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Back from Disney with unrelated article!

As mentioned in the last thread, I spent the past week in Disney World, and we had an excellent time. Sentimentality surely a power to be reckoned with, I'd probably give the Magic Kingdom the nod for bestest out of the four Disney parks. Gets trickier from there. As Disney at large is mostly dry, Epcot might have to nab the #2 slot if only because it's an absolute blast-to-get-blasted in the World Showcase and roam from Japan to Mexico and need to piss at both countries. Going to give MGM the #3 spot, because it's small but with a high concentration of great rides and attractions, and probably the best overall vibe at nighttime. Very surprisingly, Animal Kingdom ranks last. Doesn't mean I didn't like it, just that it ranks last. It's a lot of work to have fun in Disney, but it seemed to take the most work at Animal Kingdom.

Also, I mentioned that we were going to stay at two hotels. We started at the Polynesian, which immediately became one of my favorite hotels ever. Wonderfully dated but meticulously cared for, the hotel is practically a relic and its bars sold "Wasabi Mary" cocktails that made me giddy. We ended at the Grand Floridian, which is ridiculously expensive and in retrospect a waste of money, as I hated the hotel and kept thinking I was going to spot two little twin girls chopped up as I grudgingly traded in my Polynesian paradise for strolls down mock Victorian halls that made me feel all embarrassed to think it was up my alley. I mean, I'd just left a group of folks who managed to start every conversation with "ALOHA!" without ever once seeming not into it, and then here was the big fancy place, filled with snotnose goaty people. But that's an overall minor gripe: Disney f'n rocked.

I took a zillion pictures. I mean it, a zillion. And I've spent some of today looking them over, trying to figure how to assemble the best moments into an article. Think it's going to have to be some kind of "Top Things" list, because if I try to go from Minute One To Minute Infinity, you won't be reading about it until the park closes in 2078.

While I figure that out, here's a shorter article that I started before the trip. Another batch of commercials, but really special ones that advertised specific products, with either the products featured or the way the products were featured being too absurd and fascinating to keep to myself. Read about it here, and download the commercials while you're there.

I'm cracking my knuckles like a real man. I think I need another week off, this time just to atrophy.

Posted by Matt on 05/28/2006. E-mail me!



Discussion Thread: 155 comments

hate to ruin it for you… but Bucky isn’t dead. He’s returned in the Comics.

Chestnuts roasted by Joker @ 05/30/2006 5:22 PM


Tim,

You are correct, Clarks neighbors in NL Christmas Vacation are wearing the suits. Good call, can’t remember if they are silver or black but I do remember the scene, that was just before Clark "fixed" his lights and set the neighborhood a blaze with 100,000 italian twinkle lights!

Chestnuts roasted by Tigerfan55600 @ 05/30/2006 5:43 PM


Yep, Bucky’s return was a major plotline in the current Captain America comic. His name is "Winter Soldier" now.

It used to be that Bucky and Uncle Ben (from Spider-Man) would be the two characters who would never return from the dead… Bucky’s been back for over a year, and Ben… well… there’s hints that he’s coming back. The real deal or a clone? Who knows.

Chestnuts roasted by David Silva @ 05/30/2006 5:49 PM


Of course the sad irony of the Slim Jeans is they aren’t available in size XL.

Chestnuts roasted by Dave @ 05/30/2006 6:54 PM


Also, Jason Todd was another character who stayed dead for quite a long time.
He was the Robin who died in A Death in the Family.
Ironically on the back of the trade paperback, Batman Editor Denny O’Neil is quoted as saying, "It would be a really sleazy stunt to bring him back."
Couldn’t agree more.

Chestnuts roasted by Joker @ 05/30/2006 7:52 PM


Lemurcat-
"Just about every bad horror story ever written."

That explains it. I don’t feel quite as uncultured now, although I’m still a hick at heart. I’m more of a sci-fi or fantasy guy myself. That’s TWO genres, not one, for you nimrods who think they’re the same thing.

Mostly the "horror" I’ve read has mostly been Stephen King- and that mostly looking for Dark Tower references. Plus, the Dark Tower is more of a sci-fi and fantasy mash-up than horror. It’s not that I haven’t tried the stuff; I’ve suffered through H.P Lovecraft and Dean Koontz books. I usually lose interest and go read about spaceships or dragons instead.

Spoodles-

You’ve read about character deaths because Matt’s comment board mercilessly removes spoiler spaces. I tried to include some in my earlier post, and it was automatically deleted.

So how ’bout it Matt? You going to fix it so we can include spoiler spaces?

Not sure what the next movie that will have a big X-E following is, but it’s nice to discuss movies with people of the same demographic. Also, people here don’t try to act like professional critics. Also, most of us are casual fans of the same sorts of media, rather than rabid fan boys of a single comic/game/tv series/movie/what-have-you.

Chestnuts roasted by spaz307 @ 05/30/2006 8:09 PM


Spaz, too many spaces will break the page boundaries. Hit return/enter a few times instead and you’ll have plenty of room to play. Besides, your post had a warning, I’m guessing Sproo was referring more to posts like Jessica Marie’s that jumped straight into spoiler without any kind of preamble.
Personally I drop off the web completely if there’s something I truly care about having spoiled, but it’s nice to have a choice about it when the topic turns to movies I haven’t seen yet. It’s fun to be tempted to skip past that big WARNING.
Next movie I’m most excited about is Nacho Libre, then Marie Antoinette. A Scanner Darkly seems interesting but I don’t think it’ll turn out particularly great. I’m guessing Superman will be the hottest topic.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 05/30/2006 8:37 PM


I saw X-MEN 3 (the midnight showing no less) and may I applaud all of you on your analysis. There is nothing really I can add except these 2 points: First, the movie reminded me of Batman and Robin(although not nearly as bad) in that you could tell that it would be the last totally overblown spectacle and that the next one would be more grassroots (like the beginning of BATMAN BEGINS). The next X-Men movie will probably have few of the original mutants opting instead for the low cost nobody who played Colossus, etc.

Second, the whole X-Men movie trilogy reminds me of Renton and Sickboy’s conversation in TRAINSPOTTING. "It’s not bad but it’s not great either. And while you tell yourself it’s not bad you know in your heart it’s really just shite."
Yep.

Chestnuts roasted by The Manimal @ 05/30/2006 9:23 PM


Actually, I did hit the return key a few times. The extra lines were just automatically removed.

Also, I noticed I used the word mostly three times in one sentence in my last post. Thankfully there’s no grammar nazis here. My English teachers would have had a collective heart attack.

Chestnuts roasted by spaz307 @ 05/30/2006 10:53 PM


My bad; maybe the best format would be *WARNING* + one return. Sorry for the name typo too :)
I checked out Fandango and refreshed my mind on some of the other flicks I’m excited for: Prarie Home Companion, Strangers with Candy (finally!), The Devil Wears Prada, The Lady in the Water (I liked The Village, so I’ve got hopes), all the no brainers like Clerks 2, Pirates and SoaP and finally The Black Dahlia in September. I read that one over the long weekend ’cause I’ve had it sitting around and wanted to read it before I was influenced by the casting. Now that I’ve checked who’s in it I’m doubly excited.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 05/31/2006 12:43 PM


Squee:

I’m glad somebody else out there is looking forward to Strangers With Candy. It’s one of my favorite shows of all time, and I almost died when it was originally pulled off of release schedules last summer.

I was hesitant about Clerks 2, but I heard it got an eight-minute standing ovation at Cannes. So it has the support of some artsier folks.

Chestnuts roasted by Spoodles @ 05/31/2006 7:52 AM


Saw X3 yesterday. I honestly think that the strong script saved the film from Ratner’s habit of treating everything he does, to a greater or lesser extent, like a music video for MTV. It’s as though looking cool is his only priority, and if something looks cool enough, he doesn’t need to justify it by means of plot or logic. Mind you, the first thing that managed to jar me out of my fan-bliss was this:

*Spoiler, I guess, even though it was in the previews and everything.*

The point where Magneto decided that the most expedient way of getting several dozen mutants to an island that’s literally only a couple of miles offshore is to steal the Golden Gate Bridge. I mean, damn, Mags. Was that really necessary? You can’t tell me there weren’t any boats around. I saw them. While you were sailing overhead on your hundred thousand ton magic carpet. And if taking a boat was too prosaic for you, you didn’t even have to get it in the water. You could have flown it with your magnetic powers and everything. I’m just saying.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 05/31/2006 8:48 AM


~SPOILER~

~SPOILER~

~SPOILER~

~SPOILER~

Ah, Jedoc …. that would be utterly lacking in style. You know Magneto, why do something simply when you can make a spectacule of it?

Anyway, broke down and spent the $5 for what will undoubtedly prove to be a crappy bootleg copy for further analysis. Yes, I’m that guy (girl) when it comes to certain movies. Can’t help it.

Chestnuts roasted by LemurCat @ 05/31/2006 9:28 AM


Uhh, Shootin’ Second Solo? Excuse me for quoting a t-shirt, but HAN SHOT FIRST.

Chestnuts roasted by Zack_Shadowtail @ 05/31/2006 10:21 AM


I was about to ridicule your "Han shot first" theory with an in-depth conspiracy analysis including discussion of a "magic blaster bolt" and a possible second shooter on the sandy knoll, but a quick google reveals that several other people already have websites devoted to the topic. I am so ashamed.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 05/31/2006 11:45 AM


Lincoln shot first!

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 05/31/2006 12:51 PM


It has also come to my attention that not only did somebody else independently duplicate my "Cheney Shot First" shirt, which I considered more or less inevitable, but it was Sore Thumbs, one of the stupidest comics on the web. Mine has loads more class, though.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 05/31/2006 2:56 PM


Han didn’t shoot "first". Han fired the only shot, and killed greedo, who didn’t shoot.

Therefore, simply, Han Shot.

QED

Chestnuts roasted by Yet Another Matt @ 05/31/2006 6:21 PM


Yet Another Matt:

Golf Clap. Bravo….

BTW, I can’t wait to by the ORIGINAL VERSIONS of the Trilogy when they hit DVD.

Chestnuts roasted by Cameron T. @ 05/31/2006 7:22 PM


Psh. There’s no such thing as an "original version" on DVD. Real men do Laserdisc. 30 gloriously gleaming centimeters of space age technology, baby.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 05/31/2006 7:55 PM


Just because Clerks 2 got a standing ovation at Cannes does not mean that the average guy with a lowball sense of humor will enjoy it. Frankly, I worry that Kevin Smith is just cashing in on the mystique of the original, since it has been a while since one of his movies "hit." Also, there’s lots of movies that are adored at Cannes that I think are boring or downright bad.

On the plus side, there’s bound to be a Jay and Silent Bob part, and that will surely be funny. I just can’t get enough of those guys. I mean, "Jay’s Rap" from "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" is pure lyrical genius right? "Fuck fuck fuck, mother mother fuck, mother mother fuck fuck, mother fuck, mother fuck, noinch noinch noinch" is truly inspiring. I could only cuss like that in my fondest daydreams.

Kudos to LemurCat for figuring out the spoiler space thing. Like many things in life, I feel like an idiot for not thinking of it myself.

Chestnuts roasted by spaz307 @ 05/31/2006 8:40 PM


Jedoc:

You do know that the original versions ARE coming, right?

See this press release: http://www.lucasfilm.com/press/news/news20060504.html

Chestnuts roasted by Cameron T. @ 05/31/2006 9:09 PM


I’m glad they are finally coming out with the original versions, I’ve said all along they needed to be released on DVD but I don’t intend to buy them. As a set to tie in with the new trilogy, I’d rather have the versions I’ve already got. For historical reasons, the originals need to be out there, I just don’t really need to shell out cash for them.

Chestnuts roasted by dohopoki @ 05/31/2006 10:13 PM


Transformers movie pics http://www.jalopnik.com/cars/news/holy-spielberg-first-leaked-set-pics-from-transformers-live-action-movie-added-bonus-gms-probably-gonna-build-the-camaro-177491.php?server=71&id=157430120&secret=73eaaf08e1">here. Thought some might be interested, if you haven’t seen them all already.
I think too much spoiler space might be overkill, though safe is always better than sorry. I’m sure someone smarter than me could make some kind of argument about bandwidth or pixels or some other technical whatnot.
I don’t have huge expectations for Clerks 2, but Smith has quite the ear for dialogue no matter what other criticisms you can level. Ooh, speaking of dialogue, when the heck is Grindhouse coming out?
I was very creeped out by the lack of WTC and Empire State in that commercial but I thought about it more and decided the Liberty coin people just didn’t want any other landmarks stealing their thunder.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 05/31/2006 11:03 PM


hunnerth!
I as well really can’t expect Clerks II to impress me, but I will probably see it right away when it comes out. Which is the same day as Snakes on a Plane which I will see as well.

Chestnuts roasted by kb @ 06/01/2006 7:51 AM


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