Would you believe me if I told you I published two new articles in less than a week? Miracles happen. Here’s a look at five random ’80s toys, which is an article I started seventeen years ago, got bored of and left to die. In the spirit of making X-E seem less like a marked grave and more like the party capital of Reno, I’ve dusted it off.
I would’ve put a little more into the ending, but I found myself distracted as the silver bells of a Lickedy Split ice cream truck blared through the open windows this afternoon. While such trucks usually have nothing but soft swirl cones, I had a hunch that this was going to be a special day. Hello, snowcone.
The snowcone is nature’s perfect food. Ice, colored and flavored by liquid sugar. Visions of fireflies, of wiffle ball and of smashing fireflies into the pavement with a wiffle ball bat, because those were some cool ass looking bug guts.
Nothing can compare to the official ice cream truck snowcone, which arrives in a conical paper wrapper with the ice divided into three colorful flavors. On a good day, you’ll get red, yellow and blue. On a better day, these three flavors will join hands to create a holy purple ice just beneath the outer surface — a holy purple ice that pretty much tastes like whatever fruit you tell it to taste like.
Me and the snowcone are heading downstairs to my walk-in freezer. He thinks I’m trying to help him not melt, but I just want to eat him without getting juice on my pants.
Posted by Matt. E-mail me!
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Actually,Invader Norbert, I don’t think Snorlax ever was the biggest Pokémon… I believe that honour went to Onix during the first generation. Then, when GSC came around, it was Steelix and now Wailord…
Oops…when I said “Biggest,” I meant “Heaviest.” I was fully aware that Onix was the Biggest in size at the time, but Snorlax was the heaviest, and the only one that came remotely close was Golem.
Now the Top 5 heaviest in terms of weight are:
Snorlax (1041.1 lbs)
Metagross (1212.5 lbs)
Dialga (1505.7 lbs)
Giratina (1653.5 lbs)
and Groudon (2094.4 lbs)
Golem (662 lbs) doesn’t even come close anymore, beaten by 10 more pokemon between it and Snorlax. and Wailord only weighs 877.4 lbs, but is still the longest at 47 feet, followed by Steelix, and then Onix.