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02/12/2006: TMNT: Snacks From The Sewer! (And snow.)

New Article Alert! I’ve been on a Ninja Turtles kick ever since finding that weird “Movie Action” figure/DVD set as seen in a previous entry, so it was time to go find my empty bag of TMNT Crunchabungas and a big pile of other junk for a huge tribute to Ninja Turtles food products, covering everything from gum-eyed popsicles to Royal Ooze gelatin. The incredible thing is that I still have enough stuff leftover to do a Part 2, but in the interest of variety, that won’t happen until 2015. And I just might be dead by then. Article includes a short recipe section detailing how you can make and drink your own retromutagen. It’s what you’ve all been waiting for.

We had one hell of a snowstorm last night, and it looks like it’s still coming down a bit. Over a foot here and closer to sixteen inches in many places nearby. Gonna be fun commuting in tomorrow. On the upside, two kids knocked on the door offering to dig my car out for 20 bucks, and though that’s on the high side of snow shoveling rates, I just couldn’t stomach the idea that Sunday night would be spent cursing God for giving clouds a mean streak. Paid ‘em, and though they of course left just enough to make me still have to go out there and finish up at some point today, at least I won’t feel like the Chinese inmate those filthy Klingons made an example of in Star Trek VI.


Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

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Discussion Thread: 128 comments

Mentioned them, but they were left out intentionally for a future article.

Ghosted by Matt @ 02/15/2006 10:05 AM EST

Thanks for the memories. They sold the TMNT pies in my high school cafeteria and I used to eat them all the time. I still have my TMNT playing cards…

Ghosted by Sarah @ 02/16/2006 12:31 PM EST

Where the hell are those Turtle Pies on the list? I remember begging Mom for those daily when I was a kid. Probobly the most sugar-filled dessert product in history. Raphael is cool but rude (Gimme a break!)

Ghosted by Adam @ 02/16/2006 2:20 PM EST

Hey Matt,

There is a good chance you’ll never see this, since it is so far down the list. But I had to know–how many entries are there for ietrophysics on Google? Just 1. Yours. Becauses the real spelling is IATROPHYSICS. Whatever that means. But there are over 400 hits for it.

Ghosted by Sean (the awesome fish one) @ 02/16/2006 2:32 PM EST

Yay! A Sean post!

And a mystery solved!

Ghosted by Matt @ 02/16/2006 2:39 PM EST

ive eaten everything thRT YOU SHOWED ON THE TMNT PAGE…THE CRUNCHABUNGAS HMMM I STILL TASTE THEM FROM MY CHILDHOOD OF GETTING SICK AS HELL ON JUNK FOOD AND REAKLY WONDERING WHY I FELT THAT WAY….I LOVE IT THANKS FOR REMINDING ME.

Ghosted by milk @ 02/16/2006 5:11 PM EST

Wow, thoroughly impressed with your dedication to the TMNT brand. Also loved the tribute page to the cookies….I was actually in the commercial for those cookies. My sister was too and is actually in one of your screen shots. I got paid $20 for a 14 hour shoot at a run down old school on the northeast side of Milwaukee. We were told to bring 2 sets of clothes and a bag lunch. They actually ran out of film during the afternoon and had to pay for every kid on set to get McDonalds down the street…great times indeed. Along with the $20 we all got a vhs copy of the commercial, which I still have!! Great site! Thanks for the memories….

Ghosted by kyle @ 02/16/2006 9:29 PM EST

Care to sell this stuff to me?.. I’d like to buy them
IM DAMN SERIOUS

Ghosted by masonx31@bellsouth.net @ 02/16/2006 9:44 PM EST

Glad to bring you a momemt of joy Matt! Like you, I finally have a little time off, actually allowing me to post here. Not actually read all of the posts, mind you…

How are the fish? I just recently got a Rainbow Snakehead from a friend, and it is an awesome fish in terms of colour and personality. But they are probably illegal in NY (and most of the US) just because they are snakeheads–even though these ones are about as aggressive as minnows. And not much bigger.

Ghosted by Sean (the real one) @ 02/16/2006 11:04 PM EST

Yo Matt do you recall another commercial for the cereal where bebop and rocksteady steal the marshmallows and the turtles beat their asses and make them put them all back? Its funny to see the turtles glowering down at the two as they count the marshmallows they put in with bad counting (fifty eleven….fifty twelve.) Anyone?

Ghosted by Cap'n Spacklepants @ 02/17/2006 2:34 PM EST

Oh man, it’s been a while since I’ve commented on X-E… but I never realized you did the article on the TMNT cookies. My daughter is now the proud owner of my Raphael coin bank cookie box, and that guy in the really band Michaelangelo costume, I have my picture with him somewhere. If I ever find it I’ll be sure to find a scanner and send it in!

Ghosted by SKiTZo from stupid5pin.com @ 02/18/2006 4:14 AM EST

Yo Matt I totally still have a can of TMNT Chef Boyardee circa mid 90s! My parents tried to throw it away about a decade ago, but I saved it in my toybox…for a special occassion I guess? Like I’d open it on my 25th wedding aniversary or some shit? And so it waits…

Ghosted by PONSONBY BRITT @ 02/18/2006 5:25 PM EST

I still have a well worn and much used Michaelangelo bowl that came on a glorious and blessed box of the cereal some 17 years ago. I loved that bowl. Don’t remember how I felt about the cereal.

Ghosted by Bonzo @ 02/18/2006 11:07 PM EST

Ah yes, that brings back memories, although I think that here in the UK, we take the prize for "most spurious turtle-themed foodstuff"…I remember insisting on eating turtle-brand BREAD. Nothing special about it, just your bog-standard loaf, but with the hero turtles on the packaging. We did have some cheap’n'nasty turtle pizza too…so in the thrall of turtlemania was that I was willing to eat apple pizza for dinner.

Ghosted by casiokid @ 02/20/2006 6:46 PM EST

I remember all of those turtles things, except the microwavable pizzas.

I even remember the commercials for the crunchabungas… actually all I remember from the commercial is the turtles saying

" blah blah blah blah new pizza crunchabungas!"
" SNACK ATTACK! SNACK ATTACK JACK!"
" blah blah blah blah spicy little pizzas!"

Ahh, the joys of my childhood.

Ghosted by Ken @ 02/22/2006 2:47 PM EST

Yo, I’m not about to read all those comments, but I have all four of the Ninja Turtles Cereal Bowls that came with that cereal. I was super into TMNT and I realized at the time that those bowls were hot shit: they came shrink wrapped to the box and I begged my dad to buy all 4 boxes at one time. I think I probably ate all the cereal in like a week. I LOVED that shit. Chex was a favorite cereal of mine, and to add a sort of Lucky Charm element to it was awesome.

Ghosted by Craig @ 02/22/2006 10:38 PM EST

I remember suggesting that you write about Crunchabungas, but you you said you didn’t have the resources to do a commercial. But now you have written about them. And so to that I say: SWEET MOTHER OF FUCKER JESUS HOLY AND SHIT!!!

Anyway, it’s been forever since I’ve visited, but I like the article, even though I haven’t read it. And now I shall read it.

Ghosted by Nate @ 02/24/2006 10:12 PM EST

Matt, your the reason for living.

When I was little I was afraid of marshmellow related cereals therfore was too afraid to exprience the amazment that was "Ninja Turtle Cereal"

-cheese

Ghosted by Louie face @ 02/25/2006 12:06 PM EST

Just finished reading the article. Figured I’d try making the drink. Of course, all I had was Orange Jell-o Light. And then I dropped the package in. And the corn starch didn’t mix!

I tried it. It tastes like a hot drink of orange Jell-o. With clumps of corn starch. Thanks anyways.

Ghosted by Tutsuro @ 02/26/2006 2:30 PM EST

Oh my god! TMNT BUBBLE-GUM-EYED POPSICLES!!! The ice cream trucks in Austin used to carry those and I got one every time. Best snack food I have ever eaten — and I’m speaking of experiences I had when I was only like.. 5 years old! Left that big an impression on me lol.

Ghosted by ReishVedaur @ 02/27/2006 5:48 AM EST

Mmmmm… OOOZE!! I just recently found some of my old TMNT stuff in the attic… it was like a time warp!

Ghosted by Double G @ 02/28/2006 2:28 PM EST

matt: Cereal link to 2003 article no worky.

Ghosted by Ed @ 03/02/2006 4:09 AM EST

I can remember a different kind of Ninja Turtle cookie… it was a chocolate cookie with a green mint frosting… I remember getting in physical fights with my younger brother over these cookies, the worst of which led to the breaking of our garage door…

They were THAT good…

Ghosted by Tony @ 03/05/2006 1:11 AM EST

You forgot to mention TMNT pasta in a can. Spaghettios TMNT style.

Ghosted by Juiceman @ 03/05/2006 7:50 PM EST

My mom used to give me and my brother the fruit snacks. I loved those! Too bad I can’t find them anymore. I also would’ve liked to try the TMNT Pies as well. Good times…

Ghosted by Brian @ 08/28/2006 10:42 PM EDT

hey man, i loved their cereal, but i didn’t know it was just chex mix and marshmallows that’s crazy. anyways where can i get some of their popsicles, they’re good too! great site!

Ghosted by Anonymous @ 03/20/2007 12:44 AM EST

so….i definitely have been trying to figure out what the name of those little pizza corn snacks were that i chowed down on when i was around 5 years old……who would have known that pizza crunchabungas would have stolen my heart back then. i actually remember sitting with my little sister, playing with our toys, and eating a whopping two whole bags of those damn things. my dad still brings up how disgusting they were, but i loved them.

Ghosted by Leigha @ 05/30/2007 8:27 PM EDT

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