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Boku: Nectar of the Gods, Boxed.

I started thinking about Boku tonight. Not sure why. There isn't a lot of information about Boku online, save for the innumerable mentions of its ad campaign, which starred funnyman Richard Lewis as just the right guy to bridge the juice box gap between kids and adults. I really don't remember much about those ads, surprisingly, but I certainly remember Boku.


The early 90s brought with it a proliferation of "let's try this" beverages, and by that I'm referring to drinks with marketing strategies that hadn't truly been tested before. I remember being totally floored by stupid things like Mistic's line of bottled fruity drinks, because they looked like water and tasted like liquid Starburst. Common now, but at the time, our collective consciousness was knocked into unconsciousness by the deliciousness of these new beveragenesses. Within this mighty gamut of wet new competitors, Boku stood out as a true original.

Basically, Boku was a collection of drink boxes for the older crowd. At least, that's how it was marketed. To differentiate Boku from Ssips and the many other kiddie drinks, the boxes were taller, slenderer and just more adult looking overall. Though Boku boxes ultimately caved into pressure and became more colorful and loud, when they first launched, I distinctly remember buying them in really odd, mostly white boxes with just a few touches of color. The flavors were also aged up -- instead of grape, you got "white grape." I would describe their appeal as being along the lines of nonalcoholic wine.

Wait. I can't believe "slenderer" is really the correct plural of "slender." Spellcheck says it is.

The biggest change of all? No straws. At least, not initially. I'm betting that parent company McCain ultimately stopped trying to be so damn rebellious, but when I was buying Boku, it didn't come with a straw. It just had this foil "slip" that could be peeled away to reveal a much larger drinking hole than was the norm for juice boxes. I don't really get why they were so adamant about giving juice boxes an adult spin, but I think dropping the straw was crossing a line that juice boxes should never cross. Sure, I was young when I drank these, but I don't think you need a college education to drink stuff without spilling it. Between the gaping drinking hole, slenderer (I still can't believe that's correct) boxes and lack of straw, Boku tended to spill like spilling was the in thing.

When I was in whatever grade I was in, I attached a milk crate to my bike's handlebars. That same week, I was finally given permission to ride to the few stores that were in a negotiable biking distance from my house. So, armed with rights and a milkcrate, I spent many summer afternoons going to this shitty little deli a few blocks away, loading my crate with Boku and chips and the occasional copy of Weekly World News, and riding home like a big boy.

Posted by Matt on 01/15/2007. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 118 comments

I was always too unsophisticated for Boku, but man, do I remember Junior Juice!!!! I LOVED it! I drank Junior Juice from the age of 2 to at least 10. It was just so adorable and tiny, with cool little fun facts and jokes written on the back! Motts came out with a similarly tiny juice box in the nineties, and I remember it being the only way I could tolerate apple juice (I don’t know why. I hate most juices or sodas in large doeses). I’ll check my grocery to see if their still sold. It’d be a shame for tiny boxes like those to dissappear. Some kids don’t like their juice super sized. :/

Chestnuts roasted by Maxwell, For Sale @ 01/16/2007 1:01 AM


omfg, grammatic blashemy. I’ll see if they’re*** still sold.

-.-;

Chestnuts roasted by Maxwell, For Sale @ 01/16/2007 1:04 AM


There there, Maxwell. It happens to the best of us.

Chestnuts roasted by Jessica Marie @ 01/16/2007 1:32 AM


I’m all about the barrel drinks, baby. Though I totally miss my Orbitz.

Chestnuts roasted by Mystie @ 01/16/2007 1:40 AM


I used to keep my books in milk crates. I had two or three stacked at the foot of my bed (pink and blue). They were really makeshift bookshelves, but they did the job. I remember I had yarn tied in one of the holes, too. Hmmm.
Never tried Boku. :(

Chestnuts roasted by Rainbowfeet @ 01/16/2007 1:41 AM


Just a by the way- “slenderer” isn’t plural, it’s comparative. But it still looks dumb. :)

Chestnuts roasted by Candace @ 01/16/2007 1:43 AM


Dammit, why did I say plural. :(

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 01/16/2007 2:35 AM


Heh, a buddy and I put out a zine back in high school, and we used to fill white space with classifieds out of the News. I remember particularly the ones with chicks in bullet bras. I still have an envelope somewhere full of ads I was saving up…I actually tried to pick up a WWN the other day, but I looked up and down and the store didn’t carry it, which is a travesty.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 01/16/2007 2:48 AM


i like josta

Chestnuts roasted by Eddie Lightning Frog @ 01/16/2007 2:55 AM


Happy Martin Luther King day people, WoooHooo Night off!!!!!

And just so that I can make sure I’m not Highjacking the thread, my Grandma made me clean out her garage, (I’m 26 years old but that women still instills fear like the hand of god, so I pretty much do what she wants) Lo and behold she had like 15 trunks of old newspapers, one of them was full of Weekly world newses and the National Enquirerers. Talk about having the rest of the day shot.

Chestnuts roasted by Jester @ 01/16/2007 3:19 AM


Whatev, man, it’s all about the Hi*C. The box that rocks. But you knew that.

Chestnuts roasted by Julie @ 01/16/2007 5:01 AM


Ah, Weekly World News. Once a bastion of untold entertainment, it has gone completely downhill since it became, for lack of a better term, “self aware”.

When it presented the completely outlandish and insane as fact, it was awesome. Now it’s in on it’s own joke, and the entertainment is long gone.

Chestnuts roasted by Wukong @ 01/16/2007 5:04 AM


While Hi*C was always my favorite (in fact, I picked up a case of Orange Lavaburst the other day… so disappointing…), does anyone remember the Hershey’s chocolate milk boxes? I LOVED those things!

Hey, did anyone else have a plastic juice box holder?!?! I did and I remember being the talk of the cafeteria because I had a special see-through plastic box that snapped on around my juice box. I really have no clue what purpose it served, but it made me quite the trendsetter back then. haha

I loved Squeez-Its, as well. Their blue flavor was always my favorite (not sure what that flavor was as I seriously doubt my elementary school self would have touched anything blueberry-flavored).

And “more slender” is always my preferred alternative when I come across one of those pesky “erer” words.

Chestnuts roasted by Special K @ 01/16/2007 6:29 AM


no but i had a transformers lunch box with matching thermos, PIMPIN’

Chestnuts roasted by cheeky @ 01/16/2007 6:52 AM


I know Matt did an article on this but I still love the Ecto-cooler Hi-C. It remindes me of summertime at the shore. I think when you say “juice box” it pretty much will make anyone regress a little.

By the way, loved the AD episode when Buster mistakes the wine box for a giant juice box. Who keeps straws that size?

Chestnuts roasted by Bill @ 01/16/2007 7:10 AM


dammit i wanted to play this, i think they may have just been hyping up their other game “time o”

We are very glad to see the overwhelming response to the Ghostbusters prototype movies. What you’ve seen is indeed in-game footage of early prototypes on the Xbox 360, running on ZootFly’s proprietary engine. Due to licensing issues, further development of the Ghostbusters game hit a bump on the road, but everybody here at ZootFly is working actively on resolving the challenges with the owners of the Ghostbusters IP.

Not to lose the momentum, a part of the ZootFly team is currently working on an original game called TimeO, which is closely related to Ghostbusters. The game follows the adventures of two die-hard New Yorkers. They get trapped deep in the shadow world of a parallel New York. The city itself is a war machine threatening to wipe out our world and they have three days to stop it.

As soon as the Ghostbusters IP issue is resolved, the whole team will go back to Ghostbusters. In the meantime, please enjoy these two movies.

Chestnuts roasted by cheeky @ 01/16/2007 9:29 AM


Mystie: Orbitz! Was that the drink that had those little neon floaty things in it?? If so, I remember that was one of the weirdest tasting beverages I’ve ever consumed…Whatever happened to those?

Chestnuts roasted by Mary Mary @ 01/16/2007 9:45 AM


Holy crap, hearing about Boku made me remeber that while they were making juice boxes for adults they were also marketing juice boxes for little toddlers as well. There was this one drink box add, I can’t remember the name of the drink, but it came in juice boxes that were roughly HALF the size of normal juice boxes. I remember seeing one kid drinking it at school in the third grade. He needed like 3 of them just to equal one full ssips. It was insanity!!!!! If anyone can remember these things please reveal their identity for me!!!

Chestnuts roasted by TC Falcon @ 01/16/2007 10:06 AM


Orbitz were indeed the carbonated beverage with tiny floating balls of glucose in them. They didn’t last long, primarily because people didn’t like their drink being interrupted by the constant interference of tiny beads of stuff that had the texture of soggy bread.

The idea was cool in theory. I certainly bought a six back of the thing just because I thought they looked cool, so it was a good marketing device. It was just that, once you got them, the drinks were absolutely awful.

Chestnuts roasted by Wukong @ 01/16/2007 10:51 AM


I’ve always hated the whole straw thing. I love it when boxes have openings for sippage. I don’t use a straw in anything unless it has a lid. And even then it’s a pain.

I’m one of those guys who eats milkshakes with spoons. The better to dunk my fries :D

Chestnuts roasted by K- @ 01/16/2007 11:48 AM


Ahhh … yes … Boku. I hearted that stuff, the white grape and rasperry was particularly fine. I was also a fan of Clearly Canadian, the carbonated, flavored water. I liked the cherry flavor. It really set off the flavor in those fake Funions I liked so much as a kid.

Chestnuts roasted by LemurCat @ 01/16/2007 12:36 PM


Soggy bread, eh Wukong? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orbitz_%2528soft_drink%2529&hl=en&gl=us&ct=clnk&cd=1&client=firefox-a” rel=”nofollow”>Wikipedia seems to think so, too.

Chestnuts roasted by Mystie @ 01/16/2007 12:49 PM


I used to drink that stuff when I was younger. I really liked the taste. Never spilled it, though.

Don’t remember much about the commercials, except that Richard Lewis would constantly be bitching about other drinks and saying something like “I want my Boku.” Now that I think about it, I wonder if it was just a matter of the verbal irony being lost on me (seeing as I wasn’t to learn about that until a few years had passed), in that he was whining like a child about how he didn’t want this or that kind of drink, but he wanted Boku because Boku was the beverage for adults. Whether or not it’s actually funny will have to wait until I see the commercials again.

Chestnuts roasted by Frank D @ 01/16/2007 1:22 PM


Orbitz, yeah, I really really wanted to like them. They looked so cool, I think the only flavour I had was, something and pineapple, man it didn’t even taste like it was edible. Blah!

Chestnuts roasted by IHAQ @ 01/16/2007 2:05 PM


Hey, can someone help me outÉ I remember drinkin this weird shit when I was a kid. I cant remember the name of it or much else but I do remember it was a clear liquid with a shitload of tiny colored balls of gel or some shit floating in it. Much appreciated if anyone can help

Chestnuts roasted by Dro Bro @ 01/16/2007 2:25 PM


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