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Big Red Gum’s Big Red Lie.

You know what used to really tick me off? Big Red gum.

Now, I've come to adore Big Red. Big Red helps keep secret smoke breaks secret. But, as a child, I wanted to kill the people responsible for Big Red, who tricked me over and over and over and over again with this one eensy little unforgettable image seen in practically every one of the gum's television commercials throughout the '80s:


Big Red is, was and always has been slices of all-red gum of the most basic kind. But the commercials always included the fancy image of the red-and-white striped, sent-from-God stick of gum seen above, and time and time again, I'd buy packs of Big Red expecting what was inside to finally reflect the holy image from the ads. It never happened.

I've spent my entire life wondering what I was missing. Was it supposed to represent the wrapper? Well, of course not, because you can see the wrapper in the very same image. Why was Wrigley's obsessed with perpetuating the idea that Big Red had a big, nice, shiny white stripe when in fact it never had such a stripe? Most importantly, how did I fall for this so many times?

Don't mean to make a mountain of minutiae, but I was a kid, and for every time I went for a pack of Big Red on the false promises of a fun stripe, I passed up a much tastier pack of Bubblicious. Sometimes even Paradise Punch Bubblicious. That's plain wrong.

Click here to watch the lousy lying stupid commercial.

UPDATE: Apparently my brain hasn't been functioning properly for the past few decades. As readers have pointed out, the heavenly red & white striped gum is meant to represent Big Red's puny competitor. I don't know how this flew by me. I'm ashamed. But I think we can at least all admit that their representation of the competition is far cooler than what they were trying to peddle. It looks like plastic!

Posted by Matt on 04/05/2007. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 97 comments

Oh man, up until now I didn’t know Big Red sticks DIDN’T have that white stripe! I feel like such a jackass!

Chestnuts roasted by Laser @ 04/05/2007 8:32 AM

Big Red now reminds me of the story Nickelodeon told a while back about that lady who threw up in the charity box at the McDonalds drive thru. “Everyone calls me Big Red.” hahahahaha…gross.

Chestnuts roasted by Bill @ 04/05/2007 9:00 AM

Eh, don’t feel too bad, Matt. It was only a month ago that I figured out that when people talk about “peaks and valleys” in a person’s life, they mean the peaks to represent the good parts and the valleys to represent the bad parts. It just completely threw me for a loop that I could take such a common, cliche phrase and get it completely backwards my whole life.

I still stand by my original interpretation, though. Mountaintops? Rocky, freezing, thin air, nothing living. Valleys? Green, fertile, warm, sheltered, generally have a river running down the middle. Cradles of life in a hellish rocky wasteland. What’s so great about peaks and terrible about valleys?

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 04/05/2007 9:20 AM

I never realized that was supposed to be the competitor’s gum either… I was thinking “maybe they offer it in two different gum formats, one being a regular stick and the other being a smaller, Trident-sized stick.” Hmm. What was up with Trident wrappers supposedly being edible? Was that true? I know I ate a few, because you can eat paper and it’s not a problem, but was that always just a stupid gum urban legend?

Black Jack, Teaberry, and Clove gum all rule. Doublemint and Juicy Fruit are the best mainstream gums though… When I drive up to the mountains to see my parents, I pass the Wrigley’s factory and the entire interstate smells like Juicy Fruit or whatever gum they’re making that day. INCREDIBLE. Makes me want to drive my car right into the factory, Kool-Aid man style, and swim in a vat of liquid juicy fruit.

Black Jack,

Chestnuts roasted by petrie @ 04/05/2007 9:32 AM

Umm…sorry for the back-to-back, but that extra little “Black Jack,” at the end of my post was an unexpected surprise… hmm.

Chestnuts roasted by petrie @ 04/05/2007 9:34 AM

Akbar Big Red soda is made in Texas I think, but for some reason we have it in Indiana too.

Chestnuts roasted by Tommy @ 04/05/2007 9:40 AM

Jedoc: That interpretation makes perfect sense to me. If it helps the original intent make more sense, think about it like a Sine wave ;)

Chestnuts roasted by K- @ 04/05/2007 9:45 AM

Big Red is indeed made in Texas. We also (at least in Waco and few other very select markets) have Big Peach, which is like Big Red, but with peaches. And it is God’s gift to us on earth.

And don’t worry, Matt, looking at the commercial, I also was confused about the gum with-white stripe. Thing is, what gum is that supposed to be? Was there any gum that had a white stripe like that?

Chestnuts roasted by Cameron T. @ 04/05/2007 9:48 AM

Tommy I remember visiting Texas way back, and going to some hole-in-the-wall diner. When I asked the waitress what soda they had, she rattled off, “Coke, Diet Coke, Sprite, and Big Red.” In the thickest drawl I had ever heard. And I naturally just needed to try it. Although there’s no way to describe the flavor. Not that it’s that spectacular. It’s just undescribable. (IMO)
Thanks so much for that commercial Matt. I completely remember it. As I was reading the blog I was a bit confused about the opinion of the sizing up of the gums. But I got here after the “update” so now I got it.

Chestnuts roasted by kb @ 04/05/2007 10:00 AM

I think it was supposed to be a competitor’s wrapped stick of gum, and the white stripe covered the brand name – sorry if someone else posted this while I was typing this…

Chestnuts roasted by Old Jim @ 04/05/2007 10:42 AM

So I get that the lil’ red and white gum is, like, the competing brand, and I was alive in the 1980s, but I have not ever once seen lil’ gum like that.

Has anyone?

I have trident. But that is as close as I have come.

Is there, like, a red trident that is the same thing as Big Red.

by the bye, BR is probably the worst gum ever.

The stripe might also, as I see it, be used to obscure the brand on the label.

Oh, by the bye, I chew gum quite frequently.

Chestnuts roasted by jeff. @ 04/05/2007 10:59 AM

Hey everyone, I hope I haven’t been gone long enough to make you all forget about me. However, in case I have, let me remind you that I am in the Army and I’m currently serving my second tour in Iraq. I really do apologize for being gone so long. I had a problem with my laptop where my adapter burned out and I didn’t have anything to charge my battery. Anyway, I ordered a new one through Amazon that I had to send home and have my mom send out to me (weird, Amazon can send an X-Box console out here but not a computer adapter). I’m actually using a temporary one until my new adapter comes in. Anyway, before I get off-topic which I normally so often do, let me send my post.

First of all, to comment on what Matt was saying in his blog, I never thought anything to be Big Red gum other than the big stick. Of course, I remember seeing tons of those commercials throughout my childhood. I wonder what advertisers find so amusing about showing people kiss for long periods of time. Didn’t CloseUp toothpaste try something similar with people kissing long periods of time with their commercials. Also, to Tommy and kb, I’ve been in Texas for a couple years (my home away from home for I am stationed in Ft. Hood when I’m not deployed, but my real actual home is Chicago) and have never come across Big Red soda. Okay, maybe I have, but I never affiliated it with Big Red gum and never tried it. I guess I would have to do so when I get back to the states.

Anyway, nothing new to report here. Anyone have big plans for Easter. I’ve tried having a little Easter countdown with ordering Easter themed DVDs and watching as many as I can. I’ve only managed to watch Will Vinton’s Easter special (which is on the same disc as the Christmas special, and there’s also a Halloween special which I will save for my Halloween countdown this year), the old “Easter Bunny Coming to Town” starring Fred Astaire as the voice of a train conductor, and being Holy Week I had to watch the classic made-for-TV movie “Jesus of Nazareth.” No, I’m not planning on watching “The Passion” for Good Friday, at least not this year. Other than that, I probably won’t watch much other than “It’s The Easter Beagle Charlie Brown” and The VeggieTales’, “The Easter Carol.” I have other Easter discs that may have to wait until next year to be viewed. I see Fat Albert has an Easter special. I know about the Halloween special, which by the way is also on DVD, but the Easter one is a new one to me! Oh well, never too late to start planning for next year.

Other than that, I have a package my mom sent me of Easter candy. I devoured the bag of LifeSaver jellybeans she sent me. I honestly think they taste better than Jelly Belly. Plus she sent me two bags of Cadbury Minieggs of which one now is no longer! Now that I think of it, there was other candy I could have asked for but forgot such as Marshmallow peeps, Reese’s Peanut Butter Eggs, and these chocolate marshmallow eggs that my dad used to always get every year. Another family favorite treat!

Well, that’s about all from me for now. I hope to get on for this week’s SNT. Of course, with it being Saturday night here, it’ll only be the afternoon back home. Oh well, I hope it’s never too early to start SNTing!!!! Hope to hear from you all and if not, Have a HAPPY EASTER!!!!

Chestnuts roasted by BJ @ 04/05/2007 11:03 AM

It’s so cute; only twice the size of a gray thumbnail!

Chestnuts roasted by Phayke @ 04/05/2007 11:09 AM

Jedoc: Peaks are exciting, have a better view, and more expensive houses. Really though, I’ve never heard ‘valley’ as a negative word before, except in the term ‘happy valley’, but even that’s just opinion.

Chestnuts roasted by Phayke @ 04/05/2007 11:18 AM

Big Red gum, SNES, and Doritos were my weekends as a kid, so the commercial was one of my favorites. I always thought that in the US that the gum had a white stripe and thats why whenever I bought it the stripe was missing. I also thought thats why Kit-Kats looked different on TV.

This also reminds me of the Juicy Fruit commercial, I always had to put the gum in my mouth the same way it was shown. Thats why I don’t like gum with the shell covering on it.

Chestnuts roasted by IHAQ @ 04/05/2007 11:19 AM

Then it happened in Sun Vaaaalleeeey
When you tripped and fell and so did I!

Chestnuts roasted by K- @ 04/05/2007 11:35 AM

Mystie: I licked the wrapper and put it on my forehead in high school. I had a red mark for the rest of the day.

I remember chewing cinnaburst and for some reason I think the wrapper was edible as well. I’m I mistaken?

Big Red soda? Isn’t that ACT?

Chestnuts roasted by Bill @ 04/05/2007 11:52 AM

I remember that Big Red commercial. I didn’t give a shit about Big Red. I wanted to know where I could buy some of that red and white striped gum!

Chestnuts roasted by David @ 04/05/2007 12:20 PM

I don’t like that gum. I do like this site however.

Chestnuts roasted by CdoubleJ @ 04/05/2007 12:22 PM

In my Sunday (Cleveland, OH) newspaper among the flyer w/ coupons I saw a .55 cent off coupon for VANILLA Big Red. What’s THAT all about? Has anyone tried it??

I didn’t bother clipping it because we don’t have that flavor around here.

I’m currently on a Vault’s Berry Blitz and Tommy Knocker’s Almond Creme soda kick right now.

Chestnuts roasted by JillS @ 04/05/2007 12:22 PM

I love Big Red soda. It is nearly impossible to find here in Atlanta. Fortunately Kroger sells a generic version that tastes virtually the same.

Chestnuts roasted by David @ 04/05/2007 12:24 PM

Oh, and by the way I’d also like to recommend SoHo’s Cola in the large 40 oz cans found at your local Big Lots. Made with pure sugar cane, baby!

Chestnuts roasted by JillS @ 04/05/2007 12:24 PM

I forgot to mention this yesterday, but the director of A Christmas Story, Bob Clark, was killed early yesterday morning. :cry:

Story here.

Was famous for Porky’s and Black Christmas as well. But hey, I’ll remember him for Rhinestone ;)

Chestnuts roasted by K- LOVES bad Stallone movies @ 04/05/2007 12:46 PM

It’s probably been years since I’ve even chewed gum at all. I need to get on it! Fruit Stripes here I come! (not really, that was the worst)

What was with the fad in the 90s of making gum in the shapes of everything imaginable? I had a gum CD in a jewel case, I kid you not.

Chestnuts roasted by Tommy @ 04/05/2007 12:54 PM

The red part of the smaller gum reminds me of the stick that came in Handi-Snaks (sp?) for spreading the oh-so-deliciously-fake cheese on your cracker.

And for the record, I think Big Red tastes completely different now then when I was younger…But that’s just me.

Chestnuts roasted by Mary Mary @ 04/05/2007 1:04 PM

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