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02/12/2006: TMNT: Snacks From The Sewer! (And snow.)

New Article Alert! I’ve been on a Ninja Turtles kick ever since finding that weird “Movie Action” figure/DVD set as seen in a previous entry, so it was time to go find my empty bag of TMNT Crunchabungas and a big pile of other junk for a huge tribute to Ninja Turtles food products, covering everything from gum-eyed popsicles to Royal Ooze gelatin. The incredible thing is that I still have enough stuff leftover to do a Part 2, but in the interest of variety, that won’t happen until 2015. And I just might be dead by then. Article includes a short recipe section detailing how you can make and drink your own retromutagen. It’s what you’ve all been waiting for.

We had one hell of a snowstorm last night, and it looks like it’s still coming down a bit. Over a foot here and closer to sixteen inches in many places nearby. Gonna be fun commuting in tomorrow. On the upside, two kids knocked on the door offering to dig my car out for 20 bucks, and though that’s on the high side of snow shoveling rates, I just couldn’t stomach the idea that Sunday night would be spent cursing God for giving clouds a mean streak. Paid ‘em, and though they of course left just enough to make me still have to go out there and finish up at some point today, at least I won’t feel like the Chinese inmate those filthy Klingons made an example of in Star Trek VI.


Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

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Discussion Thread: 128 comments

Ninja Turtles stuff is always a sure-fire winner, Matt.

First!

Ghosted by hiyo @ 02/12/2006 5:04 PM EST

Damn I loved those pies. Wasn’t there a chocolate?

Ghosted by Kidd Video @ 02/12/2006 5:12 PM EST

I’m playing with my Foot Soldiers right now. Yay Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!

Ghosted by Darth Poop @ 02/12/2006 5:18 PM EST

Some extreme weather there Matt. Wish we had real snow where I live. All we get is hard thick frost. sniff….

Ghosted by Pete @ 02/12/2006 5:18 PM EST

Here’s a TMNT related question. My friend claims that in the TMNT game, he didn’t specify which one; there was a villain with a shell. I have no idea what the hell he is talking about. Anyone out there know?

Ghosted by Darth Poop @ 02/12/2006 5:34 PM EST

Villains with a shell? Tokka? Slash?

Ghosted by Matt @ 02/12/2006 5:36 PM EST

Snow seems like fun sometimes but I’m grateful for my sunshiney days.
I spent many summer afternoons with the gum eyed turtles…yummy.

Ghosted by squee4242 @ 02/12/2006 5:44 PM EST

Thanks Matt. You guys ever notice the little white dots all over the Movie Star Foot Soldier? I don’t know why but those dots have always bothered me.

Ghosted by Darth Poop @ 02/12/2006 5:51 PM EST

Matt- Both links under the Delicious Ninja Turtles Cookies don’t work.

Ghosted by Darth Poop @ 02/12/2006 6:35 PM EST

I dug out my own car. :(

On the upside, the mall I work in was closed. Work snow day woo!

Ghosted by Denise @ 02/12/2006 6:47 PM EST

Thanks Matt. I didn’t know how badly I needed to see those fruit snack packages again until I scrolled down to them…

Ghosted by Mattman @ 02/12/2006 7:00 PM EST

We didn’t have snow until sometime in the middle of the night here. I live @ the Jersey shore, and we had rain long into the middle of the night–I woke up at six am to check the weather, and lo and behold, SNOW (don’t worry, I went back to bed right away). I’m not a fan of snow. I’d say we had around 6-9 inches–my boyfriend lives in West Jersey, out near Philly, and his dad said this morning that they had 9 inches–and counting.

Needless to say, it was bad, but it cleaned up nicely–my brother, dad, and boyfriend shoveled up today, and my brother did somersaults over the snow covered plants that line out driveway. My boyfriend took pictures. Our driveway is nice and clean, though slightly wet, and my street (a dead-end sideroad) is plowed.

How did you guys do, in terms of snow.

Ghosted by Allison @ 02/12/2006 7:02 PM EST

I am so bummed–no SNL this weekend. I hate the winter Olympics! Sure, its ok during the summer, but no SNL makes me extremely depressed. Oh well. Seeing my boyfriend and SNL are the highlights of my week.

I was forced to watch CBS-3 Eyewitness News in lieu of SNL (the news was on later b/c of a movie). Nothing beats Weekend Update.

Ghosted by Allison @ 02/12/2006 7:08 PM EST

Stellar article as always! I was never too found of the the Farley fruit snacks, no matter what shape they took. Since you mentioned the possibility of a second article, I can’t help but wonder if you had a hand in the sudden disappearance of a good 20 food products that I know were listed on a certain TMNT Store no 24 hours ago. ;)

Ghosted by Mystie @ 02/12/2006 7:08 PM EST

Darth Poop: In Turtles in Time, you had to fight Tokka and Metalhead, both of whom have shells. That’s about all I can recall.

I wonder if I still have my Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles album laying around. I have a MIGHTY NEED to listen to "Pizza Power." And "No Treaty After the War," which always choked me up for reasons I could not quite define, so I couldn’t listen to it when my friends were around. That was the first album I ever purchased.

Ghosted by Jedoc @ 02/12/2006 7:17 PM EST

I just was looking at the article again, and I saw the pic of those little cookies. Oh my god, I used to LOVE those cookies!! My mom got them in a large plastic ninja turtle shaped container that doubled as a bank once the cookies were done. My mom just refilled the container every time is was empty. Yeah, now that’s what it is like to be a kid.

Ghosted by Allison @ 02/12/2006 7:19 PM EST

Oh and LOL at the new main site title.

Ghosted by Mystie @ 02/12/2006 7:26 PM EST

I do always enjoy these green-themed walks down memory lane.

Again, Matt, you have succeeded in reminding me of something I didn’t even know I missed–the Crunchabungas, a word which I resolve to use in conversation from now on whenever possible. Like Cheetos Paws, I now have a hopeless desire to taste a cheesy snack food from times past. Unlike Paws, there is no taste equivalent to suffice.

Also, the Turtles macaroni & cheese was a fave, and while I remembered that, I forgot about the letter system. I didn’t think about it too much at the time, but you’re right, it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense.

And though I remember your earlier article, I STILL crave Turtles Pies (I actually did like the taste). With my greater capacity for food at this age, I bet I could eat 10 in one day. I’d throw up, but I could still force them down.

Ghosted by Frostor @ 02/12/2006 7:30 PM EST

TMNT Cookies!!! Wow, I forgot those even existed. My best friend and I devored those things back in the day.

Ghosted by Carri @ 02/12/2006 7:33 PM EST

Out of curiosity, about how much is "a bunch" of cornstartch?

Ghosted by JDavis @ 02/12/2006 7:35 PM EST

I think that somebody is planning to make some ooze.

Ghosted by Darth Poop @ 02/12/2006 7:48 PM EST

We got 12 inches here, and for the first time since I moved two weeks ago, I was actually happy the Acme’s gotten my transfer so screwed up. I wouldn’t have been able to ride to work today anyway. I don’t think it rained at all. It started flurrying yesterday afternoon around quarter of 2. The flurries stopped…but then, sometime between 2 and 4 (I was in a mall at that point, so I don’t know when), it started snowing big, fat flakes…and sticking to the ground, though not the streets. It didn’t stick to the streets until late last night.

Like Matt, I was kind of old for TMNT by the time they debuted in the late 80s. I loved the cartoons and went to see the first movie three times in the theater (the first movie I ever saw in the theater more than once) but never had any of the toys. Most of the food either never made it to South Jersey or it just wasn’t something my mom would buy. I do remember having the fruit snacks a lot (I saw boxes of the TMNT Farley’s fruit snacks in disreputable dollar stores well into the 90s), and I have vague memories of the cookies and the pies. We may have had the cereal, too, though I don’t remember eating any myself unless I felt like picking out the marshmallows. I HATE cereal with marshmallows.

Ghosted by starwenn @ 02/12/2006 9:14 PM EST

1) Loved the article – I love how your writing can be nostalgic and funny while bringing up some really intersting ideas about why we all get nostalgic about something as silly as TMNT.
2) Wait… Splinter was a human at first and turned into a rat after the ooze hit? I’m so ashamed – maybe I’m getting rusty on my Turtles lore.
3) I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – that TMNT cereal was awesome. You’re right – you wouldn’t think that Chex and marshmellows would go well together, but as a wise philosopher once said, "opposites attract".
D) Anyone listen to this week’s Ricky Gervais podcast yet? Comedy gold.

Ghosted by Gozer @ 02/12/2006 9:44 PM EST

(By the way, now that the pointsettias have been replaced by little crustaceans, maybe you should replace "Chestnuts roasted by" with "[insert name here] was a rock lobster!").

Ghosted by Gozer @ 02/12/2006 10:00 PM EST

I like TMNT excessively. I think that those it was motive force of the present culture which we possess. But as for me you did not understand concept of turtle. I that am between turtle personal, it presumes that that is magnitude

Ghosted by YanChau @ 02/12/2006 10:15 PM EST

I absolutely remember enjoying Crunchabungas, unlike the pies which are completely disgusting.
Gozer: I just used "grippage" in a sentence, LOL. I just got my first iPod and have been listening to The Ricky Gervais Show constantly. Maybe I inquire where you downloaded them from, because I’ve been having trouble finding all the eps? I keep going back and forth between whether Pilkington is just a comedy improv genius or really thinks that way.

Ghosted by squee4242 @ 02/12/2006 10:16 PM EST

Yeah, Splinter was originally human in the cartoon version, but the movie version he was originally a normal rat. IIRC, Yoshi (Splinter) was living in the sewer when he came in contact with the mutagen and it turned him into the last animal he touched, which was a rat.

Ghosted by Mystie @ 02/12/2006 10:18 PM EST

When I was younger (about 12) I worked in a hot dog stand in front of my family’s grocery store. Every year they would have a kid’s festival and bring whatever big attraction there was for the year to greet the kids.

I remember when they brought a Ninja Turtle (I believe Raphael) the line was literally over an hour long. He signed the kid’s whatever and gave em a hug and they went on their way. When he went inside for a break I saw him take of his head, and he was just about my age. I couldn’t believe it. Apparently those costumes don’t really fit taller adults

So, after that, my mom elected me and my sister to wear the costumes so that the cost would be down. It only really worked for promotional caracters. So anyways, I was people like Chester Cheetah and the Honey Nut Bee. Hugging little kids.

Ghosted by kb @ 02/12/2006 10:19 PM EST

I was a five year old girl when TNMT was the big thing,and I was in love (Leonardo was the first of many anthropomorphized animal crushes I had as a preadolescent). I had a turtles birthday, I was a turtle for Halloween, the whole deal. I had Turtle episodes on tape (the ones that Burger King was offering), and all for turtles as action figures, and a Leonardo plushie I slept with every night. Little by little this stuff was given away; I wish I still had it- especially the Ninja Turtles shaped cake pan.

Ghosted by LittleSable @ 02/12/2006 10:24 PM EST

I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again:

I Fucking loved the Turtle Pies. I can still taste them on my tongue, and I believe I climaxed when I came across that point in the article. It was wonderful.

Snow-wise, I got….lots. Well more than 6 inches, I know that. I’d be bummed that my college isn’t closed, but I had a 3 day weekend to begin with :D

Ghosted by Invader Norbert @ 02/12/2006 10:32 PM EST

squee4242: Unfortunately, I’ve only gotten my hands on Episodes 7-11 which are readily available on iTunes. I can’t find any previous episodes anywhere.

Ghosted by Gozer @ 02/12/2006 11:03 PM EST

I remember the cereal and crackers (which I didn’t really like, but ate anyway because it was TMNT-related), but those fruit snacks were the biggest part of my life. I remember how nasty the green ones were.

Ghosted by RewolfJ @ 02/13/2006 12:05 PM EST

Yup same problem here Gozer! It’s all definitely comedy gold. I’m sorry it’s almost over, but it means more Extras to come so that’s cool.

Ghosted by squee4242 @ 02/13/2006 12:13 PM EST

I definately remember the cereal, cookies, pudding pies and fruit snacks. But not the pizza, Ooze, or Crunchabungas.

I loved watching the original cartoon as a kid. I’m also one of the few that didn’t mind the live action Staurday show with Venus, the female turtle.

Action figure-wise though, I think the family collection tended more towards their enemies and friends than the turtles themselves. I even had a transforming Splinter that turned into their van and the pizza shooter.

I liked the second film the best. I barely remember the first one and despised the third.

PLEASE don’t wait until 2015 to do another turtle food article.

Ghosted by JLAJRC @ 02/13/2006 12:44 PM EST

Speakng of the pudding pies, I just reread the pudding pie article. Did Hostess possibly put out two different versions of the same pie? I definately remember there being green vanilla pudding inside one with a possible normal-looking crust. Did they do the inverse to (green crust, regular vanilla pudding also?)

Ghosted by JLAJRC @ 02/13/2006 12:50 PM EST

I remember when the Turtles cereal had the promotion where a box of the cereal came with a free Turtle shaped bowl. I wanted one of those friggin’ bowls so much, but I couldn’t convince my parents to buy the cereal for me. For years, I would get pissed whenever I saw one of those bowls at someone’s house.

Ghosted by Quammy @ 02/13/2006 1:00 AM EST

*We interupt this TMNT Blog with this special Bulletin!*

After years of not being in existence…MAD Balls are returning to the world!

Thanks to those wacky inmates over at Art Asylum, MAD Balls is making a come back. Same great MAD-ness, but now with better sculpting!

Check out some pictures over at Figures.com:

http://photos.figures.com/photo/1/showgallery.php?cat=3528

MAD Balls: Gross! Ghastly! Freaky fun for everyone!

*We now return you to your TMNT Blog, already in progress.*

Ghosted by Boglin @ 02/13/2006 1:20 AM EST

Um, no Tropical Oils? Crazy cereal if you ask me. What kind of sick bastards worked at Ralston?

Semper Fi,
Erik Majorwitz

Ghosted by Erik Majorwitz @ 02/13/2006 1:52 AM EST

I almost got teary eyed when you mentioned spending the weekend eating crunchabungas and watching TGIF. I’ve REALLY been missing early 90s weekends lately.

Anyway, I have to say I enjoyed the taste of crunchabungas and really wish there was something like it out now.

Also, does anyone remember the juice-boxes that had cool box-art based on the archie version?

Ghosted by Tetsu Deinonychus @ 02/13/2006 3:01 AM EST

I wonder why they never made any food items honoring villian character Rat King?

Ghosted by Review the World @ 02/13/2006 3:19 AM EST

Dang. "Ninja Turtle Pizza." There’s your killer license right there. It’s THEIR pizza. What kid of my generation wouldn’t have fallen for that? I wish a major pizza joint would have gotten those rights, though, instead of some cheap microwave sludge no Turtle would go near. "Bogus, dude!"

Here’s a heads-up: if you haven’t been to my site recently, I’m currently running something people have been requesting for a while: the original U.S. Acres comic strip by Jim Davis that led to the segments on Garfield and Friends. Yes, Orson’s farm was a strip first.

Ghosted by Mars @ 02/13/2006 3:34 AM EST

That’s cool for the person that posted on SNT about finding those ‘ooze’ boxes. I’ll have to try to make some with ‘evil laugh’ cornstarch!!! I missed most of the cool TMNT stuff cause I am a girl and my family wasn’t convinced that I needed to play with the figures and be obsessed with it. I had a couple of the figures even though I wanted all four, and I had the mike’s beach jeep that had a surfboard on the back and a soda sixpack gun and a pizza related weapon of some sort I believe. I wanted to keep it together so bad because the pieces looked so looseable. I am kund of curious about the chex, marshmellow combo, if the chex pieces were frosted it would be a winner garunteed. I was just (and still am but not as much) obsessed with simpsons merchandise. Whenever I saw an action figure, or a comic, or a candy with the simpsons on it I threw a tantrum until I got it. It was awesome indeed.

Ghosted by Goob @ 02/13/2006 3:38 AM EST

Id kill to get my hands on some TMNT juicebox again.. that stuff was my reason for existance

Ghosted by AJ @ 02/13/2006 4:07 AM EST

Quammy: I had one of those bowls. Now, I’m not trying to say that makes me a better person that you. But I think we all know it goes without saying, am I right?

Ghosted by Jedoc @ 02/13/2006 8:04 AM EST

We used to get Turtles Mutagen bars up here in Canada. They were basically shaped like a ruler, but made out of delicious green taffy. Man, I could go for one of those right now.

Ghosted by Matt St. Cool @ 02/13/2006 8:49 AM EST

JLAJRC:

Yes! I’m so glad somebody else remembers that! I was slightly confused by the Pudding Pie article the first time I saw it, because my mind-brain clearly remembered green pudding in a white crust. You are not alone.

I loved those little buggers, and as Invader Norbert says, something makes me able to taste that bad boy as I speak. Which is weird, because I mustn’t have had a pudding pie since I was eight. Somehow, though, I’m able to retain that sensation (along with Kind Cuisine brownies hot out of the microwave).

I didn’t do Crunchabungas when I watched TGIF–I remember Pop Qwiz corn and mini-pizzas made on English muffins…oh the joy.

Anyway, thanks for the article, Matt. This is already definitely one of my favorites on the site, because I remember eating each and every one of these things (and your insight into WHY we’re nostalgic is great).

Ghosted by mtrox @ 02/13/2006 9:01 AM EST

Heh, I’ve sometimes thought that if I could time-travel to, say, 1990, I would definitely go to a supermarket first, just to check out all the old junk food I remember and that my parents would never dream of buying. That way you could actually eat those Ninja Turtle Pudding Pies and not get sick.

Ghosted by Andrew @ 02/13/2006 9:12 AM EST

Awesome article, Matt! Really haven’t much else to say at the moment… it’s Monday morning and I kept myself up too late reading the new Stephen King novel last night.

Ghosted by ZiZak @ 02/13/2006 9:17 AM EST

I’m 10 mins outside of philly, we got about 12-16 inches of snow. And I dug my car out with nothing but 6 hands, me, my girlfriend, and my brother. I didn’t have a shovel. Just got here to work at 9ish we had a 2 hour delay. I’m pissed that we had to come in at all because the roads are still somewhat crappy and our parking lot is like a sheet of ice.

TURTLE POWER!

Ghosted by Geoffinsanity @ 02/13/2006 10:02 AM EST

We got 16 inches or so of snow and no one plowed my parking lot til 3pm so I couldnt even come home. Ugh.

Ninja turtles cereal was teh awesome. I remember eating it when I wouldnt touch a million other kid like cereals. I probably ate ten boxes or more of the stuff. It was sooo good. I also remember the vehicle that shot the plastic pizzas. That was soooo cool at the time. I had so many turtle toys it wasnt even funny. I kept all the figures in this giant cardboard box that was decorated like the Turtle van (which I got for a BDay one year). One of my fav figures was the triceratops guy, I dont remember his name, but I do remember he was blue and yellow I think. I loved him to death. Oh well. Turtlemania swept the grade schools like a fever… what can I say?

Ghosted by Kittycatgirl @ 02/13/2006 10:25 AM EST

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This entry was posted on Sunday, February 12th, 2006 at 4:59 pm and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.