It's been a long week, and since they always have the best cereals, I thought I'd end it with a trip to Target. And because I'm a hot soccer Mom on the go. While there, I waltzed into the toy section and tried my darndest to look like I was buying a gift for a small child and was in no way, shape or form shopping for myself. I was doing okay at that for a while, but once I hit the clearance racks, giddy exuberance blew my cover and let everyone in the store know that I am a tried and true loser.

Red stickers marked "2.48" are enough to get me to buy just about anything, but what the sticker belonged to was a toy I'd been using as masturbation material for months. It was a King Kong figure, from the same series as that awesome bug set I reviewed back in March. There was no King Kong figure in that set, but he was a part of this red tag glory set. That's not why I bought it, though. Fuck the monkey; I came for the giant piranha.

This "Kong Vs. Piranhadon" action figure set is just one of the many cases of Piranhadon sightings in the world of the Jacksonized King Kong. I've seen Piranhadons mentioned in the associated books, here on the toys, production sketches, blah blah blah. I'm wondering if there's a cut scene involving a Kong-eating Piranhadon somewhere on the extended DVD. Can anyone confirm or crush my dreams?

There are a few plusses and minuses regarding the set. I appreciate Kong's headlock-into-noogies wrestling pose and the fact that Piranhadon's "razor sharp teeth" really bite, but with the way both figures are permanently situated, they look damned ridiculous if they're doing anything but beating each other up.

The Kong revival failed to spark any real level of interest in kids, at least in as far as getting them to want Kong-related things. The toys were bought mostly as gifts by adults who didn't know the children they were buying toys for very well. "Oh, there's King Kong. And there's Donatello. And there's Triple H. Well, I know who King Kong is." The toy series was dead long before it hit clearance racks, but now that it has, I can finally meet my destiny and add a Piranhadon to my Tank of Undersea Gloom, which is really just a plastic box filled with fish-related action figures laying on the bottom shelf of my TV unit.