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05/28/2006: Back from Disney with unrelated article!

As mentioned in the last thread, I spent the past week in Disney World, and we had an excellent time. Sentimentality surely a power to be reckoned with, I’d probably give the Magic Kingdom the nod for bestest out of the four Disney parks. Gets trickier from there. As Disney at large is mostly dry, Epcot might have to nab the #2 slot if only because it’s an absolute blast-to-get-blasted in the World Showcase and roam from Japan to Mexico and need to piss at both countries. Going to give MGM the #3 spot, because it’s small but with a high concentration of great rides and attractions, and probably the best overall vibe at nighttime. Very surprisingly, Animal Kingdom ranks last. Doesn’t mean I didn’t like it, just that it ranks last. It’s a lot of work to have fun in Disney, but it seemed to take the most work at Animal Kingdom.

Also, I mentioned that we were going to stay at two hotels. We started at the Polynesian, which immediately became one of my favorite hotels ever. Wonderfully dated but meticulously cared for, the hotel is practically a relic and its bars sold “Wasabi Mary” cocktails that made me giddy. We ended at the Grand Floridian, which is ridiculously expensive and in retrospect a waste of money, as I hated the hotel and kept thinking I was going to spot two little twin girls chopped up as I grudgingly traded in my Polynesian paradise for strolls down mock Victorian halls that made me feel all embarrassed to think it was up my alley. I mean, I’d just left a group of folks who managed to start every conversation with “ALOHA!” without ever once seeming not into it, and then here was the big fancy place, filled with snotnose goaty people. But that’s an overall minor gripe: Disney f’n rocked.

I took a zillion pictures. I mean it, a zillion. And I’ve spent some of today looking them over, trying to figure how to assemble the best moments into an article. Think it’s going to have to be some kind of “Top Things” list, because if I try to go from Minute One To Minute Infinity, you won’t be reading about it until the park closes in 2078.

While I figure that out, here’s a shorter article that I started before the trip. Another batch of commercials, but really special ones that advertised specific products, with either the products featured or the way the products were featured being too absurd and fascinating to keep to myself. Read about it here, and download the commercials while you’re there.

I’m cracking my knuckles like a real man. I think I need another week off, this time just to atrophy.


Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

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Discussion Thread: 155 comments

kb:

They made Clerks earlier, so you won’t have to choose! Clerks now opens up next to…Lady in the Water (it’ll get crushed, despite the different demographics)

Ghosted by Spoodles @ 06/01/2006 8:34 AM EDT


This is completely effin’ random, and usually I don’t do this sort of thing, but for Christ’s sake, I HATE PEOPLE. Me and my sister are trying to buy a house. We got the mortgage finalized, signed the contract of sale, gone on the physical expection, the whole deal. We’re 22 days out from closing. But the issue is … we have the biggest pain in the ass sellers. They’re kicking because we didn’t put 20% down — HELLO! This is Jersey, baby! I live in one of the most expensive counties in the country! NO ONE has 20% to put down on a house! That’s why there is 100% financing! Now it’s they don’t like that we have an FHA mortgage. Uh, you get your money regardless, bitches! I’ve about had it up to here with these f*cking people. They’re too lazy to put their gutters up properly. They’re too effin’ lazy to fix the flashing on their house, but goddamn it, they can piss and moan about my mortgage! And they’ve made remarks about "sabotage". Dumb f*cks. I’m kinda half-hoping they do something stupid like that just so I can sue them for everything they’ve ever thought of owning.

Ghosted by LemurCat @ 06/01/2006 12:04 PM EDT


Real estate transactions are some of the most stressful things you will ever endure. One of the worst things is that it’s so easy for everything to fall through in the blink of an eye. Our seller was an idiot, and as an idiot he hired the cheapest, dumbest realtor he could find who almost screwed up everything for us (he’d tell our agent that we needed to meet right away because his client needed to finalize the sale ASAP and offer all these incentives for us to do that, then we’d get there and he’d deny ever saying any of it. There were other things too.) Plus, after nearly 4 years in this house we’ve discovered dozens of annoying things the seller did (apparently he liked to bend nails instead of taking the time to hammer them all the way in, which makes it difficult when you have to take whatever it is down or replace it.) I really feel your pain. Let it out.

Ghosted by Lori @ 06/01/2006 1:51 PM EDT


SPOILER ALERT!
.
.
.
Your milk will go bad.
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.
You have been warned.

Ghosted by kingklash the curdled @ 06/01/2006 3:20 PM EDT


I remember those pants and that ad, but I could swear the one that ran here had a different announcer. The one that said "won ate hundraddd" for "1-800". Anyway, not that they take "MasterCharge". I still call it Mastercharge and it still confuses people.

Ghosted by klatubaradanikto @ 06/01/2006 3:43 PM EDT


LemurCat – I’ll sell you my house.
Good condition, gutters are fine, chimney doesn’t need repointing, fine stonework.

The only drawback is the location.

Scotland.

Interested?

Ghosted by Pete @ 06/01/2006 6:46 PM EDT


Frigging George Lucas! I already own the trilogy TWICE and I do not want to buy it again…although I will probably buy the MEGA Episode I – VI edition that is bound to come out someday…

Ghosted by Muppet Baby @ 06/01/2006 7:05 PM EDT


Are we to assume that the free ladies watch is only there so that she doesn’t feel so bad about her man wearing a cool, cool watch? Honestly, looks to me like the watch was not only created for men but there may be legal action taken if it’s worn by women.
Either that or when wearing your cool, cool, so useful watch you’re bound to attract lots of hot lady types. Give a free watch to the one you want to bring home with you for the night.
Can’t say that if I had that watch I wouldn’t want to wear it while wearing my Slim Jeans pants and free top and be an outer space guy. I’d fly around the Statue of Liberty in a hover car hoping to avoid fasionable aliens from planet leather. If they get in my hair though, I’ll use my watch to take them out. It counts seconds and aliens can;t deal with that.

Oh and to kingklash the curdled,
you make me chuckle.

Ghosted by Redlightbulbs is mighty lucky @ 06/01/2006 7:27 PM EDT


Actually, my fiancee DID do the whole "losing water weight by wrapping yourself with crap" thing during high school. He was a wrestler, and if they didn’t get back to their weight class by a certain period of time, then they didn’t compete. Yeah, it was totally unhealthy, but they did it anyways.

Ghosted by Sara @ 06/01/2006 8:36 PM EDT


Somebody showed Transformers pics up above. That got me thinking – don’t know if anyone else has seen them, but they have just released Star Wars Transformers.

Four of them : Vader/TIE, Luke/X-Wing, Grievous/Wheel Bike, Obi-Wan/Jedi Starfighter

http://www.hasbro.com/transformers/default.cfm?page=browse&catalog=1&keyword=star+
wars

Does anyone else remember these toylines ever crossing over? They actually look pretty cool – I mean, as cool as they could, I suppose.

They’d look good on a shelf if nothing else!

Ghosted by Ninj @ 06/01/2006 8:43 PM EDT


Don’t forget Bobba Fett / Slave II X-former.

Matt, have you seen the new superman capt crunch cereal? It turns the milk blue :P Got to be good for you. Not to mention the superman outfit that has a blower motor on it :P and the smashing gloves. Lots of hype for this "Superman Returns"

Ghosted by Wu Jen @ 06/01/2006 9:24 PM EDT


Ninj, Matt did a blog with pics of the Vader and Boba Transformers pretty recently.
I always find it really odd when people say "MasterCharge"! Without reigniting the Great Pop Debate, I’ve noticed it as mainly an Eastern/Southern thing.

Ghosted by squee4242 @ 06/01/2006 10:27 PM EDT


You mean the Great Soda Debate!

what am I saying, I’m on the pop side.

Ghosted by dohopoki @ 06/01/2006 10:54 PM EDT


My one problem with the new XXXMen flick was when Strorm was all like, "Are your going to be ready???" to Wolverine.

Of course the dude is ready… he’s fucking Wolverine…

Otherwise, great fuckin flick…

Ghosted by Review the World @ 06/02/2006 2:01 AM EDT


Kudos RTW. And what was up with Charles stepping to Wolvie? Chuck better recognize.

Ghosted by Knegative @ 06/02/2006 3:44 AM EDT


I really don’t like Epcot. Well, I haven’t been since they opened the Mission Space Ride, and I’ve never managed to ride Test Track, so all I’ve ever really done there is eaten and chucked ice at my friends. I also didn’t like how nobody at Epcot speaks English. None of them new what an arcade was.

MGM would be my second, a handful of good rides. And the Millionare play it is pretty flippin sweet.

Animal Kingdom has to be the worst Theme Park in Florida. It closes at like 5pm and because there is nothing to do you’ll leave at 3.

Ghosted by SabaTooTigga @ 06/02/2006 4:58 AM EDT


NOOO!!! Not the pop/soda/coke/fizz thing again.
There must be more fascinating things about each person’s local culture worth discussing.

Ghosted by kb @ 06/02/2006 8:44 AM EDT


It’s not how far you go but how go you far.

Ghosted by Scooter @ 06/02/2006 9:41 AM EDT


Anybody else want to hear Rob Zombie sing more KISS songs?

Ghosted by kingklash @ 06/02/2006 11:57 AM EDT


I actually liked Animal Kingdom when I was down there. And it was like right after it opened. It’s supposed to have a kick-ass coaster in it now, so I would imagine it’s even better. And they had lemurs, so that rocks pretty hard in my book.

I liked Epcot too, but wish they still had the old World of Imagination ride with Figment. Still have parts of that song lodged in the back of my head. I also liked "Drinkin’ Round the World". The rides in Norway and Mexico were pretty cool, from what I recall.

MGM was pretty cool, with the Star Wars and the Muppets and all that. But I still love the Magic Kingdom. I’m such a tool, I could spend hours putzing around Tom Sawyer Island.

I was having a good laugh, the last time I was down there I stayed at the Dixie Landings, which has since been renamed the Port Orleans Riverside. I guess that whole Antebellum South theme went poorly for ‘em. The Cast Members where never amused when I referred to the "Bayou" section as the Slave Shacks.

Ghosted by LemurCat @ 06/02/2006 12:28 PM EDT


Pretty much everything LemurCat mentioned will be in my Disney article(s), starting this weekend.

My girlfriend loved Animal Kingdom, and I did too…to an extent. The dinosaur-related stuff all rocked, but it didn’t really account for much. The animals were less close and less major than what I can see at a Six Flags safari, so while cool, it was nothing I’ll TREASURE FOREVER.

MGM just needs to build up more. It does get very nice at night there, though.

Ghosted by Matt @ 06/02/2006 1:03 PM EDT


Last time I went to disney we hit 3 parks in 3 days (disneyland epcot and disney mgm studios, I don’t think the animal kingdom was open yet). It was pretty fun but I only remember there being like only 1 ride at epcot (some ride thru the human body? I think) and it was the same ride I had gotten on at mgm (star wars) and it was the same exact ride except for the sounds and the video playing on the screen. Other than that all I did at epcot was play videogames all day. They had a building with nothing but sega genesis and sega saturn games in it and I spent hours in there only cuz there was nothing else for me to do! Oh and one of the breakdancing robot people was hitting on my mom. Shiny bastard.

Ghosted by PRSense @ 06/02/2006 1:20 PM EDT


Oh no he dis’ney!
Did you kick his shiny metal ass?

Ghosted by kingklash @ 06/02/2006 2:49 PM EDT


I love the Epcot, MGM, and the Magic Kingdom, in that order. But it’s been several years since I’ve been now, and I’m sure things have changed. We went to the Animal Kingdom last time and found it a bit boring–a good zoo would have been better–but still enjoyable. That was only a few years after it had opened, so I’m sure the Animal Kingdom park has expanded quite a bit by now.

Ghosted by Cameron T. @ 06/02/2006 5:56 PM EDT


kinglash-

Being a big Rob Zombie fan, I’m intrigued by your statement. When/where did he cover any Kiss songs?

Frankly, I think he could probably make a Michael Bolton tune sound kick ass. Ever compare the original "Boogie Man" to Zombie’s "Boogey Man?" If he wants to cover something, I’ll probably buy it.

Ghosted by spaz307 @ 06/02/2006 7:54 PM EDT


I know Electric Hellfire Club did a kick ass cover of Dr. Love!

KMFDM did a great cover of "Who Made Who" and "Material Girl" and "Mysterious Ways".

My Life with the Thrill Kill Kult did a cover of the Batman theme.

Covers are great, unless they suck!

Ghosted by kidneyboy @ 06/02/2006 10:54 PM EDT


also, 1000 Homo DJ’s did a great cover of the Black Sabbath song "Supernaut". 1000 Homo DJ’s is a side project of Al Jourgensen from Ministry.

When I saw Ministry in Milwaukee last year, the did Supernaut, and Rick Nielsen, the guitarist for Cheap Trick, got up on stage to play along.

Ghosted by kidneyboy @ 06/02/2006 11:58 PM EDT


I predict that in a thousand years, some poor archeologist is going to be trying to translate into whatever they’re going to be speaking in a thousand years. Binary. Whatever. Anyway, after working his entire life on the problem, and thinking that he’s just about to get a grip on our lexicon, he’s going to come across a discussion of contemporary music and the band names are going to completely destroy his translation system, and he’ll give up in despair. And it will all be on the shoulders of 1000 Homo DJs.

Ghosted by Jedoc @ 06/03/2006 7:24 AM EDT


Hey Matt, how did you like Everest? That’s the newest thing there right now. Man, I miss WDW… It’s been almost 7 years since my CM time as a Custodial.

Ghosted by Roddy @ 06/03/2006 9:17 AM EDT


I think that the places like this must be visited at least once in a month. wat say??

Ghosted by Bobby @ 06/03/2006 10:22 AM EDT


Jedoc, put that theory and apply sarcasm. It doesn’t even go over well on text today.

"archeologist Marmar made an incredible discovery today about the people of the 21st century. According to an acient digital scripture (or in their one syllable premitive language, "Blog" as they called it) it can now be deduced that people of that time thought that their raising fuel prices were in fact fantastic and that they loved it when their xbox 360’s (a stove like device) would break down."

Ghosted by dohopoki @ 06/03/2006 11:15 AM EDT


dohopoki: If I live to be a thousand, I’m going back to college to write my thesis on the ancient god "Aol," whose silvery totems can be found by the thousand at every level of society. Though the power and omnipresence of the deity cannot be denied, archaologists will debate hotly over what these totems, or "prayer discs," are supposed to be used for. The mainstream will merely suppose that they were some form of ornamentation, though highly vocal fringe groups will argue that they were meant to "deflect" ill fortune, while still allowing blessings through the central hole. Conspiracy theorists will claim that such a primitive society could never create artifacts of such apparent complexity and perfection, and that they were trade goods provided by visiting aliens in exchange for vital resources. However, recently uncovered photographic evidence (see: "Dead Rising" dig) suggests their use as ritual weapons. The world may never know.

Ghosted by Jedoc @ 06/03/2006 12:05 PM EDT


On a lighter note, I got the new Cosmo yesterday and it suggests brightening up your hair for summer by adding some Kool-Aid to your regular shampoo.

Ghosted by kb @ 06/03/2006 1:57 PM EDT


that would make some tasty hair. as if hair isn’t tasty enough.

Ghosted by trips @ 06/03/2006 2:36 PM EDT


It was on VH1’s Rock Honors show. The segments for each group honored (for those who didn’t see it) started with a tribute to the particular group consisting of a current band covering a song or two. For the Simmons’ Kaijuu Kabuki Rock And Roll Ensemble, the group was a one-time gathering of Scott Ian, Gilby Clarke, Slash, Tommy Lee, Rob Zombie, and surprise guest Ace Frehley. The whole show was pretty good, but the KISS segment was saved until last, and blasted the roof off the joint. Rob and Scott were the most animated of the goup, and just hearing Zombie sing "You’ve got something about you/ You’ve got something I need…." and wearing a leather jacket with a ribcage printed on it was cheese-pizza-without-the-pizza cool! You guys ought to catch it when it airs again.

Ghosted by kingklash @ 06/03/2006 2:39 PM EDT


SNT? I still haven’t found the Ecto replacement :/

Ghosted by Eddie Lightning Frog @ 06/03/2006 5:13 PM EDT


If I may make a bold pronouncement, I’m calling that the Disney article(s) may turn out to be ranked up there in people’s all-time favorites.
Regarding the people who say "Aloha" and totally mean it, I’ve been wanting to incorporate "Cheers!" into my conversations with customers (like when we’ve both thanked each other already but I still gotta say something) but everytime I’m about to say it I totally wimp out because I imagine how unnatural it’s going to sound. I envy those Aloha people.

Ghosted by squee4242 @ 06/03/2006 5:14 PM EDT


"Slim Jeans…You’ve got nothing to lose but pounds and inches…and your dignity! Order now!"

By the way, I think if anyone hasn’t seen X3 yet but claims to not want to hear spoilers ought to just see the damn movie already. How big of a fan can you be if you don’t see it on opening weekend? There should only be a 2 day spoiler alert time period so that true fans can see the movie. Of course, I haven’t seen any of the X-Men movies, just never got into them. Superman Returns will be a different story however.

Ghosted by TheCoz @ 06/03/2006 7:18 PM EDT


TheCoz:

I am the kind of fan that can’t see it opening weekend because he’s working all weekend serving the people who are seeing it opening weekend. Unfortunately movie theater employees have to work when normal people see movies :-P

P.S. My X3-lessness will be remedied in three days. Woo hoo!

Ghosted by Spoodles @ 06/03/2006 7:24 PM EDT


what’s the best comic-book film that’s been made? including sequels. come one people, i need a top five here!!!

Ghosted by Pete @ 06/03/2006 7:53 PM EDT


Hey Spoodles,

My bad. Kinda forget that weekend jobs exist. But I still think there should be some sort of spoiler alert time frame.

Ghosted by TheCoz @ 06/03/2006 8:10 PM EDT


I’ll play, Pete.

In order from best to worst:

1) Batman (1989): This movie still amazes me. Nicholson was the best Joker, and Keaton was unexpected and inspired casting. Danny Elfman’s score gives me shivers.

2) Batman Begins: This movie amazes me too. I have no particular prediliction for Batman over other comic characters, but he seems to have gone to the big screen better than any other comic hero. Maybe it’s because he’s more based in realism than the "super power" heroes.

3) Spider-man: Maybe it was the time in my life when I first saw it, but the Peter/MJ story brings tears to my eyes. Spidey 2 was okay, but I love the first.

4) V For Vendetta: Not one of the comic book "standards," but I loved this movie. I just read George Orwell’s 1984, and (while it was an enjoyable book in and of itself), my enjoyment doubled because V For Vendetta mirrored it so frequently.

5) X2: While the first X-Men was kind of underwhelming, this movie took my breath away.

A close sixth is Superman: The Movie, but there are some pacing problems that can’t even be saved by John Williams’ amazing score.

Ghosted by Spoodles @ 06/03/2006 8:11 PM EDT


Guess I’ll play too since I need to kill some time.
5. Sin City – Amazing cinematography and a faithful take on Frank Miller’s graphic novels.

4. Spider-Man – Probably the most fun I’ve had at a movie theater in years. Great story, great casting.

3. Superman – Christopher Reeves truly encapsolated the man of steel.

2. Batman – Jack Nicholson as the Joker and the dark feel of this movie makes it a fav. of mine.

1. The Hulk – Allowed me to catch up on 2 hours of sleep. For that I will be eternally grateful. :-)

By the way, where is the movie love for Flash and Aquaman? Guess because their powers are lame.

Ghosted by TheCoz @ 06/03/2006 8:36 PM EDT


I thought there was a movie with the Flash? A quick IMDB search yeilded a TV series (that I vaguely remmber, actually) and a TV movie, and moive in production: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0439572/

I have to say that V for Vendetta is one of my favorite comic book movies, with a relatively faithful translation, too. like Superman I,II, and III, also..

Ghosted by Cameron T. @ 06/03/2006 9:21 PM EDT


I have nothing but a giant assload of hate for Burton’s Batman movies.
Really all Batman movies but Batman Begins, but especially Burton’s.

Ghosted by Somethin' Funny @ 06/03/2006 10:00 PM EDT


1.)Batman Begins – Exactly like I would’ve done it.
2.)Batman 1966 – People who don’t get the Adam West Batman piss me off so much.
3.)X-men 2 – The first one was great, this one is better.
4.)Spider-man – 2 was alright but this one was more solid.
5.)X-men – Great

When I think comic book movies I’m really thinking super-hero movies. Other movies that are also comics just don’t stand out like that, except something like sin city where the book was pratically story boards.

Ghosted by dohopoki @ 06/04/2006 7:23 AM EDT


Ive got to buy one of those watches- any comercial that uses music from TRON has to be top of the line and state of the art! seriously, I grew up in Poughkeepsie NY and I remember watching this comercial and thinking if I got one I would be the coolest geek around!

Ghosted by Raygunn @ 06/04/2006 7:07 PM EDT


Good call about the TRON music Raygunn – I couldn’t help but notice that myself too. I think it uses the Wendy Carlos track "Tower Music – Let Us Pray." Which, might I add, they also used in the TRON trailer.

God, I’m such a nerd.

Ghosted by Zach @ 06/07/2006 7:26 AM EDT


i see some of this ads on http://www.sportec.com its funny but older

Ghosted by Rasputin @ 06/07/2006 7:41 AM EDT


Anyone noticed what size the Slim Jeans come in? Small, medium and large…

Why would someone wearing small bother with them (unless they have a thing for public humiliation I guess), and would the person who "actually needs" the jeans fit in a large?

$9.95 is a real bargain, though! :D

Ghosted by Flower @ 06/08/2006 10:31 PM EDT


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