The History of X-E’s Advent Calendar.

Well, it’s almost time for the fifth annual X-Entertainment Advent Calendar. I’ve at times tried to write a summary of the entire story, but it never quite pans out — if it seems confusing to me, surely it’d be too confusing for those who haven’t been reading for the PAST FIVE YEARS.

Let me give it a shot: Every year, the Playmobil toy company releases an “Advent Calendar” playset. It contains many things, but it especially contains many living, breathing action figures named Mare Winningham, who bear no strong relation to the real Mare Winningham, but look just like her.

Mares are born evil, but they don’t have to stay that way. After a wild and destructive romp in 2003, teenagers Knacks and Kuse, taken with the legend of Mare, dug up her gruesome remains and used voodoo tricks to resurrect her. Literally born again, this chief Mare (who in reality is just one of many, many Mares — all clones, see) softened and became good friends with her teenage saviors. In 2004, the trio enjoyed sushi and the many fruits of that year’s Advent Calendar, ultimately saving Santa Claus, and by extension, Christmas itself.

Sadly, Mare sacrificed her own life for that good deed — but don’t fret! With a little Christmas magic, the thought-to-be-unrelated Mare that sprung off the 2005 Advent Calendar remembered her roots and fought for the forces of good once more. Now a brunette, Mare and the typically downtrodden Kuse (who was born without facial features and was ultimately given a new face, albeit an ugly, gray, scarred face, from Santa Claus) forged a romantic relationship, and Christmas was saved once more.

And that’s just the tip. There are evil Mares. There are LEGO Advent Calendars. There’s an unscrupulous fellow named “Waiterbot,” who is essentially a talking brain who can commandeer the body of anyone who gets too close to his hollow head. There are new Santa Clauses, year after year, some good, some evil. There’s even a bit player with eight heads all stacked one right on top of the other.

When we last saw our friends, things were good. Mare and Kuse were enjoying their honeymoon period. Knacks got to ride in Santa’s sleigh. Waiterbot and his bride, Waiterbetty, joined forces with the heroes for no readily apparent reason. But, things change quick in Advent Calendarland, and until it’s time, there’s just no telling what trials, what horrors and what mayhem our friends might face.

It all starts December 1st. Know your history by reading the previous installments…

X-E Advent Calendars Of The Past!
2002200320042005

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148 Responses to The History of X-E’s Advent Calendar.

  1. Ready ready ready ready ready. Ready for Advent! I can’t take it!

  2. Tutsuro says:

    The new design is killer. I took a screen shot of it. I mean, Charlie Brown, X-E, Chevy Chase. It’s art.

    Wait, kingklash..is this the same kingklash as “Kingklash-kickin’ the tires, lightin’the fires”? I can’t remember what that was, but I love saying it.

  3. Tutsuro says:

    Following a google search, I realizes its the other way around, “kickin’ the fires and lightin’ the tires”. Makes less sense, but its still…bitchin….to say.

  4. Katherine says:

    So… if Matt is half as anxious as Greg/Jessica Marie/me the first Advent will be posted late tonight, right? Right?!

  5. Yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes.
    Yesyes.

  6. pdac says:

    good job on the background. it looks great

  7. Mystie says:

    This whole Wii thing is just a devious plot by Nintendo to sell people their new Wiisurance!

  8. Bill says:

    http://norma.fam-lee.net/index.php?name=UpDownload&req=getit&lid=41

    Here we go. I think the last link was buggy. Anywho…here is a musical genius. I am in no way making fun of her, I am having fun with her:D. Please enjoy and merry Christmas. Can’t wait for Knacks and Kuse!

  9. Cotter says:

    Matt,

    I hope you caught the Christmas themed Peanut specials on Tuesday. Also, what happened to the christmas lights background? I liked the look…

  10. Cameron T. says:

    Terror Claws Cole:

    Ebay???

    try http://www.bricklink.com

  11. Matt says:

    Cotter: I thought the green background was pushing it a bit into “too much” territory, but that’s up for debate!

  12. Rhino says:

    TOO MUCH CHRISTMAS!?!

    Matt, Matt, Matt… There ain’t no such thing, man.

  13. Matt says:

    Ok I so knew that was coming. :)

  14. K- says:

    Is Lars going to arrest me for downloading this, Bill? 😛

    Whoa, whoa, whoa, 19 minutes? Guh-huh? Who is she the Allman Brothers? No, it’s 5 minutes of song and 14 minutes of dead air. Who uploaded this mp3? More of her quirky charm? 😛

  15. Mystie says:

    Terror Claws – I guess the Cap’n didn’t make enough of his cereal this year, because my Wal-Mart has been out of Christmas Crunch for a week or two. But Hostess has a $3 off rebate for the Rudolph DVD if that helps at all.

  16. Muppet Baby says:

    Wow- the site looks great! I am SO PUMPED for the calendar this year! “Tomorrow is Christmas- it’s practically here!” Well, ok tomorrow is Dec. 1st. Still, an exciting day!

    I haven’t found any Christmas Crunch cereal either- only holiday Froot Loops and Holiday Rice Krispies. Blech.

  17. Darth Poop says:

    I’m so jazzed; I have advent calendars this year so I can play along, hooray!

  18. Carri says:

    Just saw a whole display of Christmas Crunch at my local Kmart. It looked liked they shipped their whole supply to the one location that almost no one would purchase it from.

  19. Sami says:

    Oh man can’t wait.

  20. Terror Claws Cole says:

    Mystie-
    Thanks!

    I’ll use that as a backup in case I can’t find the crunch. Thanks for the bricklink also, Cam. Well, I’ll check the K-Mart when I can…we’ve had a 10 inch snow storm all day! PLUS: it makes it SOOO much more Christmassy. NEGATIVE: Can’t get out to class or to buy Christmas Crunch. I need a minimum of two boxes to make it to the 25th.

    Thanks for the help gang!

  21. I had planned to go out and buy my own advent calendar (just because the pieces are so damned cute!) but I’m snowed in! YAY! SNOW!

    kingklash and ChibiSoma: How deep is your snow?! It’s only up to my ankles. I heard it’s knee-deep in Lawton?

    My favorite thing about the new calendar layout… LEG LAMP!

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