front of the brush truck with a firehose chasing down grassfires. Hurrah getting to play with eight-inch shells! Boo running around in full bunker gear in July in New Mexico.

Ghosted by Jedoc @ 07/05/2007 8:23 AM EDT

OHEMGEE…So I’m like fifteen posts behind and all, but I had to say…if you have not yet seen Transformers, drop what you are doing right now and GO. GO DAMMIT. You will not be disappointed. Seriously, it was so good. So so beyond good. It made me feel like a five-year-old kid. I’m going after work to buy more toys to add to my growing collection, who are all battling each other on my desk at work right now. Seriously, whatever you are doing right now is not nearly as important as going to see this movie. GO!

Ghosted by Nicole @ 07/05/2007 8:51 AM EDT

Quick, before I forget what I was going to say…! (1) 1776 is a GREAT flick. I use the phrase “I abstain…courteously” from time to time. (2) Transformers was frickin hilarious. Loved it from start to finish, and I was not that huge of a Transformers fan going in. (3) Dammit! There was a third point! Well, I’ll wonder back on in a few if I can remember it.

I’m sure you’re all waiting with baited breath…

Ghosted by purplegirl247 @ 07/05/2007 9:32 AM EDT

If anyone is interested Matt’s article on the orginal transformer article is up on http://www.wizarduniverse.com

Ghosted by UFkegger2 @ 07/05/2007 9:55 AM EDT

Aha, remembered! Cops were ticketing people over the holiday for pulling over on the side of the highway to watch fireworks. That’s sort of crappy, since technically they were out of the way, but still a safety issue, I guess.

But…! They also pulled people over for slowing down to watch the fireworks. Some of these morons were going *15 mph* on I-4 (our major highway where most people go 70 mph at least). MORONS!

Ghosted by purplegirl247 @ 07/05/2007 10:00 AM EDT

Happy Belated TAKE THAT, BRITAIN! Day!!

Speaking of Independence Day themed drinks, anyone been to Wal-Mart lately to see/grab up the $th of July decked out Hawaiin Punch? The Ruby Red and Lemonade flavors have the punch dude all lookin like a cracked out Uncle Sam. I don’t think anything has been done with the drink itself, but who doesn’t wanna buy juice with frieworks all over it?

For my 4th, my best friend and I bought and ate the “KFC Summerfeast” which is $25 dollars worth of KFC which includes: 12 pieces of chicken, 6 biscuits, 3 extra large sides, 2 big ass tubs of gravy, and 1/2 gallon of Lemonade. Oh hell yeah. Now I feel like hell sitting in an airport waiting to leave for 3 months of tour.

Ghosted by Brian @ 07/05/2007 2:14 PM EDT

“See Ratatouille instead of Transformers, or greedy Disney execs will decide John Lasseter doesn’t deserve to be in charge and replace him with another bean-counter and the video sequels will start all over again!”

If I say that on this site, will it fall on deaf ears?

Ghosted by Mars @ 07/05/2007 3:03 PM EDT

Hey, I want to see Ratatouille AND Transformers, and I can, unfortunately, only pick one.

My 4th was lame. I did nothing most of the day, then my dumb-ass stepbrother brought over a bootleg of Live Free or Die Hard, which I thought was pretty damn boring for a Die Hard movie. I’d like to give it another shot on the big screen, since I think bootlegs are crap like shit.

Ghosted by Annette @ 07/05/2007 4:05 PM EDT

Does anybody know where to find infomercials online? I have been looking for the Ultimate Chopper infomercial forever and can’t seem to find it. I want it for no other purpose than it’s my favorite infomercial. I don’t own an Ultimate Chopper and never plan on it, I just miss watching the infomercial.

If anybody can help me out, I’d be in your debt. I have an infomercial addiction and I need my fix.

Ghosted by fistpittingnork @ 07/05/2007 4:36 PM EDT

I forgot to mention, it’s the infomercial with Chef Tony and his fat, sausage fingers, and the host, Jenny-Lee, that ugly blonde lady with the huge mouth that pisses me off just looking at her.

Ghosted by fistpittingnork @ 07/05/2007 4:37 PM EDT

Meat!

Ghosted by kingklash @ 07/05/2007 4:41 PM EDT

Picked up Buzz Cola yesterday. Matt’s exactly right…it tasted just as you would imagine a can of Buzz Cola to taste like.

And earlier todai I saw on a crawl on CNN that Transformers beat out “Pirates 2″ for best 1 Day Opening on tuesday alone with $27.4 million or something (not counting the preview shows on monday)

Ghosted by Invader Norbert @ 07/05/2007 4:45 PM EDT

Jenilee Harrison is her name.

Ghosted by fistpittingnork @ 07/05/2007 4:55 PM EDT

The best Die Hard movie is “Die Hard With a Vengence”

man, I can’t type on X-E correctly.

Ghosted by Ian @ 07/05/2007 5:31 PM EDT

…And since I have nothing else to do…do a search on YouTube for Chef Tony. You can find your damn chopper infomercial. Too bad it’s in German (or something).

Ghosted by MaryJane @ 07/05/2007 5:56 PM EDT

The 4th is done and gone and I am back at work forced to actually work because I haven’t a new post yet to sink my high heels into! Matt…pretty please!??!

Ghosted by Cricket @ 07/05/2007 6:15 PM EDT

I love the Magic Bullet infomercial and its gang of interesting characters…everytime i come across it i can’t help but watch it and laugh!

Ghosted by phunqsauce @ 07/05/2007 7:13 PM EDT

Does anybody know where I can get some ASTRO POPS or anything like them. I know they are discontinued, but I want! I want!

Ghosted by James Smith @ 07/05/2007 7:17 PM EDT

My Fav Twilight zone is “For whome the bell tolls,” which is about a retiring English teacher. Probably obscure.

Twilight Zone still ranks as the best writing ever in Television, IMO.

Ghosted by Cameron T. @ 07/05/2007 7:21 PM EDT

Ellen Degeneres last year I believe did a show on infomercials, going in and out of break she showed clips of really old infomericals. Man Ronco in the 70’s and 80’s made some really shitty shit lol like an electric plastic pottery wheel. She had one there and turned on and that engine was noisy, it was 15.00 bucks. I used to watch those things all the time I was fasinated with them when I was a kid. I pretended that I didn’t know anything except what they told me and let them try to convince me to buy that product. There are some people that buy those sauna belts and such and I can’t believe it. there is informericalscams.com that tells you about products and how they suck. Another site is a message board I don’t remember what it’s called so google it.

My fav informerical as a kid was a product called the pump and seal it looked like a glamorous bike pump, it was a blueish purple and you sealed food and other things with it. There was these labels you were supposed to put over the hole I don’t know what they were called but my cousin (the one that just had a b-day) and I called them bandaids because they looked exactly like bandaids. My Grandma after 10 minutes or so of an infomerical she would tell me to change the station there was so much she could take. I have always wondered if i could work on a shopping channel and how do you get that job? I think I could do it. Especially the ‘useful household solutions’ segments.

Ghosted by Goob @ 07/05/2007 9:24 PM EDT

There was a Godzilla 90s Movie Marathon on Encore action. To bad I only caught some of it.

Ghosted by Frumious @ 07/05/2007 11:27 PM EDT

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