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04/24/2005: X-E goes Upstate! X-E buys a Vader doll!

Here’s that trip report I promised — a visit to my friend’s creepy old vacation home in Delhi, New York. On the outskirts of a farm town, the place is in the middle of nowhere, plagued with ghost stories and stocked with enough cheap beer to convince anyone that they’re actually seeing ghosts. I love the filthy ol’ place. The very long article features every last nuance of the trips we take there, or at least, the ones I feel comfortable mentioning in a public forum. If you and your circle don’t have a place like this to escape to, I strongly suggest finding one. Just leave your good clothes at home. If you like looking at stale Pepsi, this article is for voo.

Had to pick up a few kiddy birthday presents last night. While at Toys ‘R’ Us, I spotted this Darth Vader “Wrestling Buddy,” made by the same company who put out all of those WWF/WWE/WCW dolls of the same stature through the years. Basically, they’re dolls made soft and durable enough for kids to pound the Holy Hell out of without worry. I’ve only had one other, striking the likeness of “Macho King” Randy Savage, but I think it’s pretty safe to say that Vader’s set a new standard when it comes to wrestling buddies. It even shouts various Vader-phrases when you punch its stomach. A bit steep at twenty bucks, but it definitely has that conversational couch pillow appeal deal going for it.

There’s a new Revenge of the Sith cereal, too…

I guess it’s only called “Star Wars Cereal,” arriving in boxes either with Darth Vader or Yoda featured. The cereal itself tastes fine, though the marshmallows are just recolored rehashes from previous Star Wars cereals and other completely unrelated cereals. At least they snuck a General Grievous head in there.

This week, I’ll show you a much better example of a Sith-based food product — Pop Tarts, with lava inside. Yayyyy.


Posted by Matt. E-mail me!

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Discussion Thread: 103 comments

What are those blue things? Are they supposed to be R2? They look like public mailboxes… or Batman.

Ghosted by LuigiHann @ 04/24/2005 2:31 PM EDT

I can just imagine my dog dry-humping poor Darthy a la Marcel and Rachel’s Curious George doll.

Never in my life did I expect to make a Friends shout-out at X-E. I must be getting old.

Ghosted by trajeal @ 04/24/2005 2:33 PM EDT

Great, I just poured coffee, too!

Ghosted by Kim @ 04/24/2005 2:46 PM EDT

Finally, I can fulfill my week-long dream of a completely star wars-y breakfast: Darth Vader Marshmallow Cereal? Check.Darth Vader Lava-themed Pop-Tarts? Check. Darth Vader Orange Juice? Well…that doesn’t exist, but the stuff I’ve got does have black things floating in it, so that’ll do. Let’s get geek-ed.

Ghosted by Road Block @ 04/24/2005 3:03 PM EDT

On an additional note, what is that grey pudgy marshmallow on the box? It’s…unsettling.

Ghosted by Road Block @ 04/24/2005 3:05 PM EDT

I’m confused about the picture on the box. Is Darth shoving a bowl of cereal at the viewer, like a pie in the face? Or was the bowl of cereal sitting on his shoulder and it just fell off? Or is the bowl of cereal imbedded in his body armor? Oh, and those white and blue marshmallows do look like mailboxes, the light saber ones look more like the magical sword in The Legend Of Zelda, and the grey ones look like, well, pebbles.

Ghosted by Destro @ 04/24/2005 3:28 PM EDT

Well Matt, congrats on the Delhi article. You’ve added to my anticipation of finishing finals, getting out of DC’s inner beltway, and back to upstate with plenty of beer and places epitomized by the Delhi house tour.

Ghosted by Carri @ 04/24/2005 3:39 PM EDT

I used to have a Hulk Hogan beat em up doll. It was the only time I could say I owned a doll without getting beat up.

Ghosted by Modern Day Pirates @ 04/24/2005 3:40 PM EDT

Awesome trip article. But have you been outside yet? How do you know that you didn’t die on that bridge on the drive home? BEWARE OF SANDWORMS!

Ghosted by Eddie Lightning Frog @ 04/24/2005 3:45 PM EDT

Even with fingerprints all over my monitor I saw the ghostly evidence in that graveyard picture. Moisture my foot. That house is creepy to the max.

Ghosted by squee4242 @ 04/24/2005 4:34 PM EDT

I think I saw Ralph Macchio’s face in one of those orbs.

I love how the unmentionables in that Pepsi have decided to stop defying gravity and let themselves sink to the bottom of the bottle, leaving the soda tu-tone. It’s like a Tequila Sunrise in soda form.

Does anyone else remember a PDA for fire prevention starring the two and only R2-D2 and C-3PO? I seem to recall some robotic coughing and waving of metallic appendages. I seriously doubt that they would have approved of your Bonfire of the Hangover-ees, Matt.

See, it all comes back around to the House. It always does.

Ghosted by trajeal @ 04/24/2005 4:34 PM EDT

Oh, yeah. I wanted to show you all a picture I took yesterday at a Mini Traj’s friend’s birthday party. Check out the sensei or instructor or whoever he is: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v252/KermitD.Frog/ClaudaisSixthBirthday003.jpg His face is just one big moisture mask, apparently. Here’s another pic w/ him looking normal: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v252/KermitD.Frog/ClaudaisSixthBirthday010.jpg

Before I forget, can someone explain to me how to do a link here? I tried awhile ago and didn’t get it right, so I gave up. I tried the < url=http:www.blahblah.com > Blahdibbyblahblah < /url > thing. What corrections do I need to make? Thankee-sai in advance.

Ghosted by trajeal @ 04/24/2005 4:45 PM EDT

Simple, traj!

(a href="http://www.thewebsite.com/theimage.jpg")click here(/a)

Replace the parenthesis with < and >, respectively.

Ghosted by Matt @ 04/24/2005 4:47 PM EDT

Matt is still alive! So what if the Christmas design is still up?

The article on the house was very nice, though. Here’s hoping I can find a place like that when I’m as ancient sa you are.

Ghosted by The ORIGINAL Paul @ 04/24/2005 4:51 PM EDT

Let’s try this.

Asston Kutcher missed out on Punk’ding the dead Pope. Dick.

Ghosted by trajeal @ 04/24/2005 5:00 PM EDT

I can’t help staring at the picture of the orbs and trying to connect the dots….

…Whoa! Kinda makes out Vaders mask if you connect them just right…

Ghosted by Mr mango @ 04/24/2005 5:15 PM EDT

I love finding cabinets with stuff in it that hasn’t been moved in 20 years. I consider it the equivilent of finding a time capsule.

Ghosted by ed @ 04/24/2005 5:27 PM EDT

I grew up in the sticks, so every weekend was a booze-soaked holiday retreat into densely-forested back roads. I’m glad that the appeal of such dangerous forays isn’t lost on you big-city folk.

Ghosted by The Yeti @ 04/24/2005 5:33 PM EDT

Hey Matt, I just picked up the Toyfare magazine with you in it, and reading through the article, I found one ver…very…fatal error.

it was Fact #37: Peter did NOT create the G.I. Jew Doll. Look at the pic they used in the magazine, it’s not even him!

Now to read the article!

Ghosted by Invader Norbert @ 04/24/2005 6:50 PM EDT

Wow, I haven’t had Tato Skins in years. I wish they’d sell it again, that stuff was great, and that TGIFriday’s stuff they sell today don’t come anywhere near it.

Also, I know how you feel about people selling chicken on the side of the road. In some parts of suburban Raleigh they do that, and it makes me question whether or not anyone actually stops buy to get chicken inside little tents on the side of the road. And I thought the Triangle was one of the more progressive parts of the country…

Ghosted by mjf7583 @ 04/24/2005 7:30 PM EDT

They have Tato Skins at the Dollar Tree near my house. They also have mozzarella sticks in puffy chip form. Yum.

Ghosted by trajeal @ 04/24/2005 9:12 PM EDT

It sounds like you had a fun weekend, Matt, even if you were drunk for most of it. At least you got away from it all AND found great X-E fodder in the bargain.

Cape May County is filled with houses like The House, from the better-kept versions in Cape May to the huge old farmhouses and summer homes in Middle and Upper Townships that come complete with large plots of land and old graveyards. For me, going to one of these places now is more than a getaway; it’s memories. I grew up in at least two houses like the House. Yes, they were spooky. One was so full of bugs, my parents had to call the exterminators twice in one year. We couldn’t use the smaller bathroom in one house because of all the bugs. That same house’s 20s-era heating system almost gave my family carbon monoxide poisoning.

Even with all the problems, I retain a fondness for old homes and buildings to this very day. Maybe that’s why I’m in my current apartment. I don’t think it pre-dates the House, but it’s plenty old enough – the heater alone takes up a good chunk of the living room.

Ghosted by starwenn @ 04/24/2005 9:18 PM EDT

Man that house really brings back memories of my aunt’s house in Ohio. She lived on a old farm so far away from other people, it literally was a 20 minute drive if you wanted to go get food or rent a movie or something. It was so quiet and peaceful and relaxing. I was only there a few times, since it was several states away, but I loved every second of it.

Sadly she passed away in September and the farm was sold. I will never stop missing her or the farm.

Ghosted by Punisher Bass @ 04/24/2005 11:19 PM EDT

I would so have to keep that G.I. Joe thermos. Forget the Pepsi bottle, I’d be more upset about them throwing away that thermos.

So why is it that I don’t have a place like this to go to? Oh yeah, it’s because I’m too busy with school, and whenver I’m at home, there isn’t a place like this for hours. There might’ve been like a place like this close by like 10 years ago, but such a place has most certainly been torn down and had suburban homes built on the property. I hate California.

Ghosted by Nate @ 04/24/2005 11:35 PM EDT

My sympathies, P. Bass.

Ghosted by The Yeti @ 04/25/2005 12:11 PM EDT

Actually, those TGIFriday’s potato skins seem to be exactly the same as Tato Skins. Erm, at least, they’re made by the same company. The Meijer stores around here sell both brands side-by-side.

Ghosted by steve-o @ 04/25/2005 12:25 PM EDT

General Grievous marshmallow heads.. genius!

Ghosted by Review the World @ 04/25/2005 12:33 PM EDT

The vaguely R2D2-ish shape of the blue-and-white marshmallow actually reminds me more of the little-known character Señor from Homestar Runner. Change the white to red and add a trunk and a couple of stars, and it could be a passable Republican National Committee logo.

I’m still pissed that George Lucas changed fast food allegiances from Pepsico’s Yum! brands to Burger King, as that measn we won’t get Pizza Hut, Taco Bell, and KFC festooned as one of three planets this time around. And Pepsi’s running a Revenge of the Sith promotion, yet Burger King is a Coke restaurant, so will BK not be able to put the Coke logo on cups while this promotion is in effect, or is Darth Vader going to endorse both sides of the cola aisle depending on whether or not you happen to be inside or outside of a Burger King at the time? (I know, I think way too much about stupid things…)

Ghosted by Steve Brandon @ 04/25/2005 1:19 AM EDT

Seems like a sorta cool place. I would have played the Spy game just to do a future article. Same with the stores you mentioned.

Since you mentioned Corey Feldman, he’s mentioned in this week’s Entertainment Weekly in an interview with Corey Haim about the DVD release of License to Drive.

We still got those tato skins where I live. They’re good. But I prefer the TGIFriday’s Chili Chese flavor ones. Also, didn’t the Poore Bros use to make pizza-flavor tortilla chips? I don’t remember what they were called though.

Off topic, I felt sorta old yesterday watching a show on tv last night. It was the 10th anniversary "reunion" of All That on Nick. 10 years? I still remember when it first premiered. It rocked.

Ghosted by JLAJRC @ 04/25/2005 1:34 AM EDT

Wow, this is late April and every single tree I saw in those photographs had no leaves. They must be like that all year. Yeah, that place is depressing all right…

Ghosted by Mars @ 04/25/2005 1:51 AM EDT

JLAJRC…ya I fell old too. I missed it cause of work, but I taped it. It got really, really, really HORRIBLE after all of the old cast left. The nerve that Jaime Spears was there…

After reading the article: Holy….Crap. This has got to be one of your best articles that you’ve written, right up there with the Photog Blog, the Chia Plot, the Advent Calendars, and the Jones Soda Holiday Pack Test (which I got greenlit on Fark)

If this article doesnt get on fark, it would be a serious crime.

Ghosted by Invader Norbert @ 04/25/2005 1:54 AM EDT

Tato Skins were started by Keebler, yet that bag has no Keebler logo on it. The theory I’ll go on is that a smaller company bought the rights to make Tato Skins when Keebler wasn’t making enough money off ‘em, and only sells them in small rural places.

Ghosted by Mars @ 04/25/2005 1:54 AM EDT

Mars- I gotta say, I had no idea Tato skins even still existed. When I first saw Matt’s photo of that bag, I thought it was an expired treasure of the past. Man, the things you learn about America from X-E. It’s been too long since I’ve been out of rural parts of this lovely country of ours.

Ghosted by Nate @ 04/25/2005 6:21 AM EDT

Hey, Matt, doesn’t burning styrofoam make the flames turn green? I know burning wrapping paper will make pretty colors. Although, I can’t imagine the birthday celebtration that would occur at the House.

Hey, I bet if you follow that attic crawlspace, you’ll fund Jimmie. Watch out for zombies, though.

So, today is my 30th birthday. I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.

Ghosted by trajeal @ 04/25/2005 8:23 AM EDT

Is it just me, or am I the only one who thinks Matt ought to get someone else to help update the site? With his busy schedule, X-E is practically dead to the world.

Ghosted by Hogwash @ 04/25/2005 9:47 AM EDT

Now that isn’t very nice.

Ghosted by Matt @ 04/25/2005 9:53 AM EDT

Christ…this is nothing. I created a wrestling website back in college and I haven’t updated the damn thing in SIX YEARS! I’d happily provide a link to it, but I’ve forgotten the address…

Ghosted by The Yeti @ 04/25/2005 10:03 AM EDT

Invader- I was kind of surprised that Kevin Kopelow and Lorri beth Denberg weren’t there. What exactly are they doing lately? If Kenan Thompson can do it, you would think they would too.

I live in Iowa and Tato Skins are in many grocery stores cheaply.
By the way, were those other chips called Pizzarias or something? I know they came in cheese, pepperoni (yech), and supreme (my favorite).

Ghosted by JLAJRC @ 04/25/2005 10:04 AM EDT

Hogwash -

Leave him alone – if you think you could do a better job of maintaining a website, working full-time, seeking out and taking pictures of nauseatingly ancient foods and beverages, obscure toys, etc., then go for it.

Perhaps instead of bitching about the lack of updates, why not consider them as rare jewels or something?

DAY-amn.

Ghosted by Gretchen @ 04/25/2005 10:21 AM EDT

Matt, the article on the house was some of your best work to date. It ranks up there as one of my favorite X-E articles, my all-time favorite being the Casino Arcade feature from a few months back.

Ghosted by Kathodos @ 04/25/2005 12:02 PM EDT

Ok, here’s what ya do before your next trip out there: get someone you trust to help out. Go up there days before the actual weekend, and gather some twigs and sticks. Make you some "Blair Witch" style figures. Various sizes. Stash them out of the way. Sometime during the weekend, you and your cohort do the sneaky-sneaky out and set up as many of the sticky-men as possible. If you can hang up a big one from a tree branch, groovy. Don’t even mention or watch BWP, and let the others find the figures, like, early the next morning. While they’re freaking out, go stand in the corner. It helps if they’re wasted, and you’re not. Remember, kids: Don’t do drugs, but take advantage of those that do. They are excellent for trying out your repretoire of bar bets.

Ghosted by kingklash @ 04/25/2005 12:10 PM EDT

Hello all. I have been keeping up but haven’t had much to say.
I have been meaning to send in some pics of the classroom all of the SW stuff in it but…been…so ….busy….

Ghosted by The Manimal @ 04/25/2005 12:34 PM EDT

remember that song. . . . . .
"tato skins got baked potato appeal, cause they’re made with potatoes and skins that are real"
p.s. i found this site googleing scratchandsniff stickers and the pictures never showed, but i did enjoy your commercial page

Ghosted by k-b @ 04/25/2005 2:11 PM EDT

Hey Matt!

New to the site. Let me say "thanks" for one of the most entertaining websites I’ve uncovered yet. Great stuff! The Delhi "House of Horrors" article was perfect. I spend much time adventuring in those parts and know the area well. How about a review of that ‘Spy vs. Spy’ game in the near future? It would make an excellent addition to your ‘Shitty Board Games’ collection. Tell you what . . . I am going to clean out my Generation X’er rented ‘packed with shit’ storage bin, and send you any ‘historic’ treasures I find. There should be some gems tucked away in there. Much better than trashing the shit, huh? If you’re interested, contact me. I’d be glad to do my part to keep X-Entertainment alive!
Take care, Bro! Keep up the good work!

Ghosted by REBLYELL @ 04/25/2005 3:09 PM EDT

Oh yeah, that was one of the more interesting things I’ve read lately, on the site or off. We also have that Spy Vs. Spy board game, and we’ve also played it just once, if even that. I’d say that I have an identical television, a standard model mid-priced, mid-sized, mid-Nineties Sony Trinitron, to the one at the house, but the version of the television I have has a full-sized "SET UP" button on the left, not the tiny button that the television in the photos has. There also seems to be a lot of crud on the left speaker… at first, I thought that someone had actually kicked the speaker in a bit.

Weirdly, I have always thought Pepsi was an even "solution", where all the liquids are more or less evenly dissolved, but, as it appears that the liquid at the top of the bottle is fairly clear, I guess Pepsi is more of a "suspension", where, given a long enough period of time, the heavier ingredients will sink towards the bottom.

Is "alcoffee" a typo? Or is it just shorthand for drinking both coffee and alcohol at night?

If anyone’s interested in seeing more alleged ghost photos, I’ve got one of my own, though it’s one taken in the daytime, on a racetrack, in front of a large crowd. (Not saying it’s a ghost, just something weird I can’t quite identify that looks kind of like a face.)

Ghosted by Steve Brandon @ 04/25/2005 3:11 PM EDT

"tato skins got baked potato appeal/cause they’re made from potato skins that’re real"

that damn jingle has been running through my head since i read this article.

and thanks for giving a girl from oklahoma a view of what upstate new york is like. i always wondered why people said it was NYC and the rest is "upstate"…now i think i understand.

definitely one of the best articles on X-E. Thanks!

Ghosted by Rosella @ 04/25/2005 3:58 PM EDT

Matt,
I commend you on another great read. And I have to be honest, sometimes when you write lengthy articles like this I skim through them, but this one I read from beginning to end and I thought it was fantastic. Maybe it was the creepy aspects of it, maybe it’s because my boyfriend and I love vacationing in Lake George but at least that’s a living breathing area…your friend chose to live here why?? And that photo of the house at night is DAMN spooky. Keep up the great work!

Ghosted by Melissa Y. @ 04/25/2005 4:12 PM EDT

Matt,

Great site, I have been a loyal reader for well over a year now and love all the articles. I think I hold a new record for your site, I read your entire blog from day one to today in only three days while "working" at my office. Great stuff, keep up the good work. Ahh… the memories.

Ghosted by Tigerfan @ 04/25/2005 4:21 PM EDT

Steve, I think I figured out what you have a picture of, and I can’t believe you have photo evidence of him in the wild: Headshot Costume

Ghosted by Backwards Barry Wins Everytime @ 04/25/2005 5:00 PM EDT

"This is Darth Vader, he’s my buddy. We like to wrestle. Tee-hee!"

Ghosted by kingklash knows a few haunts in Oklahoma. @ 04/25/2005 5:07 PM EDT

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