There were some toys I grew up with that just felt Halloweeny even if they technically weren’t so, and you’ll be seeing a few of them on this year’s Countdown. Oh, look, there’s one of them now! Rude Ralph joins the party, bringing lots of orange hair and the ability to make burping sounds. The doll meant a lot to me as a kid, I guess because it had orange hair and the ability to make burping sounds.
I haven’t been sleeping enough. I’m not really having trouble sleeping so much as I’m just consistently going to sleep way too late. That makes the mornings tough. When I get off the bus and take the short subway ride into Times Square, I get off the train so groggy and generally incoherent that, on average, I bump into five total strangers who hiss at me as a general response. Today, head held down and eyes red as blood, I stumbled down the usual paths only to find myself in the midst of well-dressed women and three dozen shiny dancing stars.
(click here to watch them go!!!!)
The people behind Dancing With The Stars were promoting the hell out of their show today, having hired a seeming army of otherwise normal people to dress in these ridiculous star-shaped gold costumes and prance around the streets. They were out there for hours, and they were everywhere. When I went back out for lunch around 1, they were in the streets, on top of signs, in stores — MADNESS I tells ya. I’ve seen plenty of ludicrous promotional displays since beginning an office job in Times Square, but three dozen men and women dressed as Super Mario invincibility power-ups might take the cake.
Going back to the Rude Ralph topic for a moment, I found a new plaything that follows suit with Ralph’s ability to be kind of Halloweeny and kind of like a ball.
It’s the Halloween “playground ball,” known in most circles as a “kickball.” So orange and bouncy. There are a few different styles available, but nothing as natural as this here jack o’ lantern, who will smile no matter how much you beat the shit out of him. Barring needlepoint, his resolve is unbreakable. Having this makes me wish I was physically active enough to get my leg four inches off the ground without whining that it hurts.
Posted by Matt. E-mail me!
Ghosted by 
Nickelodeon- Wowzers, I am so so jealous of you right now!!!