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11/16/2005: Christmas candies & the dolphin dream.

Dream Diary: I have no idea where this one came from, but it feels like it had to have some special meaning that some dream dictionary will be able to explain to me. Apparently, I had purchased, or inherited, or otherwise obtained…a live dolphin. A huge motherfucking dolphin, more gregarious than Flipper, shinier than silver, who swam to and fro in this big manmade ditch in front of my old house. I loved this dolphin. Because of the nature of dreams and how the relativity of positions and whatnot didn’t apply, whatever that means, I was able to chill out with my dolphin as he swam around, but never actually get wet myself. Then someone — I don’t know who, but someone official — told me that the watery ditch wasn’t proper for the dolphin, and that I’d either have to give him up or spend the cash needed for an adequate tank. Realizing that I didn’t have that kind of money, I looked at the dolphin and realized that he had to go. Then I woke up. Whenever the fun gets spoiled in my dreams, I wake up. I guess that’s okay.

I’m digging this. Christmas Christmas, everywhere, and I’ve managed to keep myself in check. I’m not blowing my wad with overexcitement before December, and for me, this is a major triumph. Phase 2 of the plan entails me making sure I spread out my remaining vacation days from work adequately enough to not lose the season in a sea of God damned Dora commercials. That said, it’s been nice. The Christmas music’s been nice. Going to Best Buy and seeing the little special area for holiday-related DVDs has been nice. Thinking about how the apartment we’re moving into soon will enable us to have a real dining room for next Christmas is nice. As I write this, Nat’s Chestnuts came on the Jukebox. That’s nice, too.

I’m also digging all of the new candy, which in some cases isn’t so much “new” as it is “back for another shot,” but whatever, it’s candy with snowflake-drenched packaging, and I’ll never fall out of love with that. Shown above are just four of the many things I’ve picked up recently, including medallion-shaped Nestle Crunch and Butterfinger bars, marked with Santa Claus Is Coming To Town graphics, not just on the packaging, but also on the chocolate discs. York’s Peppermint Snowflake just feels right, as nobody has ever eaten a Peppermint Patty in the history of Peppermint Patties and not thought of snow. Finally, Russell Stover’s White Chocolate Peanut Butter Jingle Bell is good, but not good enough to warrant a name that takes 45 seconds to type. Click here to see the candies opened and mutilated.

Survey: What are some of your more personal holiday traditions? I know you eat dinner with your family, I know you get presents, I know you try to watch Charlie Brown and your local tree lighting ceremony. But what’s some of the more personal ones? One of mine is the Christmas season Sunday newspaper scouring, a ritual that begins the first weekend of November. I just scour the circulars that come with the Sunday papers for anything Christmassy, from Target catalogues with a bunch of red ribbon graphics to one-page offers for ceramic angels with “HOLIDAY” etched over their asses. Your turn.

For more information about dung beetles, click here.

My husband daughter and I load up in the car, buy hot chocolate and popcorn and drive around for about 4 hours looking at decorated homes. We listen to christmas music while we do this, then we stop at an all night diner and have a bite to eat. My husband and I have done this since we married 8 years ago… its my favoriite part of christmas!

If you ask me, I like to walk around my neighborhood and beyond on Christmas Eve just looking at Christmas lights. It’s lonely albiet, but then again…I’m a very lonely person…pity…

I still play with my toys as if I was still 6, except I have better plotlines now. Well every christmas eve I get to open one gift. Then I turn on A Christmas Story on tbs or whatever channel that it’s on. I play with my toys and watch the best Christmas movie ever! Yeah!

The day after thanksgiving, I eat all remaining halloween candy, look at christmas ads, and watch some of those Rankin-Bass animated specials that I have taped.
I try to jump start myself into the season.

Every year, my family busts out a terribly embarassing video of all of us dressed in tie-dyed red longjohns dancing and singing to a cassette we had just gotten: The Simpsons Sing the Blues. I was 7 or so, so my little sister and I can be forgiven, but my brother playing guitar on a dog bone, and my dad’s ass coming into the shot every so often cannot. However, I did the lamest white boy dance ever (somewhere between the running man, and the accidentally-stumbled-into-Soul-Train shimmy). Not many people have seen that video, but it’s always been a tradition in my house.

This year, I’m going to make the drinking of the Jones sodas a tradition. Wish me luck!

Being in Radio and loving Christmas, I started a tradition a couple years ago of reading "’Twas The Night Before Christmas" on, you guessed it, Christmas Eve. Since I do the night show, I usually run it about 9pm. I always pre-record it so I don’t screw up, then I’ll just turn up the studio monitors real, real loud and stand at the big picture windows and look out over northwest Oklahoma City whilst drinking hot cocoa. We usually play a couple Christmas songs afterwards, one of which is Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas since it’s one of my favorite Christmas songs. It’s actually really nice and I’m lucky to have a boss that allowed me to start that tradition.

The only other thing would be that my fiance and I always make a much bigger deal out of our stockings than other presents. We stuff those things so full they usually have to sit on the ground because the nails in the apartment walls won’t sustain any longer.

Putting the ceramic ornament featuring Snoopy’s pal Woodstock driving a firetruck while donning a Santa cap on the Christmas tree…I used to get so pissed when my brothers or my parents would try to put it on the tree…

Usually a week before Halloween I start scouring the Home Shopping Network to see if they’ve started to sell their cheap mini-light encrusted wreaths and topiaries. I also keep a lookout for those Time Life Christmas album commercials that seem to have become increasingly scarce in the last couple of years. Every night up until Christmas Eve I watch every one the Christmas specials I’ve accumulated over the years…A Very Brady Christmas, the Saved by the Bell Christmas special, Flintstones Christmas(the one from the origianl series), Christmas Eve on Sesame St., an X-men Christmas, the Grinch and Charlie Brown, and my personal all time favorite A Muppet Family Christmas. Oh… I also absolutly cannot miss the yearly broadcast of Toronto’s Santa Claus Parade (Canada’s equivalent to Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade). Something about that constant barage of marching bads playing Frosty the Snowman while people dressed up as upside-down clowns dancing around the Mother Goose float always makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. It’s on this weekend!

When the Christmas season begins…the real Christmas season, when it’s actually cold and people put up their lights, not the "season" that begins on June 15th with everybody in the world trying to sell you Christmas crap…
Yeah, screw it, that set of ellipses just got completely out of hand. Start over.
When the Christmas season begins, I like to go to the park over by the mall. There, they have a massive set of Christmas decorations, huge sculptures made of wire and tiny flashing lights. It’s beautiful, and where else are you going to find a four-block-square Christmas display called "Festival of Lights" without even a hint of irony or shame? Anyhow, I’ve done it every year since I came to college here. The day before I go home for the holidays, I go to the Festival of Lights *snicker* without any of my friends, about an hour before it closes, when hardly anyone is there. Then I just walk around and look at the lights. It sounds trite, but at this point it is quite possibly my favorite part of Christmas, above and beyond all the family and fellowship and crap.
That probably says something rather unattractive about me as a person.
Anyway, I think this year I’m gonna go quite a bit earlier, when the place is still full of families and people. Then I’m gonna whip snowballs at all the kids till the cops drag me away. "You little peckers! I’m still eating three packets of candy corn a day because none of you bothered to knock on my door for Halloween! Eat slush and die!"
Ahh. Christmas.

Well, last Christmas I had the flu so there was a lot of "not leaving my bed" and "carrying a bucket" around. I think those’re some good traditions to keep.

Since my parents are English (though I was raised here in the U.S.)we always have Christmas crackers with dinner on Christmas Eve. Our personal tradition is that everyone wears their Christmas cracker paper hat all evening, and if someone gets sick of wearing it and takes their hat off, you can punch them in the arm.

Another tradition we started is that on Christmas morning the youngest family member puts on a santa hat and picks a present from under the tree, eyes closed. If it’s for them, they have to put it back; if not, they give it to the recipient, who opens it and everyone gets to see what they got. Then that person puts on the hat and goes to get another present, and so on. It’s a great way to make gift time last longer.

I son’t do anything out of the ordinary, but I have to watch every christmas special… EVER. Christmas Eve on Sesame Street is reserved for Christmas Eve, along with anything else muppet related. Cartoon Network always has a crazy marathon, and I even dig into the untraditional christmas films like Edward Scissorhands and Gremlins. If it happened around Christmas time, it must be watched…

One thing that I can always, always remember doing as a kid was getting up at like, oh, 3 a.m. and sneaking out to the living room with my trusty flashlight to check out the haul. If the Christmas tree wasn’t on, I’d plug it in, because nothing is better than that moment where it’s still dark out and the only light is the multicolored tree lights and all the glorious, glorious wonders are wrapped up under the tree.

I’d usually check out who, between me and my little brother, got the most presents, and who got the biggest present. I’d see how many presents I got from Santa vs. my parents. Plus, I’d take every everliving thing out of my stocking and try to figure out what they were. And then check on my parents every ten minutes until they FINALLY woke up (at like, 6-7 am) so we could open stuff.

My little brother is five years younger than me, so once he got to be old enough to not cry like a bitch if I woke him up, he’d join me and we’d whisper away, trying to figure out what we got and fake-fighting over who got the most/biggest presents.

Now that we’re older (he’s almost 18, I’m 23), he and I usually do the once-over real quick at some early hour and then go back to sleep till it’s a more reasonable time to wake the parents up. It’s not the same, but it’s keeping up the tradition in some form.

Another thing we do that isn’t exactly a tradition but happens every year just the same is the grand family fight that occurs whenever we put up the Christmas tree. Dad’s already pissed off from having to untagle 900 million feet of lights, my brother’s smart mouth is getting him into trouble, Mom’s running around screaming that we CAN’T have two RED bulbs next to each other, and do we really need to put EVERY single ornament back on the tree, and I’m trying to stay out of it but getting dragged in anyway. It usually ends up with Dad getting royally pissed off and someone’s feeling’s getting hurt. Ah, good times. Good thing my family’s dysfunctional like that and we don’t stay mad at each other long.

I love Christmas and I love you, Matt, for reminding me time and again of that fact. I’m really, really looking forward to X-E’s festivities this year.

Herronbird - I like that way of giving out gifts on Christmas morning. Every year my brother and I always manage to bitch about who has to pass out presents (mostly because we’re lazy and don’t like to keep bending over and picking up packages). We might have to try that this year.

My parents still humor my little brothers and I by continuing the Santa business of filling stockings and leaving out unwrapped presents mysteriously in the night. I am now 24! My brothers and I religiously wake up at 4am and rendezvous in the back room for a "mission briefing". We wait for the right moment, then sneak into the living room using command tactics and liberate presents one by one, as though they were our buddies trapped behind enemy lines. The stockings are always first. The challenge is not waking the parents, as their room is adjacent to the living room. Also, working in pitch-blackness adds a great deal of excitement. Just what is this book-shaped thing I am holding anyhow!?

Hey Snogurt, how come we do just about the same thing but yours sounded more fun?

Oh, and Matt…I’m getting you something for Christmas this year. Don’t worry, it can be sent through e-mail. You’ll just have to wait till Dec. 25th to find out what it is.

Pittsburgh has an event in late November called Light-Up Night. Everyone within a fifty-mile radius goes downtown and to walk around and listen to bands play Christmas songs, hear choirs singing, look at the department store windows, see a nativity, and see the entries in the gingerbread house contest, among other things. The best part is they set up an ice-skating rink in the middle of PPG Place (a courtyard area) with a huge Christmas tree in the middle sponsored by the local electric company, and some kid gets to plug it in. I. love. it.

I also invite my friends over to my house to watch the old Christmas specials with commercials - there’s nothing quite like nostalgia to add to the warm, comforting feeling of Christmas.

Oh, and P.S. - we just moved into our first apartment with a dining room and it’s awesome. Have fun with that, Matt.

Right. So I just spent some time wading through some truly atrocious web design, and I think I have your dream more or less pinned down. For the main part of your dream, I found this:

"These amusing, intelligent mammals are a sign of advancement through your own mental vigor, but other details of your dream should also be considered, such as the condition of the water, the location and/or action of the dolphin, etc."

"To dream of a dolphin, indicates your liability to come under a new government. It is not a very good dream."

Also, dreaming of somebody diving into water apparently denotes the consumation of happy dreams and passionate love. A ditch indicates degradation and wrong-doing. Unless you jumped over the ditch, in which case you will live down any suspicion of wrong-doing. Seeing official figures in your mind (the ones who wanted to take flipper) is a sure and certain sign that the government is trying to hack into your brain. Don’t bother with the tinfoil hat, they’re bullcrap.
So obviously, based on the elements of your dream, you want to have sex with a dolphin. And yet you know it’s terribly, terribly wrong. Unless you jumped over the ditch, in which case you’re golden. And the government wants you to stop, I guess. But wait! Since the secondary super bonus meaning of the dolphin is "liability to come under a new government," it’s not your current government who is trying to hack into your brain. Obviously, you’re well within range of the CN Tower, so it’s the Canadians who are trying to break in. And, as we all know, all Canadians are 100% bang alongside bestiality. So they were there to convince you to move to Canada and pursue your deviant lifestyle, free of legal entanglements.
See? Dreams are perfectly simple and straghtforward, if you have the right tools. Along those lines, it’s really amazing how often the right tools are found on free webhosting.
Incidentally, I didn’t make any of those interpretations up. They’re all from various "dream dictionaries" scattered around the net. Well, except the part about the government trying to hack into your mind. That’s just common sense.

Now, if I got the gist of most of those sites, I’m pretty sure you owe me ten bucks now. Mon.

I hate threadjacking my own thread because this is a great one so far, but Jedoc, to continue with your detective skills, I’ve narrowed down my dream to three buzzwords: dolphin, money and loss.

Dolphin: "To see a dolphin in your dream, symbolizes spiritual guidance, your intellect, mental attributes and emotional trust. Utilize your mind to its capacity and you will move upward in life. Alternatively, it suggests that a line of communication has been established between the conscious and unconscious aspects of yourself. Dolphins represent your willingness and ability to explore and navigate through your emotions."

Money: "To dream that you lose money, signifies temporary unhappiness in the home and a few setbacks in your affairs. You may be feeling weak, vulnerable, and out of control in your waking life. Additionally, you may be lacking ambition, power and self-esteem. "

Loss: "To dream that you lose something may mean that you really have misplaced something that you had not realized yet. It may also be a signal for you to clean out and reorganize your life. You have become overwhelmed and distracted with the hustle and bustle of day-to-day life."

Holy friggin’ accurate. Especially for a dream that happened after the day I had yesterday.

I love coming up with fun holiday traditions. I like to watch "It’s a Wonderful Life" every Christmas Eve. I wasn’t able to secure a room in my parents’ house to do that last year, but I might see if I can try again this year.

I go shopping with a girlfriend from college around the middle of the month. We meet at one of the local malls, exchange gifts, and get our presents for our families together. We were roommates in college, but we live in different parts of the state now and don’t see each other nearly as much as we’d like.

We used to open one present each on Christmas Eve when we were younger. I wouldn’t be surprised if we revived that tradition when my nephew gets old enough to be really excited about the holidays. Dad always makes this huge, artery-blocking breakfast after all seven of us open gifts. Later, after everyone’s rested and played with their new stuff (including the adults), Mom and Dad take us all out to one of the fancier places in Cape May for Christmas Dinner.

Before I participate with the survey, I have 2 things to say. 1st-Thanks for another jukebox.
2nd-On one of the other blogs people were discussing Matt being apart of the I LOVE THE 80’s shows. Fair enough but NOW VH1 HAS GONE TOO FAR AND ARE RIPPING OFF X-E DIRECTLY WITH:I LOVE THE HOLIDAYS. I know Matt doesn’t have the market cornered on the holidays (yet…) but c’mon!! Anyone else feel my rage?

Christmas traditions: Used to go to Hardee’s before we got our tree when I was a kid. Lately though, Mrs. Manimal are trying to get our own feel. E.Claire will probably help out a lot. VERY EXCITIED!!

Oh, I see. So given two equally viable interpretations of the same dream, you just automatically gravitate towards the one that suggests that you’re not sexually attracted to aquatic mammals? Awfully convenient, if you ask me.

Getting back on topic, reading some of these entries reminded me that some people actually open all their presents on Christmas day. In my family, starting when I was about eight years old, we always open one present apiece every Sunday of Advent. Then on Christmas, we open our "Santa" presents, as well as whatever’s left in our stockings. Like chocolate oranges. Because, you know, our parents are brats who can’t wait for Christmas any more than we can. Heh.

I always watch the He-Man She-Ra Christmas special.I recorded it off of USA in 1989 and I’ve been watching it since I was 3.That special is terrible,yet hilarious at the same time.How can Skeletor being filled with Christmas spirit get any less funny? I liked the review you did too.I seriously thought I was the only one on Earth who remembered it other than maybe the animators and voice actors(doubt it).It’s got a lot of commercials you’ve reviewed too,like the Santa’s helper hotline.It also has a commercial for The Wizard,an annoying Fruity Pebbles commercial where Barney raps,Bouncy Babies,My First Sony,and an old school Honey Combs commercial.But yeah,the He-Man She-Ra Christmas Special is beyond horrible,but that’s what makes it so great.I wonder,was Hord-Prime ever in the He-Man or She-Ra series?Luckily those annoying kids weren’t!

Manimal - We used to have the Hardee’s tradition…until the evil Carl’s Jr. took over. I remember eating fried chicken from Hardee’s every Christmas Eve.

My mother puts the tree up within 1 week after Thanksgiving and starts putting presents underneath for WEEKS just to torture me until Xmas morning. When I was younger I’d grab a scissors, gently undo the scotch tape on my presents, peek in to see what it was, then tape them back up.

Not complaining for one second for your tireless efforts but no CHRISTMAS IN THE STARS or JOHN DENVER AND THE MUPPETS?

Seems like they would be right up their on your list.

My brother and I wake up early on Christmas morning, but the "rule" in our house was that we could not wake up my parents before 5:00am. So we would stay in my room and watch the clock, counting down the minutes (sometimes one of us would sleep while the other kept watch…only 1 hour and 22 minutes left…) etc. Then at 4:59am, one of us would stand at the door ready to run, and the other would sit on the bed and watch the clock, and yell when it turned 5:00am "go!" and then we would both run across the house yelling "Merry Christmas" After waking my parents up, we open our stockings, eat hominy and sausage for breakfast, and then open the presents under the tree. We still do this pretty much every year (sometimes we wake up a bit later now, but we still do the running across the house thing), I am almost 23, and my brother is 21.

These post are long and scary. I don’t have any unique personal traditions because everyone in my family hates each other so we just meet up, eat and then leave before someone shoots someone else. That’s kind of a personal tradition right? The tradition of not shooting each other despite all temptation?

I had a dream last night about Crystal Pepsi. It was about me finding the last of the Crystal Pepsi in the world. I had a can, 1-liter, 2-liter and one of those long thin cans that they don’t even sell Pepsi in. The dream was about me getting angry because I couldn’t take a single picture and get all of the items in it at once while focused. After about 5 hours of me moving the can behind the other can then back around a monkey bit my cousin in the front room and started throwing antiques around. Finally the monkey killed me.

Oooh, let me, I’m good at this now! dohopoki, you had that dream because you are obviously a crazy person. Like, holy crap, look at that dream. Go take some pills so that you’re not so crazy anymore.
Okay, fine, there’s a slim chance that my interpretation may be a little off. But probably not.
Oh, and, uh…it also signifies that you should give me ten dollars.

Talking about the circulars and looking at all the holiday sales made me think about the Sears Christmas Wish book. The thing was bigger than the telephone book and all the toys inside were set up in elaborate displays GI Joes driving around in jungle terrain shooting up Cobra, Optimus Prime looking too cool for words and ready to blast Starscream to ash, Star Wars, glorious Star Wars at least 3 to 4 pages worth of Star Wars toys and pictures. I remember getting the wish book in the mail and sitting on the couch all afternoon with a pen or magic marker and circling everything I wanted for Christmas… the whole book was circled by the time I was done (except the dolls section of course, that was ripped out and given to my sisters. They couldn’t have the book, but they could have the 9 pages of pink) and then after I finished going through it cover to cover, I’d start all over again. It was one of the best things to do around Christmas. Now I look at the Target "Toy Book" and it’s 20 pages of bland small pictures and a few coupons. Toy’s R Us’ is worse…. I miss the Sears Wish Book.

Here’s another. Every year me and my mom put up the christmas tree together. The Star Wars ornaments go up first and then all of the others are put on. Now here’s where I’m breaking tradition. Before this year the ornaments were all in their own areas. Star Wars, Star Trek (they’re my moms ornaments I swear!), national monuments and so forth. But this year I’ve decided to spread the ornaments around. Equality for all ornaments! Me and my mom finished decorating the tree sunday!

Am I going nuts, or is Manimal confused? I don’t see any differences between this jukebox and the one from last year, yet I get the impression from Manimal that it is different? I thought Matt was just linking again to the old one…*scratches head*

Didn’t mean to start anything with the jukebox.
I thought the I LOVE THE HOLIDAYS debacle would be more provocative than arguing about the jukebox…

We have "Beary Merry Christmas" which is an advent calendar made of soft fabric. The thing itself depicts a huge house with things going in each room. Every day until Christmas there’s instructions, such as "Today Bear looked for Christmas under the kitchen table…" I love that thing so much that it’s well worth drawing blood from its bent pin every day.

Suren et. al., did you know that the He-Man and She-Ra Christmas Special is coming out on DVD? Not till Dec. 6th, though. And I’m sure it wouldn’t be the same without the classic commercials, but then, nothing is.

My family always gets a REAL tree; we go to the farms and cut one ourselves. It helps to live in Oregon, where all the christmas trees are grown and shipped. No middleman fee involved.

Our house is stuffed with traditions, from the stick-on window decorations to the holiday-themed cassettes we’ve played every year since 1993 to the impossibly delicious sugar cookies with the giant Hershey Kiss in the middle. (You can’t buy those cookies, unless you want to buy them from my mom.)

At some point before the holiday, my family watches Emmett Otter’s Jugband Christmas and A Muppet Family Christmas. Christmas Eve on Sesame Street usually gets in there too, among others (we still have original tapes of The Smurfs Christmas, Glo-Worms Christmas, ALF Christmas…all kinds of goodness).

My family goes to our church’s candlelight service on Christmas Eve evening. Then we go out driving and looking at Christmas lights. Then we come back and get first crack at the Christmas cookies my mom made. My dad makes cocoa. We hang our stockings. My dad dons a Santa hat and reads us The Night Before Christmas from the same book he used when we were little. Then, it’s bed.

We get up around 7 for presents. Usually we went to my grandma’s for Christmas, but she died a few days after Christmas last year. New traditions to be forged, I suppose.

don’t trust those dream dictionaries. Different people have different dream language. At least according to Jung .

Anywayyy, my grandma always makes this strange egg bread concoction.. and I think we usually decorate the tree while "it’s a wonderful life" is on. I’ve never actually seen the majority of that movie, however.

In the weeks leading up to Christmas, my sister and I always have to get together and watch a set of Christmas movies. Every year we find our tapes of Santa Claus: The Movie, The Christmas Toy, and The Ref.

The Christmas Toy is a bit special because our parents recorded it way back in the 80’s before they had cable. So the tape is full of snow and static, but we don’t care. As far as I know it was only shown on TV that one and only time. What I wouldn’t give to get a fresh copy of that movie.

My mom loves to go "Christmas lightlooking" with anyone she can fool into getting into the car.

On Christmas morning my family and I always make blueberry muffins for breakfast. I have no clue how this tradition was started but every year of my life we’ve done it. Come hell or high water we’ll have blueberry muffins in the house for that day.

After breakfast we would go to see my grandparents and get gifts from them. But sadly most of them have passed on and it’s been reduced to seeing my grandma on Christmas Eve.

No decorations, etc until after Thanksgiving. The day after Thanksgiving, out come the decorations and in goes the Christmas playlist. I listen to Mostly Mannheim Steamroller. Over and OVER. Until Jan. 6th.

I always make it a habit to play old school video games more around Christmas, especially as I grow older and have less time to play games.

But perhaps the greatest tradition has to be watching "Scrooge" (The musical) and "A Tuna Christmas"

I also miss the Sears wish book. I remember poring over that thing for HOURS. The TRU "Big Toy Books" used to be a lot better, too.

Did anyone else have the tradition of St. Nick’s day or whatever? It was like December 6th and your parents were supposed to put some little gifts in your shoes while you were sleeping? My parents did it for a few years and then gave up. I remember getting a really shity gift one time like a single Lego person, and I wrote St. Nick a note telling him that I was really dissapointed.

Also, parents are usually divided into those who wrap presents that are supposed to be from Santa, and those who leave them unwrapped. My parents were smart and left all the gifts that were supposed to be from the big man unwrapped. I knew Santa was too busy for that shit anyway.

Mine would be having trouble sleeping the night before. Even if I wear myself out and have no real reason to look forward to Christmas day. Then again, I don’t think it counts if I don’t do it on purpose…

1. Every year we watch Scrooged at least once. It’s our personal It’s A Wonderful Life.

2. In Fresno we have Christmas Tree Lane, a street with some of the most beautiful (and expensive) houses in town, all of which go out of control funky on the lights and the decorations and NOELs and stuff. Most of the month, it’s crowded with cars, but there are two ‘walking days’ a year where people get to take their time and walk down the street with cocoa and eggnog and stuff. It’s excellent. We try to attend both walking days.

3. After last year’s tree shortage, the new tradition is to go to Cobb Ranch and cut one down ourselves. I hope this year we don’t get one of those ones that leaves your arms all itchy.

4. For decorating the tree, there’s always a box of See’s candy at hand, and if possible, chocolate-covered popcorn. Candy generally ends up being the night’s meal, but if people are still hungry, we get Chinese.

5. Our actual Christmas strongly resembles the one from "A Christmas Story, in that each gift is opened one at a time, and whoever opened the last present gets to pick the next present. The first round of gifts is given in ascending order of age (I think this is a Danish tradition?), but after that it becomes a jagged path from person to person. Christmas morning generally lasts from three to five hours, woo.

6. I’ve never made a gingerbread house before, but I spent this year taking a Baking and Pastry class in a trade school, so new tradition starts this year. When the house itself is complete, I plan to top myself by reproducing the original worldmap of Hyrule in gingerbread. I have no idea how long this will take. Probably be done looong after Christmas.

Someone told me that there is a newer version of a Charlie Brown Christmas special, has anyone seen this little piece of blasphemy? Is it any good?

Ok, a little wierd, but not too bad. We have dinner on Christmas Eve, but it’s always Clam Chowder. My mom (and us kids before we all abandoned ship) would spend most of the day making this huge pot of clam chowder, all the while fending of the invading forces (dad) untill it was ready.

We also unwrapped one gift (one of the "small ones" [read:socks]) a night for 3 nights before Christmas. I think it was the submission to four screaming kids about wanting to open presents that eventually lead to a tradition.

Oh, and a Life-Savers Story Book, every year, for as long as they’ve made them. Now all the spouses and grandkids get them too. I think the folks are blowing a Benjemin just on those, these days.

Last night, I dreamt I was playing Civilization 4. As soon as I woke up, I looked that up in the dream dictionary, and it said: "This dream indicates that you want to play Civilization 4." So, you know, I’ma go play Civilization 4.

My family also does the cruising around and looking at Christmas lights thing.
My personal tradition is waiting until the night before I have to catch my train home to wrap all my presents and I do so while watching It’s A Wonderful Life and spiking my own hot chocolate. Then I bawl like crazy at the ending.
And then on Christmas Eve, after my sister and I get in our yearly bitchfight, we settle down to watch The Muppet Family Christmas and pee ourselves laughing over stupid Beaker and the stupid icy patch.
Really, THAT’S the true meaning of Christmas.

I’m in KC, Missouri. Never saw Christmas Crunch in Oklahoma last year…maybe it’s bigger this year. Matt, you need a box mailed to you or is where you are at this year?

Christmas traditions include driving out to the town I grew up in and going way off the beaten path to these two houses where you just know one neighbor is in a competition with the other neighbor for who can outdo who on the Christmas decorations. These two yards in the middle of nowhere have more decorations in each one than are in some towns. Amazing. It will be very sad if they ever stop.

Also, watching National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation with my wife’s family and A Christmas Story with my family.

And the latest one is just the wife and I going for a walk through the snow and catching snowflakes on our tongues until we get freezing cold and it’s dark out, then going in the house. She makes the hot tea and I make a nice fire in the fireplace. Then we just hang out on the couch with the only light coming from the fire and the Christmas tree lights.

Not sure how it started, but every christmas I watch the entire Star Wars trilogy. Started doing it about 9-10 years ago, stopped briefly because my tapes were lost now I can start it again since I got the DVD set.

No Jones Soda yet, two weeks behind in my classes (due to my books not getting ordered properly), my Texans sucking, and Eddie dying…

Well, my wife plans on showing the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving DVD next week to her first graders and will be recreating the dinner that Snoopy prepared and Matt recreated.

I wonder if Matt would like photos of the event? If my Jones Soda comes in on time, I can gross out her kids by drinking that at the shindig.

I’m sure we will also be attending a teacher’s potluck Thanksgiving this weekend, I pray we never host, because our house is always trashed. That is what happens when you have three children…

It is only the second year, but I guess it is a tradition: Going to my mother-in-law’s house in England for Thanksgiving. Last year, my wife and I were both dragging ass, me because I’m fat, but she was pregnant and didn’t know it. I have no excuse. lol

Well, I won’t have watched the traditional football games for two years now. Sigh, that sucks…

Matt, this survey thing was a great idea. I’m enjoying reading about everyone’s traditions, and it’s giving me ideas for ones to start for Christmas 2006, as my boyfriend and I will be moving in together this January. I’m afraid I’m going to go overboard buying stuff this year that I won’t get to use till next year. I’m going to try to confine myself to after-Christmas clearance. (It won’t work.)

I miss the Sears Big Toy Book, too…I’d completely forgotten about that thing. Hours of my young life were spent, even way after Christmas, poring through its pages. Is my memory padding it, or did that thing used to be as thick as the regular catalog? Kids today don’t know what they’ve missed. *sigh*

Good survey Matt! I really like that you brought the same background back for this season, it’s a good one.
Frito-Although I never went there on Christmas I am totally with you on the Hardee’s thing. Down with Carl’s Jr.
I have so many traditions concerning the Holidays. Mostly I just try and do something every day that is drenched in Christmassy fun. I am always the one to decorate early. At my old coffee shop in Seattle, I would put up a nativity and "winter" scene. We didn’t have any regular figurines, so we used Homies. Now being in the Midwest we get snow, so looking at lights is alot prettier. There’s also a Christmas parade called Hollidazzle downtown Minneapolis that begins the Friday after Thanksgiving and goes every day till Christmas. I go the opening night and then at least once more during the season.
I think my favorite part of the Holidays is the Mall. Putting on a warm sweater and going to the mall and smelling the leather, and perfume, and cinnabuns, and the frickin’ huge trees and kid’s school choirs singing in the common areas, and santa lines. Well I could add to that forever.

We used to celebrate St. Nick’s day as well and then one year it died out and it wasn’t for like another 3 years where we were like "hey! what the hell happened to gifts on the 6th" :P One year I got King Zarkon and Prince Lotar action figures and I was kinda bummed but then come Christmas I got the 5 lions… man that was a good year.

There are quite a few traditions that my family has… most of which I won’t be able to do this year!

Christmas last year was really sucky. My husband had been ‘detained’ by the US Immigration service (looooong, frustrating story), and so Christmas morning I went to visit him in prison. Christmas sucks when the only contact you get with your husband is through a pane of glass for half an hour.

This year, because the government won’t let him back in the US for another ten years, I have to choose between going home for Christmas to be with my family… or being with my husband. It’s a tough choice, but I just don’t think that after last year I want to miss another Christmas with him!

So I’m going to be in England now, which requires the abandonment of many old traditions. I won’t be able to cower in shame at the old paper ornaments my brother and I made when we were kids (that Santa’s face looks psychotic!), won’t be able to sit through three unending hours of gag gifts at my grandmom’s, won’t be able to go to the midnight service at the church I grew up in. I won’t be there to see the look on my cat’s face when my parents dish out her traditional huge tub of yogurt and tin of tuna. I won’t be there when the immense amounts of wrapping paper are burnt in the fireplace, or when we take the tree out into the back yard and torch it.

On the plus side, this means I get to start up new traditions, right? One of the things I did last christmas that I hope to make a tradition is going to a Handel’s Messiah sing-in…

They don’t show A Christmas Story over here. It’s too quintessentially American to translate well, I guess… but last Christmas my dad bought me a DVD, so I’ll be able to watch it with my husband and in-laws. It won’t be quite the same, but some things must be maintained.

My mother lives for Christmas and greatly misses the Christmases that my brother and I were small children dancing to Smurf Christmas records around the Christmas tree. My brother and I are now in our twenties, but we still love us some Smurfs and our mom. So, every year, just once, we pull out our old Smurf Christmas record and we dance around the Christmas tree with our mother.

I just want to know, WHERE THE HECK ARE ALL YOU PEOPLE!!?? It always seems as though I am the only one who gets all jacked up for the holidays, but apparently there’s others of you out there. You can all be in my special secret club.

I miss the huge Sears Wish Book of Christmasses long ago!!! These leaflets they are printing out now just are not doing it for me. I remember countless hours spent circling item after item that I wished for Santa to bring to me. I was quite the greedy child, so this led to hours of fun. Now, it’s just a quick flip through the pages and it becomes a coaster for my coffee mug.

For the month of December I take my dog walking around the neighborhood in search of "LOUD XMAS DISPLAYS!". Im hoping that we wont be disappointed this year.

I also try to cram in my old Taped of TV xmas specials. I have an episode of Doogie Howser in the mix somewhere!

Glad to see that there are still people to take the time to indulge in their childhood obsessions during the holidays!

Double G: Wow, I’m always so surprised to find other Islanders that read this site.

Christmas eve my brother and I get to open one gift. It is always a new pair of PJ’s. Then before we go to bed we watch A Christmas Story, we also might throw in the first simpsons episode/first christmas episode. Upon waking up, we have to wait until all the lights are on and the candles are lit and all the music is playing before we open up our presents. In more recent years (I am now 24 and my bro is 18) our mom has woken us up at 6am with every all set, so we didn’t have to wait.

This christmas will be extra special this year because it will be the last one that I will be living at home.

kb, I would be honored to be in your special secret club! What shall we call it?

(Hey, have any Jem fans noticed that the little red star thingie that replaced Boo looks like Jerrica’s Jemstar earrings? Heehee.)

Heh, born and raised. I always an a feeling you were an Islander, nice to see I was right.

I didn’t realize it until this thread, but i apparently have holiday traditions. i wait until the week of Christmas to wrap all of my presents. i wrap them on my livingroom floor while watching "christmas vacation" and drinking some sort of alcoholic beverage. and my best friend and i usually spend at least one entire day at the mall shopping for gifts. no boyfriends or anyone else allowed. that might be the one i like the most since it’s a whole day with just us girls. then, she and i will go to a local bar and come home and decorate her mom’s christmas tree. you haven’t lived until you’ve decorated a chrsitmas tree while you’re drunk! i also go to another friend’s family party every year. good food and yes, more drinking. hmm… i may have to cinsider the fact that i drink too much. nah, it’s the holidays, bring on the rum!

Every Christmas after dinner and dessert, and after Grandma goes home, we play a board game. Me, Mom, Dad, Brother and Sister in Law all gather ’round the dining room table and have a good ‘ol time. Most of the time we get a brand new one that day, but if not, we have quite the plethora of choices.

I really hope I don’t have to go in to work Christmas night. That will suck…

Christmas used to start for us the day after Thanksgiving. We’d all pile into the wood panelled station wagon and go pick out our tree. Afterwards we’d get food and hot chocolate. Nowadays the tree farm we always go to doesn’t tag, they open for two weekends and you have to cut your own tree down.

On Christmas eve we always have a huge family dinner. Since half my family is Italian it includes some nice seafood and all. We start the food at like 3 and go all the way into the evening. Then we go to our church’s candle light service. The service was always fun because you could hold flames in your hand without getting into trouble. Well one year someone complained to the fire department or something so now they have these stupid battery powered candle-ish things. After the service we’d cap the night with a family egg nog toast.

Christmas morning we used to start at 6, but it’s slacked off to 8 or 9 now that we’re older. We’d go through gifts by going around in a circle. When it’s your turn you pick out a gift with your name on it. Always kept everything agonizingly slow, especially when my dad faked excitement over the ties or the wallets.

Does anyone else here have the pickle tradition? I think it comes from Germany or something. There’s a green glass pickle ornament that gets put on the tree sometime between us going to bed and waking up. The first one to find the pickle ornament gets a special present. Well, it’s supposed to be special but my dad cheaps out on it. Last year was a paint by numbers of an eagle or something.

After all that we have a great big family breakfast. We’re talking pounds of bacon, mulitple dozens of eggs, gallons of orange juice and egg nog, loaves of bread to make Jesus and the multitudes jealous. Everything gets consumed and then its off to my aunts for all the extended family for the rest of the day.

Every kid was assigned an aunt and we’d get an extra gift from them. We’d run around screaming and terrorizing the dog and the girls. There’s a pond in their back yard that never ceased to provide winter-time amusement. Starting around 1 we’d have another great big Italian meal. The meal usually runs all the way until 5 when the fathers sit down to watch football and fall asleep.

We did the pickle tradition at my Oma’s but never at home. I think my mom tried to do it once and then forgot about it and it kinda fell to the wayside, but when we were kids we’d go over my Oma’s house for Christmas eve and that’s when we’d all look for the pickle ornament.

We used to do St. Nicholas day in grade school. Everyone would bring in a shoe, and then next morning they would be filled with some crappy little gift.

My favorite Christmas tradition is watching the Christmas Story for 24-hours staight on TNT. I wait until about 10 pm on Christmas Eve, and wrap all of my presents while I watch it. Then I get to bed around 3 or 4, get up at 8 and watch it all day until dinner. I look forward to that movie by far the most. I’m watching it and think "hey, didn’t I just see that part". And I realize 2 hours has gone by.

Hokay, it all starts on Thanksgiving. The Parade winds down and Big Red cruises up Turkey Canyon. CHRISTMAS!!! The CD’s go on. (My personal fave song is "A Christmas Long Ago" by the Echelons.) Then it’s outside. We begin the decorating blitz with me climbing the 50+ ft. Blue Spruce in the front yard to check on the star and connect and string the lights encircling it.
Fast Fwd to Christmas Eve.
My sis and I decorate our real tree whilst the parents are doing last-minute shopping. For dinner we go to McDonalds for dinner so our tree doesn’t fall over. (I KNOW it sounds stupid but I swear that every year we have skipped McD the tree falls.) We go sing in our parish choir at Midnight Mass. Then we sleep a few hours and wake up at an ungodly hour for presents. Truly it is the most wonderful time of the year.

‘Course, this summer I married a fish-eating Italian, so I’m pretty much screwed for tradition. Le

axgop: Holy crap, it all makes sense now. When I was maybe six years old, one of my uncles got married to an antiques dealer from Albany, New York. She moved to New Mexico to become part of our giant agrarian German Catholic clan, and for her first Christmas she got every family an antique glass pickle ornament. Now I know what she was trying to go for, and I feel pretty bad that all of us were confused, and not one of us recognized what was apparently a pretty cool gesture. That had to have been the most depressing Christmas ever. Damn.

bloodybrilliantme
Someone told me that there is a newer version of a Charlie Brown Christmas special, has anyone seen this little piece of blasphemy? Is it any good?

There are actually 2 of them, one is a collection of short cartoons starring the peanuts gang, whose title escapes me right now. THIS one is pure blasphemy due to the voice cast alone. Especially the one for Sally, she sounded like she inhaled some air from the Snoopy ballon from the Macy’s Parade. The other one I can actually remember: "I Want A Dog For Christmas, Charlie Brown," and it mainly stars Rerun, the little brother of Linus & Lucy. A bit better than that previous one, and the voice cast is much better, but still not that great.

And I, too miss the Sears Wish Book and the Toys R Us "Big Toy Book" no longer lives up to its name.

And as most of you probably know, I’m an Islander too and I have a new X-E Mission: to find the Jones Regional Pack. If you have any information, or if scott or Mr. X are out there, please give me an e-mail at Norbert5ca@aol.com . I would totally appreciate your help. And at the very least, name something after you.

I’ll hold off on listing my traditions at the moment because I’m at school right now and I need to get some work done.

Well, I try to wait as long as possible till I can’t stand not doing insane amounts of Christmasy stuff. Then, halfway into November (because Halloween rocks and Thanksgiving is a fake/lame holiday), I bust out my Santa hat, crank up the Nutcracker and decorate the apartment with EVERY SINGLE christmasy item I own. After doing so tonight, had THE BEST evening for cool holiday stuff:

Went to Target, snagged a tree table and Playmobil Nativity Set! Last one, and on sale! Couldn’t get one for love or money within December last year.

Then, on to my local Hy-Vee (a grocery store). What did they have? OH YEAH! Christmas Crunch!! Two boxes go into my cart. Then, after giving up all hope, I hit the frozen dessert aisle.

JELLO PUDDING POPS!!!! Life is SOOO Good! This year, it’s back to the 80’s in style as I watch He-Man’s Christmas Special, eating Christmas Crunch and getting diabetes from finishing off all the "Swirl" pudding pops afterwards.

As Jessica Marie mentioned, we here in Pittsburgh have "Light Up Night" tomorrow. I have to admit, it’s pretty cool to see the city busy with activity when i’m heading home from work, but you probably couldn’t pay me to stay in town late after work on a friday. i can see the giant tree lit up on any given night after that, when the city is a ghost town after 5 pm.

Every year, the season doesn’t start until certain requirements are fulfilled.
1. We haul the artificial tree out from storage and put the blasted thing together.
2. We haul out the smaller tree at work and set it up.
3. It gets cold enough for me to scream "Brass Monkeys, Frank! Brass Monkeys!" at the top of my lungs every time I step out the door.
4. Lawton (The city south of us) starts their "Boulevard of Lights"
5. My town, Anadarko, lights up the park with its’ "Holiday Celebration."
6. Chickasha (The city east of us) kicks off its own "Festival of Lights."
7. Radio stations play the good Christmas novelty songs. (Chipmunk Song, Christmas Rapping, Cartman singing "O Holy Night.")
8. Radio stations play the bad Christmas novelty songs. (I Shot Santa in My Underwear, Twelve Pains of Christmas, Stevie Nicks singing "Silent Night.")
9. And finally, we listen for the B. C. Clark jingle to play on the radio. (Frito knows what I mean.)
There’s plenty others, but these are the highlights.

This year, Army Sister has been making up for the holidays she missed while in Iraq last year. So, we’re probably going to hit as many light displays as gas prices will allow.

As a tradition, Thanksgiving night, after everyone has sufficiently gorged themselves, we all sit down in the living room to watch "National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation."

A lot of what takes place in the movie reminds us of our family, which I think is why it’s so popular in our household. I think it’s one of my favourite Christmas traditions.

1. I take a million walks through the drug-store to look at all the decorations for sale.

2. My Aunts, my Mother, and Myself all get together to bake a massive amount of cookies.

4. I read at least one X-Mas AAML Pokémon Fanfic and at least one X-Mas Gundam-Wing fanfic

6. I go Christmas Shopping Early in the month with my Mother and Aunt, and late in the month with my Dad.

7. I always watch "A Christmas Story" with my parents and quote our favourite scenes daily until New Years!

BTW will X-E be getting a Christmas makeover this year? (I’m sorry, I couldn’t resist). ^_^

About a week before the big day, my sister, my mom and I pile into a car and drive to the rich areas of town to check out their rediculously huge Christmas displays. It takes about two hours and we hit about five neighborhoods.

What makes this a specifically family tradition is the fact that when my sister was a kid, she had a speech impediment where she pronounced "l" like "y", so she’d lean out of the window and squeal "Yook atta yights!" the whole time. Of course she’s grown out of that now, but to this day we refer to the drive as going to "Yook at the yights."

on a serious note we would go to granparents house where we all exchange gifts-then every body could confront each other for the lame ones. My grandpa would always the sweater we got him was too big and for a fat person. Then we got to go home and open one present-I remember I almost sht my pants when i got Super Tecmo Bowl. After my Granparents passed recently its been hard to get everyone together-everyones too busy. I know that would piss my granpa off so we’re gunna do something about that this year-probably force everybody in one spot. Oh yeah and of course Christmas Story marathon!

I think every single time me or my siblings have seen the word "Fragile" we say "Fragil-ay, it’s Italian!" Every single time for the last 7 years at least!

My all time favorite Christmas tradition is fighting over who gets to put the Captain Crunch ornament on the tree. We have this random 1988 cardboard Captain Crunch ornament that someone saved from a cereal box and my sister and I always bicker over it.

Scratch that, my favorite tradition is beating my sister’s ass and getting to put up said ornament.

Ok. I need help from you guys. My girfriend is sick at home today and she was wanting some good comedy to read. Is there anyway you guys can help me find a couple of the adventure posts that Matt has made?

that’s an example of what I’m talking about. I love those old posts where he would have toys go wacky. Help a brother out.

I’ve read on previous posted stuff that you take the bus home. When I use to take the bus home from collge downtown it was the best, because of all the christmas stuff decorations and lights and shopping for someone at Vicotia’s Secret!even the homeless dudes that asked me for money would say Merry christmas-even when I didn’t have money.-(any other time of the year when I said I didn’t have money they would get mad and tell me I did have money because I have a backpack and books) You also get to avoid some crazy guy in a Honda Accord rear ending you-So if you still on the bus MATT enjoy!!!

Instead of catching a cab in front of my office to go home at night, I walk to Fifth Avenue to steal one from some annoying ass tourist. As I get in, I turn to look at their exasperated faces and cheerfully remark, "welcome to New York!"

I suggest checking out Matt’s review on Atlantic City’s Crappiest Game Room. You could always have her look at last year’s Jones Hlliday Pack Review and the review on The Worst Witch, not to mention the Advent Calendars, those are some of my all time favorite articles whenever I need a laugh.

And Matt finally got rid of Boo and the Frankenstein. Now there’s ornaments and that tree branch.

For me, it’s not Christmas unless I watch The Muppet Family Christmas. I had to tape it off TV because every other year it seems to dip below the programming radar and the one year I remember not seeing it was not a good Christmas for anyone. I’d have bought the DVD, but I hear that it has a few of the musical numbers edited out due to rights issues. Also, whenever possible I try to catch Ernest Saves Christmas on TV. It’s best on TV because you can channel surf during the boring parts with the girl and watch all the good parts with Chuck & Bobby.

Well, when my whole family used to speak to each other, we used to have a nice little tradition where on Christmas Eve, just before bed, my mom would let us open our Christmas presents from our Gramma. (They were actually presents bought by Mom, in rememberance of Gramma, since she died when I was 2). When I was really little, and Gramma presents were really from Gramma, I got some pretty cool stuff. The last thing I remember getting from Gramma was a Care Bears bank (Tenderheart Bear, more specifically), where you pulled the heart on his tummy aside to find the cleverly hidden coin slot. After Gramma died, though, we got stuff like pajamas or stuffed animals. Now that my whole family hates each other (mostly), I won’t be getting a Gramma present this year… which sucks. I needed a new flannel nightgown.

Jeez Beth that sounds kind of depressing, Im sorry- I’ve learned it gets worse as you get older so now We have to make Christmas fun

-Suggestion: Next time your at Wal-Mart and see the 3 or 4 foot dancing santa-put a pair of underwear or panies(whatever is funnier) on the end of his hand. As he wiggles hips and dances he dangles them. Puts the entire store in holiday cheer!

Hey Quammy-I s that the old Muppet family christmas where they all have to sleep in one house? I have to find that again!!

I forgot to add one great read that would be perfect for your girlfriend to look at:

The 3 Part arc where Spiderman reviewed all 96 Crayola crayons. I just finished reading part 1 and I saw that there were nearly 300 comments for that article alone.

I totally posted this already but I guess I had some technical ish cause I don’t see it? About the only "unique" tradition we’ve got is going to one of those kiddie places where you paint cheap ceramic stuff…I think there’s a national chain called Color Me Mine but we’ve got a mom and pop we’ve been going to for years as we’ve amassed a giant collection of tacky painted Santa cookie jars and angel ornaments. Unfortunately the stash got left in the attic when we moved so we had to start all over last year.

Which Advent calendars (model numbers) are you using so that we can buy them and play along at home? Also, what kind of stuff do you have planned for the site this year?

I have one that nobody has mentioned yet…every year at our Wal-Mart there is an "Angel Tree." It is full of paper ornaments listing the name, age, and clothing sizes of a needy child in the area, along with a few of the toys they would like. I pick an ornament and go nuts on some kid I don’t know. It’s fun for someone without nieces or nephews to buy for, and it makes sure at least one kid in the area doesnt get cheapskated.

This has a whole catagory of "adventure" articles. message 312 is one of my favorites. ‘Cause of Fat Daddy.

I’m thinking of buying Little Brother a CD of Calliope tunes. He finds the sound of the steam pipes disturbing. Nothing drives home his point than the end of "Freaks," when Frida consoles Hans. "Don’t cry, Hans, don’t cry. I love you. Don’t cry." Cue the happy circus music!
I’m thinking of making a viewing of Freaks a X-Mas tradition for me and Little Brother. Gooble-gobba!

Our traditions are pretty much the same as everyone elses. On Christmas Eve, we gather with the family around us, and get inundated with snacks (read: cheese, crackers…so on) then order a pizza. A recent addition to this tradition would be the imbibing of shots of whatever liquor was on-hand. Then, we head to my mom’s for a present or two. Christmas day starts early, opening presents at my mom’s with my nephews, my sister and mom. We have a HUGE breakfast of apple-walnut pancakes, sausage and pierogies (started by my mom’s boyfriend). Then we lug everything home (my sis and I live together, so there is a lot to lug) and await Christmas dinner. I usually attend in my pajamas. Ahhh the virtues of laziness…

Schroeder- I remember our mom taking us to do that too. I think all kids should to that-makes you appreciate the Holiday alot more. Plus we had to rite a letter to the kid.

Christmas as a kid was the best because we had to fit in 4 Christmases in one day. We’d wake up and do Christmas at our house, then drive the two hours to visit the maternal grandparents, then a mile or two to Great Grandmas, then a block or two over to paternal grandparents. Christmas went non-stop from about 7AM (6 if my mother couldn’t stand it. She was worse than we were. More than once she’d come banging on our door, "Don’t you want to open presents?") to about midnight. It was awesome as a kid. Unfortunately, I married a guy who gets really (really) agitated if I suggest leaving the house on Christmas day, so I’ve missed out on every family Christmas since we’ve been married. This will be my fourth, and he said it’s only fair that I get my way this year, so I finally get Christmas with Grandma again. As for my current traditions:

1) I have to buy at least one gift by the end of September in order to feel like I’ve started my shopping on time (I try to spread it out over a few credit card statements.)
2)Decorations go up Thanksgiving weekend (while the 3-disc changer holds the CB Christmas soundtrack, Andy Williams, and one of the discs from the Time-Life Holiday Collection.)
3)Christmas Eve candlelight service at church
4)When my husband was a kid, their stockings would sit empty until Christmas Eve. After they were asleep, their parents would fill them, sneak into the kids’ rooms and lay their full stockings on the ends of their beds (honestly, to buy the parents a little extra time to sleep.) So, I always try to sneak his stocking onto the bed on Christmas morning (which is hard when you share the same bed. I don’t think I’ve done it yet without waking him.) It must always include, among other things, chocolate coins, a toothbrush, and lip balm (that’s what his mom always put in them.)
5) As my family did when I was a kid, we read the Christmas story from the Bible before we open presents (and try to resist the temptation to do it in Linus voice. I usually cave.)
6)Christmas decorations come down New Years day after the Rose Parade.
7)At some point in between, hubby and I take a picture of us in front of the tree. It started when we were dating as kind of a fluke (we just realized we had taken them a couple of years in a row), but now it’s a tradition.

Oh! I forgot! On Christmas Eve, we always open one present at midnight. OK, I think that’s all of them.

Every year I tell myslef I’m going to write my own Christmas song and every year I get too busy learning Christmas songs and eating and watching Muppet Christmas Carol that I fail miserably! Well this year I’m doing it. I think I’ll write a song called Christmas with Dracula.

Mostly the typical stuff, but on Christmas Day evending (Christmas Night?) we go to my grandmothers where there are roughly 4 trillion people gathered and make a huge bonfire down by the river.

We then proceed to find various ways to blow things up with hundreds of dollars worth of fireworks.

Whoo, thanks for the link to the Three Year Party thing. that will keep me busy at my desk for the next couple of weeks for sure.

The Jesus Store! That’s beautiful. Reminds me of my mom. Last year for Christmas she got my sisters and me each a bear that prays when you squeeze it. In our 20’s. "Now I lay me down to sleep…"

schroeder, you just made my day. We have those angel-type gift tree things too, though I think ours are at a local mall, and they’re candles. But same idea.

I don’t want to have children, and about the only time I think maybe I should reconsider is around the holidays…because they’re always more fun with kids around, whether they’re your siblings, nieces/nephews, friends’ brats, whatever. Thanks to you reminding me of those things, now I can lavish that holiday-inspired maternal urge on some kid who really needs it. Awesome. New tradition added to the list, definitely.

Keep ‘em coming, guys…I’m seriously going to start a list for my new apartment, here.

-when I was younger, I’d attend an Xmas part in early december at my friend’s special school (he’s deaf and it was a School for the Deaf). They were usually these elaborate parties with Santa, movie showings, games, food, and raffles. I stopped going when 1) the parties started to suck and none of the above were either not there or not that good and 2) he graduated
-Listen to my "Mr. Hankey’s Christmas Classics" cd
-I work at KB Toys, so Xmas stuff is happening already, like the music @_@
-watch the variopus Xmas specials marathons on Cartoon Network and the like
-watch "Merry Christmas, Charlie Brown" on ABC. Last year I was lucky enough that ABC showed all 3 Peanuts Xmas specials at once. I’ve mentioned them earlier so I won’t tell the story twice
-when I was younger up till a few years ago, I would go over to my aunt & uncle’s house to meet the rest of the family for an Xmas party. My 5 cousins and I would watch the Beavis & Butt-Head Xmas Special until 1) it got cancelled and 2) we grew older and stopped going
-reading When Binky The Clown Saved Christmas
-Xmas day, the grandparents would come over my house and we’d exhange gifts
-my grandma giving me the latest HESS Truck. I’ve had all of them since at least 1988/89
-the Virgin Sacrifice
-I plan on drinking my Jones holiday pack this year (and still searching for the Regional pack)
-coming here to X-E for the Advent Calendar

Mr. Hankey’s Christmas Classics is such an underrated CD! Even my mom loves that thing.

Some variations, though — I used to write final papers to The Nutcracker Suite. It was great writing music — so great that anytime now that I need to work intently on a project, I cue up "Coffee, Tea, and Spice" and I’m all set to go.

Also, for our traditional Christmas Eve dinner, my mom makes what we call nachos — which really is just a very crazy queso, including the requisitite cheese product (Velveeta. Don’t try it with that Nice ‘n’ Cheesy crap!), rotel, cream of three different kinds of soup, cheddar soup, nacho soup, and breakfast sausage. Wow. Served over Doritos for the kids and Fritos for the adults. Polish off the meal with some homemade chocolate chip cookies.

When I lived in Oklahoma City, it was never Christmas until you heard the B.C. Clarke Jewelers Anniversary Sale song on the radio. "Most sales are after Christmas, but Clarke’s is just before. Most everything is marked way down! Savings you can’t ignore…at Oklahoma’s oldest jeweler, since 1892. So give the gift you know can’t fail — from B.C. Clarke’s Anniversary Sale!" It’s such a great song, it even made the local radio station’s "Top Ten" list one season.

(For my peeps back in No Man’s Land — if you have a copy of this song, I would LOVE to have it for me and my sister!)

Also — daylight savings time has always made me think that the regular street lights, stop lights, and car brake lights are Christmas-y. So many lights! At 5:30! Oooh! Shiny!

Every year, my dad tries to think of new ways to wrap our presents. Last year he took tissue boxes and closed the top with duct tape. I love my dad.

This is something only expatriate Okies can understand. But, I’m sure there are equivilent regional ads and such that have the same effect on X-E poster kids across this great land of ours. Times were, I knew to get all crazy-go-nuts when both B C Clark and the old NOEL-co ads hit the airwaves, back before Cable, Satellite, and Internet were all widespread. Yeah, I’m old! Don’t make me hit you with my walker!

Thanks, Kingklash. I found it. I was just getting ready to post the link myself.

I’ve listened to it ten times already. I’m giddy as a schoolgirl wearing her first velvet dress to the Christmas Pageant.

And GOD I miss the Norelco ads. Surfing on an electric razor. That’s my idea of fun.

I spent the first years of my life in California, but Ma used to sing the jingle ’round Chistms time. Us kids knew it by the time we resettled in OK in ‘81. Anyone else have tales of regional sing-alongs? I dig that kind of stuff.

I’ll summarize: I heard on the radio tonight that the rocket carrying James Doohan’s ashes didn’t have the power to launch itself into space as there was an engine problem, the launch has been pushed back to at least February, and this is strange because I just today read Matt’s blog entry about his death; Billy Fuccillo is about the only memorable (and most annoying) regional admaster around these parts; and we’re getting the first lake effect snowstorm of the season which I am both giddy about and disgusted with.

God I HATE losing posts. Just read this and pretend it was longer and funny. grr.

Nicole: Best post ever. I laughed. I cried. I was transformed as a human being.
I had something to add here, but now I’ve got to go take seventeen hours to reevaluate my life. Wow.

Kingklash,
Not sure what to make of your watching FREAKS as part of your Christmas tradition but apparently you are one of us, one of us.

Well, Jedoc, I’ve no idea how to take that…either you’re being sarcastic-funny and did enjoy what I had to say, or sarcastic-asshole and you’re telling me my posts suck. That distinction is a little hard to figure out over the Internet, so help would be appreciated.

Just following orders. Pretending it was longer. Admittedly, some might say that I was assuming rather a lot of the material that was missing, but what can I say? I’m an optimist.

Ah, okay…I gotcha now.

Forgive me for being a little slow on the uptake, there. And being defensive. And ruining the joke.

Ok this has nothing to do with Christmas, but I just realized this. Was there EVER teenage mutant ninja turtle happy meal toys? I had pretty much everything TMNT and a ton of happy meal toys and I never remember seeing any. How could there not have been? Its a match made in heaven.

I usually put up my tabletop Christmas tree, beanies, and other assorted decorations on Black Friday, or Saturday.

The local tree-lighting ceremony (in Little Egg Harbor, Ocean County, New Jersey) involves a big wire Christmas tree that gets put on Lake Pohatcong (I think that’s the name) at Tip Seaman Park. It’s usually thrown on the unsuable beach during the off-season, but in November, they put it out on the lake. The Saturday after Thanksgiving, the tree gets lit at 9 pm. I’ve never actually gone to this lighting ceremony, but it gets crowded, but not the same kind of