Yeah, so, we went to Atlantic City Friday night, and for once in my miserable life, I actually won. Luck was on my side during various slot-related activities, most notably when at a Star Wars penny machine which let me cash out with around 1500 bucks. Most of that went back to the casino over the course of a looooong night, but I still came out ahead. That Star Wars slot was amazing. Don’t let the “penny” thing fool you, because the max bet was 450 pennies, meaning that I paid 4.50 per spin. There were all kinds of insane bonuses. Like, sometimes you’d have to pick Vader or Obi-Wan in a lightsaber duel, and they’d battle right there on the video screen. More ultimately, a giant Death Star toy sat atop the machine, and if you got the right bonus, it’d spin around and give you massive coinage. I was stupid to keep pressing my luck, but even breaking even would’ve been a nice surprise after years of losing way too much cash down there. Actually having more money than we started with after doing the big count-up was an incredible feeling that I will probably never experience again.

We stayed at the Tropicana, which got a major facelift in the years since my last visit. It’s in many ways just as flashy as The Borgata now, albeit less airy, and there’s some really great newish bars to boot. The Trop is a tough sell because it’s all the way on the ass end of the boardwalk with every other casino being more than a 15 minute walk away, but if you’re in the area, give it a shot — you’ll feel fancy.

After a night of debauchery and like two hours sleep, we hit the boardwalk for a couple of minutes just because it was there to hit, and though there wasn’t much to see all the way down by Trop’s area, there was one old school casino arcade, called “Playcade,” complete with broken crane machines and an assortment of dusty, million-point prizes that would require 55,000 games of skeeball to achieve. I considered doing a little story on it, but the security in this place was shockingly tight, and I was too hungover to field the “WHADYA THINK YOU’RE DOIN?!” looks and body language. Instead, we’ll settle on this…

Converted from The Simpsons arcade game, it’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Turtles In Time! I know it’s not entirely uncommon to convert one game into another, or at least use the framework with new innards, but Playcade went for some extra low rent charm points by barely redecorating the cabinet. From the sides (which are far more visible due to the arcade’s cramped aisles), you’d assume this was The Simpsons. Only when you get in front of machine could you notice the supremely crude and totally homemade Ninja Turtles marquee, which doesn’t even successfully convey that this is the Turtles In Time sequel.

Oddly, both The Simpsons and Turtles In Time came out in 1991, so I’m left curious as to how the latter ended up cannibalizing the former. Probably a case of Bart’s electronic innards going haywire, and the arcade’s owner having more luck finding a Turtle-themed replacement. Either way, I love that marquee.

The new seasons of 24 and Rome start tonight, coinciding. And here I am, Tivoless.

Posted by Matt. E-mail me!