We’ve seen plenty of slimes plenty of times in our journey together, but for those new to the track, let’s review: The Masters of the Universe Slime Pit, The Masters of the Universe Slime Pit Instruction Manual, The New Masters of the Universe Slime Pit, The Harry Potter Slime Chamber, Garbage Pail Kids Tacky Snappers, Rubber Body Parts In Slime, Vending Machine Slime, Jabba the Hutt Slime, Ivan Ooze Slime, Mattel’s Original Slime, and God, I bet I’m forgetting a few. Me…you…we love our slime. You know it’s true, and you know you’re excited, because I’m about to dust off what many consider to be the best slime…of all time. Only on the second proofread did I realize that I’ve been rhyming this whole timing.
Yup, The Real Ghostbusters “Ecto-Plazm,” a canister of neon-colored yucky stuff that no kid could be without. The goop finds its roots in the original Ghostbusters flick from `84 — the term applies to any gloppy gooey stuff that happens to surface when spooks and specters appear. It’s what Bill Murray got slimed with. On the beloved cartoon, Ecto-Plazm was present in nearly every episode, even if they didn’t bother to keep pointing out what it was every time a scene called for animated happy snot. It’s special stuff, and in toy form, Ecto-Plazm was just an absolutely essential ingredient of childhood.
First off, it’s not like all those other slimes. Ecto-Plazm was much looser — almost watery. While this precluded anyone from fondling the stuff without making a mess, it had the best “drip factor” of any toy slime — here’s an example. Unique in more ways than that, Ecto-Plazm had only a lightly offensive odor — a rare trait in any edition of nontoxic novelty slime. The gunk came in many colors, because honestly, kids went through six cans a month and we were starting to crave variety. The colors afforded us a bit of extra incentive for repeat purchases, but even more so than that, the cans each contained a mystery ghost figure buried deep in the sludge. The figures were tiny, cheap, one-colored pissants, like this guy, a creature of unspeakable cleavage. Nobody cared enough to complain about the lousy figures. We came for slime…if they wanted to throw in a lousy figure, sure, fuck it, we’d take that too.
I don’t know when to halt the gushing on this — I’m sure Ecto-Plazm is the kinda thing you’d have to have been there for to “get.” The Real Ghostbusters wasn’t the most popular cartoon franchise of its time by any stretch, but it always felt extra special for some reason — like the friend who doesn’t live near you but remains your favorite to hang out with, or something that sounds even more poetic. This intangible magic trickled down to the toy line. We didn’t get Ghostbustering junk as often as the other contenders’ wares, but man…it always made our day when we did. Today, we salute a very special slime. I hate when I sound so National Geographyffy.
Posted by Matt. E-mail me!
Ghosted by 
Ponsonby Britt?
But that trick never works!
Presto!