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03/19/2006: New Article: More ’80s Commercials!

With just minutes to spare to ensure that I don’t miss tonight’s new Sopranos and thus rob myself of the opportunity to bicker about what a letdown it was around the water cooler tomorrow morning, I finish this weekend’s new article: More `80s Commercials! Pretty awesome batch, I must say. See reggae fruit dance with Snap and Crackle as they usher in Fruity Marshmallow Krispies! See kids turn into Optimus Prime by way of underwear! See the McD.L.T.’s cool side stay cool! Win a Sony Watchman! All this and more! More! A dozen total, each reviewed, with video downloads.

Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

Discussion Thread: 150 comments

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Those Super Naturals look really sweet! More toys/cartoons need to use holograms. Remember how cool the Visionaries toys were?

Ghosted by Eddie Lightning Frog @ 03/19/2006 8:15 PM EST

Dear lord.

::puts her hand up to Matt’s forehead::

You’re updating regularly. Are you feeling quite alright?

Ghosted by Mystie @ 03/19/2006 8:29 PM EST

Unfortunantly, I don’t remember the SuperNaturals. Sure wish I did, because they do look pretty darn sweet. Most of the other ads at least ring bells. We also frequently rented "The Secret of the Sword," as my sisters and I were HUGE She-Ra fans; it was one of our favorites from the (long defunct) Harber View Video in Cape May.

I don’t remember the ad for the Fruity Rice Krispies cereal, but I do remember the cereal. I hate marshmallows in cereal and I hate Rice Krispies, so I wouldn’t touch this one with a 100 foot pole…but at least the ad is way too cute for words.

I think I vaguely remember that Reeces ad, too. I don’t remember if we ever had Underoos; that vogue may have passed by the time we were old enough for them, or maybe we couldn’t afford them.

Ghosted by starwenn @ 03/19/2006 8:36 PM EST

If I was that dude trying to eat a McDLT and my assjerk friends started clapping instead of helping me create a single unit of dining pleasure I would probably break their arms too. Cocky little fully functioning human being jerk faces. Also I wish they made underoos that fit me.

Ghosted by Mike @ 03/19/2006 8:41 PM EST

I have beed hoping ever since I found this site that you might review the Fruity Marshmellow Crispy commercial. Not that it’s good, but whatever reason, it’s one that me and several of my friends seem to remember the song and motions to-20 years later.

Ghosted by kb @ 03/19/2006 8:47 PM EST

Ahh…
I remember those underoo’s, I’m a child of the early 90’s, and I had a pair of Superman ones. I even think there might have been a cape thrown in there too…I used to run from my bed to my parents bed to my brothers crib and then back.

I don’t think I’ve seen them more recently, though they probably have Hulk and Wolverine ones =\

Ghosted by TPStag @ 03/19/2006 8:48 PM EST

Now if we just had a commercial for TMNT Underoos.

Ghosted by Ragnarok @ 03/19/2006 8:50 PM EST

Holy shit! Super Naturals! Nice, Matt. Once again,you make me long for high speed internet…damn this awful dial-up.

In high school I used to buy the Underoos for the t-shirts that used to come with them. It was the only way I could get t-shirts of Superman, Batman, etc. NOW they make awesome t-shirts everywhere. But back then, cool t-shirts were scarce.

Ghosted by Muppet Baby @ 03/19/2006 9:03 PM EST

Just tell me one thing… what were you thinking with that background? x_x

Ghosted by JDavis @ 03/19/2006 9:23 PM EST

I vaguely remember Super Naturals. They look just as awesome as I remember them.
Not to sound homophobic or anything, but I found it slightly amusing in the Fruity Marshmallow Crispies commercial when the girl exclaims "how fruity" and then shows that kid in the yellow sweater looking rather, well, fruity.

Ghosted by Gozer @ 03/19/2006 9:23 PM EST

I am pretty sure they still make underroos. I swear I’ve seen them at TRU, in the apparel section, of course.

I used to have Wonder Woman underroos. God I loved those things. I wanted to be her – and I even made wrist cuff thingies like hers out of wrapping paper tubes.

Ghosted by Ryane @ 03/19/2006 9:24 PM EST

Seems like it was 1980 something the last time you did one of these articles.

Ghosted by dohopoki @ 03/19/2006 9:26 PM EST

Oh, and I’m a chick by the way (for any new people who didn’t know that) so I was able to fit into the t-shirts!

In fact, here’s ME- I am sorry that I don’t have any computer skills and don’t know how to post a link for real. I just took a sudden notion to show my fellow XE-ers a little bit more me. I get to see Mystie, and Matt, and the Manimal, and Erik’s entire team in Germany, etc. etc. So, here’s a bit more me:

http://www.okcupid.com/profile?tuid=1477114862940448563

I guess you’ll have to copy and paste it to see my little spot of the web.

Ghosted by Muppet Baby @ 03/19/2006 9:28 PM EST

Hey! The link worked! Cool. I should take a computer course so that I can express myself on a website. Matt- you have inspired me to try my hand at this computer stuff. It seems like it would be a hell of a good time, despite all the work.

Ghosted by Muppet Baby @ 03/19/2006 9:30 PM EST

Glad I stopped by. Didn’t expect to see X-E greatness. I don’t say this too often on here but I HAD TOTALLY FORGOTTEN ABOUT THAT ONE. In this case, the Super-Naturals. Wow!! I never had them but I do remember wanting them really bad.

I think that the Fruity Rice Krispies ad can be appreciated a bit more by those who lived through the age. For those who are too young, there was a huge "Island lifestyle" fad in the 80’s. Everything from Billy Ocean to COCKTAIL to FRUIT ISLANDS CEREAL. This commercial is a good example of this mania.

Finally, yes, I saw SECRET OF THE SWORD in the theater but, for whatever reason, I cannot remember anything about it. I remember more about the CARE BEARS MOVIE and the HEATHCLIFF MOVIE (??) which is both shocking and sad.
Nice GREMLINS reference on THE SIMPSONS tonight.
P.S. showing the kid pull up the TRANSFORMER drawers was never a good idea…

Ghosted by The Manimal @ 03/19/2006 9:39 PM EST

Matt- regarding the way He-man acted all into She-ra making you think they’d been originally written to be lovers… you’re actually half right. The writers and designers behind the She-ra Toyline had her originally positioned to be He-man’s LOVE INTEREST. The animation studio had to call a time out on that and inform the toymakers that they’d been working on a romantic sub-plot between He-man and Teela that they didn’t want fucked with. So rather than go for a love triangle, She-ra was changed to be He-man’s sister.

Ghosted by Brian @ 03/19/2006 9:52 PM EST

Matt-

Holy dear lord. Thank you for yet again pulling some long-lost childhood memory from the netherregions of my mind and back into the front of my cerebellum. The DJ KAT Show. You are a god (not THE God mind you, but definitely a god) among men.

I also love in the Underoos Commercial how Optimus Kid comes lumbering out of the bathroom like Frankenstein.

Ghosted by Dane @ 03/19/2006 9:58 PM EST

I still say you need to specifically review the Whatchamacallit "Sounds good… smells peanutty!!" commerical.

Ghosted by Piscez @ 03/19/2006 10:03 PM EST

ha! awesome commercials.. i totally missed the deeper complexity of the transformers commercial until watching it again after reading your write up

Ghosted by doc bong @ 03/19/2006 10:12 PM EST

The McDLT…of course. And McDonald’s still suffers from this freshness problem. Burger King too to a lesser extent. Y’know, they could just be like Wendy’s and make things fresh. Makes a heckuva difference. Instead of bizarre clunky packaging. I like the 80s, but ideas like that just make it look like it was the stone age for crying out loud.

Ghosted by Frostor @ 03/19/2006 10:26 PM EST

Rockin’ Sopranos ep tonight.

Ghosted by Matt @ 03/19/2006 10:48 PM EST

Never saw Sopranos. Imagine I should someday. Instead I was watching VH1. Yay naked Maven getting chased by a trannie.

Ghosted by Mystie @ 03/19/2006 10:59 PM EST

Yeah, I never got into the Sopranos either. Which is weird, since I like almost all the other HBO dramas. But Edie Falco was better on Oz…

Ghosted by Welsh Rabbit @ 03/19/2006 11:56 PM EST

So amazing (Sopranos). The consensus seems to be that it was boring but that’s total crap. Big Love, now that was a snooze fest. I really want to like it, too :/
The week will not pass fast enough…Is it Sunday again yet? Yay for new article to cushion the wait at least

Ghosted by squee4242 @ 03/19/2006 11:57 PM EST

Hey Matt…if you ever get a chance to come to the southeastern PA area, you definitely have to check out a place called Zern’s Farmers Market in Boyertown, PA (Berks Co.).

http://www.zerns.com

I was there recently and found, among other items…

–Diet pepsi "Uh huh!" cups
–California raisin figurines
–Tiny Toons figurines
–Dick Tracy action figures
–TMNT action figures of, among others, the Rat King, Usagi Yojimbo, Bebop, Rocksteady
–"Dinosaurs!" action figures
–TWO stores selling HORDES of old 8-bit NES games…old 8-bit NES systems…and Atari!!!

Definitely column-worthy

Ghosted by Mike @ 03/20/2006 1:02 AM EST

What a fun article. Don’t come out of the closet much to post here (though I’m here all the time, go fig), but keep ‘em coming.

Ghosted by Jim @ 03/20/2006 1:03 AM EST

Mike: Mystie beat you to it. Click her name for a Zern’s article. That NES wall is really something to drool over–I hope you didn’t buy the whole thing.

Matt: I hope you answer this….can you please tell me what compression program you used for these ads? They look very clean and yet they loaded very fast (except for the Secret of the Sword trailer). What did you use this time?

Ghosted by Mars @ 03/20/2006 2:02 AM EST

I don’t remember the DJ-Kat show, but I remember a million shows like it.

I wonder if he was local to your area. Fox always has a "local Kids Show host" for every area. I know that because my cable company had both my areas version of Fox (where a clown named Pete McTee hosted the cartoons) and the Baltimore MD version of Fox (where a 20-something guy in a clubhouse full of puppets hosted the cartoons).

Anyway, is there any chance that we’ll see Mac Tonight in a download for this site? I miss Mac Tonight.

Also, if you’re ever in central PA you must check out "The Old Sled Works", it’s an antique/junk store just a couple houses down from my house. I just bought a tape of the Transformers movie a couple days ago, and the weird stuff there includes…
-A Charlie’s Angels board game
-A Welcome Back Kotter puzzle
-A Farmer Donatello TMNT figure (with tractor)
-An Earl Sinclair action figure

That’s all I can think of off-hand.

Ghosted by Tetsu Deinonychus @ 03/20/2006 2:50 AM EST

Zern’s is like the motherfucking holy lands. I’m usually there every other weekend which works out perfectly as I have off every other Saturday. Unfortunately I agreed to swap days with a girl at work so she can go to her friend’s birthday party so I won’t get to hit the place up til April 8. But at least it’ll give Larry’s Hardware time to get some new stuff in for me. They don’t know me by name but I’m sure if you mention "The weird X-Entertainment girl," they’ll know who you’re referring to.

But yeah, maybe by the time it gets warmer out it’ll bring in some new vendors. Did you get to hit up the action figure stand run by the deaf lady? They have a ton of cool dinos and Ghostbusters.

If anyone ever wants to hang out and look for expired cereal with me at Zern’s, don’t be a stranger.

Ghosted by Mystie @ 03/20/2006 7:37 AM EST

Hate to be so insanely off topic. But, yesterday I saw Tab energy drink at my local convenience store. And yes, it was that Tab, and it was 1 calorie. Has anyone else seen this, and have you tried it? i think I must get two cans, one to drink and one to keep on my desk.

Ghosted by kb @ 03/20/2006 10:13 AM EST

Anyone else havin problems downloading or even viewing the new 80’s article? Crap… So close, yet so far away….

Ghosted by Double G @ 03/20/2006 10:17 AM EST

Did anybody else feel really sorry for the McDLT kid? I mean, he’s hanging out with these complete assholes who use every spare breath to mock and verbally abuse him, and he just grins and buries his seething anger deep inside. Why? What unfortunate series of life choices has led him to be the bitch of a group which obviously keeps him around for their own vicious entertainment? And it’s obvious that somebody busted that arm for him. He can’t even get his story straight. "I…I fell down some stairs." In fact, based on repeated viewings, I can only conclude that one or all of his "friends" inflicted the injury, either by daring him to do something willfully dangerous or just throwing an old-fashioned blanket party, and they’re gloating over the fact that he’ll never reveal the dark truth. The most likely outcome of all this is a rage-fueled schoolyard massacre. "All I wanted was to eat my trendy damn sandwich, you twats! Now you can just eat lead!"

Here’s to you, flannel-wearing tormented 80s teen. Hope your meds are working okay.

Ghosted by Jedoc @ 03/20/2006 10:21 AM EST

The Sopranos – Last night’s episode I’m sure could be viewed as almost jumping the shark. I don’t want to give anything away here, but we’ve seen the same kind of storyline in other (lesser) tv series. I guess it should be no surprise that it was directed by a former X-Files director.

That said, great episode. I think they crammed a full seasons worth of character development into on 53 minute episode. They’ve just set up the rest of the series. Good stuff.

Anybody else hoping that Meadow takes over the family business? That would just be so kick ass.

Ghosted by Chris Martin @ 03/20/2006 11:26 AM EST

I had Spider Woman underoos with matching spidie-eye-shaped sunglasses. Totally bitchin’ I had Wonder Woman ‘roos too but they weren’t quite as cool.

Ghosted by Carri @ 03/20/2006 11:51 AM EST

The McDLT commercial with the West Side Story-type dancing people beats this one by far. And the HOT (beat beat) stays HOT! The hot stays hot, the cool stays cool.

It’s a good time for the great taste of McDonalds. I watched Supersize me for the first time, now all I want is some fries and a cheeseburger.

Ghosted by Jessica Marie @ 03/20/2006 12:53 PM EST

Was that Joey Cramer in the Jedi ad?

Ghosted by H Double @ 03/20/2006 12:54 PM EST

Finally. Man what memories… and yea, the Jason Alexander McDLT commerical is tops. (Matt has it somewhere), I like the underoos commercial… I used to transform into He-Man all the time.

Ghosted by Double G @ 03/20/2006 1:33 PM EST

DJ KAT, Oh my. For years I thought that show was but a dream. I used to love that show. I still remember the DJ Kat theme.

This is the DJ Kat show,
and I am DJ Kat.
With a D and a J and a Kat with a K,
You better stick around Ohh kaaaayyyyyy!

Right after it, I remember watching Dr. Science. (I know more than you do, call me Dr. Science).

I cannot tell you WTF either show was about, but still remember the day I tuned in and the show was no more.

Ghosted by Pedro @ 03/20/2006 1:55 PM EST

"…I’ll have successfully killed 20 minutes of your day."

Obviously you over estimate my reading, and internet connection, speed.

Ghosted by Mad Cow @ 03/20/2006 2:04 PM EST

Chris, it’s a cool idea but it would be just a touch too Godfather III for my liking. I want to see what AJ is going to get into…
I am hearing a lot of Worst. Sopranos. Ever. which I think is nuts. I thought it was haunting. I can’t stop picturing it.

Ghosted by squee4242 @ 03/20/2006 2:17 PM EST

Where to begin? First of all, God bless you, Matt, for the Fruity Marshmallow Krispies. That jingle has been running through my head for 20 years with big holes in it that I thought I never had hopes of filling. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Your comments about the McDLT made me laugh because I remember a very specific incident from my childhood. We didn’t live near a McDonald’s (hard to believe, I know) and one night, on the way to Grandma’s, we stopped at a McDonald’s to get some food since we were going to get there way after dinner time. Mom and Dad both got McDLTs and I BEGGED for one. In my little five-year-old mind, this was more than a burger, it was an experience. I needed it. Alas, because of my youth my requests were denied and I was heartbroken. Apparently I was REALLY heartbroken since I’m going on 27 and I can still remember the night like it was last week. I remember a similar incident with the Wendy’s Big Classic that came in a styrofoam dome that I had to get my hands on. No dice.

As for Underoos, I had Barbie and, most disturbingly, Daisy Duke. The panties were made to look like little jean shorts. I may have had others, but those are the only ones I remember. Incidentally, I found my Barbie Underoos at the bottom of a box the other day. On one hand, the sentimentality is huge, on the other, ewww….old underwear…

Ghosted by Lori @ 03/20/2006 2:35 PM EST

Lori:I hope they were laundered! blech.

Ghosted by Double G @ 03/20/2006 2:51 PM EST

I remember SuperNaturals, but I liked Visionaries more. I still have Arzon and Cravex.

Ghosted by kingklash, knight of the wild frontier @ 03/20/2006 4:04 PM EST

Here’s a bigger question about the McDLT ad. The guy with the broken arm is obviously a jock and is older. So why is hanging out with younger nerds?

My grandparents had the lion Supernatural figure at their house so that’s how I one of the few to actually remember them.

We had the FOX Kids Club in our area hosted by a magician and later a pretty girl. They had the a regular thing called "Word of the Day" where if you submitted a word, you got a toy. I submitted "stethoscope" (I was in second grade I think) and was picked, but don’t remember what I won. I just found it exciting that my name was said on tv.

Also never got into Sopranos. HBO is hit/miss with me. Loved OZ, Six Feet Under, Sex and the City, Tracy Takes On, Larry Sanders, Dennis Miller, Tales From the Crypt, and Deadwood. Pretty much didn’t give a hoot about anything not listed.

Ghosted by JLAJRC @ 03/20/2006 4:06 PM EST

Lori- I too, have a McDonald’s memory that is still with me- I STILL remember the ONE time I had McDonald’s using their chopsticks…and I guess I would have only been about 4 years old, too! I am not so sure I like the fact that a fast food restaurant can have such impacting, haunting memories…

Ghosted by Muppet Baby @ 03/20/2006 4:13 PM EST

McDonald’s memory… Forest and Broadway…. my friend and i had just started eating our big macs when a horrid smell hit our noses… "did you fart!?" we each exclaimed simultaneously to each other. "no, wasn’t me" we both replied… yet the scent lingered and actually got stronger… what the hell was the smell?! we look around and behind us and there on the floor is a trail of shit smelling foulness some old lady leaked out of her pants on her run to the bathroom…. needless to say, we didn’t finish our meal, and I don’t think I ate fast food again for a year. blech.

Ghosted by Double G @ 03/20/2006 4:22 PM EST

I had that same He-man shirt the kid in the under roos commercial had on. And I had Super Natural figures, they sucked if the hologram sticker got sun damaged. But if they didn’t they rocked, because when I was a kid holograms blew my mind.

Wait, holograms still blow my mind. Is it 3D, is it just a sticker? Can I touch it? I’m so confused!

Ghosted by Fox @ 03/20/2006 4:37 PM EST

Sorry for being so late in commenting on this, but the Manimal mentioned Fruit Islands cereal. FINALLY, someone else remembers it! I was almost starting to believe it was a hallucination brought on by some other fruity goodness out there, but now I know this is not true. Thank you for saving my sanity Manimal. Also, if I remember correctly, there was a commercial for the cereal in which the king (I don’t remember his name) was lost out in the ocean in a boat. There was a contest running to help him find his way home. I believe that the cereal was yanked out of production before the contest ended; therefore, I am forced to assume that the good king suffered a horrible, scurvy-filled death on the open seas. Can anyone confirm if this contest did indeed happen and that the cereal ended its run before the conclusion of the contest? I need your help!

Ghosted by Bludge @ 03/20/2006 4:39 PM EST

Sadly I have zero recollection of the cereal/contest of which you speak. However, if it were a King lost at sea, I would strongly suspect that his ultimate fate involved pirates. Especially if he’s on TV telling everybody about his situation. Maybe the cereal was pulled because they had to pay a ransom and just couldn’t afford to produce it anymore. Tragic. Oh well. Maybe after that the Fruity Islands themselves held free elections and became democratic republics.

But I ramble. Yeah, but definitely pirates.

Silly fruit boat king…

Ghosted by Rhino @ 03/20/2006 4:51 PM EST

I could be wrong, but the kid in the tux announcing the star wars action figures looks and sounds a lot like the kid from the movie ‘Flight of the Navigator’ of the the greater live action Disney movies of the 80’s. The kid from the movie is named Joey Kramer. Anyone have an idea?

Ghosted by Garrett @ 03/20/2006 4:51 PM EST

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