It’s funny, just talking with the mrs. about what the phrase "the world is your oyster" came from. I mean have you seen an oyster, ewww. or does it just mean you can do anything you want with it cause it’s small and defenseless.

Chestnuts roasted by RAS @ 10/28/2005 2:35 PM

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I have an almost-two year old that doesn’t really understand Halloween yet, but the boy sure does love candy so we’re taking him to relative’s houses and such. He also loves the Batman theme song, thus he’ll be the cutest Batman in history.

Chestnuts roasted by Tritoch @ 10/28/2005 3:04 PM

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http://www.transbuddha.com/index.php/buddha/tim_curry_rules_halloween/

so cool

Chestnuts roasted by the worst witch @ 10/28/2005 3:15 PM

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the worst witch

After seeing Tim Curry sing that song right from the movie…wow. Just wow. He’s the only thing that keeps that song from being downright terrible with that great voice of his. "The effects equal Tron!" said no one.

Chestnuts roasted by Invader Norbert @ 10/28/2005 3:55 PM

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you know whats sad? I work at a shop rite, and yesterday they took down all the halloween decorations in favor for christmas ones. 4 days before halloween.

and i still cant find the damn cocoa bat peeps!!

Chestnuts roasted by Ralph @ 10/28/2005 5:24 PM

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Delay yesterday. Feel free to ignore.

The Story of Jack and His Lantern
A Hallowe’en Treat For X-Entertainment
By kingklash

Part Three: You’ve Been Kicked Out of the Afterlife, Now What?

It was nearly a year before Jack ran out of Things To Do In Ireland When You’re Dead. Afterward, he finally got down to the brass tacks of his situation. First thing he discovered is that he wasn’t a traditional ghost. He had actually died of Natural Causes, and still sticking to his wandering ways, so he had no traumatic experience or sentimentality to anchor him to any one place. He had been between schemes, so Unfinished Business was out. He was an only child, and never knew any close relatives, never had many friends, so no loved ones to bother with. He could talk to other spirits, so he did find out the whys and wherefores of their existence. He found them mostly depressing, being a “Here and Now” type of person, and ghosts, with very few exceptions, were “What Was and Never Will Be” types. While he couldn’t do many of the things Normal ghosts do, like float through the air, wail endlessly, and just generally scare the wits out of people, he had his own ways to amuse himself. He spent some time at the home of a clock maker from Germany. It seemed when his family had come to Ireland, they had also brought along a few boisterous spirits that called themselves “Poltergeists”. From them, he learned how to interact with solid objects. After that, he resumed his traveling. During that time, he discovered three things about his condition:
First, there were times he could be seen by people as a solid form. While walking down a road, he passed by a peddler who greeted him and continued on normally. It took him a quarter of a mile before it registered. While he could see himself, Jack was at first sure no one else could. At least he appeared to be in his favorite traveling clothes. He had died in his sleep after a night with a young lady who left for her home before dawn, so he was glad he wasn’t seen in that state. He quickly found out how to fade in and out of sight when he wanted, and welcomed the chance for talking to people for the hour or so a day he could manage. Of course, if he popped out in the middle of a conversation, the commotion it caused was almost worth it.
Second, while he didn’t need any kind of nourishment, he found when experimenting with being visible, he could eat and drink small amounts. He couldn’t get drunk, as any effects of alcohol faded as soon as he did. At least it was a chance to go to some old haunts, so to speak. Nobody ever seemed to recognize him, but he could still talk some drunken merchant into buying him a small meal now and then.
Finally, he was cold. Not a Dead of Winter kind of cold, but a constant, nagging kind of vaguely persistent cold. This was the only thing that truly bothered him. Once he tried to stand in the middle of a bonfire, but it only managed to take a little bit of the edge off. In fact, the last times he felt comfortable was up in Heaven and down in….
“Hell! Of all the places I would like to be, I can’t believe I have to go back and figure out how I can be warm and not have to camp out in front of those accursed black gates! He’s probably laughing at me right now!” Angrily he marched down the road that’s paved with good intentions.
Once more at the entrance to Satan’s home, Jack started in with every unflattering name he could think of, including some that knocked a couple of demons out of the sky. As the last syllable sizzled through the already-singed air, the doors opened and the Devil, holding the roasted haunch of some unknown beast, stepped through.
“You are interrupting my dinner, you know.”
“You can go back as soon as you solve the problem you caused.”
“I heard about your jump in the bonfire. Guess I am to blame, you were supposed to be Hell bound, it’s not exactly ice and snow here. Why should I do something for you? You know I’m not letting you get even a toe inside my door.”
“Well, I did help boost your Reputation, didn’t I?”
Satan nearly dropped his meat in shock, “Have you lost your mind? In what dream of yours did anything like that ever occur?! You did nothing of the kind!”
“I beg to differ. Have I or have I not got out of every temptation you have thrown at me?”
“Yes, but….”
“And every time you have come up with something more tricky and devious to catch me?”
“Yes, but….”
“Causing me to think even faster on my feet, and you to be even more, shall we say, Diabolical?”
“Yes, but…”
“So, every time I have had to up my game, it caused you to up yours, right?”
“I wouldn’t say it exactly like that, but, yes.”
“It stands to reason that your are a Smarter Prince of Darkness now than before we first met, does it not?”
“Hmm, I guess it does.”
“So, you owe me. Besides, it is written that every time You get called out, You owe seven times over the trouble You caused. I figure I still have at least a couple of markers to call in yet.”
“All right, you got me. Let me see what I can do.” Taking a bite out of the haunch, Satan chewed for a while in thought. One end was still smoldering, and as the Devil looked at it, his eyes flashed with an idea. Snapping his fingers, a beautiful Demoness appeared in a geyser of green flame. Whispering in her ear, Old Scratch outlined a few directions to her, and she left in another burst. Within a minute, she was back, holding a glowing object in her hands. She stepped over to Jack.
“This is a ember from the deepest, hottest part of my Realm. As long as you have it, you’ll never be cold, and you’ll always have light. Don’t expect me to do anything like this again, though. Just this once for old times.”
“I understand, you big red softy. Now lass, let me say, if you ever get tired of mucking about down here, come up top some time and we’ll make a night of it, yes?”
The Demoness smiled, showing an remarkable set of fangs, and nodded towards Satan, “Only if it’s all right with my Father.”
Jack never ran that fast when he was alive.

Next Time: Who Knows Where He’ll Turnip Next! or, Pumpkins? What a Bright Idea!

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash is getting his pumpkins today @ 10/28/2005 6:19 PM

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Is it just me, or is it that everytime I refresh the page, kingklash‘s post keeps getting longer?

Chestnuts roasted by Invader Norbert @ 10/28/2005 7:26 PM

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I’ve had both yogurt blast cheerios, kind of like the strawberry. So far as I can tell the vanilla is just a rip off frosted cheerios though and basically tastes the same. I got nothin’ against yogurt in general, but eating it out of a tube might feel a little odd. On the subject of cereal, I can’t find any of the big three anywhere. Which is really disappointing because I wanted to get at least one. I have seen cocoa crispies and froot loops getting into the spirit though and adding marshmellow body parts.

Chestnuts roasted by GrrrArrgh @ 10/28/2005 7:54 PM

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Meh, Halloween. I was really excited about my costume, I was going to be Jesus (I’m a girl, and I’m not christian, so it wasn’t meant that way, it was meant more in the "dead Jesus" kind of way". But then Hurricane Katrina happened, sending me to California. So now I only know a few people, and they’re all going to "lets get totally sloshed on a Monday night" parties, and I a) have to drive half an hour home and b) have a 7 am class the next day that I can’t miss. So yeah, I haven’t even gotten materials for my costume because I can’t see the point

Chestnuts roasted by Mara @ 10/28/2005 8:09 PM

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Ha ha! Tube.
Now this is the part where I threadjack and tell a story that none of you will care about. Ever seen a windfarm? Great big windmills, generators, that sort of thing? Well, the basic point of wind farms is that you put them on top of mesas in the middle of nowhere. The sort of places nobody would ever want to go anywhere. But some of the insane girls I hang around have wanted to hike out there and look at them up close since we came to college. Today, they finally got their wish.
By the way, they didn’t tell me where we were going until I actually saw the wind farm in the distance and put it all together.
So I just got back from a six-hour forced march through the most godforsaken terrain this side of Mordor. My feet feel like…well, the feet of a guy who has just been on a six-hour forced march through blah blah.
But in their defense, we did come back with one startling revelation. Those windmills are really freakin’ huge. Like, much bigger than you’re thinking. And they’re also spinning much faster than they seem to be from the highway. And they make seriously keen noises while they’re doing it.
So while I’m in far too much pain to say that I’m glad I went, I’m not entirely pissed. Which is notable, considering the group I did it with. That time they guilted me into running a marathon at noon in July in Corpus Christi? Entirely pissed.
Now I’m going to go search for "Big ass" just for the joy of seeing XE pop up on the search results. Who else is with me? C’mon, don’t be shy, raise your hands.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 10/28/2005 9:52 PM

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Holy shit guys, I just hit one of the High Level Mcdonalds Monopoly games. No Joke.

Odds of winning: 1 in 2,091,956,912

This one:

Winner will receive Electronics (one [1] Home Theater System & one [1] TV), a $5,000 Best Buy Gift Card that may be used toward the purchase of LG appliances, and Best Buy installation from a participating Best Buy store. Gift Cards can only be used for future purchases. Gift Cards may be used to pay shipping charges and/or taxes on purchases; and any remaining balance thereafter will be issued in the form of another Best Buy Gift Card. ARV – $9,499.95

How’s that for a Christmas present?

Chestnuts roasted by Matt(#2?) @ 10/28/2005 10:42 PM

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Damn Matt(#2), I don’t know if I want to buy twelve Big Macs or choke you… Congrats *shakes fist*

Chestnuts roasted by Mattman @ 10/28/2005 11:21 PM

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