As mentioned in the last thread, I spent the past week in Disney World, and we had an excellent time. Sentimentality surely a power to be reckoned with, I’d probably give the Magic Kingdom the nod for bestest out of the four Disney parks. Gets trickier from there. As Disney at large is mostly dry, Epcot might have to nab the #2 slot if only because it’s an absolute blast-to-get-blasted in the World Showcase and roam from Japan to Mexico and need to piss at both countries. Going to give MGM the #3 spot, because it’s small but with a high concentration of great rides and attractions, and probably the best overall vibe at nighttime. Very surprisingly, Animal Kingdom ranks last. Doesn’t mean I didn’t like it, just that it ranks last. It’s a lot of work to have fun in Disney, but it seemed to take the most work at Animal Kingdom.

Also, I mentioned that we were going to stay at two hotels. We started at the Polynesian, which immediately became one of my favorite hotels ever. Wonderfully dated but meticulously cared for, the hotel is practically a relic and its bars sold “Wasabi Mary” cocktails that made me giddy. We ended at the Grand Floridian, which is ridiculously expensive and in retrospect a waste of money, as I hated the hotel and kept thinking I was going to spot two little twin girls chopped up as I grudgingly traded in my Polynesian paradise for strolls down mock Victorian halls that made me feel all embarrassed to think it was up my alley. I mean, I’d just left a group of folks who managed to start every conversation with “ALOHA!” without ever once seeming not into it, and then here was the big fancy place, filled with snotnose goaty people. But that’s an overall minor gripe: Disney f’n rocked.

I took a zillion pictures. I mean it, a zillion. And I’ve spent some of today looking them over, trying to figure how to assemble the best moments into an article. Think it’s going to have to be some kind of “Top Things” list, because if I try to go from Minute One To Minute Infinity, you won’t be reading about it until the park closes in 2078.

While I figure that out, here’s a shorter article that I started before the trip. Another batch of commercials, but really special ones that advertised specific products, with either the products featured or the way the products were featured being too absurd and fascinating to keep to myself. Read about it here, and download the commercials while you’re there.

I’m cracking my knuckles like a real man. I think I need another week off, this time just to atrophy.

Posted by Matt. E-mail me!