12/11/2006: Oatmeal Swirlers, you can give it a swirrrl.
In the most shocking turn of events ever, I went and posted a real, regular article. Caveat is, it’s a really short, malformed article. Actually, it was going to just be a blog entry, but I couldn’t convince myself to sentence something as awesome as Oatmeal Swirlers to the depths of the blog archive, so, here we are. Oatmeal Swirlers delighted my childhood hands and tongue by letting me draw edible pictures all over oatmeal, and even if you weren’t around for those joys, I hope this article will help you understand why they were joys. Includes poorly made spiral graphics and a download of the original commercial.
Discussion Thread: 94 comments
Matt, have you seen the hermit crab kits @ Target? They have Spiderman and the Hulk on the provided shells.
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Joe H @ 12/11/2006 10:38 PM EST
Yes! These were the highlight of my breakfast when I could actually convince my mom to buy them. I had totally forgotten about them.
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Cyclone @ 12/11/2006 10:39 PM EST
I can’t… figure out… if I remember this stuff. Argh.
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Hey I'm Jeff @ 12/11/2006 11:00 PM EST
Dude! I totally ate these all the time in winter as a kid! Loved the icing. But if you made any shape other than a swirl, it tasted bland in parts cause it didnt’ soak into all of it. 
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Terror Claws Cole @ 12/11/2006 11:07 PM EST
I remember something very similar to these, but the stuff was green or red or some other bizarre hue.
They were so much a part of breakfast that I actually found it odd that my “Maple and Brown Sugar” packages didn’t come with them - which reminds me, I don’t know if it was just a Canadian thing or not, but does anyone remeber that they used to print little “animal profile” things on the individual packets of oatmeal (the Quaker stuff, natch)? It was like little greenpeace-propaganda with your breakfast, they were fun.
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Roadblock @ 12/11/2006 11:09 PM EST
Mmmmm… I also loved Oatmeal Swirlers. You know what expired food product I’ve been hungry for lately? Mr. Phipp’s Pretzel Chips!
Has anyone seen the Disney red and green “Magic Middles” cookies in their grocery stores? I have yet to see any, and strangely the Magic Middles wiki has been gone for the past few weeks. It’s giving me this little sliver of hope they might bring back REAL Magic Middles, and I don’t want to get my hopes up. ._.
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Mystie @ 12/11/2006 11:16 PM EST
OOOOOooooo this is the one gimmick my mom would let us buy! Because oatmeal was healthy……and we were allowed to pick out a fruit flavor(fruit is healthy). My sister and I only liked/agreed on the Strawberry red color….
Wow…. This was actually not included in my mother’s ‘you can’t get what you see on TV’ reign of terror! These things were great…It took my sister and I some time to figure out how to cut open the packages to make drawings. We would fold the packages over on themselves to make the opening smaller…. strategic drawings….
Nice.
ahhhhh nice memories
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Fristine @ 12/11/2006 11:16 PM EST
Yet another product I remember, but did not try, nor did I want to try at the time. But yet again thanks to this place, I don’t think I can go on until I try it!
This stuff needs to come back!
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IHAQ @ 12/11/2006 11:45 PM EST
Roadblock I totally remember the animal things! Did they also have random facts like the worlds longest yodel or something on them too? It made every breakfast my mom had time to make oatmeal fun!
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Phil G. @ 12/11/2006 11:51 PM EST
God I miss this shit. I still eat oatmeal (Any kind with cinnamon and sugar in it) almost every day.
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Bryan @ 12/12/2006 12:04 AM EST
My. that. was. bad. Really. really. bad. I mean Harvey was awesome, but other than that, just absolute shite. Bummer.
Only good part was their song. And that’s on Youtube, so I’ll take solace in that. I won’t even begin to tell you how much they mucked up.
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K- @ 12/12/2006 12:04 AM EST
Awe, Matt, you think of everything! 
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Gemma @ 12/12/2006 12:12 AM EST
YES. Loved this stuff, and I miss it, too. One time I was just squeezing it in randomly, and I ended up with a deer. I still have the photo. Most of the rest of the time it was swirls. Always strawberry.
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Rainbowfeet @ 12/12/2006 12:20 AM EST
Sweeet! I loved that stuff, except I never remembered the name of it. It could also be that I enjoyed a similar product that was in competition to swirlers, but anyway, fruity paste in oatmeal = happy.
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Mattman @ 12/12/2006 12:42 AM EST
Great stuff matt the commercial was so awesomely 80s
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thejyav @ 12/12/2006 12:45 AM EST
I have a few notes from the last two blog entries, since Matt is being kind and making so many.
First, Predaking could totally take on Voltron all by himself. I said this once before, and I’m saying it again. Also, someone asked the names of the Voltron force. They are Keith, Hunk, Pidge, Lance, and Sven (who was replaced by the dumbest princess in the unviverse).
Second, while it’s kind of hard to see, the hardwood floor in Matt’s apartment looks pretty nice. I’ve always kind of wanted hardwood floors, but I heard they are cold in the winter. True? False? Also, Matt why the heck would you spend the time and money to upgrade an apartment? Do you own the place, or is the landlord paying you? Please tell me you’re not screwing yourself.
Third, Spazz is not Spaz307. It should be patently obvious since s/he managed to hold it to a couple of sentences.
Fourth, Cameron T., I was incorrect when I said iTunes converted everything in my My Music folder. It actually duplicated everything. This is good because I can still go back to Creative and just delete iTunes and all the files it created. This is bad because my media now takes (at a guess) 120 gig instead of 60 gig. I think I actually found a half-ass way to delete stuff on the fly from the iPod. If I rate the craptastic stuff like “Star Wars Disco” as one star, I think I can tell iTunes to only sync unrated stuff and ratings higher than one star. It’s still slower, because it means I have to actually cue the song, but it’s better than nothing. I haven’t actually taken the iPod back yet, and it might be growing on me. It still annoys me that I have to find work arounds when a software update could fix almost every problem I have with this device. (The audio quality still isn’t great, but I think that may have more to do with the file compression than the hardware. I haven’t done enough research yet to know if I’m right about this.)
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spaz307 @ 12/12/2006 12:47 AM EST
Yeah, those animal facts were the only reason I ate oatmeal. Now I don’t touch the stuff.
Also, Advent Calender = Crack. I’ve been reloading ehre for the past 15 mintues waiting for the Dec 12 entry, hoping it won’t be updated at 5 PM tommorrow. Maybe I should sleep on it.
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Roadblock @ 12/12/2006 1:23 AM EST
I remember Oatmeal Swirlers, too. I loved the strawberry, and still eat oatmeal with strawberry jam on the rare ocassions that I actually eat oatmeal.
I’d also like to mention that the Advent calendar update was particularly awesome today.
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Sami @ 12/12/2006 1:34 AM EST
I think I remember eating these, but I’m probably mistaken.
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Mike P @ 12/12/2006 1:36 AM EST
Knacks and Tigerboy sure found a way to make the time pass up there.
I know what they’re doing up on that Advent Calender 
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K- @ 12/12/2006 1:39 AM EST
I loved, loved, LOVED Oatmeal Swirlers when I was a kid. I was always one to play with my food, and any food that was MEANT to played with helped my cause greatly.
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MissJess @ 12/12/2006 1:39 AM EST
This is an ideal product for those of us who love the tons of flavor and sugar all in one spot. I used to love it in regular oatmeal when I’d get a chunk of the undissolved powder flavoring. But then you don’t want to eat the rest of it because it’s so bland.
Fristine - did your mom ever realize that it wasn’t really a healthy meal at all?
I remember trying these on a few separate occasions, but I really despise strawberries and I don’t remember trying any other flavors of goo. I ate a heckuva lot of Toaster Pastries, though, and got my artistic kicks out of those (while trying to be as frugal as possible with the frosting so I could orally mainline the rest).
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Special K @ 12/12/2006 1:52 AM EST
Know what I remember from my Childhood that I’d like to place a name on?
(I’m from Canada so I’m not sure if you had them in the States)
There were these cookies right? and they all had a medieval theme to them. (knights,dragons,princesses ,etc) and I vividly remember the commercials where it would show the cookie morph do something than morph back to a cookie.
If any one could help me out here so I know that I’m not insane that’d be great.
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Phrat Pirate @ 12/12/2006 1:53 AM EST
I was all about Apple Cinnamon.
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Ragnarok @ 12/12/2006 2:17 AM EST
On the new “Year Without A Santa Claus”, I thought it was ok. More like “C” level. not good, not great, but not really horrible either. The original cartoon was “meh” to begin with, with the Misers saving it.
This time around, I’m actually glad that they had SOME explanation on why Santa wants to cancel Christmas! There’s too much commercialism! He’s not a dick here at all! And the Misers…bastardized! I said this before, but I liked the casting choice of Michael McKean as Snowmiser, and Harvey actually made a convincing Heatmiser…yet you just can’t beat the original. I was glad to see that the Miser’s total role was not limited to the youtube preview, with many of the elements of the original intact (I believe Heatmiser’s “Hot Line” was used the first time too)
Speaking of which, during a montage at the beginning, we see clips of It’s A Wonder Life (i think), Christmas Vacation, and a brief clip from the original special.
Great stuff matt the commercial was so awesomely 80s
Except they didn’t sell it in the 80’s. It was made and sold in the early 90’s, during the transition period when grunge was starting to cast its dark emo shadow, yet you could still wear loud flourescent junk.
There was a Swirler ad before this that introduced the product, and had the mascot character in it. He taught us that “Swirls just wanna have fun.”
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Mars @ 12/12/2006 3:07 AM EST
I definitely remember this stuff, though I don’t know if I ever actually tried it. We were lucky to get anything fancier than plain Quaker. I still keep a few packs of maple/brown sugar in my desk for hungry mornings; I like to put in a tiny amount of water in and just have a shot-sized serving. If the spoon doesn’t stick, cement-like, it’s not my style.
Love the detail of the “Mean People Suck” sticker. Adds to the realism.
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squee4242 @ 12/12/2006 3:09 AM EST
I think I would have enjoyed the Misers bit on Youtube if they hadn’t been surrounded by bad dancing girls in Dallas Cowboys cheerleader outfits. Was there some reason they couldn’t at least have made Heatmiser’s girls redheads? Kinda ruined it all for me.
My vote for ‘the boss’ is one of the 2002 Mares who were never properly contained. 
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Moony @ 12/12/2006 7:11 AM EST
Special K- It came in nummy maple syrup-ish too. Though, I liked the strawberry, the maple was my favorite.
I thought about making an Amazon wishlist for a sec tonight. They don’t sell Christmas in the North East though. I think I might be area-sick for the first time EVER. I miss being able to hit Boston and NYC for Christmas.
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MissJess @ 12/12/2006 7:11 AM EST
I remember that stuff, and I know I ate it, but I don’t really remember eating it… that’s why I don’t have a website, I guess
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Abbie @ 12/12/2006 7:31 AM EST
Jessica Marie….
I think she had no clue…just loved her rules…..she had a no sugar cereal rule…. no cabbage patch rule.. no pound puppy rule…
lots of rules…
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Fristine @ 12/12/2006 8:08 AM EST
We had a no sugar cereal rule in our house as well. But Oatmeal was allowed. I think we had these too. We also had a no Barbie rule and a no Nintendo rule. But my uncle orent and broke that one. Which my parents forgave after becoming addicted to Super Mario Bros.
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kb @ 12/12/2006 8:32 AM EST
Matt,
Is eggnog bad for you home made (without alchohol), because of all of the raw eggs?
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Cotter @ 12/12/2006 9:33 AM EST
Fristine - Sorry you missed out on so much! At least you’re free now to enjoy the nostalgia.
All this talk about Oatmeal Swirlers reminded me of something I adored when I was younger. Does anyone remember the fruit roll-up knockoff that was a skinny line of fruit, swirled around on shiny white cardboard? I feel like it was inspired by/copied from Fruit by the Foot… anyway, I spent many happy lunches carefully removing one end of the snack and eating it in one long string, much like spaghetti.
Between those and Squeez-its, it took me ages to realize what real fruit tastes like
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Liz @ 12/12/2006 11:25 AM EST
I know this is going to sound sacreligious to some of you, but I hate oatmeal. I use to hate when my mom made us it eat. Unless it’s some sort of egg, I hate anything warm in the morning.
My mom use to hide all our sweet cereal in the house because my brothers and I could kill a box of it in one morning. Not the smaller boxes either. I’m talking about the big $6-$7 ones.
Now, I buy as much as I want withoug worrying. Matter of fact, I bought 2 boxes of Frankenberry and 2 boxes of Fruity Pebbles yesterday. So =P to my mom.
Spaz307
I found the best way to deal with an Ipod and iTunes is to create your own music lists. I have my music organized in folders, but the auto search function of iTunes sucks and makes a mess of your files, especially if you’re not careful and have it import everything into the /my music/iTunes directory. All I did was create a playlist for each folder I have, and even the sub folders, so it mimicked my current organization scheme. Also, make sure you edit the ID3 tags on the MP3 files. Just right click the song or songs and click get info. If the ID3 tag is messed up, it will show up that way on your iPod and iTunes, sometimes making it impossible to figure out what song your looking for, who the artis is, or even what a song is. Alot of stuff you download off of peer to peer networks have their ID# info messed up. iTunes doesn’t use the actuall file name for it’s display information, just the ID3 tags. I know it’s a bit tedious, but it will save you huge headaches down the road.
Be glad you didn’t download the first iteration of iTunes 7. It was completely fucking up peoples music collections thanks to the gapless playback feature. Complete cutting off the last 5 seconds of every song in some peoples libraries. It happened to some of my songs, but I completely backed up my music the night before I installed iTunes 7, and that was without knowing the myriad of problems that version 7 would present. Apple is getting as bad a Microsoft. Putting out have assed software and fixing it later.
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Darth Galvatron @ 12/12/2006 11:40 AM EST
Do you like Nintendo? (Of course you do, you read X-E!)
Do you like Advent Calendars? (Of course you do, you read X-E!)
Check this out:
http://www.mission-in-snowdriftland.com/
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Cameron T. @ 12/12/2006 12:10 PM EST
Great article Matt, I remember and also loved Oatmeal Swirlers!
Merry Christmas!
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Fox @ 12/12/2006 12:36 PM EST
“Except they didn’t sell it in the 80’s. It was made and sold in the early 90’s, during the transition period when grunge was starting to cast its dark emo shadow, yet you could still wear loud flourescent junk.”
Ah yes. Good ol’ 1990-1991. When the 80’s and (what would become) the 90’s collided and exploded in an explosion of flourescent colors and plaid!
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Steven @ 12/12/2006 1:15 PM EST
I wasn’t a real adventurous eater as a kid, so I wasn’t really interested in these. Maybe that would have been different if they had played up the other flavors more, but all I ever saw was strawberry and something about that was really unappealing to me. Now, I’m kind of curious. It didn’t really matter, because I know in my heart of hearts my parents never would have bought these. We were the kind of family that had Malt-o-Meal bagged cereals, so gimmicky food didn’t fare well on our shopping list (unless Dad wanted to try it.)
I have a feeling I may get a bit long winded about this: I made myself watch The Year Without a Santa Claus until the very end because I wanted to be able to judge it fairly, even though I was thoroughly uninterested by 9:10 (doesn’t it seem odd to air a two-hour, family-oriented Christmas special at 9 PM on a weeknight?) Speaking of which, there was a reason the original was only an hour. That story could not sustain a two hour special. I agree with Norbert that it was nice to see Santa a little more justified in wanting to cancel Christmas (in the original, I wanted to scream, “Need a holiday?! You only work one day a year!”). I also laughed out loud at Jack LaLanne as Hercules in the Mythopolis video. Other than that…blech! This special suffered from an identity crisis. Was it a campy remake or a heartfelt family special? I’ve always enjoyed the Heat Miser/Snow Miser song, and it would have been a crime to remake this special without it, yet with all the changes they made to the story, the song seemed really out of place to me. (Personal opinion: The creole accent that Harvey Fierstein attempted was grating.) I also felt that there were parts when the original story held up just fine, but they changed the story just for the sake of changing it. Synopsis: Though the casting was inspired, and there were humorous moments added in for a more modern audience, trying to combine the quirky concept with the “real-life” B-story and live action resulted in a total train wreck.
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Lori @ 12/12/2006 1:18 PM EST
Synopsis: Though the casting was inspired, and there were humorous moments added in for a more modern audience, trying to combine the quirky concept with the “real-life” B-story and live action resulted in a total train wreck.
Sounds alot like what the new Transformers Live Action movie will end up as.
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Darth Galvatron @ 12/12/2006 1:27 PM EST
Remember and loved the stuff. Did Quaker have its own version, though? I may falsely remember Quaker jam swirlie crap. In any case, good times, I ate the goo straight from the packet.
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Julie @ 12/12/2006 1:47 PM EST
Ohh, I totally remember the commercials for these. We never got them (we never got any fancy stuff like this…) but they sure looked neat. I’m sure I attempted to recreate the experience with syrup at some point.
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Ariel @ 12/12/2006 2:17 PM EST
I remember this stuff. I never ate it, but I do remember it. I was one of those picky eaters and I think 1990-91 was the year when I only ate the outer part of a Dunkin’ Donuts sweet roll for breakfast. Every damned day. I sometimes wonder how my mother kept her sanity.
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LemurCat @ 12/12/2006 2:24 PM EST
does anyone know if ‘year w/o santa claus’ is going to rerun? i had wanted to see it but i watched the bears game instead.
by the way, the only oatmeal i can eat is steel cut irish oatmeal. i might have been the only kid who DIDN’t want the fruit swirly-ness and was satisfied with the boring stuff
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colls @ 12/12/2006 2:31 PM EST
When I see oatmeal, no matter what the fruity wacky gimmick is, I think of Gruel. (Specifically, from “Oliver”). That makes me sick.
I’ll stick to dry cereal, thanks.
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Cameron T. @ 12/12/2006 3:27 PM EST
Missed it last night, did some shopping. Sounds like it could of used a swirl of fruity goo.
Steel-cut Irish oatmeal: You can take away it’s life, but you can’t take away it’s roughage!
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kingklash @ 12/12/2006 3:41 PM EST
I never bought Oatmeal Swirl for my kids; knowing my boys back then, they would have written rude words on top of the oatmeal.
I did (and still do) buy sugar cereal…it just wasn’t allowed at breakfast - dessert only.
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Trish @ 12/12/2006 3:47 PM EST
I don’t recall ever trying to write cuss words in my oatmeal, mainly just stars. Fast forward 8 years later to me picking up a copy of Teen Witch at Barnes and Noble. I blame the oatmeal.
Also, my initials are incredibly easy to write on anything. They’re VMW so I can pretty much get away with going \/\/\/ and attesting all letters are present and accounted for.
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Mystie @ 12/12/2006 3:50 PM EST
I totally remembered this. They were pretty good because it actually flavored the oatmeal instead just being slightly fruity/chocolately like regular “flavored” oatmeals.
I would’ve used Gushers instead of Fruit Rollups because they have the goo in them.
Does anyone ever try to draw using the frosting packets in the Pillsbury Toaster Steudels? I usually just end up spreading the frosting with a knife.
Speaking of “healthy” kids food like this, does anyone remember the various Hidden Valley Ranch for kids they put out in the early 90s also. Those were good. I know it made me eat salads. Came in Super Creamy, Taco, Pizza and Cheesy Nacho.
Grinch is on tonite on ABC.
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JLAJRC @ 12/12/2006 4:32 PM EST
I hate oatmeal, but love the concept of breafast art. This is the reason why my freezer always has Toasters Strudels inside. I am a Toaster Strudel master artisan. Although I swear I never can get ALL of the icing out of that little plastic packet.
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Old E @ 12/12/2006 4:34 PM EST
I remember that commercial. I still hate oat meal.
I thought Six was hot. She has a really great ass for a white chick.
And what the hell is that kid in the blue doing? Having a seizure?
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Darth Galvatron @ 12/12/2006 4:51 PM EST
Hey Matt, has the Amazon list worked for you in the past? Any readers ever bought you stuff? Also, if you get stuff this year, can you tell in advance?
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Terror Claws Cole @ 12/12/2006 4:56 PM EST
Oh my god! Thank you so much for posting this! I keep having recollections of oatmeal with strawberry swirled in, and I could never remember what it was from. Now I know for sure. Yay :) I love your website so much!
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Anousenka @ 12/12/2006 5:06 PM EST
I’m glad your oatmeal didn’t eat you, Matt.
(I think we all should’ve gotten together to get him the PacMan game. Sounds like his apartment is getting too grown up.)
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Katherine @ 12/12/2006 5:45 PM EST
I don’t know if someone has already mentioned this, but it looks like someone from FARK found the Star Wars Holiday Special on YouTube.
http://www.youtube.com/watch%3...0%26mode%3Drelated%26search%3D
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Ben @ 12/12/2006 6:41 PM EST
12/12 Advent entry is up…now working on a blog entry that my computer ate a few hours ago.
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Matt @ 12/12/2006 8:55 PM EST
A couple of things.
1: I am convinced now that The Boss is either the Mare or the Santa from one of the old calenders.
2: Kuse is the worst dad ever.
3: Legotron is quickly becoming my favorite character. He and Mistah Snowman need to be in their own spinoff.
4: James Lipton is becoming my favorite new character. (I’m not sold on the Tiger yet)
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Kev @ 12/12/2006 8:57 PM EST
Liz - I remember those…but I don’t remember the name either. Damn it.
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canoesforshoes @ 12/12/2006 9:01 PM EST
Ugh. Matt, I can’t believe you resorted to the old cut-away-and-leave-the-incredible-reveal-to-the-imagination trick with Tigerboy.
Don’t get me wrong, I still love the calendar, I just feel a little cheated, is all.
Then again, you don’t have to write anything at all, so I guess I should appreciate whatever we get.
So thanks, I guess.
What was I talking about again?
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Rhino @ 12/12/2006 9:04 PM EST
Rhino, it’s just that you weren’t ready to hear what Tigerboy said.
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Matt @ 12/12/2006 9:07 PM EST
Fair enough.
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Rhino @ 12/12/2006 9:09 PM EST
I’m also loving Legotron this season, Kev. I hope he snags one more head before Christmas.
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Jor-El @ 12/12/2006 9:12 PM EST
Liz and Canoes… are you guys talking about String Thing? I used to use those snacks as insanely long riplines for G.I Joes. Fruit was fun back then.
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Old E @ 12/12/2006 9:26 PM EST
Eurgh, more off-screen antics? I think the picture of the teeter-totter thingy made up for it, though.
I think The Boss is a Mare, too. I believe I see flipped hair.
Jor-El, I agree about Legotron and I want it to be James Lipton’s head. Because wacky antics are sure to ensue.
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Katherine @ 12/12/2006 9:27 PM EST
Old E - Yeah, String Thing. I’d just found it, took a lot of googling. I wish I’d just waited for your post, I’m lazy. Thanks for the help
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canoesforshoes @ 12/12/2006 9:37 PM EST
Do you guys know about the joy of Build-A-Bear workshops? Sure, they’re just milking money out of parents, if you’re gonna be cynical about it. But dammit if they don’t make a cool present to give to your family and friends. And then you can just buy them new clothing for whatever gift-giving occasion comes up. The gift that keeps you from having to think for at least a year 
Plus, I just got one from my aunt. Hello Kitty, baby!! I dunno how they got the license, but I don’t care. I just had to have a Hello Kitty. Cause that’s how I roll.
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K- @ 12/12/2006 10:12 PM EST
My brother and I used to eat Oatmeal Swirlers all the time!!! We also had Oatmeal with some kind of dissolving things with surprises inside. Like a big ball of sugar or whatever and a gummy treat inside, and when you put the water/milk in the oatmeal, the outside would dissolve and leave the thing. I’m thinking it had gummy dinosaurs inside, but it could have been teddy bears or something else. Hmm…maybe it was teddy bears. I forget.
Also, does anybody else remember cookies called “Giggles”? They had laughing faces on them, and I’m pretty sure they were “sandwich cookies” like Oreos. I think one side was vanilla and one side was chocolate, but maybe I just took them apart and mashed them together that way.
Anyways, I got in trouble once for eating a whole bunch of them because my dad had gotten tired of us asking for a snack and said, “Eat everything in the pantry, I don’t care!!!!!” I had not learned the meaning of sarcasm, and thus I thought we actually had permission to eat the whole package of Giggles.
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Lilly @ 12/12/2006 10:13 PM EST
Okay, I just finished actually reading the Oatmeal Swirlers article and see that Matt has previously reviewed the hatching Dinosaur Egg oatmeal…I’m pretty sure we had an earlier version when I was a kid. Now I’m pretty convinced the old version must have been teddy bears, since the newer version uses dinosaurs.
My brain gets confused sometimes. Does anybody else remember animals hatching in their oatmeal? Anybody?
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Lilly @ 12/12/2006 10:18 PM EST
Oatmeal Swirlers is one of the few “gimmick” food items Matt’s reviewed that we ate all the time, in large quantaties. Oatmeal was cheap, filling, and plentiful, even the Swirlers, and my mother figured anything that would get her daughters to eat it was a good thing. Though I DON’T remember the double-swirl packets…
Uh-oh. I’m glad Knacks and Tigerboy are having fun (this may be one of the few times the LEGO calender’s present was cooler), but…who’s minding the baby (not to mention the remaining calender)?
And where do you keep getting the mini-food? Snaring them from random nieces?
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starwenn @ 12/12/2006 10:19 PM EST
Lilly, here ya go!
http://www.x-entertainment.com/messages/583.html
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K- @ 12/12/2006 10:21 PM EST
May be the boss is the Lego Santa from last year.
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Kowl @ 12/12/2006 10:24 PM EST
Today’s advent calendar is my favorite entry by far! I’m totally into it -the mystery of “the boss” the chili powder in the sausage gravy and other references, furries…though I have to admit, the baby-goo weirds me out. Other than that I’m so there.
Lilly - there used to be oatmeal where the things would dissolve and gummy bears were inside. I used to eat it at my grandma’s house, so there’s a good chance it was a relic.
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canoesforshoes @ 12/12/2006 10:48 PM EST
“But Scrooged had nipples!” = awesome.
Lilly- you are not crazy, my husband was telling me he used to get the oatmeal with teddy bears in them. He said something about them hiding until you add water to the oatmeal and they float up to the top.
Maybe it’s because I’m a Mother, but I worry about Box, he’s gonna be missing till the 15th! Thats a long friggin time!
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IHAQ @ 12/12/2006 10:54 PM EST
Lilly! Yes! Oatmeal with Dinosaurs! Yes! I miss that! Jeez!
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Katherine @ 12/12/2006 10:58 PM EST
[b]K-[/b] Thanks for the Giggles link!! I suppose I could have been less lazy and actually searched for it myself! Somehow the faces look more creepy now.
Thanks to everyone else also for assuring me that I’m not crazy for remembering eating bears in my oatmeal. Ya’ll are good people.
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Lilly @ 12/12/2006 11:37 PM EST
I know it was mentioned above, but Matt, you absolutely HAVE to write-up the advent calendar video game made by Nintendo. How often does something this cool come along? You play as a snowman named Chubby, and you jump on these brightly colored retarded penguins. I am pretty sure the meaning of Christmas is in that sentence somewhere.
http://www.mission-in-snowdriftland.com
(This was my first post here, ever. I only did it to beg for Nintendo love. Pathetic!)
Oh my dear sweet jesus.
I had to have a bowl of that every single day before school or I refused to go.
I miss it daily, time to time, I still look for it in the store.
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redsweater @ 12/14/2006 1:20 AM EST
Way to go with the formal language, Matt–as a discerning professional (not really) seeking quality writing talent, I approve and I’m willing to hire you.
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Mistah Mon @ 12/16/2006 9:48 PM EST
I loved this stuff, the strawberry flavor was the best. Much better than the candy dinosaur egg things. Never had a problem with the amount of the icing stuff either, always just right. I really should make a list of things I would like to eat again. Starting with magic middle cookies and those turtle pudding things that turned your tongue green.
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Elizabeth @ 01/09/2007 12:52 PM EST
That guy on the Oatmeal Swirlers box reminds me of “La Linea” from The Great Space Coaster. Those cartoons with the guy that was just a single line, and talked in gibberish/Italian?
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Jeffrey Gray @ 01/14/2007 6:27 PM EST
I liked the oatmeal with freeze dried gummi bears that never fully became rehyrdated when you made the oatmeal. It was like eating breakfast at a Mr. Bulky’s that hasn’t restocked anything for about 5 months.
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zacwax @ 01/18/2007 1:38 AM EST
Ew. The picture of your attempt at making oatmeal swirlers with melted fruit roll-ups looks like the blood-laced oatmeal the bad guys tried to feed to the golden child in the aptly titled film The Golden Child.
Sardo,
Numspa
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peter @ 02/06/2007 11:53 AM EST
HOLY CRAP I/you FOUND IT
everytime i have the raspberry cheesecake at olive garden, my mind gets lost in the nostalgia of trying to place where i”ve tasted that raspberry flavor before
it WAS my past
not the yumy toaster struddels
but rather
oatmeal swirlers
thank you, thank you
my tongue can now enjoy the cake in peace
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Jennifer Keele @ 02/06/2007 4:56 PM EST
Oh, sweet! I love regular oatmeal, but I never forgot Oatmeal Swirlers. You’re right, the steaming hot oatmeal did melt your creations — the bowl in the commercial must’ve been ice cold.
Now if you could only find the Fruit Slush commercial, I’d jump for joy.
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Draca @ 02/08/2007 3:29 AM EST
Actually, if you wanted to melt down fruit roll-ups, I would bet an amount of money that Everclear would do it. I’ve melted a few fruit products into it, and produced from a pretty close facsimile of fruit goo,(which I decided needed a bit more everclear,) to fruit flavored shots. And, I bet it would make eating the oatmeal a hell of a lot more fun!
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Rapideth @ 02/09/2007 12:48 AM EST
Perhaps instead of melted fruit rollups, you’d be better off using that icing gel for cakes and cookies?
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cole @ 02/09/2007 9:34 AM EST
UGH! The picture of melting the fruit roll up made me want to puke. Get over it, man, the 90s are over.
The comment about the cake icing gel stuff sounds like it would look like the oatmeal swirlers goo, but that stuff doesn’t have any flavor. It would probably also be easier to draw with in the little squeeze tube it comes in, more so than squeezing a packet. Some places that sell cake decorating and candy supplies sell this flavoring oil made my LorAnn (or something). They have all kinds of flavors. A drop of that will add the fake fruity flavor you’re missing out on. The flavoring comes in a tiny little bottle, but don’t let the size fool you, that stuff is bangin.
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cyn @ 02/13/2007 10:21 PM EST
What about a fruit glaze? It is just sugar and juice, so it seems like the taste would be similar…
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nomad380 @ 03/18/2007 6:50 AM EST
Hey Matt I have found a way although obscenely time consuming to recreate the magical experience of oatmeal swirlers. to do so one must take their favorite jelly microwave it for 20-30 seconds, until its a liquidy goo but not a piping hot runny slime, than simply poor into a ziplock bag, squish the air out, seal and cut a tiny hole in the corner to act as the tear slit, and bida bing oatmeal swirlers live again, and for choclate simply use your fav choc syrup
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rob @ 04/17/2007 5:40 PM EDT
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