I’m taking what’s become my traditional “Wednesday off” from doing a Countdown entry, because I’m tired and useless and all that jazz. Instead, here’s something that I thought would’ve made for a perfect Countdown post, but there just wasn’t enough for me to say about it beyond AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME.
I know that “Living Dead Dolls” have a pretty poignant poser punk pseudogoth stain on them; at the same time, they’re really cool and they make me wish I wasn’t in my sixties. For those unaware, the collection consists of well made (speaking both of materials and craftsmanship) “baby dolls,” all vamped up to look like corpses, psychos, slashers or all of the above. If you can get past the visions of misguided little girls in Sad Emily shirts carrying these things around the back aisles of bookstores, they’re really nice display pieces, assuming you have a place in your home private enough to display baby dolls with blood all over them.
As a special promotion at last year’s Comic-Con, Jason Voorhees became a Living Dead Doll. I wasn’t there, but apparently, the only people who bought the dolls at Comic-Con did so with intentions of an eBay mark-up. Normally, I’d balk, but for baby Jason? Hells bells, yo.
The neatest thing about the Jason Living Dead Doll is that it specifically references our hero’s look in Friday the 13th Part 3. They could’ve just as easily made him more generic — hockey mask and black shoes, not that he doesn’t have those — and totally gotten away with it. It was definitely made with hardcore fans of the series in mind, which makes sense, because only hardcore fans of the series would pay up to and over fifty bucks for a Jason Voorhees Living Dead Doll.
I loved the way Jason looked in Parts 3 & 4, and I’m really glad that they didn’t explore his later, zombie years. Every detail is correct — he’s got the right clothes in the right colors, and there’s even a big mask gash from the axe Jason took to the head at the end of the film.
The doll comes with Jason’s machete, which is also nice and bloody, but I couldn’t get the thing to actually fit in the doll’s hand. I guess they never expected people to open the boxes, because then they’re worth NOTHING, absolutely NOTHING! Pish and a posh and a 1-2. More incredible is that the mask is removable, revealing a baby-faced Jason Voorhees that increases the likelihood that I’ll kiss something today by 10,000%.
Everything about the doll is just…right. The box utilizes the right color scheme and font; the doll utilizes the right color scheme and, uh, feet. Knowing that my eternal love for all things Jason isn’t something shared by every X-E reader, I should also mention that there’s an Edward Scissorhands Living Dead Doll.
Great doll, great thing, great big waste of money that I don’t regret. I’ve always wondered what Jason’s ass looked like, and now I know. I’m schooled.
On another note, in yesterday’s Countdown entry, I got all whiny about how Toys ‘R” Us stores aren’t organized like they used to be; particularly that they’ve switched out the supermarket-style aisles for randomly placed standees. Well, I went to my local TRU for the first time in weeks tonight, and what do I find? Supermarket aisles. Wow. I don’t know if it was a mandate from HQ or one specific manager’s decision, but if yours is doing the same, and you’re around the same age as me, go there now. Holy memories. I was five-years-old again. Everyone was giving me lollipops.
Posted by Matt. E-mail me!
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Hellz ya!!! That is by far the coolest thing I have seen today I need one now. Off to Ebay